₦airaland Forum

Blackfyre:
If you kindly proceed down to the end of the first page, you will see a quote from the book of proverbs that perfectly explains it...

Sorry to ask, but are u not the same guy from FTRebirth thread?

poik:
Some may say it's about the man, but I say its about what he does.

Your boyfriend is a betnaija addict and you let him?

Your boyfriend is an idolater and you didn't talk him out of it?


Come easy, go easy.

Prov 30:11Proverbs 13:11 (KJV) Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.


Its not him; its the spirit behind gambling.

Word!!!.....Though i bet for fun but that passage u quote is the Real Mvp. Though i made cool profit from betting but i really wanna stop it since i'm the only one in my family that indulge on it.

Blackfyre:
If you kindly proceed down to the end of the first page, you will see a quote from the book of proverbs that perfectly explains it...

Thanks baba that passage calls for deep reflection, thanks for pointing it out,

baddooski:
Sorry to ask, but are u not the same guy from FTRebirth thread?

Why are you being sorry?

I am the one and only from the ashewo thread, why do you ask?

baddooski:
Thanks baba that passage calls for deep reflection, thanks for pointing it out,

Indeed, you welcome.

makydebbie:
Asin!

And they'll be banking on emotions and other unnecessary necessities.

...hoping that he/she would change later on when they probably get married.

Incrizz:
No, I wasn't been sarcastic. How?
@bolded I have been trying to understand how this generalisation came about?
Do you mean that the term "slay queen" is some one who uses her sexuality to get money from men?
Because what I understand is that a slay queen is a beautiful girl who is fashion forward?

But its not an unfair generalization. Many girls who are into such are slay queens, I.e they wear the latest styles (and you know nudity is in vogue) and are very active on social media. Because a great percentage of such slay queens haggle over the price of sex and demand for recharge cards once you make the mistake of chatting with them, people formed that image of them. Sure there are many girls with their own money who love to look good and upload it, but they're in the minority

Blackfyre:
Picture that sort of female we were talking about earlier.

Now she is the type that is liberal. You know in terms of spirituality she is just, is as it comes. How do you make such person see spirituality as we discussed on that thread that talked about the sacredness of sex and its spiritual implications when she basically sees it as an activity that both parties enjoy and nothing more.

I don't know if you get what i am driving at because i can't seem to find the right words to explain. But basically, her spiritualty is non existent so to speak? Most attempts at trying to make her see is termed being sanctimonious or trying to force things upon her.

Do you think there is any success? How best do you think one could approach female on that front? Should one just desist entirely from such undertaking.
Especially since there seems to be a constant friction on such things...

I understand.

One thing I can tell you is,
One plants, another waters but it's God that gives the increase.
If God does not open her eyes, there's nothing you can do about it. You can only plant or water, it's only God (and love) that can change a man.

You can't make her see.
But God can.
So, you can pray.
So that God can do The Work.

If she knows how deeply you're rooted to your faith and how you're never going to compromise no matter whose Ox is gored, she may likely want to give it a thought.

Yes there is success but I worry if you're using the right tool, "love".
Love speaks by actions.
By "actions" or "love", I don't mean the boy-girl thing but the Christlike one.

A true life story:
A guy who was brought up to fear God met and fell in love with a liberal girl.
He told his mother about it because she had brought them up in the fear of God.
They also knew that marrying someone who was not saved was a no go area for them in that house, not out of fear but out of understanding.

Here's what he did after consulting with the Mum.
He called his girl and reminded her of his love for her but how that his love for Jesus supersedes and how that it was important for him to obey Him.

He reminded her about the love of Christ, His death and resurrection and told her she needed to find Christ for herself, that the relationship can't terminate in marriage and that he was setting her free.
He was being honest.

But surprisingly, she started searching and asking questions and found God for herself. They reunited. They got married

Yours may end this way, it may not.
But the Mum had been praying for years for her kids maritally.

I hope it helps....

But my question is, why are you trying to change her. Why not love her for who she is?

