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Mistake Married Women Make - Family (5) - Nairaland

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OverEducated Women Make Bad Wives / Married Women, Do You Still Give Guys Your Contact? Why? / 60% Of Married Women Don’t Love Their Husbands- Lady Says, See Response (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Mistake Married Women Make by Radiant1020(f): 7:14am On Dec 18, 2017
Toks2008:
1. Poor communication:

In every relationship we find ourselves,communication is vital. No one is a mind reader and no matter what it may be that could be a reason for your unhappiness,speak out immediately in a stern manner and not laikadaisically.
Many women are found of calling their hubby's relatives to complain about certain issues meanwhile the hubby at home does not have an idea of how hurting they are concerning that issue.

2. Sharing their marital issue with a male admirer/friend .

Not every guy you know is responsible. We have some low lives that has no regard for any form of decency and it is no news that many guys are in this category.
When you discuss your marital issues with an admirer or a male friend,most times what these guys hear is "im vulnurable,i need you as a succor". This is why most times,when a married woman take solace in a male friend,the end result is usually an illicit affair.

3. Being careless with male friends .

I have always maintained that there is nothing like just friends between a married woman and another man.
If he is not your childhood friend,co-worker,co-student,business partner then you have no business with him.
Many married ladies have a careless habit of keeping male friends indiscriminately and worst still get so careless allowing these guys call them by their maiden names.
I will never call a married lady by her maiden name because just as the name suggests,its her unmarried name but will rather put Mrs,sis,madam.
When a married lady is called by her maiden name,it diminishes as well as tarnishes her respect,image and matrimony giving room for a potential unethical relationship between her and the "just male friends".

4. Seeking vengeance .

Many married lady tend to take some actions in order to prove to their hubby that a sauce for the goose is also ok for the gander but unfortunately this will destroy your marriage more.
When you take a revenge on your hubby by sleeping with another man because he cheats on you,of what use will that be to you?
What value will that add to your life?
Learn to maintain your dignity no matter what because at the end,the shame will all come back to you and as I always reiterate. ..nobody can make you do what you are not capable of doing.

5. Talking down on your hubby.

This is one foolish mistake many ladies do. You and your hubby are one and talking down on him means talking down on yourself. It is one thing to voice out what he did and another to use outright abusive words on him.

In situations where a couple seperates,some ladies will not mind talking down on their hubby with a friend,their family and even with male suitors and i keep wondering if the woman thinks this will earn her any form of respect.

If you call your hubby a sick man then what does that make you? Or you call your hubby an asshole then it takes an asshole to tango with such a man.
No matter how angry you may be,don't ever rule out reconcilation and even if you are never going to reconcile,respect your matrimony with him even if he deserves no respect from you.

6.Moving out of their matrimonial home hastily over an avoidable reason .

What excuse do you have for running out of your marriage?
He cheated on you,he does not give you attention,he took you for granted,he curses you and many more are the excuses married ladies hold on to and i keep asking this one question;
Will leaving solve the problem? Even a divorce is not a way out because its a 50/50 chance that the next man won't be worse so i advice that you confront that problem and try your best to solve it.

7. Believing there is always a better man out there .

This is one foolish thing married ladies believe. That they will get a better replacement.There are more than enough never married ladies out there for the unmarried guys so you will do yourself a great honor by sticking to your husband.
There is really no better man out there and except you are faced with an unrepentant violent man,please remain in your marriage because you will soon realize that its the same cycle we all go through in any union we find ourselves and there will always be one reason to leave any man you are married to.

Many women divorcees realize this too late as they end up as a toy in the hands of randy men,as second wife,or end up single for a long time as many men will believe they are doing them a big favour by wanting to be with them.

If you must throw in the towel on your marriage,make sure you have exhausted all means of reconciliation because i keep saying that it is better to be single at 40 than to be a divorcee at 20 and a 40 year old single lady is more maritally appealing than a 20year old divorcee,funny but true so think very well before you run out of your marriage.

8.Sharing their marital issues with single female friends ..

