₦airaland Forum

Gwangwadangwa77:
listen my brother. I give no room to moral decadence

nameerfhtennek:
It's more than 20minutes, I'm still unable to put words together to begin this story. I will try keep it simple and necessarily detailed so everyone will understand the true picture of what happened, why against my belief that writing personal experiences on social media is immature, I had to still write mine. Let's just say I'm not thinking right now, maybe I'm so upset but truth is, I need your advice.

I'm writing this thread seated at the back of a Hilux truck just outside our apartment. Yaa, that me in the picture. You see, today is EID and believe me I should be resting in the house since I'm not working today. Days like this only come by 6times in a whole year and more than anything, I would have loved resting than being out here.

It was yesterday evening, she called and said she her driver were headed to my office. She wanted to pick some stuffs around my office. Yaa, I forgot to say this is Saudi Arabia. If you know Saudi quite well, you will agree with me that a husband will definitely get exhausted running errands for his wife or the family. I was not in the mood for shopping but she wanted to shop. She got upset that I didn't want to accompany her shopping.

She did her shopping alone and returned few minutes before I closed from work. We headed home. Unknown to me, I forgot my internet router in my office because I was rushing to get home and continue with my FIFA 16.
Her internet service expired some days back so we were using mine.

While playing game, she walked into the seating room and demanded for my router. Mine, not hers. With her tone and facial expression demanding the router, I didn't respond because there was an indication that she was warming up for a quarrel. I wasn't just in the mood. The thing is, she is very skilled in extending her anger phases. That is one thing I can't understand till today. Believe me, it was not like this while we were dating. Sorry, I forgot to tell you I married my university girlfriend, she years my junior and the same department. Ya, I'm one of those guys that dated and planned for the future with their girls at the same time. God blessed that plan but at this point I don't understand everything that has been happening for the past one year plus since we got married. She repeatedly demanded that I handed over my router to her but I was quiet. Meanwhile, it occurred to me that I forgot the router in my office the minute she first asked about it. Truth is, I actually needed to use the internet that night for my online FIFA.

After several times of asking for the router and no response from me, she took the TV remote and switched off the TV. She walked straight to the kitchen and hid the remote. I approached her in the kitchen and told her I was not ready for any kinda quarrel. We have had enough for the past one year of getting married. I then told her I forgot the router in my office, I didn't have it. I guess she didn't believe me, she never did. She told me to leave her alone. I returned back to the seating room with my heart beating fast. I knew she wanted a serious quarrel that night. After some minutes, I returned to the kitchen and requested for the remote. Then I figured out she hid it in her pant. Pretending I was passing by, I swiftly went for the remote from under her short gown and grabbed it. She didn't expect I knew where she hid it. She followed me behind and ceased the game console, second indication she wanted me to react. I do have a problem with my temper just like every human, male or female. I have also learnt to deal with it by walking away at times I feel I was going to lose it. The same reason I'm outside at this time, 9:55 pm Saudi time. She knows I have fought hard to tame my temper issues but most times, she makes deliberate efforts to have me overreact to her nags and rants.

I watched her hide the console in her pant yet again. I shuddered in obvious fear because I knew what the woman wanted, a fight. Unable to deal with it,the intimidation and the shame, I went for the console and squeezed it out from her hand while she was trying to hold it tight. That was when the trouble then started. She wanted a buffer to help her spill everything she had nursed in her mind. "You are a violent person!! You can kill, idiot!! You were not shown love by your parents, that is why you will squeeze your wife's hand to collect the console. They allowed you to grow up in the street without parental guidance and love." Then it came....pwaaaaaaah!!! She spat on my face!!!!! God knows, I have never been spat at before, not by my parents, not by my siblings, not by anybody. " I agree I was not shown love by my parents but your Dad is a coward for running away from your mother without being there for you guys when he needed to play his roles as a father. That explains the reason you are like this", I said and walked back to the seating room.

