₦airaland Forum

That home you wanna build may not week sir.
Many stupid ladies everywhere. I keep wondering whether it's more than living on this mother earth for a brief period of decades.

Chase to foolish girl from your life, no woman can even separate me from my family. Family first before any so called woman that is not even the mother of my unborn children.

AreaFada2:
Dude listen carefully.

I doubt if this girl loves you genuinely.

I guess she likes your salary & wants to control you for that. She prefers you forget your family. She can even use any means to achieve that. Including juju. By then you will not even realise when you ostracise your family.

She's already hating people she barely knows: her new family no less.

She's not even hiding her hate for now at least to please you. What about when she's becomes you wife?

Is her own birth family or someone in her birth family advising her to behave this way??

If you can, postpone this wedding. You should have postponed the traditional one too.

If you begin it wrong, correcting it later will be difficult. She will have more legal power as a wedded wife.

Good luck.

OP, having read through most of the comments on ur issue, i will advice u to adopt this advise and see as thin go. Good luck.

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

simply ignore her own family completely, she will receive sense. And be quiet about it.

laudate:
She is not in awe of them, she hates/despises them! She is the possessive type, who wants everything to go her own way. Did you read the OP's subsequent post about how she flared up, and said that his sister was "controlling him" simply because his sister got him the services of a different vendor who charged him 280k as against the 400k his wife wanted to spend?



A woman who truly loves a man, would at least make some effort to show some affection to his family by getting closer to them. A woman who loves a man, would be concerned about the things that matter to such a man! My cousin's wife used to sit down with his mum, because she wanted to hear about all the pranks my cousin got up to, when he was younger! They would both laugh as my aunt recounted the stories, and today both women have formed a strong bond!

The OP's wife has not made any attempt to build any kind of relationship with her in-laws, instead she even expresses anger, whenever the guy gets close to his family. And from his report, his family has not done anything to the wife, to justify her ill will towards them. This woman will alienate him from his family - just watch. And she would end up putting him under her thumb in order to have him at her beck & call. He should just have a showdown/confrontation with her about the issue, and clear the air once and for all. A broken engagement is far better and easier to manage, than a broken marriage.

cc: amliftedhigher

I repeat, the wife doesn't hate the family.

I read the scenario the OP painted in the later post. From what he wrote, all I can adduce from that is the wife has some sort of inferiority complex.

She feels the OP is a lot closer to the sisters than herself. And it's a completely normal scenario you see everyday amongst women.

You guys are trying to blow it out of proportion. This is something a simple discourse will handle.

The Wife loves OP right? Is it possible for one to love someone and hate the person's family? I think not.

Why is it that first or only son are always foolish when it comes to women matter?

I don't even know how some ladies intend marrying a man while hating his family.

Evacroft:
This is a clear perspective, ur wife is hating on ur family without no reason, sit her down and have a heart to heart talk with her,let her know all ur worries about d way she is reciprocating the love been shown to her by ur family and pls be firm and no offensive or defensive tactics, pls dont give into any emotional blackmail by her unless ur sis are truly not what they seem. Let her not bring negativity it will backfire on her cos she already has a mindset. But most importantly settle it and remember u are already married.

Seat who down? Don't you know that ladies can pretend and suddenly turn in good attitude. After marriage, they change to the worst. She doesn't need any seating down. Call off the wedding! This is the red flag otherwise you'll regret ever getting married to her.

coolcatty:
Smh

This marriage is so so heading to the rocks.... See massive red flag.

10k bet that this marriage won't get to 1year mark.

Who's betting with me on this?

Guy you wan chop alone? Abeg join my 40k bet to am joor.

Op have you tried to ask her why she hates your family? Family is everything. It seems she's not matured enough. If you saw all this in beginning why do trad.? She seems like she's after your money and can even kill you to claim it for herself and family. Shii happens.

amliftedhigher:
please I was only asking a question. I didn't and will not try to dissociate with my family members?

if your wife hate your family including your mum for no just cause, who do she now love, YOU! your sister have your character, if she hate them, she certainly hate you, but she just need to get married

obayaya:
I repeat, the wife doesn't hate the family.

I read the scenario the OP painted in the later post. From what he wrote, all I can adduce from that is the wife has some sort of inferiority complex.

She feels the OP is a lot closer to the sisters than herself. And it's a completely normal scenario you see everyday amongst women.

You guys are trying to blow it out of proportion. This is something a simple discourse will handle.

The Wife loves OP right? Is it possible for one to love someone and hate the person's family? I think not.