Like seriously! it may surprise you to know that most of your friends who are still single are not happy that you are married so take your marital problem to them at your own risk.

9.Not looking sexy enough.

If our sultry actress Omotola jalade is looking this sexy after three children then tell me why you can't look sexy too.
Laziness is one big problem with most married ladies.Men get carried away by what they see so do yourself a favour, get that big tummy down and get into crazy bum shorts and flaunt that thing.
We know you cant maintain that sexy look we saw the very first time we met you but at least try your best to look sexy for the next 30years for us after marriage.

10. Never sorry .

Many women are so proud,egocentric and sturbborn to the extent that when they do or say things that are conspicously wrong,they will never or hardly apologize but rather would want to buttress the rationale behind their actions and most men see this as an appalling nature. Be quick to apologize even when you are right..men are naturally egocentric hence the need to bring down your ego to avoid the case of two men married to each other.

11.Geting insecure and monitoring her husband

I have always advised married women to let their men be. Believe whatever he says even when it is clear that he is lieng.The moment you start getting overly jealous,suspicious is the moment you begin to lose your self worth. Don't bother whether he is faithful or not but sternly tell him to play safe if he must be unfaithful and warn him to do it far from you cos what the eyes do not see do not hurt. Yes this sounds crazy but trust me,it works like magic because the husband will likely be on his toes and respect you the more. Remember that a man will always be a man and you can never monitor him
.
12.Not good enough in the kitchen and the other room : .

If you are a married lady reading this please don't ever joke with these two places because any woman who knows how to use these two places will most likely have her husband where she wants him cos the way to a man's heart is forever through his stomach and down there.

13.Taking the job of a full housewife.

As you can clearly deduce,being a full housewife is a big job because those who babysit get paid so I quite understand how demanding this can be but nevertheless,don't settle for that,no matter how demanding the task of keeping the home front can be, still do something to be financially independent. Your husband may tell you he does not want you to work promising to provide all your needs but we both know he really can't do that without asking funny questions from you when you demand for money so it is important to have something doing so that the financial pressure will be less on your husband and you can also be self reliant.Being financially independent can also come in handy if your hubby faces any financial crises so take this advise seriously because financial pressure is a great destroyer of marriage.

I don't know if these make sense

https://www.nairaland.com/3867979/13-awkward-things-married-women

It'll be difficult for a woman to please you

3 Likes

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by nnamdiosu(m): 7:15am On Dec 18, 2017
queenfav:
Even the men a woman lies stark naaked in bed for, will still cheat if they want to.... It takes a lot of self discipline and the fear of God for a man to be a good husband, it's not a function of what his woman does or doesn't do!A woman should however try to stay attractive for her man.

We know the above is true.....however let the ladies do their part so we know at least you tried. Its like someone saying that..."since everybody will die one day, let me just cross road without looking"
Marriage is however more than staying attractive, although its one of the things that keep it.
Thanks

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by arabaribiti(m): 7:16am On Dec 18, 2017
hobermener:
Marriage is hella overrated!!
Why bring two different people from different backgrounds, who hold different values and possess different traits under one union, merging them as both one, leaving them with the life long struggle of reconciling their differences with time

I just taya undecided

The same thing they did to Nigeria
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by PrimadonnaO(f): 7:17am On Dec 18, 2017
Aadibros:


While I agree with some of what you have written. However, I have the following responses to share.

1. Men should be patient to truly understand why their wives give those excuses about sex. She could be stressed out or have hormonal issues. Also, women's urge for sex isn't same as men's - medically explained. Husband go do all the romantic stuff to him GF to arouse her but e go just command him wife like sacrificial lamb wey suppose just spread for bed. The question is, how sincerely has he tried to communicate with her to understand why there is a change in how she responds to sex compared to the early times of their marriage? She may be unhappy with the man or certain situations. Also, why wont she lose her urge if her husband only comes to her or becomes nice to her when he needs sex? All your yarns no be excuse for the man to begin go outside him marriage. Like someone correctly said, even when the wife give am daily, man wey go go outside still dey go.

