If you take the dedication to another church is it not the same God you want to dedicate your child to?
You broke the rules and regulations guilding your church and you don't want to serve the punishment simply because you believe that God has already forgiven you? How convenient it is for you. If you have truly repented you will accept the church's decision just like your husband without complaining. I'm sure you are fully aware that God hates disobedience.

When a child born out of wedlock is openly dedicated in church it sends a wrong signal to other members of the church. Tomorrow some members will deliberately break the rule and expect the church to celebrate their ill action. You can go to another church where morality has been thrown to the wind no wahala. If some churches can wed a heavily pregnant lady then dedicating a child born out of wedlock is too easy for them.

greatgod2012:
Cancel the dedication!

Open or private dedication do not have anything to do with what God has in stock for you and your child!


Personally, I can't stand the shame and humiliation attached to that church conditions, even after the child is over six months. If churches can not grant complete forgiveness and love, why is it called church then!


My personl opinion please!

I totally agree with u!!!!!

What kind of church is that??
Abeg, leave the church before they will forever remind you that you got pregnant out of wedlock..

Why are you devastated. Why do want to create problems for yourself and your baby where there is none. From your write up I perceive you are a born again believer, as such never say such things as am devastated over issues like this.
If the church days have a private blessing, I advise you to gladly accept it and go in there with a graceful heart to your God and he will accept you and bless your baby more than some who have an open dedication that may not have been accepted by God.
You have no problems. Obey the church and have it.

TinaAnita:
If you take the dedication to another church is it not the same God you want to dedicate your child to?
You broke the rules and regulations guilding your church and you don't want to serve the punishment simply because you believe that God has already forgiven you? How convenient it is for you. If you have truly repented you will accept the church's decision just like your husband without complaining. I'm sure you are fully aware that God hates disobedience.

When a child born out of wedlock is openly dedicated in church it sends a wrong signal to other members of the church. Tomorrow some members will deliberately break the rule and expect the church to celebrate their ill action. You can go to another church where morality has been thrown to the wind no wahala. If some churches can wed a heavily pregnant lady then dedicating a child born out of wedlock is too easy for them.

I don't get?? What is wrong with dedicating a child concrived out of wedlock?? Is it the child's fault??

The only law I know that holds water is "the church wouldn't Wed you if u re pregnant" but go as far as saying u cant dedicate the child openly?? Hian!! Before you know it, the poor boy will be discriminated upon for the rest of his life. they better change church before it's too late.

What then do Christians call love??

Livie2016:
Hello,

Would really appreciate some words of advice please. I'm really sad. No judgmental posts posse.

I conceived my first child when I was dating my boyfriend, now husband and then we got married shortly after I fell pregnant. We had planned to get married even before I got pregnant but when I got pregnant, we then decided to bring the date forward. It was a very difficult period for me because my mum really made me feel bad. I repented to God from a heart of genuine sincerity and sought his forgiveness which I received by his grace. I fell short of the glory of God but God forgave me and had mercy on me.

Fast forward to a year plus after my wedding. My son is now 6 months and we would like to dedicate him in church. We have however been told that the church will not accept him for the regular dedication process where the parents dance out to the front of the church alongside close relatives and friends. What the church has said is that we can only do a private dedication service in a different room after the service. I'm devastated.


My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act but God has forgiven us. I've now been happily married to my husband and father of my child for more than a year. Is it therefore fair for the church to treat my son like he's an outcast and not worthy of being celebrated openly and publicly?


I feel so humiliated and wanted to cancel the dedication and do it in a church where h will be openly celebrated and received as a wonderful gift from God which my darling son is. My husband has accepted it but I'm struggling to do so. The church is supposed to be about love. What is the biblical basis for saying that my son cannot be pubclily dedicated?


Would really like some views here. Should I cancel the dedication and do it somewhere else or go ahead with the private/ secret dedication?

Many thanks for reading.

And u still call it ur church, na ur father get am? Leave dt church already BC they will remind u ur past forever.
God has forgiven u but ur church won't what kinda nonsense church is dt

Medunah:

I don't get?? What is wrong with dedicating a child concrived out of wedlock?? Is it the child's fault??

