₦airaland Forum

There's fairness in equality and equality doesn't negate first among equals philosophy. I've no regret being an egalitarian.

I love real feminists because they understand the importance of fairness and by extension they know that there's something like first among equals in marriage or any other romantic affair. And of course, at work place or any other public affairs, the best and most prepared automatically assumes first among equals role, irrespective of gender.

However, I loathe wannabe feminists because they always misconstrue what feminism is all about - they're not just misandrists but also oppressive. They aren't different from misogynists or oppressive men.

A typical oppressive man would always mistake submissiveness for servitude and as such expects the latter from his wife always. So also, an oppressive woman would always take or try to take advantage of her man's loyalty to mete out all sorts of shenanigans towards him.

I've neither regards for misogynists/oppressive men nor misandrists/oppressive women - these classes of people sees loyalty as a sign of weakness. I doff my hat for all fairness proponents and practitioners while extending my utmost respect to all goodness proponents and practitioners.

nairaland version of feminists is a collection of heartbroken, fvcked-and-dumped jobless girls between 18 - 33. the few married ones among them are helpless puppets in their homes and slaves to their husbands; they don't have a job... all they do is sit at home, prepare food for their family, get pregnant and give birth. but they've successfully carried their frustration to nairaland to warn, and as well mislead, the younger ones how not to end up like them. check their time-in and timeout, it's usually 6am to 6pm, the time oga leaves home and returns from work.

FTrebirth:
nairaland version of feminists is a collection of heartbroken, fvcked-and-dumped jobless girls between 18 - 33. the few married ones among them are helpless puppets in their homes and slaves to their husbands; they don't have a job... all they do is sit at home, prepare food for their family, get pregnant and give birth. but they've successfully carried their frustration to nairaland to, warn and as well, mislead, the younger ones how not to end up like them. check their time-in and timeout, it's usually 6am to 6pm, the time oga leaves home and returns from work.

oh lawd. you are wicked. what a blow to the guts. but it's not a lie sha.

I actually lost some IQ points just by reading the poppycock on this thread.

SINZ:
OP, the earlier you realise that these nairaland "feminists" are nothi g but pained 17-24 year old's who started "doing bad things" a very tender age and ended up being used and dumped more times than Pampers, the better for you.

Nairaland is the only place they claim to be feminists. Outside here, they are humble as fûck!

oh my God
You are killing me

FTrebirth:
nairaland version of feminists is a collection of heartbroken, fvcked-and-dumped jobless girls between 18 - 33. the few married ones among them are helpless puppets in their homes and slaves to their husbands; they don't have a job... all they do is sit at home, prepare food for their family, get pregnant and give birth. but they've successfully carried their frustration to nairaland to, warn and as well, mislead, the younger ones how not to end up like them. check their time-in and timeout, it's usually 6am to 6pm, the time oga leaves home and returns from work.

oh lord of mercy
I have never seen something so beautifully written, yet packed with just the right punch to land a knock out blow

I love this writer... permission to copy sir!

Gender equality is good, but the downside judging by the Sweden I live which tops the list of feminism, is that the women here eventually are jumping ship to find real men across the border for casual sex or long term relationship from men who still live in a country not ridden by feminism.

I have one time listed all the countries these women travel to for sex and the striking thing is that not one of these countries represents any feminist agenda.....Ecuador, Cuba, Gambia, Turkey, The Carribeans, Jamaica etc...I am talking of slim hot blonde and blue eyed beautiful women, so I'm still wondering why do they prefer macho egoistic men to the effeminate submissive men they created, maybe at the end of the day biological desires trump social economic wants.

https://www.thelocal.se/20040907/371

Amarabae:
@bolded.
Are you joking? Look at Africa, since black men are ruling and leading it, why is it backward both pre and post colonial?
The black society is in a mess because the black man is failing the black community.
Accept your fault pls.
And who told you women can't raise men?
A single woman raised Ben caster the famous doctor and many others.
I am not promoting a broken home or single parenting but to tell you that women can raise A Full Successful MAN.
Ok?
Feminism is not a Man vs Woman concept but rather a movement to empower women.

Empower them with what exactly?

HumanistMike:
I used reverse psychology to get you to read it and it worked with 100% accuracy. It's a no brainer.

You may now get lost. I'm done having you used!

Boss

FTrebirth:
nairaland version of feminists is a collection of heartbroken, fvcked-and-dumped jobless girls between 18 - 33. the few married ones among them are helpless puppets in their homes and slaves to their husbands; they don't have a job... all they do is sit at home, prepare food for their family, get pregnant and give birth. but they've successfully carried their frustration to nairaland to, warn and as well, mislead, the younger ones how not to end up like them. check their time-in and timeout, it's usually 6am to 6pm, the time oga leaves home and returns from work.

