Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by igudia5(m): 5:41pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Coconut fall on that guy# when I'm upset nairaland is my cure(laughing hard) 1 Like |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Donvalentino(m): 5:44pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
futoite 1 Like |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by bhadboy: 5:54pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Over make sense..... Abeg your story is always needed here. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by hibeekay007(m): 6:00pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
op, if someone tells you that you're a good story writer again nd you say thanks, thunder wee fire you!.. this story was someone's experience shared about two weeks ago nd the op is busy saying thanks for another man's experience.. i never knew they plagiarized experiences again oo.. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Lalas247(f): 6:01pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Hmmm Summary please |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by queenfav(f): 6:11pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Wow.. You had me laughing really hard here. Trust me, you are good. As a warri babe e no dey easy to make me laugh based on say everybody na comedian for area.Thumbs up bro! 2 Likes |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by iamjames2222: 6:15pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
lol.....u r so gud guy. u r very creative in writing. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by CyberGypsy(m): 6:33pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
i don laugh tire .. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by CyberGypsy(m): 6:34pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
hibeekay007: op, if someone tells you that you're a good story writer again nd you say thanks, thunder wee fire you!.. this story was someone's experience shared about two weeks ago nd the op is busy saying thanks for another man's experience.. i never knew they plagiarized experiences again oo.. lwkmh |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Nobody: 6:39pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
You mean someone sat down to type all these? |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Streetmade(m): 6:51pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
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Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by samuelizz(m): 6:52pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Damn! |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by tohpahz(f): 7:01pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
You stole the Guy's story too well. And ya collecting his glory sha. Chai.. Ole. Next time acknowledge the real author. 3 Likes |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by cuvox(m): 7:28pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
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Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by cuvox(m): 7:30pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
tohpahz: You stole the Guy's story too well. And ya collecting his glory sha. Chai.. Ole. Next time acknowledge the real author. Blame the readers too. They are obviously ignoring the source op posted. And op... Stop collecting the glory na. That's how people who create blogs and plagiarize contents started |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by DEIFIED(m): 7:33pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
currently busy, will probably read latter. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Paradigme777: 7:36pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
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Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by kelzgie: 8:23pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
CARLOSZ: This is a story of how one babe wanted to kill me with sexual enjoyment.
Brothers, stay woke.Forget forming coitus Jagaban and Igodo part 1: conqueror of the evil forest.There are some babes you'll Jam, you sef go believe.
It is sad that this also involves my friend Progress.
I was in my room, in final year, when he comes in and says we should go hangout and drink because "you know. No beer in heaven
Baba had invited a babe and she was coming with her friend (private uni babe on hols) whom he wanted me to meet, say na my spec. I agreed when he showed me the friend's picture cos the babe was confirmed doctor's prescription and Lord knows I was not feeling fine
Got to Eismann, saw the babe and Blood of Nebuchadnezzar!!! She was even better looking in person. I became worried like what will Progress want in return? What's wrong with the babe? Is she okay? But once we got talking, I was smitten. The babe make Sen(10)se www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505528_img20180104124304_jpega4a6d5af01185ebbe624879751326816
Up next you know the usual: follow up. Calls, pings[bbm was the shit then]. We were flowing like river Niger but babe was giving me mixed signals. Today, we'll be sweet and all, next day she'll be all ' new phone who's this?'
�
We liked each other. So kilonshele gan gan.
One cool evening, we strolled to Love garden, picked one serene spot and I laid it all down.
"Why don't you want me? Is it my Big head? Don't you like me? Is it another guy? Tell me"
All of this i said with the best 'why are you wickeding me like this face i could muster.
Men as i was telling it all, babe bowed her head. You know when your talk don dey enter the white blood cells. I was deeply convinced my breakthrough was here. My miracle was on the way. That finally �favour is my name�
She lifted her face nd looked me straight in the eye.
Men for like three minutes babe just dey look me for eye. I was afraid men. At a point, be like her eye wanted to be changing color to indigo.
Ha! God abeg o! Na just small love we wan love which kind an eye for an eye staring contest be this?
Next thing she said. Steve let's just be friends. You can't handle what i bring to the table. It's been a problem with other guys. Pls.