2. I understand and have experienced that behavior but trust me, she is not happy about a lot of things. So if you know how you were so loving before you married her to get the best of her, do same and more to find out why she is happier when you are not around. You annoy her and don't genuinely repent and you think settling an issue ends in love making. Then look for a prostitute not a wife. Nothing justifies a man staying out to drink. It is not in a man's DNA!!!

3. Your third point no even clear.

4. Reactions are effects of earlier actions.

5. The man should learn to love his wife and family the way he need from day 1. I am against either of the parents taking out their anger on innocent children, but this doesn't apply to females alone so don't make it a female thing.

Bottom line, it is not a man's world!!! I don't know where that bull crap came from. Why should a husband treat his wife like he is doing her a favor to be married to him? What the heck do you think you give her or do for her that she cant get more outside too if she decides to go out the way men stupidly justify their reasons for going out? Some men annoyingly say it is to answer a man's name. which dirty name? you be Dangote or Jeff Bezos? How much you even pay for bride price or dowry? How much your best wedding even cost?
The earlier we start treating our wives as wives, the better. Happy wife, happy home!!! Why because they are the support. Nothing lasts long without good support system. Shikina!!!

You're a darling! kiss

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by Nobody: 7:19am On Dec 18, 2017
queenfav:
Even the men a woman lies stark naaked in bed for, will still cheat if they want to.... It takes a lot of self discipline and the fear of God for a man to be a good husband, it's not a function of what his woman does or doesn't do!A woman should however try to stay attractive for her man.
Let the woman do her matrimonial duties and the fault lie with the man.
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by safarigirl(f): 7:21am On Dec 18, 2017
Tyche:


The app helped you recreate yourself as you wanted it. The niqqa is not far from the truth neither eye dey pain am grin
I'm not responsible for the editing. A friend of mine used an actual picture of mine and sent that to me. He didn't tell me what app it is though
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by Nobody: 7:25am On Dec 18, 2017
Gracesofar:



Don't bring the broken home thing. Even if z from one, he never chooses his parents. Every kid wants a happy family I guess some of us just ain't that lucky.

I hope u understand me. The guy choosed z life, dz y he reasons the way he does. His not evident coz z from a broken home or so.

We r all d way we r. The world won't stop throwing peels on our part it just depend how much advantage we can take of it.
Ok Sir
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by Nobody: 7:30am On Dec 18, 2017
Toks2008:
1. Poor communication:

In every relationship we find ourselves,communication is vital. No one is a mind reader and no matter what it may be that could be a reason for your unhappiness,speak out immediately in a stern manner and not laikadaisically.
Many women are found of calling their hubby's relatives to complain about certain issues meanwhile the hubby at home does not have an idea of how hurting they are concerning that issue.

2. Sharing their marital issue with a male admirer/friend .

Not every guy you know is responsible. We have some low lives that has no regard for any form of decency and it is no news that many guys are in this category.
When you discuss your marital issues with an admirer or a male friend,most times what these guys hear is "im vulnurable,i need you as a succor". This is why most times,when a married woman take solace in a male friend,the end result is usually an illicit affair.

3. Being careless with male friends .

I have always maintained that there is nothing like just friends between a married woman and another man.
If he is not your childhood friend,co-worker,co-student,business partner then you have no business with him.
Many married ladies have a careless habit of keeping male friends indiscriminately and worst still get so careless allowing these guys call them by their maiden names.
I will never call a married lady by her maiden name because just as the name suggests,its her unmarried name but will rather put Mrs,sis,madam.
When a married lady is called by her maiden name,it diminishes as well as tarnishes her respect,image and matrimony giving room for a potential unethical relationship between her and the "just male friends".

4. Seeking vengeance .

Many married lady tend to take some actions in order to prove to their hubby that a sauce for the goose is also ok for the gander but unfortunately this will destroy your marriage more.
When you take a revenge on your hubby by sleeping with another man because he cheats on you,of what use will that be to you?
What value will that add to your life?
Learn to maintain your dignity no matter what because at the end,the shame will all come back to you and as I always reiterate. ..nobody can make you do what you are not capable of doing.