I managed to play a few games which I lost mostly and then slept off around past 5am this morning. Around 3pm, I woke up and went to the office. Not like I had work but I needed to clear my head away from the house. If only there was alcohol in Saudi, I would have been somewhere in a hotel drinking away the shame. When I returned home by past 7pm, hungry and tired. I needed to continue my game but I could no longer find the game console and the TV remote. I asked for it and she ignored me. I managed to eat and then left the house to this truck.

You see, I love my wife more than anything, more than anyone. She is one person in the whole world I could go any length for. I love her, that was why I forgave her when she broke up with me after I left Nigeria for Saudi Arabia. She broke up with me few months after I came to Saudi and started dating another guy twice her age. She says she never expected I would come back to her after she left me but I did. I did because I saw a future with her, a future I imagined, believed in and worked towards its reality. Today we have gotten to a level where most people out there would want to be, our colleagues envy is because they believe we are privileged and blessed but what they don't know is that in the truth, I have no peace. This marriage has become my legacy and my curse.

I want to send her back to Nigeria in few days time and I hope I'm not making a mistake!!! Spitting on my face, nah nah....am so fed up!!!!

smellingmenses:
forcefully taking remote from your woman..... is very wrong! at that point she needs attention! which you denied her earlier by refusing to accompany her to the store for shopping without reason! its a form of physical assault... the excellency of power is in the control and refraining from using it...... taking the remote by is capable of invalidating the woman's self worth... and denigrating her person..... hurt physically and emotionally! from here anything could have happened.....anything at all.

you should work on your marriage and stop fifa game career that leads nowhere.... grow up and be responsible....

from the

nwamehn:
My brother, u have said all these over and over again, the simple question I asked u from the very first post u haven't answered. Why are u dodging that simple question? I am not arguing with u whether the man or the woman did bigger wrong. I was only interested in @billyonaire's post because he said "apologise" and then u quoted me to say the girl can react anyhow. I then asked u, which I'm asking u again, if u were the man that didn't accompany ur wife for shopping for no reason, and u ignored her when she asked u a question playing FIFA, and u further dragged the remote from her, and because of that she insulted ur parents and spits on ur face, will u go back and apologise to her? Pls, answer me and don't dodge it this time around.

Oyimeoyimemua:
I beg to disagree pls, there are times when signals are missed
why would a wife hide remote in her pant of all places ,her actions were wrong anyways but I still feel its something they can handle instead of sending her back
marriage is beautiful but it needs patients and understanding

akaballball:
Grabbing d bum...is what he should have done before d wife spat on his face n guess what he failed .....

The man should accept he caused it....

u wey dey advice man to send d wife to Naija away from him..u know it could be d end of d marriage. talking from example...
now what should have been settle amicable go lead to divorce

Is pple like u that will do everything to save a marriage but advice a friend wrongly....

Now a man that has married b4 n didnt succeed ....i wont advice that man for even my enemy ...talk more of a man that chase the wife..

If d man didnt forgive his wife ..it shows ..lack of understanding ..wickedness ...n lack of ability to control a woman.

If a man beats d wife it doent end d marriage now..spit...u wan make marriage end..

sobu know Jesus was spat on...n u know the rest

VolTOxic:
Most men would have given her a beating, but you kept your cool. For that I respect and admire you. Now to the point, Yes. Please send her away. That woman hates you!

How can your own wife say that horrible thing and spat to you face?! She hates you. She have crossed the line.
You said your marriage is a curse. You are not happy at all. Neither is she. You are not making a mistake. Do it.


You are a true gentleman. You deserve better. You'll find someone to heal your wounds. Don't even waste your time for any shìt counselling. She is not the woman you fell for. That woman is gone the moment she spat. Forever.

chuksbogus2001:
I don't know how Saudi deals men beating women .let me tell u when we were small my mum used to be very arrogant and rude to my dad cos he is a quiet man not until my mums mother I mean her own mum told my dad to beat her .After my dad gave her a better beating peace ,love respect came to our house since 1984 till now my mum has never raise her voice against my dad. Am not advocating women battery but a times small spanking does the magic

Ishilove:
This is so wrong and highly disrespectful. Is she a snake? Why is she spitting like a king cobra??