The only law I know that hold waters is "the church wouldn't Wed you if u re pregnant" but go as far as saying u cant dedicate the child openly?? Hian!! Before you know it, the poor boy will be discriminated upon for the rest of his life. they better change church before it's too late.

What then do Christians call love??

Dedicating a product of fornication is one sure way to support and encourage fornication and before you know it other defaulters would expect the same nice treatment

So dedicating a product of fornication doesn't mean anything to you? my dear leave the issue of love. What is wrong is wrong and what has to be done has to be done. It is what it is. Love and forgiveness are not enough reason for one not to serve certain punishment so as to serve as a deterrent to others

In my humble opinion, the child should be brought to the alter for dedication, while the parents should remain seated in the congregation. This kills two birds with one stone, as it ensures that the child receives a proper dedication and serves as a deterrent to others.

TinaAnita:


So dedicating a product of fornication doesn't mean anything to you? my dear leave the issue of love. What is wrong is wrong and what has to be done has to be done. It is what it is. Love and forgiveness are not enough reason for one not to serve certain punishment so as to serve as a deterrent to others

Is it the baby's fault he came that way?? I can't even believe you would refer to him as at??
I was right, she should change church cos that boy would be treated as that for the rest of his life in that church......

No dedication at all sef is better.....dedicate him In private against the parent's will because?? The baby is now a shame or what?? What will now happen to the kids born out of wedlock??

Op u've done more harm than good to your son, am sure with this your recent new vexing many that are not aware on how your son came about know now and guess what they will use it against him later so to u now the real vex is coming when your son start confronting u.

Livie2016:
Hello,

Would really appreciate some words of advice please. I'm really sad. No judgmental posts posse.

I conceived my first child when I was dating my boyfriend, now husband and then we got married shortly after I fell pregnant. We had planned to get married even before I got pregnant but when I got pregnant, we then decided to bring the date forward. It was a very difficult period for me because my mum really made me feel bad. I repented to God from a heart of genuine sincerity and sought his forgiveness which I received by his grace. I fell short of the glory of God but God forgave me and had mercy on me.

Fast forward to a year plus after my wedding. My son is now 6 months and we would like to dedicate him in church. We have however been told that the church will not accept him for the regular dedication process where the parents dance out to the front of the church alongside close relatives and friends. What the church has said is that we can only do a private dedication service in a different room after the service. I'm devastated.


My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act but God has forgiven us. I've now been happily married to my husband and father of my child for more than a year. Is it therefore fair for the church to treat my son like he's an outcast and not worthy of being celebrated openly and publicly?


I feel so humiliated and wanted to cancel the dedication and do it in a church where h will be openly celebrated and received as a wonderful gift from God which my darling son is. My husband has accepted it but I'm struggling to do so. The church is supposed to be about love. What is the biblical basis for saying that my son cannot be pubclily dedicated?


Would really like some views here. Should I cancel the dedication and do it somewhere else or go ahead with the private/ secret dedication?

Many thanks for reading.

Let me ask, if you go to another church, will you tell the pastor that you had sex and got pregnant before marriage?

Nobody is subjecting this child to anything. You are pained bc you have been denied the opportunity to do your own public show and nyanga. Fall in line or fall out.

Move on

lazeal:
People attach importance to unnecessary things. Na backyard dem born, for ground as my mother was visiting a her sister. Just few blocks away from the sister's house, she had me. There was nothing like child dedication on me lol.

Now I remember you....
You have grown so big. Wow

Livie2016:
Hello,

Would really appreciate some words of advice please. I'm really sad. No judgmental posts posse.

I conceived my first child when I was dating my boyfriend, now husband and then we got married shortly after I fell pregnant. We had planned to get married even before I got pregnant but when I got pregnant, we then decided to bring the date forward. It was a very difficult period for me because my mum really made me feel bad. I repented to God from a heart of genuine sincerity and sought his forgiveness which I received by his grace. I fell short of the glory of God but God forgave me and had mercy on me.

Fast forward to a year plus after my wedding. My son is now 6 months and we would like to dedicate him in church. We have however been told that the church will not accept him for the regular dedication process where the parents dance out to the front of the church alongside close relatives and friends. What the church has said is that we can only do a private dedication service in a different room after the service. I'm devastated.