5. Talking down on your hubby.

This is one foolish mistake many ladies do. You and your hubby are one and talking down on him means talking down on yourself. It is one thing to voice out what he did and another to use outright abusive words on him.

In situations where a couple seperates,some ladies will not mind talking down on their hubby with a friend,their family and even with male suitors and i keep wondering if the woman thinks this will earn her any form of respect.

If you call your hubby a sick man then what does that make you? Or you call your hubby an asshole then it takes an asshole to tango with such a man.
No matter how angry you may be,don't ever rule out reconcilation and even if you are never going to reconcile,respect your matrimony with him even if he deserves no respect from you.

6.Moving out of their matrimonial home hastily over an avoidable reason .

What excuse do you have for running out of your marriage?
He cheated on you,he does not give you attention,he took you for granted,he curses you and many more are the excuses married ladies hold on to and i keep asking this one question;
Will leaving solve the problem? Even a divorce is not a way out because its a 50/50 chance that the next man won't be worse so i advice that you confront that problem and try your best to solve it.

7. Believing there is always a better man out there .

This is one foolish thing married ladies believe. That they will get a better replacement.There are more than enough never married ladies out there for the unmarried guys so you will do yourself a great honor by sticking to your husband.
There is really no better man out there and except you are faced with an unrepentant violent man,please remain in your marriage because you will soon realize that its the same cycle we all go through in any union we find ourselves and there will always be one reason to leave any man you are married to.

Many women divorcees realize this too late as they end up as a toy in the hands of randy men,as second wife,or end up single for a long time as many men will believe they are doing them a big favour by wanting to be with them.

If you must throw in the towel on your marriage,make sure you have exhausted all means of reconciliation because i keep saying that it is better to be single at 40 than to be a divorcee at 20 and a 40 year old single lady is more maritally appealing than a 20year old divorcee,funny but true so think very well before you run out of your marriage.

8.Sharing their marital issues with single female friends ..

Like seriously! it may surprise you to know that most of your friends who are still single are not happy that you are married so take your marital problem to them at your own risk.

9.Not looking sexy enough.

If our sultry actress Omotola jalade is looking this sexy after three children then tell me why you can't look sexy too.
Laziness is one big problem with most married ladies.Men get carried away by what they see so do yourself a favour, get that big tummy down and get into crazy bum shorts and flaunt that thing.
We know you cant maintain that sexy look we saw the very first time we met you but at least try your best to look sexy for the next 30years for us after marriage.

10. Never sorry .

Many women are so proud,egocentric and sturbborn to the extent that when they do or say things that are conspicously wrong,they will never or hardly apologize but rather would want to buttress the rationale behind their actions and most men see this as an appalling nature. Be quick to apologize even when you are right..men are naturally egocentric hence the need to bring down your ego to avoid the case of two men married to each other.

11.Geting insecure and monitoring her husband

I have always advised married women to let their men be. Believe whatever he says even when it is clear that he is lieng.The moment you start getting overly jealous,suspicious is the moment you begin to lose your self worth. Don't bother whether he is faithful or not but sternly tell him to play safe if he must be unfaithful and warn him to do it far from you cos what the eyes do not see do not hurt. Yes this sounds crazy but trust me,it works like magic because the husband will likely be on his toes and respect you the more. Remember that a man will always be a man and you can never monitor him
.
12.Not good enough in the kitchen and the other room : .

If you are a married lady reading this please don't ever joke with these two places because any woman who knows how to use these two places will most likely have her husband where she wants him cos the way to a man's heart is forever through his stomach and down there.

13.Taking the job of a full housewife.

As you can clearly deduce,being a full housewife is a big job because those who babysit get paid so I quite understand how demanding this can be but nevertheless,don't settle for that,no matter how demanding the task of keeping the home front can be, still do something to be financially independent. Your husband may tell you he does not want you to work promising to provide all your needs but we both know he really can't do that without asking funny questions from you when you demand for money so it is important to have something doing so that the financial pressure will be less on your husband and you can also be self reliant.Being financially independent can also come in handy if your hubby faces any financial crises so take this advise seriously because financial pressure is a great destroyer of marriage.