Please just don't send her back yet. Trash this out with her abeg. You are a MAN and need to wear the trousers of the house. Sit her down and warn her never to try that rubbish again.

You may also take her for a pregnancy test. I hear women are bitchy when preggies so it's possible that may be the reason why she is using you as spitting target.

This is insane

smellingmenses:
sincerely it won't happen to me.... I pull the brakes on domestic conflict early! I wouldnt have dragged the remote.... she needs my attention ... I will oblige her.... the op is very immature n should be unmarried!

nameerfhtennek:
It's more than 20minutes, I'm still unable to put words together to begin this story. I will try keep it simple and necessarily detailed so everyone will understand the true picture of what happened, why against my belief that writing personal experiences on social media is immature, I had to still write mine. Let's just say I'm not thinking right now, maybe I'm so upset but truth is, I need your advice.

I'm writing this thread seated at the back of a Hilux truck just outside our apartment. Yaa, that me in the picture. You see, today is EID and believe me I should be resting in the house since I'm not working today. Days like this only come by 6times in a whole year and more than anything, I would have loved resting than being out here.

It was yesterday evening, she called and said she her driver were headed to my office. She wanted to pick some stuffs around my office. Yaa, I forgot to say this is Saudi Arabia. If you know Saudi quite well, you will agree with me that a husband will definitely get exhausted running errands for his wife or the family. I was not in the mood for shopping but she wanted to shop. She got upset that I didn't want to accompany her shopping.

She did her shopping alone and returned few minutes before I closed from work. We headed home. Unknown to me, I forgot my internet router in my office because I was rushing to get home and continue with my FIFA 16.
Her internet service expired some days back so we were using mine.

While playing game, she walked into the seating room and demanded for my router. Mine, not hers. With her tone and facial expression demanding the router, I didn't respond because there was an indication that she was warming up for a quarrel. I wasn't just in the mood. The thing is, she is very skilled in extending her anger phases. That is one thing I can't understand till today. Believe me, it was not like this while we were dating. Sorry, I forgot to tell you I married my university girlfriend, she years my junior and the same department. Ya, I'm one of those guys that dated and planned for the future with their girls at the same time. God blessed that plan but at this point I don't understand everything that has been happening for the past one year plus since we got married. She repeatedly demanded that I handed over my router to her but I was quiet. Meanwhile, it occurred to me that I forgot the router in my office the minute she first asked about it. Truth is, I actually needed to use the internet that night for my online FIFA.

After several times of asking for the router and no response from me, she took the TV remote and switched off the TV. She walked straight to the kitchen and hid the remote. I approached her in the kitchen and told her I was not ready for any kinda quarrel. We have had enough for the past one year of getting married. I then told her I forgot the router in my office, I didn't have it. I guess she didn't believe me, she never did. She told me to leave her alone. I returned back to the seating room with my heart beating fast. I knew she wanted a serious quarrel that night. After some minutes, I returned to the kitchen and requested for the remote. Then I figured out she hid it in her pant. Pretending I was passing by, I swiftly went for the remote from under her short gown and grabbed it. She didn't expect I knew where she hid it. She followed me behind and ceased the game console, second indication she wanted me to react. I do have a problem with my temper just like every human, male or female. I have also learnt to deal with it by walking away at times I feel I was going to lose it. The same reason I'm outside at this time, 9:55 pm Saudi time. She knows I have fought hard to tame my temper issues but most times, she makes deliberate efforts to have me overreact to her nags and rants.

I watched her hide the console in her pant yet again. I shuddered in obvious fear because I knew what the woman wanted, a fight. Unable to deal with it,the intimidation and the shame, I went for the console and squeezed it out from her hand while she was trying to hold it tight. That was when the trouble then started. She wanted a buffer to help her spill everything she had nursed in her mind. "You are a violent person!! You can kill, idiot!! You were not shown love by your parents, that is why you will squeeze your wife's hand to collect the console. They allowed you to grow up in the street without parental guidance and love." Then it came....pwaaaaaaah!!! She spat on my face!!!!! God knows, I have never been spat at before, not by my parents, not by my siblings, not by anybody. " I agree I was not shown love by my parents but your Dad is a coward for running away from your mother without being there for you guys when he needed to play his roles as a father. That explains the reason you are like this", I said and walked back to the seating room.