#ItsNotAlie

sunshineG:
oh lord of mercy
I have never seen something so beautifully written, yet packed with just the right punch to land a knock out blow

As in eh

olaboy1:
Gender equality is good, but the downside judging by the Sweden I live which tops the list of feminism, is that the women here eventually are jumping ship to find real men across the border for casual sex or long term relationship from men who still live in a country not ridden by feminism.

I have one time listed all the countries these women travel to for sex and the striking thing is that not one of these countries represents any feminist agenda.....Ecuador, Cuba, Gambia, Turkey, The Carribeans, Jamaica etc...I am talking of slim hot blonde and blue eyed beautiful women, so I'm still wondering why do they prefer macho egoistic men to the effeminate submissive men they created, maybe at the end of the day biological desires trump social economic wants.

https://www.thelocal.se/20040907/371

You couldn't be more correct

DarkRebel69:
I actually lost some IQ points just by reading the poppycock on this thread.

Funny you, bless us with your wisdom Sir.

I'm appalled at the constant need to lord over another, leading to this constant bickering. If there are women that see the need to contest the position of a man as the head of the home _ they should have their heads checked.

There is a difference between knowing and understanding a cause and being a sheep. Most fall into the category of sheep. Blind followers with no concept of the origin of the ideology. To me there is no difference between wannabe feminists and fanatics. Both are toxic and dangerous. They take certain aspects and then feed others a very misconstrued version of what feminism is . Based on some of the comments this seems to be the case. For example " if my wife starts to talk about feminism i will kick her out!" Right there that's the problem because if the wife understood feminism she would not just bring it up! The wife hijacked an ideology. The hand me down, she said or I heard those are the worst type as most are make belief. True lies if you will.

Feminism was never about reassignments of the sexes It was about and still is equal opportunity and access. Sending your son to school but not your daughter on the basis that she is a girl. Not being able to apply for a particular job because you are a woman therefore the view should do you meet all the requirements regardless of sex! The soul of the movement was and still is about social equality, access and opportunity.

Never was it about trying to realign clear biological differences. Men and women are not the same. Society and culture evolve that's something no one can stop. What was acceptable during the era of my grandfathers does not mean it should exist without being challenged. Social & cultural Norms should not be at the detriment of one party.

If you are a forward thinking man , send both sons and daughters to school, advocate for their development, wrote a will that included all your children not just your sons, do not advocate for the marriage of your prepubescent girls to men old enough to be their fathers, occasionally cook at home, share the housework, look after the children to give your wife rest, comfort your woman when she has labour pains. Never rise your hand when angered.
You are a Feminist in its pure

You are very confused if you start competing with your own husband for the role of husband. That said it does not mean treat your wife like chattel. Knowledge is what frees the mind. A person can be knowledgeably ignorant and that is a woman's worst enemy not Feminism.

A lot of you are feminist without you knowing, if you believe women should have access to education, vote, treated fairly and not discriminated then congratulations you are a feminist, though I would never call myself that however it goes haywire from here, today's feminism are just a bunch of radicals and misandrist and to be sincere feminism in Nigeria seems almost impractical except in the north and places where women are denied right, as of currently no one denies women from doing anything they want to, and as for the gender pay gap myth I don't actually believe in that, today's feminist movement just things to be relaxed for them all in the name of being a woman and benefits. I also don't think Nigerian women can be feminist because that means treated equally as a man, a lot of them would crack under that, it means no more special treatment. Generally feminism is not bad what you see today is not feminism but radicals.

PaperLace:
Funny you, bless us with your wisdom Sir.

I'm appalled at the constant need to lord another leading to this constant bickering. If there are women that see the need to contest the position of a man as the head of the home _ they should have their heads checked.

Sarcasm?

DarkRebel69:
Sarcasm?

No .

pocohantas:
Lots of you men see nothing wrong in claiming superior to women, then you are crying because women say they are equal, not superior o. Haba... you guys should strike a balance na

Go for the unfeminised female then. It's that simple...

sorry, God said, the woman shall be under the man( doesn't mean she's inferior)
This should end all this argument,gender cannot and never be equal,,gender marginalization should be what the so called feminists be fighting for nd not gender equality, you can't be equal to the man, eve first sinned and God made it like that, if u hve any problem with that, contact God

MissRaine69:
There is a difference between knowing and understanding a cause and being a sheep. Most fall into the category of sheep. Blind followers with no concept of the origin of the ideology. To me there is no difference between wannabe feminists and fanatics. Both are toxic and dangerous. They take certain aspects and then feed others a very misconstrued version of what feminism is . Based on some of the comments this seems to be the case. For example " if my wife starts to talk about feminism i will kick her out!" Right there that's the problem because if the wife understood feminism she would not just bring it up! The wife hijacked an ideology. The hand me down, she said or I heard those are the worst type as most are make belief. True lies if you will.