I don't know if these make sense

https://www.nairaland.com/3867979/13-awkward-things-married-women


I call this point, the divorced/alternate mindset



Believing there is always a better man out there .

This is one foolish thing married ladies believe. That they will get a better replacement.There are more than enough never married ladies out there for the unmarried guys so you will do yourself a great honor by sticking to your husband.
There is really no better man out there and except you are faced with an unrepentant violent man,please remain in your marriage because you will soon realize that its the same cycle we all go through in any union we find ourselves and there will always be one reason to leave any man you are married to.

Many women divorcees realize this too late as they end up as a toy in the hands of randy men,as second wife,or end up single for a long time as many men will believe they are doing them a big favour by wanting to be with them.

If you must throw in the towel on your marriage,make sure you have exhausted all means of reconciliation because i keep saying that it is better to be single at 40 than to be a divorcee at 20 and a 40 year old single lady is more maritally appealing than a 20year old divorcee,funny but true so think very well before you run out of your marriage.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by eyinjuege: 7:30am On Dec 18, 2017
Divorce will continue to be on the increase until people practice what they preach.
You want respect? Do you also respect your spouse?
You want a clean nice home? Please do you bother to vacuum daily?
You want to eat good food? Can you cook good food?
Life is give and take.
Women also want all those things listed and more. They equally want good sex, and not just bang, bang , bang. They don't want a smelly blob of fat over them with putrid breathe, no wonder they keep having headaches every night.
For anyone to enjoy a marriage ( both man and woman) all hands have to be on deck. Nothing kills faster than a bad partner.

7 Likes

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by emmie14: 7:31am On Dec 18, 2017
hobermener:
Marriage is hella overrated!!
Why bring two different people from different backgrounds, who hold different values and possess different traits under one union, merging them as both one, leaving them with the life long struggle of reconciling their differences with time

I just taya undecided
Like one Nigeria. Wazobia

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by emmie14: 7:33am On Dec 18, 2017
eyinjuege:
Divorce will continue to be on the increase until people practice what they preach.
You want respect? Do you also respect your spouse?
You want a clean nice home? Please do you bother to vacuum daily?
You want to eat good food? Can you cook good food?
Life is give and take.
Women also want all those things listed and more. They equally want good sex, and not just bang, bang , bang. They don't want a smelly blob of fat over them with putrid breathe, no wonder they keep having headaches every night
feminist sighted
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by iamrammy(m): 7:36am On Dec 18, 2017
safarigirl:
and the most annoying thing about such men is that thwy are not in shape.

It's one thing to wantg your wife to look good, buy you cannot expect her to look like Rihanna when you're looking like Rick Ross.

A marriage is a partnership that requires two people to constantly pull each other up whenever one person is down, not to beat the person down.
have you seen rick ross latey? issa fraud to marry a woman who looks like Rihanna and 4yrs down the line she begins to look like eniola badmus! drops mic
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by Nobody: 7:36am On Dec 18, 2017
Aadibros:
wetin this one dey talk again abeg?
You know yasef finish?
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by omooba969(m): 7:39am On Dec 18, 2017
MhizzAJ:
Noted

All the points or some?

How are you? cool
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by powerkey: 7:43am On Dec 18, 2017
queenfav:
Even the men a woman lies stark naaked in bed for, will still cheat if they want to.... It takes a lot of self discipline and the fear of God for a man to be a good husband, it's not a function of what his woman does or doesn't do!A woman should however try to stay attractive for her man.

Read what the OP wrote again...

Laying naked for me on the bed without the emotional connection is useless and going to be counterproductive.