My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act but God has forgiven us. I've now been happily married to my husband and father of my child for more than a year. Is it therefore fair for the church to treat my son like he's an outcast and not worthy of being celebrated openly and publicly?


I feel so humiliated and wanted to cancel the dedication and do it in a church where h will be openly celebrated and received as a wonderful gift from God which my darling son is. My husband has accepted it but I'm struggling to do so. The church is supposed to be about love. What is the biblical basis for saying that my son cannot be pubclily dedicated?


Would really like some views here. Should I cancel the dedication and do it somewhere else or go ahead with the private/ secret dedication?

Many thanks for reading.

Good morning.

I have read your writeup, and I want to say thank you for raising this matter.

I would like to begin, in time honored Nigerian fashion (as usual) with a question.

Why do you want a public dedication?

Is it to glorify God, or is it to show off your baby and yourself to the entire church as being a mother?

Is it to get God's approval or to get the approval and the admiring stares of the Church members and Society at the fact of your becoming a mother?

Is it to celebrate God or to celebrate your being a mom?

Jesus was not big on public displays. He said in the Bible....

And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their reward. But when you pray, go into your inner room, shut your door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen. And your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. Matthew 6 vs 5-6.

Because, that is what dedicating a baby is all about....handing it back to God...not making a big show of it so that everyone can see you have become a mother.


Second question....well, it is from you.

Why should the church be disciplining you again for a mistake you and your husband made...and after you have repented too?

The reason is that the Church's responsibilty is to see its members grow in Christ. And the sad thing is that not all the members of the body of Christ are at the same level of maturity. So, holding a public dedication of your baby might send a message to weaker members of the church that it is ''ok to have sex outside of marriage since the church blessed sister K's child who was concieved out of wedlock''...

AsPaul said....

Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to stumble, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to stumble...1 Cor 8 vs 13.

The Church has a duty to see that its members do not fall into sin...hence the decision.

So, instead of focusing on the dissapointment of not having a public dedication, focus instead on what God has already done for you...because in the end, His opinion matters more than any gossipy and funny talking church member who would want to condemm you further for having your baby out of wedlock.

God bless.

TinaAnita:


Dedicating a product of fornication is one sure way to support and encourage fornication and before you know it other defaulters would expect the same nice treatment

So dedicating a product of fornication doesn't mean anything to you? my dear leave the issue of love. What is wrong is wrong and what has to be done has to be done. It is what it is. Love and forgiveness are not enough reason for one not to serve certain punishment so as to serve as a deterrent to others

See this virgin.

Continue

MurderX:
My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act

This awfully ridiculous. If you already condemned the child then u dont have a right to blame the church. Please your child was born of a purely natural process designed by the creator. Celebrate that beautiful creature..

thanks for that. first, we should ask, what is child's dedication? should there be any for of dedicating a child to God, No. Children are gifts​ from God. not from any man, or church. so, why would the church decide a secret dedication. besides, they are legally married. the child was born in a family. that means, this particular church has condemned the baby all his life. he can never have open celebration in that church.
if you sleep with a virgin, God does not condemn you as a man or woman. just do the needful, pay his bride price and marry her. Ex 22:16.

the church has no power rejecting a child God has blessed a family with. you can decide not to wed a pregnant woman, but dedicating a child, no. it shouldn't be

why dedicate a child in secret 2 d lord.japhter was an illegitimate child but d lord use him exceedingly.

Medunah:

Is it the baby's fault he came that way?? I can't even believe you would refer to him as at??
I was right, she should change church cos that boy would be treated as that for the rest of his life in that church......

No dedication at all sef is better.....dedicate him In private against the parent's will because?? The baby is now a shame or what?? What will now happen to the kids born out of wedlock??

There are loads of churches that will gladly accept her request without giving a hoot of the circumstances surrounding the birth of the child as they aren't interested in observing any protocols.

She is free to go to another church and trust me when I say her present church has nothing to lose. She likes publicity a lot, she can't do without dancing to the altar for all eyes to see that she has put to bed, that's her major priority judging from her write-up so who am I to kick against that? I laugh

thorpido:
King David sinned in the bible,took another man's wife and caused the husband's death.The woman conceived but the child became sick.David prayed and fasted for the child to be well.God let the child die.God forgave David but the child still died.
When you ask what bible are they reading to guide their members,be sure you have read the contents yourself.