Feminism was never about reassignments of the sexes It was about and still is equal opportunity and access. Sending your son to school but not your daughter on the basis that she is a girl. Not being able to apply for a particular job because you are a woman therefore the view should do you meet all the requirements regardless of sex! The soul of the movement was and still is about social equality, access and opportunity.

Never was it about trying to realign clear biological differences. Men and women are not the same. Society and culture evolve that's something no one can stop. What was acceptable during the era of my grandfathers does not mean it should exist without being challenged. Social & cultural Norms should not be at the detriment of one party.

If you are a forward thinking man , send both sons and daughters to school, advocate for their development, wrote a will that included all your children not just your sons, do not advocate for the marriage of your prepubescent girls to men old enough to be their fathers, occasionally cook at home, share the housework, look after the children to give your wife rest, comfort your woman when she has labour pains. Never rise your hand when angered.
You are a Feminist in its pure

You are very confused if you start competing with your own husband for the role of husband. That said it does not mean treat your wife like chattel. Knowledge is what frees the mind. A person can be knowledgeably ignorant and that is a woman's worst enemy not Feminism.

if this is what. Ladies take feminism to mean,i don't think any reasonable guy will have problems with it
Nice one,,atleast u have sense

bpee:
sorry, God said, the woman shall be under the man( doesn't mean she's inferior)
This should end all this argument,gender cannot and never be equal,,gender marginalization should be what the so called feminists be fighting for nd not gender equality, you can't be equal to the man, eve first sinned and God made it like that, if u hve any problem with that, contact God

My future husband is above me.
My father is...
My brothers...fine.
If I have a male boss, by virtue of leadership, he is superior.

But if you think every man out there, including the useless ones, rapist, paedophiles, kidnappers, ritualists...etc, are above me, because they have prick, that would never be possible.

Apart from family and professional heads, every other prick has to earn it. That includes women, they have to earn the respect they seek. This has nothing to do with feminism.

why there is feminism is that the women know that they being inferior to men is the truth.
why is there no masculinism too?

I'm never equal to a woman abeg!!!

PaperLace:
No .

If you're looking to see my take on the issue, then I shall give you an abridged version of a notion I've always upheld: In theory, everybody deserves to be treated with dignity, and in equal measure, too–regardless of their sex, age, or social status; and if in practice the inverse is the case, then it's only a "social deformity" that has been afforded an appearance of normalcy due to it having being in place for a long tract of time. We often mistake "longetivity and tradition" for "properness". If that were the case, then perhaps we should give up trying to combat corruption in Nigeria since the practice of corruption has been a long-standing tradition amongst our public officials. Nonsensical thinking, right?

And, most importantly, no reality is backed up by some divine or higher power - that's only the sort of rubbish you'd hear from hyper-religious fanatics who've elected to abdicate all rigours of reasoning to some invisible, and probably "inexistent" otherwordly entity.

What is reality is only reality because we willed it so, but that doesn't mean every facet of reality is impeccable and without flaws. In Koma hills (Adamawa state), it was once their reality to 'butcher twins" and to "swap wives/husbands", but that reality today has been displaced.

I've promised myself to refrain from topics of this nature, 'cause asides from it being a time-waster, I understand now that many people on this forum are close-minded and unprogressive. Each person should stick with his/her ideology and act it out in the manner he/she wishes off the internet. Enough with the fire-brand evangelism of ideologies, it doesn't seem to have any effect anyway besides expanding the gulf of animosity between the parties involved.

pocohantas:
My future husband is above me.
My father is...
My brothers...fine.
If I have a male boss, by virtue of leadership, he is superior.

But if you think every man out there, including the useless ones, rapist, paedophiles, kidnappers, ritualists...etc, are above me, because they have prick, that would never be possible.

Apart from family and professional heads, every other prick has to earn it. That includes women, they have to earn the respect they seek. This has nothing to do with feminism.

Well ure on point

bpee:
if this is what. Ladies take feminism to mean,i don't think any reasonable guy will have problems with it
Nice one,,atleast u have sense

I will reiterate knowing does not mean understanding a fair few don't get it.
At all

MissRaine69:
I will reiterate knowing does not mean understanding a fair few don't get it.
At all

yea a lot of ladies are misguided with a wrong perception of feminism

Gourdoinc:
[..]
chances of future girls learning about "woman power"

Ok you seem to be a very nice guy but your definition of feminism and the reasons of what it causes is flawed.