My spirit man was like www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505551_img20180104124812_jpege4800264f2bfd272bbb4dfdf9d6e6c4f
I had not recovered 4rm dat 1 wen she said
'For dis to work, tell me. Are you sure? Really sure You're great in bed'
Hei� dis babe has touched the tail of not one but two Lions. Me? A sexual Vuga. An intercoursal IGODO? Mr all Night Long? Kai see question
In response, I held her gaze for like 7mins instead of d 3mins she did. B4 speaking, i ensured my eye had changed to red [ her fada! All of us sabi form look] www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505559_img20180104125032_jpeg7adc9967df562dec91ebc998b800234d
Then I said something romantic, along the lines of I wanted her more than her body. Blah blah.yada yada
But in my realest of real mind. I'm like U! Iwo! Ah! You wee see cameroon pepper.
You wee smeh ya yansh www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505575_img20180104125219_jpeg1b38f2e7200b9a7ce3e0b3eb688a2316
We kissed Relationship started.
I had tried to form let's not rush things so it won't look like the sex was what i was after.
But sis showed up at my house one weather for 2 day like Destiny can be delayed not denied.
Enough of this waiting.
From kissing then came Bolaji aka B.J. she worked her black magic repete making me shed a tear like a child whose caprisonne they collected
I too returned the favor and ate a full plate of Isiewu. Amem somebody? Emem
Then it Began. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505593_img20180104125440_jpegaad38409384322b36779b17662869a26
I knew there was problem wen smtin we started at 10, by 4am, afta i had cum abi arrived almost 3ce, i realised madam had not even left her bustop yet.
To make matters worse, tired as I was, small touch here nd there she did, it rose again.
Homaigot!
What a betrayal penis www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505601_img20180104130258_jpeg8fdb3a9ecadbe405acd0f834bb60e2cf
I was dying
But babe kept riding me kpacha kpacha kpacha like those old ladies bicycle.
To worsen things. Morning no gree reach. My village people ensured we had longer 9t shorter day, cos after wat seemed like 10hours of riding it was just 5.22
Kee me plix www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505607_img20180104130517_jpeg38962b57e291a8733e9efe76886b94b6
Later when we switched positions, Aunty was shouting. I'm cumming, I'm coming 4 u baby'
Meanwhile me In my mind I'm like aunty I'm Going o. Going going gone too soon
I could see my headstone clearly
Here lies a man who died on Top[ nd world people will think i died a great man]
Eventually somewhere close to 6am. We slept. More like she slept. While me I slept like
Hei Gawd! I don leave dog go let the lion out. Correct simba and scar. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505411_img20180104130720_jpeg3484b866485cbb6ac14094172f380fe3
7am hand don begin touch me. Her mouth heading 4 my nether region to christen me Bolaji again.
FUNKE! I shouted.
And dis my people was my life 4 the next month. Day and 9t.
I go lecture come back; sex Our eyes jam; We mekwe
She hear se. B4 you complete it as seconds; mekwe www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505459_img20180104131319_jpegd6859b99028c7414ce2b96ae1bb5fb2f
We go downstairs go buy something.when we return we congratulate ourself with sex.
We dey wait for water for tea to boil. We wait with sex.
Babe had excess energy,drive,zeal,passion and ambition for sex like who drink Alomo plus monkey tail, the shoulder, heart and kidney. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505467_img20180104132102_jpegfaebe7254347f235e5ee4fb4ff883f4a
Omo i was slimming down.
People will see me like, man this your final yr project is taking its toll on you oh.
At a point i was even praying to see my period.maybe madam will free me
I'm like lawd pls. Let this bucket/Drum pass over me. I'm someone's shild for gossakes. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505472_img20180104132300_jpega7938aa2b8ee0a13ff117c0590a6d041
Babe even came 1 day like boo let's spice things up. Let's take weed.
I'm like see your patience ozokwor village aunty face.
Ogun! Of spice kee you dia!
Ordinary feels lyk who took Spanish fly. Now u wnt 2 add weed nd unleash d full spanish animal kingdom ba? www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505483_img20180104132422_jpeg134cddb98c0307f134bce5b3f64587ed
Wen I knew dis nonsense mst stop was wen we went 2 fellowship nd topic was fornication.Babe looked so remorseful
My shock wen we got back nd babe was like boo, kitty's back needs scratching.