BenShammer:
But its not an unfair generalization. Many girls who are into such are slay queens, I.e they wear the latest styles (and you know nudity is in vogue) and are very active on social media. Because a great percentage of such slay queens haggle over the price of sex and demand for recharge cards once you make the mistake of chatting with them, people formed that image of them. Sure there are many girls with their own money who love to look good and upload it, but they're in the minority

Okay...
But I hear it guys who are doing it. As per, hiding behind such profiles to extort?

Incrizz:
I understand.

One thing I can tell you is,
One plants, another waters but it's God that gives the increase.
If God does not open her eyes, there's nothing you can do about it. You can only plant or water, it's only God (and love) that can change a man.

You can't make her see.
But God can.
So, you can pray.
So that God can do The Work.

If she knows how deeply you're rooted to your faith and how you're never going to compromise no matter whose Ox is gored, she may likely want to give it a thought.

Yes there is success but I worry if you're using the right tool, "love".
Love speaks by actions.
By "actions" or "love", I don't mean the boy-girl thing but the Christlike one.

A true life story:
A guy who was brought up to fear God met and fell in love with a liberal girl.
He told his mother about it because she had brought them up in the fear of God.
They also knew that marrying someone who was not saved was a no go area for them in that house, not out of fear but out of understanding.

Here's what he did after consulting with the Mum.
He called his girl and reminded her of his love for her but how that his love for Jesus supersedes and how that it was important for him to obey Him.

He reminded her about the love of Christ, His death and resurrection and told her she needed to find Christ for herself, that the relationship can't terminate in marriage and that he was setting her free.
He was being honest.

But surprisingly, she started searching and asking questions and found God for herself. They reunited. They got married

Yours may end this way, it may not.
But the Mum had been praying for years for her kids maritally.

I hope it helps....

But my question is, why are you trying to change her. Why not love her for who she is?

it sure more than helps, it showed my errors. you are very right about only God can make anyone see for themselves and that, i learned through the hard way.

As to that last question, because love will not be enough to make it work, God's approval matters most. Lets say your advice came after the lesson had been learned tho..

However thanks a lot and may God continue to bless you. Tremendously grateful.

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.

Sorry to say your story sound all ficticious to me. How can a man in this era lavish all his money frivolously on beer and mere follies. I think your mission is to mislead ladies out their. and create a negative impression about men who are in similar state.

Alexsmith20:
Sorry to say your story sound all ficticious to me. How can a man in this era lavish all his money frivolously on beer and mere follies. I think your mission is to mislead ladies out their. and create a negative impression about men who are in similar state.

I thought I was the only one who noticed!

I am willing the give benefit of the doubt in a best case scenario that this story is true but girls like the OP who shout stories like this from the rooftops will claim ignorance of how Girls also Betray good Men !

Some guys are like that

You should have called him to verified rather than been at logger-head.

someone preached about wealth gotten illegally and stuff even quoted the bible to support that...well, one question...logically speaking what wealth can be gotten cleanly? besides, like mikolo80 said...I believe the guy just used you and may still continue doing that if you aren't wise enough....I don't see how a guy who really loves and has plans for you would cut you off when he had just a little fortune......I mean it goea a long way to explain to you that it's either you are with an opportunistic fellow or he just sees you as just another money bag...."afterall she's only good for sex and bringing money". wk,I believe you have to draw limits with this guy....for those saying sportsbet is evil and vanity...stop deceiving yourselves.....that's my own onepiece....

sisisioge:
Whew! Na today? I think the matrix is really simple to understand. If you must date a broke guy, date the one with potential, class and good exposure. It is important he considers you a partner with these attributes as well. This is because when anyone(male/female) moves up a ladder, it is only natural for him/her to acquire things/friends/companies within the new status. Hence the reason it is important to pitch one's tent with a guy with an innate class, not the one that buys class with money.


I can imagine the tasteless dude's desire to be seen as arrived when in fact he was still in transit. Count your luck biko...a lot of husbands do that to their wives these days.