So should the baby die (or become afflicted) because the parents conceived before their wedding ? Your comment above is one of the problems I have with Christians and muslims , you guys rarely think deep and become illogical the moment religion comes in. Was it even proper for the christian god to let an innocent child die? What a merciful god! As a father/mother would you allow your grandson to die of malaria without treatment just because the father(your son) had him outside wedlock? Should your grandson be punished/afflicted/allowed to die because he is a product of his father's randy relationships?

Livie2016:
Hello,

Would really appreciate some words of advice please. I'm really sad. No judgmental posts posse.

I conceived my first child when I was dating my boyfriend, now husband and then we got married shortly after I fell pregnant. We had planned to get married even before I got pregnant but when I got pregnant, we then decided to bring the date forward. It was a very difficult period for me because my mum really made me feel bad. I repented to God from a heart of genuine sincerity and sought his forgiveness which I received by his grace. I fell short of the glory of God but God forgave me and had mercy on me.

Fast forward to a year plus after my wedding. My son is now 6 months and we would like to dedicate him in church. We have however been told that the church will not accept him for the regular dedication process where the parents dance out to the front of the church alongside close relatives and friends. What the church has said is that we can only do a private dedication service in a different room after the service. I'm devastated.


My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act but God has forgiven us. I've now been happily married to my husband and father of my child for more than a year. Is it therefore fair for the church to treat my son like he's an outcast and not worthy of being celebrated openly and publicly?


I feel so humiliated and wanted to cancel the dedication and do it in a church where h will be openly celebrated and received as a wonderful gift from God which my darling son is. My husband has accepted it but I'm struggling to do so. The church is supposed to be about love. What is the biblical basis for saying that my son cannot be pubclily dedicated?


Would really like some views here. Should I cancel the dedication and do it somewhere else or go ahead with the private/ secret dedication?

Many thanks for reading.

That's not a church na. Na .court where judgement is passed.

You need to know that your Child was not conceived from a sinful act.

Your child was conceived from a loving act,from two adults who loves themselves and had consentual sex resulting to the birth of a child,and are now married to each other.

It's not as if her church refused to dedicate the baby, they agreed to dedicate him but not publicly so that it won't send a wrong signal to other members of the church. Try to understand the church is trying to avoid. Dedicating the baby devoid of much publicity won't change anything, the mother is just the one making a mountain out of a molehill.

Money answers all things now o.
You should have made it a matter of private discussion between you and the church pastor, then give him money and see whether the child wont be dedicated openly.
Look, Senate rejected Ibrahim Magu confirmation as EFCC chairman because the presidency didnt lobby for him. Same with your son's dedication, you are yet to lobby for it very well.

Livie2016:
Hello,

Would really appreciate some words of advice please. I'm really sad. No judgmental posts posse.

I conceived my first child when I was dating my boyfriend, now husband and then we got married shortly after I fell pregnant. We had planned to get married even before I got pregnant but when I got pregnant, we then decided to bring the date forward. It was a very difficult period for me because my mum really made me feel bad. I repented to God from a heart of genuine sincerity and sought his forgiveness which I received by his grace. I fell short of the glory of God but God forgave me and had mercy on me.

Fast forward to a year plus after my wedding. My son is now 6 months and we would like to dedicate him in church. We have however been told that the church will not accept him for the regular dedication process where the parents dance out to the front of the church alongside close relatives and friends. What the church has said is that we can only do a private dedication service in a different room after the service. I'm devastated.


My son is innocent and pure. He was conceived from a sinful act but God has forgiven us. I've now been happily married to my husband and father of my child for more than a year. Is it therefore fair for the church to treat my son like he's an outcast and not worthy of being celebrated openly and publicly?


I feel so humiliated and wanted to cancel the dedication and do it in a church where h will be openly celebrated and received as a wonderful gift from God which my darling son is. My husband has accepted it but I'm struggling to do so. The church is supposed to be about love. What is the biblical basis for saying that my son cannot be pubclily dedicated?


Would really like some views here. Should I cancel the dedication and do it somewhere else or go ahead with the private/ secret dedication?

Many thanks for reading.