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by eyinjuege: 7:45am On Dec 18, 2017
emmie14:
feminist sighted

More like someone with a functional brain sighted.
How can you expect what you cannot give? Life will be better if people can do unto others what they expect from others.
Nothing about feminism here. I cut some people slack because I expect them to cut me some slack too. I'm only human.
However if i expect perfection, I must be perfect myself. Its that simple

3 Likes

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by emmie14: 7:49am On Dec 18, 2017
eyinjuege:


More like someone with a functional brain sighted.
How can you expect what you cannot give? Life will be better if people can do unto others what they expect from others.
Nothing about feminism here. I cut some people slack because I expect them to cut me some slack too. I'm only human.
However if i expect perfection, I must be perfect myself. Its that simple
Sngle nagging mum 4life
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by eyinjuege: 8:02am On Dec 18, 2017
emmie14:

Sngle nagging mum 4life

Smallie, the truth is bitter.

Embrace it, and it will set you free

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by emmie14: 8:04am On Dec 18, 2017
eyinjuege:


Smallie, the truth is bitter.

Embrace it, and it will set you free
Immaturity is your only problem. Till you exhaust your presumed perfection and remain single then you will understand .
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by pocohantas(f): 8:14am On Dec 18, 2017
emmie14:
feminist sighted

When will you guys start having logical counters, instead of singing feminism. Is it so difficult to think and come up with a civil argument? Nawa for this generation of men o!

OP, nice list.

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by emmie14: 8:16am On Dec 18, 2017
pocohantas:


When will you guys start having logical counters, instead of singing feminism. Is it so difficult to think and come up with a civil argument? Nawa for this generation of men o!

OP, nice list.
Keep your kitchen bathroom and bedroom neat. Your duty before going to work. I doubt you type can maintain employment.
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by eyinjuege: 8:20am On Dec 18, 2017
emmie14:

Immaturity is your only problem. Till you exhaust your presumed perfection and remain single then you will understand .

I have been married more years than you've been an adult.
I am also a professional. I juggle family life and work together. My partner does the same. We have a partnership, and its working fine for us.

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by safarigirl(f): 8:39am On Dec 18, 2017
iamrammy:
have you seen rick ross latey? issa fraud to marry a woman who looks like Rihanna and 4yrs down the line she begins to look like eniola badmus! drops mic
she looks like Eniola because you failed in your responsibility to motivate her. Same way you may not be working at your best as a man when your wife fails to encourage you.

You think if you wake up by 5am every morning or on weekends to exercise that your wife will be sleeping in bed? Your habits will rub off on your partner, if you are in bed by 5am, why should she get up at same time to exercise?

A couple that gyms together, stays together

2 Likes

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by kalu61(m): 9:02am On Dec 18, 2017
hobermener:
Marriage is hella overrated!!
Why bring two different people from different backgrounds, who hold different values and possess different traits under one union, merging them as both one, leaving them with the life long struggle of reconciling their differences with time

I just taya undecided

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by virtuedagirl(f): 9:03am On Dec 18, 2017
[quote author=Radiant1020 post=63381851]

It'll be difficult for a woman to please you
grin grin grin cheesy cheesy

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by LordOfNaira: 9:06am On Dec 18, 2017
Marriage has taught me a lot in just 5 months. One of what it has done is humble me. The early weeks were trying but we both put in our all to make it work.

Good points, OP. I think the truth is that one should be lucky enough to get a good woman/partner. If you marry a demon, she would read this list, hiss and leave the thread and still go about exhibiting the bad behavior.

I am lucky to have my wife. The best woman in the world.

2 Likes

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by remsonik(f): 9:07am On Dec 18, 2017
emmie14:

Immaturity is your only problem. Till you exhaust your presumed perfection and remain single then you will understand .
Before you insult her read her post over and over again

1 Like

Re: Mistake Married Women Make by MhizzAJ(f): 9:15am On Dec 18, 2017
omooba969:


All the points or some?

How are you? cool
Am fine omooba969
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by shaybebaby(f): 9:27am On Dec 18, 2017
TimeMod3:
That bitch, i pity her husband.


#NoBitchAttitude
And he has no clue you even exist. Save it!
Re: Mistake Married Women Make by newslifeop: 9:31am On Dec 18, 2017
Hmmm

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