This lady is "Nulli Seconds" Phew!

ramzythecoder:
This lady is "Nulli Seconds" Phew!

Thanks ...happy Sunday.

Blackfyre:
it sure more than helps, it showed my errors. you are very right about only God can make anyone see for themselves and that, i learned through the hard way.

As to that last question, because love will not be enough to make it work, God's approval matters most. Lets say your advice came after the lesson had been learned tho..

However thanks a lot and may God continue to bless you. Tremendously grateful.

Thanks...

Missali:
Neither, what I mean is that men clamour for women who would stick with them through thick and thin without eventually playing out their roles when it comes down to it.

This same guys comes online to rant about women who ain't loyal and all that as if, they are.

this your story is not enough to conclude or advise girls not to stand by their guys.

*D guy may not love you like you love him
*He may b using you to "pass" time
*He may b the ungrateful type
*He may have distracted and needed you to call him to order once his friend told you
*You may b one of those gold diggers dat fabricated this story to justify your gold digging.......

sisisioge:
Thanks ...happy Sunday.

Same to you and Happy new year in advance .

HeWrites:
Neither do you

Actually, she does..., and very much so!

lilmax:
all guys aren't the same, that's a fact



didn't work for you doesn't mean it won't work for others

I think she made it clear that she already knows that.

Incrizz:
Okay...
But I hear it guys who are doing it. As per, hiding behind such profiles to extort?

In a few cases, yes. Majority are just girls that feel entitled to demand for money from guys because of their sexuality

Mypeople2:
Hello lady, I don't seem to like this act of yours. Please don't use what happened to you to blindfold the good ladies .There is a way a lady will support a struggling guy that he won't forget her when he finally "hammer".If you are just there with him but you constantly remind him by your actions or words that he is broke, he is going to forget you when the money finally comes.There is no way , a guy will forget a good lady that has been standing with him.So forget about what you are trying to portray here

Exactly

zainmaxwell:
yes na u don't expect me to treat u well when you are up to no good as d girl if she sure say na she be d original one or maybe she self na side chic

true talk.

zainmaxwell:
bro na d fact be dat

yes bro, meanwhile happy new Year in advance.

xendra:
the good guy who also want to look like bad guys ?

seems like you are following the thread from page to page

okay, hahaha, not really, just viewing important quotes.

Blackfyre:
Why you no feel am?
The way you take reply na

hahahah, so how do you want me to reply?

bitchcrafts:
Thank you for your unsolicited advice okay, have a nice day!

okay bro, happy new in some hours time.

STILESGANG:
Your boyfriend won a million naira and the first thing he did was abscond with another girl and blow the money off.Who does that..it's either the guy was never into you or this story is just pure bullshit made up by a slay quuen to justify their gold digging tendencies

Moreover i don't understand.Is standing by a man when he is broke a job or why do girls think they deserve compensation for it?
.If I can make it any girl should be able to,or what was the girl doing why I was trying to better my condition?Having sex with me and squeezing the little change I have out of my hands?

I would never tell a girl to stand by me if I was broke and those who want to stay should realize that I don't owe them anything if I hit the gold.

What nonsense

I love what you just said! Though I don't know how you managed to enter my mind and steal my thoughts, this is almost I'd have said on this platform.. I really like people like you who are factual!

Missali:
Chronic retards indeed, I already modified his comment. He certainly is not referring to me.

Honestly,I like ur sense of reasoning,judgement and maturity with the way u handled ur boyfriend and some degrading comments here in this forum. It really goes a long way to speak volume of ur kinda rare personality. I think you have got this uncommon sense in ur dealings with humans but here online and offline.
So sorry for evrytin,It is very pathetic but I do still have to remind you that all guys aint same. You just have to lick ur wounds and move on. Some people dont really appreciate the good in others. Quit feeling bad,you will def. meet who is worth you.
By the way,where do you reside in Ph..we could sit out whenever I come into town if you dont mind.