Shut up and thing with your brain. Is that the characteristics of inferiority complex? Go back to school and learn what inferiority complex mean. Call off the wedding or regret it. She is a green snake, under the green grass and eating the green grass.

davidadenrele:
You can imagine yourself calliing men weak if you are going give an advise, give it politely you don't have to give it with insult to all "men" ain't you a product of a man? respect is resprocial, for the fact you few mega bytes of data to use on nairaond should not call for insult.

Sorry about that

I strongly advise you cancel the wedding. If you marry this woman you are going to have a very serious family challenge in the future. My family had a similar case. When my elder bro was abt to marry the signs were manifesting but we felt that everything will be alright. Mother so loved this lady that she often want to see her. But just after d wedding this woman showed her true colours, she made sure no one from my family visits my bro. Today the children are all grown up some in the university, and she has succeeded in turning them against their father and my family. They dont relate with their cousins from their father's side, they only know their mother's family. Op i advice that you run now that there is still time.

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

If you marry her you're finished. She hates your family now, she will hate you next. Run when you still can.

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

You better drop her as 'E DEY HOT' before u come under God

broswilli:
Let me contribute a bit. I don't know ur wife. I don't know ur sisters, but Women are a bit different from men believe it or not. Your wife wants a man not controlled by his sisters, if she fells you are controlled by them she will eventually hate you

Your sisters will definitely want to control you, without regarding that you are now a man. Your wife will hate that. If they are contributing to the marriage ceremonies don't let your wife know. After the wedding or right now start turning down some of the request of ur sisters, like little brother can you help to pick my husband from the airport.

Please note that women control Men and most times the men don't know. Their husbands may complain, "You are disturbing ur younger brother too much", and their reply would be, "Don't worry he is my younger brother".

No Woman wants to marry a man controlled by another Woman or Man. If he is to be controlled then they should do the controlling.

Watch yourself if you have madr these mistakes if not you know what to do, the other post has already mentioned useful decisions to make.

1000 likes.

When they say men should be man enough they think its only about financial responsibilities

I just pity the OP, no matter who he marries this same issue will crop up again.

What is happening is simply power play and I am surprised the OP is not seeing this.

When you are an only son surrounded by sisters your head has to be 101% correct or else..... if you are not careful you will see one party as the enemy and most times its not so. Same power play also happens with mothers in law and daughters in law.

Oyindidi:
Why do I have the huge to insult you for your last sentence.
That girl is wicked for hating your family for no reason. Where was your wife when they were training you? Weak men everywhere.

Why do I have the urge (not huge) to insult you?

When a man takes his stand, you call him "insensitive bast*rd". But when he tries to compromise for you, you can him "weak man".

If you don't have solution for the confused guy, then kip Kwayet!

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

u are an ungrateful man. Is this how u wana pay for all the kindness your family has shown to u? If u are not an ungrateful person, cancel that marriage now or remain ungrateful the rest of ur life. Ur family is first before any fycking woman from the pit of hell. Its a big sign that where u r going is a wrong direction. I am sure the parents of the girl especially her mother, will be the ones teaching her this evil. Beta run for ur life. If u marry this girl, it shall not be well with u. Mark my words

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.
Thanks in anticipation

Please don't Marry her
Call off the wedding. Don't make a very big mistake. Don't be a weak man.

Oyindidi:
Why do I have the huge to insult you for your last sentence.
That girl is wicked for hating your family for no reason. Where was your wife when they were training you? Weak men everywhere.

your last statement nick the bud!

Localamos:
Why do I have the urge (not huge) to insult you?

When a man takes his stand, you call him "insensitive bast*rd". But when he tries to compromise for you, you can him "weak man".

If you don't have solution for the confused guy, then kip Kwayet!

I'm trying to be nice this morning. Thanks for the correction

broswilli:
Let me contribute a bit. I don't know ur wife. I don't know ur sisters, but Women are a bit different from men believe it or not. Your wife wants a man not controlled by his sisters, if she fells you are controlled by them she will eventually hate you.

Your sisters will definitely want to control you, without regarding that you are now a man. Your wife will hate that. If they are contributing to the marriage ceremonies don't let your wife know. After the wedding or right now start turning down some of the request of ur sisters, like little brother can you help to pick my husband from the airport.

Please note that women control Men and most times the men don't know. Their husbands may complain, "You are disturbing ur younger brother too much", and their reply would be, "Don't worry he is my younger brother".

No Woman wants to marry a man controlled by another Woman or Man. If he is to be controlled then they should do the controlling.

Watch yourself if you have madr these mistakes if not you know what to do, the other post has already mentioned useful decisions to make.

1000 Likes.

kennypedia:
What is this man saying? Mtchweeew

Woman, you've got to work on your comprehension. Geskia.

obayaya:
I repeat, the wife doesn't hate the family.

