₦airaland Forum

ksslib: The birth of social media has seen a huge rise on the number of so called dating and relationship advice experts, who heaven knows, know absolutely nothing about being in relationships because they have either never been in one, or were in one that crashed prematurely just minutes after she said "yes". Here are some exclusive relationship advice from Da ksslib himself-- a locally renowned expert on relationships---guaranteed to keep you happy.

■ When choosing a partner, never go for the one you love but the one that loves you. The constant reminder that should things go south, you have no emotional investment in the relationship and can bone a totally fresh chick the next day without feeling an iota of guilt, is a sure banker to keep you always happy and looking young.

■ To save yourself the headache of trying to figure out if she is the right one or not, tell her how you believe in "No sex before marriage" so that if she believes in it too , you can quickly move on and continue searching for your missing rib who doesn't.

■ Too much sex in a relationship can quickly become boring. For a relationship to thrive, it is normally advised to limit it to atleast five times a day.

■ If she says "I love you", reply with something like "I know, bighead" and smack her head playfully with your fists hard enough to give a swollen eye. You don't wanna appear as too soft. Girls love bad boys.

■ For peace to reign, make a personal Vow or more advisably, swear an oath to never attempt to win an argument.

■ Her happiness should be your utmost priority unless it has to do with allowing her watch telemnudo, knowing fully well that if you dont watch that current football game, you will die.

■ It is normally advisable to avoid women who are hot, loves cleaning, great cook, God fearing, independent and DOES NOT LOVE MONEY, as chances are--- it is a genetically modified zygote that escaped from a biochemical lab.

■ Her hot friend might try to seduce you. Why try to fight it or resist when even the word "SEDUCED" itself tells every sane person that you were the victim.

■ Women hate boring and predictable guys. She daring you to slap her during a heated argument doesn't mean you should prove her right and do it. Rather, disappointing her with a crippling blow to the jaw simultaneously followed by a bicycle kick to the breasts will remind her how full of surprises you are.

■ Learn to accept the fact that she will eventually cheat on you. Doing this will kind of cushion the blow when she does and somehow erase the guilt you ought to feel when sharing her nude pics all over social media.

■ "She is a gold-digger and is only after my money". Reciting this quote every morning while naked over an anointed picture of your Atm card will wade off any evil spirit of over-spending on things like the burial of her Uncle--- who God knows, has died five times in just one month.


■ Never ever tell her she's fat to her face. It's disrespectful, mean and very ungentleman-like. Sensitive issues like her weight should only be discussed where and absolutely when necessary---like in a crowded BRT bus after you both have broken-up.

■ She will eventually forgive you for sleeping with her best friend but will never forgive that--- poke-nosing, utterly annoying best friend of her's you never liked in the first place-- for sleeping with you. Gentlemen, use your pick wisely.

Source: ksslib ( Locally renowned relationship and dating advice expert)

[color=#000033]Lmao. If I slap you now, you'll say I'm wicked, abi? [/color]

Ksslib:
[/font]

Source: ksslib ( Locally renowned relationship and dating advice expert)

pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

Vincent41:
pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

[color=#000033]You missed the sarcasm.

Since you missed it, here are few things:
1) Love and money can keep a woman or a man. They don't have to be exclusive.

2) Women aren't sex objects for fucking. Let's try this, "You are meant for fucking, nothing more."

3) Fools don't fall in love. They don't understand what love means. Love requires a degree of intelligence.

4) Not all women; no matter what you do for some men, they'll still fuc.k other women - it's the sad and sorry state of cheating. What type of women have you been meeting lately, bro?

In any case you intend typing that I posted 1-4 to get free sex/accolades from the feminists/female folks, I've helped you out.

Stop taking sarcasm too seriously - or personally.[/color]

Vincent41:
pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

Who says your precious wife can't screw other men either

BizBloke:
[color=#000033]Lmao. If I slap you now, you'll say I'm wicked, abi? [/color]

Lol. Madman, u will never change.

Longest time.

Vincent41:
pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

I guess all through your days in school up until now you've never heard the word "sarcasm".

Vincent41:
pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

This wife, whom only she is deserving of your love and trust, is she not a woman? Doesn't the "women are only good for ffucking, nothing more" rule applies to her, too?

Afterall, she's a woman just like the rest.

BizBloke:
[color=#000033]You missed the sarcasm.

.[/color]

Me sef tire for the guy . lol

Ksslib:
Lol. Madman, u will never change.

Longest time.

[color=#000033]I'm not a chameleon. Why I go change ni?

Yeah, longest time. I dey see your handwriting all over NL. Well done o, Mr. Writer.

How things for Benin Republic?[/color]

Ksslib:
Me sef tire for the guy . lol

[color=#000033]Hahahaha. I tell you. [/color]

[quote author=BizBloke post=47966845][color=#000033]I'm not a chameleon. Why I go change ni?

Yeah, longest time. I dey see your handwriting all over NL. Well done o, Mr. Writer.

How things for Benin Republic?[/color]
Benin republic is fine. The team of researchers you funded are still digging deep into the heart of the jungle with the hope of finding a suitable herb that will cure your madness.

Some points are conflicting

[quote author=Ksslib post=47978340][/quote][color=#000033]I funded a research? Whoa! I'm surprised but excited about it and the opportunities it'll provide to cure mad men like you. [/color]

Vincent41:
pure Rubbish cos it does nt work...
Character keeps a man nt beauty,sex or hip,Money Keeps a woman nt Love....for me,women are meant for fucking,notin more...Only fools fall in love....no matter what u do for a woman,she will Bleep another man..
Love only ur wife,trust only her

People who don't understand sarcasm..

I assume ur Uptight and don't have a sense of humor