I managed to play a few games which I lost mostly and then slept off around past 5am this morning. Around 3pm, I woke up and went to the office. Not like I had work but I needed to clear my head away from the house. If only there was alcohol in Saudi, I would have been somewhere in a hotel drinking away the shame. When I returned home by past 7pm, hungry and tired. I needed to continue my game but I could no longer find the game console and the TV remote. I asked for it and she ignored me. I managed to eat and then left the house to this truck.

You see, I love my wife more than anything, more than anyone. She is one person in the whole world I could go any length for. I love her, that was why I forgave her when she broke up with me after I left Nigeria for Saudi Arabia. She broke up with me few months after I came to Saudi and started dating another guy twice her age. She says she never expected I would come back to her after she left me but I did. I did because I saw a future with her, a future I imagined, believed in and worked towards its reality. Today we have gotten to a level where most people out there would want to be, our colleagues envy is because they believe we are privileged and blessed but what they don't know is that in the truth, I have no peace. This marriage has become my legacy and my curse.

I want to send her back to Nigeria in few days time and I hope I'm not making a mistake!!! Spitting on my face, nah nah....am so fed up!!!!

nwamehn:
Since u confirmed right here that it can never happen to u, it means u can never be in the position to say what will be ur reaction if it happens to u, so how did u manage to be in the position to know that what the op is supposed to do is apologise since u have never imagined urself having such experience? U ar advising the op to apologise whereas u haven't even put urself in his shoes to know whether u will apologise or not. Very interesting. How then did u arrive at that ur advise of apology? Because I believe that before u can sincerely advise a man to do something in a particular situation, u would have put urself in the man's shoes to know whether u will do exactly what u advise him to do, otherwise ur advice will not be entirely sincere.

smellingmenses:
because hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

chuksbogus2001:
I don't know how Saudi deals men beating women .let me tell u when we were small my mum used to be very arrogant and rude to my dad cos he is a quiet man not until my mums mother I mean her own mum told my dad to beat her .After my dad gave her a better beating peace ,love respect came to our house since 1984 till now my mum has never raise her voice against my dad. Am not advocating women battery but a times small spanking does the magic

nwamehn:
So ur advice isn't based on the fact that u put urself in his shoes to know what would be the most sincere thing to do, but ur advise is based on the fact that there is an established rule somewhere that says that once a woman is ignored, she should go ahead and spit on the husband, insult the husband's parents and even kill him if necessary. What a wonderful adviser that u ar.
From our little discussion so far, I can see that u ar the type that would advise someone to do something without first putting urself in the person's shoes to know whether u will do same if u were him. Any sincere advise u ar giving somebody should be what u would have also given urself if u were him but here, u are not even sure whether u can give urself such an advise, so why giving it somebody else if it's really a good advise?
U said the op should apologise to the woman after she spat on him for ignoring her, when the question was now turned round and u were asked whether u would have apologised to her as u were advising the op if u were in his shoes, u picked race. U never answered that question up till now, yet u ar still insisting that op should apologise. Hahahaha. Some Nigerians sha, preaching what they can never practise. I bow for una.

Miladi:
Pauper go and eat before picking on me. Next time kindly direct your frustration towards your wretched parents.

People like you with lower IQ are only good in disparaging others who're miles away better than them intellectually in particular and in all good fronts, in general. I don't need an opinion of a foolish person like you before I can make my pronouncement on a subject under discussion.

Take note; I don't join issues with nincompoops.

smellingmenses:
if you so completely believe the Op then you must be a misigynitic view..... he is obviously lying, rationlising n reductionistic... that lady is not insane.... my conclusion...as a professional n a couple.

if he is a christian the bible admonishes christians to love the wives like Christ loved the church ...while wives should submit to the husbands.... precedingly.

am not gonna judge anyone in absentia never mba mba.... even a madman will not tell a tale to incriminate himself.... moreso you can pick holes in his tale.....