I read the scenario the OP painted in the later post. From what he wrote, all I can adduce from that is the wife has some sort of inferiority complex.

She feels the OP is a lot closer to the sisters than herself. And it's a completely normal scenario you see everyday amongst women.

You guys are trying to blow it out of proportion. This is something a simple discourse will handle.

The Wife loves OP right? Is it possible for one to love someone and hate the person's family? I think not.

Please dont be naive. With this assertion of yours you will only end up pushing the op to his doom. This lady does not love the op let alone his family. I had a similar experience which i've shared already.

amliftedhigher:
Good morning wonderful nairalanders.

I Am having a very delicate family issues now. I am an only son of my family and 5 sisters all married, since I brought my wife to be to them they all love her with passion and they keep telling me to take good care of the girl, they keep warning me not to treat her bad.

My sister love my Wife with passion including my aged mother but my wife to be in return hates them openly to me.

She doesn't like me mention them before her or discuss any thing with them. But she adores her family so much. We have finished traditional marriage remaining church wedding which is next two weeks from today.

During our preparations my family has noticed her long mute with them in issues of our wedding arrangement, they ask me but I told them that my wife is a shy type that doesn't talk too much but I was lying.

N/B they have not done anything evil to her and they will not think about it because they all fear me but my confusion Now is why my wife hates them? One of my sister lives in the same city with my wife but she hardly visits her.

My fellow comrades please what do I do? I can't hate my sisters because they and their husbands train me in the university . I came from a poor home but seeing the love I have for education all My sisters and their husbands swear that I must attend university . My God's grace I am working in one of the best organization in the country now am comfortable. Do I chase my family away now because of a woman I am getting married to? Help am confused.

Thanks in anticipation

brotherly i tell the truth,for over five years haven been in Nairaland i just registered now just to advise you on this issue...have been a nairaland fan but just come and read only...to the main thing..brother mi, am married for 3 years and some month, i may not have stayed long in marriage to advise you but plz take something out of this i want to tell you.. have seen you r the type that values family. same with me. if and when you go ahead with this marriage and She continues with this attitude you mention ,brotherly you'll just be looking at yourself going down....you know what is good and bad..some people will tell you that u r allowing your family too much into ur matter..chaii na lie..as u rightly said 400k from 280k the different na person salary and she want you to waste it to please her , my brother that kind of person will not make you add or gain but only loss and loss and loss...i leave you with this, tackle this now you have the chance cos if u enter hmmm, maybe you are the type that believes in till death do us path...brother that death will do u path early if the right thing is not done. in my own suggestion are

1. if possible call her meeting with her own family and see if she can say what her angry is for. if she doesn't say anything meaningful as many has said in this tread ur marry will hit the rock

2.pray very well over this ..when i mean pray , i don't mean go to papa or mama in church ..i mean on ur knees and pray cos na u go leave with her not them.

3. do not think that people you look at you less if this marriage do not get to complete cos ur life and family should be the priority here not what people think.

good luck brother

Yelutide:
Shut up and thing with your brain. Is that the characteristics of inferiority complex? Go back to school and learn what inferiority complex mean. Call off the wedding or regret it. She is a green snake, under the green grass and eating the green grass.

inferiority complex
noun
1. an unrealistic feeling of general inadequacy caused by actual or supposed inferiority in one sphere, sometimes marked by aggressive behaviour in compensation.

you are welcome

mabea:
Please dont be naive. With this assertion of yours you will only end up pushing the op to his doom. This lady does not love the op let alone his family. I had a similar experience which i've shared already.

Your Experience isn't the same with OP's. Stop judging OP's situation based on your experience

coolcatty:
Smh

This marriage is so so heading to the rocks.... See massive red flag.

10k bet that this marriage won't get to 1year mark.

Who's betting with me on this?

let's make it 20...I'm with you on this

amliftedhigher:
To be truthful to you, she never showed any of this attitude before our TM. The irony is that this people loved her so much

U have not finished seeing her attitude. This is still the fresh side oo

NoToPile:
1000 likes.

When they say men should be man enough they think its only about financial responsibilities

I just pity the OP, no matter who he marries this same issue will crop up again.

What is happening is simply power play and I am surprised the OP is not seeing this.

When you are an only son surrounded by sisters your head has to be 101% correct or else..... if you are not careful you will see one party as the enemy and most times its not so. Same power play also happens with mothers in law and daughters in law.

Your advise is based on hypothesis. You only work base on the informations you were given. Trust me if you think the lady is acting this way in order to push the op be a man you will be making a mistake.

Pained!


Pls how old is the op?

Op head mno correct atallatall.....he need factory resetting......................