Are you really a Christian? I ask because I see you placing too much emphasis on dancing to the front of the church and child dedication. Are those requirements for making heaven? Is that your main reason for attending church? As a child of God why bring an issue that happened in your father's house to an open forum where most do not share the same parenthood with you? Will you do that with issues affecting your earthly family? I think you need to go back to God in repentance and ask Him to purge you of every form of carnality. And to those who may wish to castigate me for this post, understand that this advice is not directed at you but at the op.

Is the church not meant for Sinners,whats all this dedication stuff about,if ur son not dedicated,will he still not die wen his time comes or does dedication prolong lifespan,My sister,think about your soul and ur son's salvation(baptism) and don't let all this human tradition bother u

TinaAnita:
If you take the dedication to another church is it not the same God you want to dedicate your child to?
You broke the rules and regulations guilding your church and you don't want to serve the punishment simply because you believe that God has already forgiven you? How convenient it is for you. If you have truly repented you will accept the church's decision just like your husband without complaining. I'm sure you are fully aware that God hates disobedience.

When a child born out of wedlock is openly dedicated in church it sends a wrong signal to other members of the church. Tomorrow some members will deliberately break the rule and expect the church to celebrate their ill action. You can go to another church where morality has been thrown to the wind no wahala. If some churches can wed a heavily pregnant lady then dedicating a child born out of wedlock is too easy for them.

kudos dear
that lady appears to be a trouble maker and she is just about creating one for her child. the more noise she makes on this issue, the more she reminds everyone that her baby was born out of wedlock.

All this churches and doctrines. .......are u trying to punish the child or the parents...

Every child is a gift and creation of GOD. There are ways of punishment for the parents within the church structure. .......maybe they will not be able to serve in the church structure. ......

It is you guys that sinned and not the child......

It once happened in my church years back.....the lady was already pregnant when the wedding was conducted. .......so when the child was born. ....the church elders calculated that the child was born 2 months early. The baby was still dedicated and the parents were given a date to come and stand before the whole church, they apologised and they knelt down and the pastor prayed for them ......and the matter ended there......

He who has not sinned before let him cast the first stone...

I don't even get the idea behind baby dedication. I thought worship was supposed to be voluntary. So why dedicate a baby that has no clue what is happening?

When God gave me my son in that circumstance too.in the delivery room that night,I lift up my son to God ,bless my son,prayed for him and dedicate him to God even before any pastor prayed for him.if u still want to dedicate your child in a church.take him to another church

Rules are rules and are meant to ensure order. After all there is a saying that "order is the first law in Heaven". Its your own cross and we as believers have been admonished to carry our crosses ,whatever they are. It comes in different forms. Dedication is more or a social thing these days. If a pastor does it in any location, the bottom line is the child has been dedicated. I have a colleague of mine who decided to do her dedication privately on a working day. She just left the office during break to the church and in less than 2 hours she was back at work. Case closed. Baby dedicated!!!

kevoh:

So should the baby die (or become afflicted) because the parents conceived before their wedding ? Your comment above is one of the problems I have with Christians and muslims , you guys rarely think deep and become illogical the moment religion comes in. Was it even proper for the christian god to let an innocent child die? What a merciful god! As a father/mother would you allow your grandson to die of malaria without treatment just because the father(your son) had him outside wedlock? Should your grandson be punished/afflicted/allowed to die because he is a product of his father's randy relationships?

You do not understand the concept of sin.
David's example doesn't apply to everyone but was his own punishment.
Talking about thinking deep and illogical,the ways of God are far beyond man's logical reasoning.

TinaAnita:


Dedicating a product of fornication is one sure way to support and encourage fornication and before you know it other defaulters would expect the same nice treatment

So dedicating a product of fornication doesn't mean anything to you? my dear leave the issue of love. What is wrong is wrong and what has to be done has to be done. It is what it is. Love and forgiveness are not enough reason for one not to serve certain punishment so as to serve as a deterrent to others

a product of fornication? Wow! Religion has messed you guys up in your hypocritical heads.

Swear on your life that you are a virgin, because you are unmarried. Or is it better to abort the child?

LadyB1195:

Never knew a church is a Institute.
Ask yourself why a church was made in the first place.

Well check the dictionary for the meaning of institute.

Mind telling me why a church was made in the first place?