IYANGBALI:
Oga na you I blame o,koboko no dey for Saudi ni abi you no get belt to teach an sense? No be every woman man dey pamper o. If you let am know sey you get craze for head she go gentle and dey fear you. My own advice be sey make you give am second chance but try buy koboko keep for us and make you try to dey pretend to be mad man for am. Naija babe no dey respect gentle man o. Thank God sey you be Muslim, I go help you arrange another woman for here in case you go throway am come back to naija.

Rokiatu ajepako abimbawealth Juliaann VickyRotex Aminat508 Osusumustflow Edwife Mukina2 and notoriousbabe abeg make una be on standby. Horseband have come for Saudi God have answer your prayer,you are about to become Alhaja


Op dat part wey you talk sey she hide things inside her pant funny o,na everything she dey carry hide for pant?o ga o.

nwamehn:
My brother, u have said all these over and over again, the simple question I asked u from the very first post u haven't answered. Why are u dodging that simple question? I am not arguing with u whether the man or the woman did bigger wrong. I was only interested in @billyonaire's post because he said "apologise" and then u quoted me to say the girl can react anyhow. I then asked u, which I'm asking u again, if u were the man that didn't accompany ur wife for shopping for no reason, and u ignored her when she asked u a question playing FIFA, and u further dragged the remote from her, and because of that she insulted ur parents and spits on ur face, will u go back and apologise to her? Pls, answer me and don't dodge it this time around.

OsusuMustFlow:
you no well na

addictiv:
There is no shame in apologising at least for not following her to shop. Your woman is only responding to how you treat her.. I have read your post I see so many instances where you should have curtailed the situation but you let your attachment to an electronic gadget cloud your judgement. It was wrong of her to spit on you, which is a reaction what caused the reaction you ? Ignored her when you should have responded to her question about your router. If you are the one who was ignored am sure you would switch off the TV too. I have seen women who are literally lions to outsiders become sulking babies once they step foot into their home all because of how the man of the home treats them. You should be asking why she is acting out this way. Kicking her away won't solve your problem cos the next woman you meet will do the same thing if not worse if you treat her the same way.

Zedoo:
Welcome me to the world.

Husband beat wife, wife go stay because she no get self-belief to make ends meet outside the man pocket...most times....

Its better to slap the man than to spit on him

djbutterfly:
Why are you angry with God? What is that grudge you hold against him? Watch your mouth lest you fall into the worst depression you can't come out of. Ask judas!

OsusuMustFlow:
you no well na

IYANGBALI:
I well pass you jo

OsusuMustFlow:
you?

nameerfhtennek:
It's more than 20minutes, I'm still unable to put words together to begin this story. I will try keep it simple and necessarily detailed so everyone will understand the true picture of what happened, why against my belief that writing personal experiences on social media is immature, I had to still write mine. Let's just say I'm not thinking right now, maybe I'm so upset but truth is, I need your advice.

I'm writing this thread seated at the back of a Hilux truck just outside our apartment. Yaa, that me in the picture. You see, today is EID and believe me I should be resting in the house since I'm not working today. Days like this only come by 6times in a whole year and more than anything, I would have loved resting than being out here.

It was yesterday evening, she called and said she her driver were headed to my office. She wanted to pick some stuffs around my office. Yaa, I forgot to say this is Saudi Arabia. If you know Saudi quite well, you will agree with me that a husband will definitely get exhausted running errands for his wife or the family. I was not in the mood for shopping but she wanted to shop. She got upset that I didn't want to accompany her shopping.

She did her shopping alone and returned few minutes before I closed from work. We headed home. Unknown to me, I forgot my internet router in my office because I was rushing to get home and continue with my FIFA 16.
Her internet service expired some days back so we were using mine.