Ahn! ahn! the word neva scratch kitty reach?
Kitty wen just come from church? www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505493_img20180104132606_jpeg2833454e506510f6f3b0101fb43e05fb
Afta a month and of everyday sex babe was finally leaving for school in a week
My spirit man shouted a victorious cha cha cha igbo kwenu
But before she left,
She wanted to do it everywhere nd way.People style, doggy style nd believe me tortoise get style; she showed me.
Man! when she left for school, after a while, had to hit her with the it's not you it's me line.Even Jaguda get Oga.
I cannot cum and go and kee myself.
Also called Progress like guy 4 your full life no ever say you see my spec again. Tueh! Animal!
If you ever try am eh www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505505_img20180104132908_jpeg4ab5f9e1ee36c8c5935a508d118536cc
The End
Cc lalasticlala seun mynd44 https://twitter.com/ItsUncleStephen/status/946410108027891712 Lol.. .. This one na wetin runtown sing 'and if she follow me go na enjoyment go kill am o'.. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Nobody: 8:35pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
kelzgie:
Lol.. .. This one na wetin runtown sing 'and if she follow me go na enjoyment go kill am o'.. another goat on the loose |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by kelzgie: 8:45pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
lilbest4: another goat on the loose Is this one okay??.. Behave yourself... |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Bossontop(m): 8:52pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Damn...such a nyc piece U na boss |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by alfred007(m): 9:06pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
futoite! |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Nobody: 9:11pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
You just described my ex side chick |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by donnaD(f): 9:49pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
Kia my belle oo.guy u are gud. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by otodeluxe(m): 9:51pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
It has hapenned to me before. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by blacq2009(m): 10:32pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
I'm so in love with your piece. Humor is your second name. Keep it up. It cracked me up, honestly. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by hernandson(m): 11:02pm On Jan 04, 2018 |
this is the best threat and hilarious thread I ever read,mehn I developed a cough after all the laughing |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by bughead: 12:51am On Jan 05, 2018 |
CARLOSZ: This is a story of how one babe wanted to kill me with sexual enjoyment.
Brothers, stay woke.Forget forming coitus Jagaban and Igodo part 1: conqueror of the evil forest.There are some babes you'll Jam, you sef go believe.
It is sad that this also involves my friend Progress.
I was in my room, in final year, when he comes in and says we should go hangout and drink because "you know. No beer in heaven
Baba had invited a babe and she was coming with her friend (private uni babe on hols) whom he wanted me to meet, say na my spec. I agreed when he showed me the friend's picture cos the babe was confirmed doctor's prescription and Lord knows I was not feeling fine
Got to Eismann, saw the babe and Blood of Nebuchadnezzar!!! She was even better looking in person. I became worried like what will Progress want in return? What's wrong with the babe? Is she okay? But once we got talking, I was smitten. The babe make Sen(10)se www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505528_img20180104124304_jpega4a6d5af01185ebbe624879751326816
Up next you know the usual: follow up. Calls, pings[bbm was the shit then]. We were flowing like river Niger but babe was giving me mixed signals. Today, we'll be sweet and all, next day she'll be all ' new phone who's this?'
�
We liked each other. So kilonshele gan gan.
One cool evening, we strolled to Love garden, picked one serene spot and I laid it all down.
"Why don't you want me? Is it my Big head? Don't you like me? Is it another guy? Tell me"
All of this i said with the best 'why are you wickeding me like this face i could muster.
Men as i was telling it all, babe bowed her head. You know when your talk don dey enter the white blood cells. I was deeply convinced my breakthrough was here. My miracle was on the way. That finally �favour is my name�
She lifted her face nd looked me straight in the eye.
Men for like three minutes babe just dey look me for eye. I was afraid men. At a point, be like her eye wanted to be changing color to indigo.
Ha! God abeg o! Na just small love we wan love which kind an eye for an eye staring contest be this?
Next thing she said. Steve let's just be friends. You can't handle what i bring to the table. It's been a problem with other guys. Pls.