You learnt to chase women and bear their insults because you LOVE THEM? Excuse me, but don't you bear insults from some men too? Can't you be angry at someone regardless of gender? Do you think you have to be physical to hurt someone?
But that's by the way. Which reasonable feminist who knows what she's fighting for is in support of you "bearing" insults or do we first have to look up the word "equality: in a dictionary?

You are supposed to work hard for a WOMAN? Jeez, I'm sorry but if you work out for a WOMAN. You are either a liar or someone who loves being used as an ATM card.
A liar because you work for YOURSELF. YOU, think that's what makes you a man, YOU, think that what gives value to your name. It's all about YOU, YOU, YOU!
Again why should a feminist expect such from you, when they are the ones telling women to work, be independent instead of relying on men?

In fact the next paragraph of "it's romantic to do this and that" proves you love being used. It gives you joy. Nobody, especially not feminists who are more likely to tell you "Cut that crap, I can do it myself ", expects that from you.

The society you come from? Lmao! May I ask which society or rather WHO is the society? Is there a person named society or is it sth. which includes you and I? If yes, then expect people to have different mentalities and ideas and cut that crap of trying to make women, with different mentalities, fit into your idea of how a woman should/ is supposed to be. Especially, if you don't have breasts and a vagina!

Then the "no man will stand up for another man" story. You don't stand up for a man who is ready to punch you etc? Or wait, who is telling you to even stand up and pay for womens' meal? Who is forcing you? Are they threatening to kill you if otherwise?

A true feminist also fights for the boy child. Obviously you really do not understand what "equality" is! All you have to do is SPEAK UP. If you treated women equally why should they be favoured? If you speak about your problems without being scared, then you'll be heard. We can't fight about sth. we know nothing about! What is stopping you from talking about what you face instead of accepting it like it's ok?! Men with a mentality like yours are only just too proud to complain about that , protecting their ego! And oh please, I LOVE having a vagina and do not wish to have a penis dangling down between my legs.

Your most ridiculous argument ever is feminism turns men to women. I mean how low is that? What is your definition of a woman because Mr, it differs.
Human beings can't be put into a box, they are very diverse, extremely different and all have different characters. Gays have lived even before the term feminism existed. There are countless pictures from Rom which prove that. It was just done SECRETLY.
I could as well say a misogynist society breeds rapists, thieves, kidnappers etc because men are raised to be "tough", starting by telling a 3 year old boy "Don't cry, don't you know you are a man?". I could go ahead saying, no wonder most criminals in prisons are men

Women are soft etc? Men are to protect etc? Lol! lol! They are like that or were raised to be like that?! Never heard the "Don't do that, don't you know you are a girl? Don't you know you are a boy?", when obviously the could do otherwise. If you have, then you should know that they're raised to be like that not because they actually are.

Yes men are physically stronger and might feel the urge to protect. But I'd be a fool to run to ANY man in this 21st century for protection. Protection from what? Guns? Bombs? Car accidents? My point is, technology rules now. Intelligence is what counts, what makes someone worthy of a leader. Thankfully that does not exclude a gender. Sorry to break your heart but the more advanced this world gets, the more useless your physical strength too.

It appears to me you are complaining about stuffs you actually feel you have to do, in fact LOVE to do because apparently that's what make you a man! You complain about the advantages you claim women have, yet when feminists fight for equality and also want those disadvantages gone, you complain they shouldn't because of this and that! Loooool!
In fact the opening cars etc, though? Are we talking about Nigerian men? The same men who can't even take care of THEIR kids? Loooooool! Your article was very amusing though, I'm out

Dimples129:
Feminism and naija

Long live feminism

If they fought the white man the way they fight female rights ,Jamaica wouldn't exist

Looool, don't mind them

If they fought corruption the way Fela and Mandela did, Nigeria would be in a better place now but all I see them do is come to nl to whine about a term they know nothing about
Can't even open up the dictionary to check, but have the time to whine about ladies 24/7 as if they are the reasons for their pathetic lives.

lovelygurl:
Looool, don't mind them

If they fought corruption the way Fela and Mandela did, Nigeria would be in a better place now but all I see them do is come to nl to whine about a term they know nothing about
Can't even open up the dictionary to check, but have the time to whine about ladies 24/7 as if they are the reasons for their pathetic lives.

*sighs* don't u think its too early to start a fight dear
Its Saturday naaaaaa....go enjoy ur day....
Am.amused by most of the comments sha....NL is very different from the outside world..n d outside world is d reality!!!
There u know who are d real men/women n who are sissies n whoozies!!!

luminouz:
*sighs* don't u think its too early to start a fight dear
Its Saturday naaaaaa....go enjoy ur day....
Am.amused by most of the comments sha....NL is very different from the outside world..n d outside world is d reality!!!
There u know who are d real men/women n who are sissies n whoozies!!!

...?

lovelygurl:
...?

OK.....I have tried my best though!!!