While playing game, she walked into the seating room and demanded for my router. Mine, not hers. With her tone and facial expression demanding the router, I didn't respond because there was an indication that she was warming up for a quarrel. I wasn't just in the mood. The thing is, she is very skilled in extending her anger phases. That is one thing I can't understand till today. Believe me, it was not like this while we were dating. Sorry, I forgot to tell you I married my university girlfriend, she years my junior and the same department. Ya, I'm one of those guys that dated and planned for the future with their girls at the same time. God blessed that plan but at this point I don't understand everything that has been happening for the past one year plus since we got married. She repeatedly demanded that I handed over my router to her but I was quiet. Meanwhile, it occurred to me that I forgot the router in my office the minute she first asked about it. Truth is, I actually needed to use the internet that night for my online FIFA.

After several times of asking for the router and no response from me, she took the TV remote and switched off the TV. She walked straight to the kitchen and hid the remote. I approached her in the kitchen and told her I was not ready for any kinda quarrel. We have had enough for the past one year of getting married. I then told her I forgot the router in my office, I didn't have it. I guess she didn't believe me, she never did. She told me to leave her alone. I returned back to the seating room with my heart beating fast. I knew she wanted a serious quarrel that night. After some minutes, I returned to the kitchen and requested for the remote. Then I figured out she hid it in her pant. Pretending I was passing by, I swiftly went for the remote from under her short gown and grabbed it. She didn't expect I knew where she hid it. She followed me behind and ceased the game console, second indication she wanted me to react. I do have a problem with my temper just like every human, male or female. I have also learnt to deal with it by walking away at times I feel I was going to lose it. The same reason I'm outside at this time, 9:55 pm Saudi time. She knows I have fought hard to tame my temper issues but most times, she makes deliberate efforts to have me overreact to her nags and rants.

I watched her hide the console in her pant yet again. I shuddered in obvious fear because I knew what the woman wanted, a fight. Unable to deal with it,the intimidation and the shame, I went for the console and squeezed it out from her hand while she was trying to hold it tight. That was when the trouble then started. She wanted a buffer to help her spill everything she had nursed in her mind. "You are a violent person!! You can kill, idiot!! You were not shown love by your parents, that is why you will squeeze your wife's hand to collect the console. They allowed you to grow up in the street without parental guidance and love." Then it came....pwaaaaaaah!!! She spat on my face!!!!! God knows, I have never been spat at before, not by my parents, not by my siblings, not by anybody. " I agree I was not shown love by my parents but your Dad is a coward for running away from your mother without being there for you guys when he needed to play his roles as a father. That explains the reason you are like this", I said and walked back to the seating room.

I managed to play a few games which I lost mostly and then slept off around past 5am this morning. Around 3pm, I woke up and went to the office. Not like I had work but I needed to clear my head away from the house. If only there was alcohol in Saudi, I would have been somewhere in a hotel drinking away the shame. When I returned home by past 7pm, hungry and tired. I needed to continue my game but I could no longer find the game console and the TV remote. I asked for it and she ignored me. I managed to eat and then left the house to this truck.

You see, I love my wife more than anything, more than anyone. She is one person in the whole world I could go any length for. I love her, that was why I forgave her when she broke up with me after I left Nigeria for Saudi Arabia. She broke up with me few months after I came to Saudi and started dating another guy twice her age. She says she never expected I would come back to her after she left me but I did. I did because I saw a future with her, a future I imagined, believed in and worked towards its reality. Today we have gotten to a level where most people out there would want to be, our colleagues envy is because they believe we are privileged and blessed but what they don't know is that in the truth, I have no peace. This marriage has become my legacy and my curse.

I want to send her back to Nigeria in few days time and I hope I'm not making a mistake!!! Spitting on my face, nah nah....am so fed up!!!!

chuksbogus2001:
I don't know how Saudi deals men beating women .let me tell u when we were small my mum used to be very arrogant and rude to my dad cos he is a quiet man not until my mums mother I mean her own mum told my dad to beat her .After my dad gave her a better beating peace ,love respect came to our house since 1984 till now my mum has never raise her voice against my dad. Am not advocating women battery but a times small spanking does the magic