₦airaland Forum

I am seeing your friend in vision coming here to tell us how his wife left him because of a richer man.

beautifulrosa:
Hmmmm
People are different sha. Everyone cannot be the same.

When i met my husband i didnt even know he is as rich as he is. He presented himself as a normal struggling guy and never for once hinted at his job. He jus told me he was an accountant. Nothing more. He jus looked a bit comfortable to me. Nothing to suggest anything.

Truth be told, at some point i felt i needed someone better, maybe with more money. But this guy loved me and stopped at nothing to make me happy.

Well d happiness for me was more important than the size of his pocket....so then we started planning to settle down.

Few days before our wedding, he started to let me in on the 'real' him. And then as soon as we were married....he let me in on everything. I was wowed. No d8oubt i had caught a big fish way way beyond my league.

Today, am grateful to God who didnt let me loose this sweet man who gives me with so much happiness.

Despite all that, i still want to be a hardworking wife so i can earn something at least to support him no matter how little. I wld not sit and expect him to provide all d comfort while i do nothing. I feel i can also contribute sso even if he had nothing i wld still av married him as it wasnt even about d money in the firsr place.

Not every lady can manage. Not every lady thinks she can do sth to support her man even if he has nothing.
Thats why i say people are different.

Women like you are what we need in this world. Kudos!

It's psychology. People tend to want people that treat them like they don't matter. Sadly, it's so easy to take those who care deeply for granted.

mapet:
My Sista,

You have simply asked a question that is so simple and so valid. My concern is that we are raising "d.a.f.t" and weak boys these days. That is why fathers should spend more time in nurturing boys, so that they can grow up to be real men and not some mummy's pet.

Secondly relationship issues mostly come out with causalities that follow the same template - It is those partners that will harm them that they will choose to stick with

I don't understand why people say I can't marry someone that is not a graduate,train her and let her be one

DJperdurabo:
Just left one who couldn't cook, no kitchen skills and was VERY PROUD about it (telling me she s not interested in cooking or learning how, and that we could always order for food, eat out or get a cook and how her ex was always doing the cooking and breakfast in bed thingy). Well, no be quarrel, she has rights to what she wants in life and me too get my own right and seeing her right be like my left, I kukuma jejely pack my load. I nor dey for wahala.

Get a cook? Where d money?!

Bro u correct, u set ur minimum standards and any lady wia no meet up, u move ahead...relationship no b by force.

duchez:
Hello N'landers.

My friend just shared his story with me. I have advised him but I need your thoughts.

He met a lady around March this year and they became friends. He is an Accountant and works with a Federal Government Agency in Abuja. Along the line he asked her out and she insisted he finishes his ICAN before they can start dating.

Long story short, she later accepted to date him. Probably because he passed all but one of the exams in the Professional stage of ICAN. He recently invested some huge sum of money into a biz deal. He told me it was actually all of his savings and he would become a multi millionaire if the deal works out.

He decided to test this lady to find out if she will stick with him if the going ever gets tough (as a result of our insistence that the lady isn't really into him). And so he told her that the deal he was working on had failed and that he has become broke. He said he will like to marry her and try to sustain themselves on his current salary of about 180k pending when things become better but she replied that she can't marry someone who is earning 180k monthly. She feels it would make her drop from her standard of living as she wants to live inside the city of Abuja and not in the outskirts like Karu or Kubwa. Mind you, her parents live in one of these places and the guy is not even thinking of living in anywhere beyond these places like Nyanya/Mararaba.

This guy loves this girl so bad and is a very hardworking guy. He is hoping to get promoted when he completes his ICAN and is even looking at getting a better job in a bigger Government Agency or a Multinational company. He is so distraught at what the lady said. We have advised him to forget about her and move on, but he is considering opening up to the lady that what he said about the deal was just a test in the hope to make her re-consider him.

Please, were we wrong with our advice? Meanwhile, this guy's ex loves him like there is no tomorrow and she will gladly marry him even if he was earning 30k monthly but due to family pressure on him to marry a graduate and an Igbo lady, he broke up with her. Me thinks he can still persuade his parents to accept the lady.

If you were in our shoes, will you advice your friend differently?

Thanks for your comments. The lady earns around 180k but she mentioned that she spends around 300k when going shopping and she is scared she would no longer be able to do that if she marries him as she would have to contribute almost all her salary to maintaining the family.

Well to me first I will consider her beauty in making decision whether to inform her is fake or not, if she is damn pretty and looks like faithful type, but only shortcoming is the above issue (ego )then no problem ,he can go on,is better for the bridegroom to be madly in love than the bride,it brings security to the marriage ,especially from the angle of the guy seeing other ladies outside, but if she is not damn pretty and with this ego attitudes, then the guy should run 440,because if such unpleasant situations arise with her ugly appearance and ugly attitude, na dia be dat oh.

khristal87:
Bro u correct, u set ur minimum standards and any lady wia no meet up, u move ahead...relationship no b by force.

Na so my broad. No be do or die mata.

Am dying to meet your friend,am from Imo too,will give him all the happiness in the world, that lady will crush his heart. ..nobody should quote me..please tell your friend to dm

This Brings Us To The Question, Who Should You Marry? The Person That You Love Or The Person That Loves You?