My spirit man was like www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505551_img20180104124812_jpege4800264f2bfd272bbb4dfdf9d6e6c4f
I had not recovered 4rm dat 1 wen she said
'For dis to work, tell me. Are you sure? Really sure You're great in bed'
Hei� dis babe has touched the tail of not one but two Lions. Me? A sexual Vuga. An intercoursal IGODO? Mr all Night Long? Kai see question
In response, I held her gaze for like 7mins instead of d 3mins she did. B4 speaking, i ensured my eye had changed to red [ her fada! All of us sabi form look] www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505559_img20180104125032_jpeg7adc9967df562dec91ebc998b800234d
Then I said something romantic, along the lines of I wanted her more than her body. Blah blah.yada yada
But in my realest of real mind. I'm like U! Iwo! Ah! You wee see cameroon pepper.
You wee smeh ya yansh www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505575_img20180104125219_jpeg1b38f2e7200b9a7ce3e0b3eb688a2316
We kissed Relationship started.
I had tried to form let's not rush things so it won't look like the sex was what i was after.
But sis showed up at my house one weather for 2 day like Destiny can be delayed not denied.
Enough of this waiting.
From kissing then came Bolaji aka B.J. she worked her black magic repete making me shed a tear like a child whose caprisonne they collected
I too returned the favor and ate a full plate of Isiewu. Amem somebody? Emem
Then it Began. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505593_img20180104125440_jpegaad38409384322b36779b17662869a26
I knew there was problem wen smtin we started at 10, by 4am, afta i had cum abi arrived almost 3ce, i realised madam had not even left her bustop yet.
To make matters worse, tired as I was, small touch here nd there she did, it rose again.
Homaigot!
What a betrayal penis www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505601_img20180104130258_jpeg8fdb3a9ecadbe405acd0f834bb60e2cf
I was dying
But babe kept riding me kpacha kpacha kpacha like those old ladies bicycle.
To worsen things. Morning no gree reach. My village people ensured we had longer 9t shorter day, cos after wat seemed like 10hours of riding it was just 5.22
Kee me plix www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505607_img20180104130517_jpeg38962b57e291a8733e9efe76886b94b6
Later when we switched positions, Aunty was shouting. I'm cumming, I'm coming 4 u baby'
Meanwhile me In my mind I'm like aunty I'm Going o. Going going gone too soon
I could see my headstone clearly
Here lies a man who died on Top[ nd world people will think i died a great man]
Eventually somewhere close to 6am. We slept. More like she slept. While me I slept like
Hei Gawd! I don leave dog go let the lion out. Correct simba and scar. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505411_img20180104130720_jpeg3484b866485cbb6ac14094172f380fe3
7am hand don begin touch me. Her mouth heading 4 my nether region to christen me Bolaji again.
FUNKE! I shouted.
And dis my people was my life 4 the next month. Day and 9t.
I go lecture come back; sex Our eyes jam; We mekwe
She hear se. B4 you complete it as seconds; mekwe www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505459_img20180104131319_jpegd6859b99028c7414ce2b96ae1bb5fb2f
We go downstairs go buy something.when we return we congratulate ourself with sex.
We dey wait for water for tea to boil. We wait with sex.
Babe had excess energy,drive,zeal,passion and ambition for sex like who drink Alomo plus monkey tail, the shoulder, heart and kidney. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505467_img20180104132102_jpegfaebe7254347f235e5ee4fb4ff883f4a
Omo i was slimming down.
People will see me like, man this your final yr project is taking its toll on you oh.
At a point i was even praying to see my period.maybe madam will free me
I'm like lawd pls. Let this bucket/Drum pass over me. I'm someone's shild for gossakes. www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505472_img20180104132300_jpega7938aa2b8ee0a13ff117c0590a6d041
Babe even came 1 day like boo let's spice things up. Let's take weed.
I'm like see your patience ozokwor village aunty face.
Ogun! Of spice kee you dia!
Ordinary feels lyk who took Spanish fly. Now u wnt 2 add weed nd unleash d full spanish animal kingdom ba? www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505483_img20180104132422_jpeg134cddb98c0307f134bce5b3f64587ed
Wen I knew dis nonsense mst stop was wen we went 2 fellowship nd topic was fornication.Babe looked so remorseful
My shock wen we got back nd babe was like boo, kitty's back needs scratching.
Ahn! ahn! the word neva scratch kitty reach?
Kitty wen just come from church? www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505493_img20180104132606_jpeg2833454e506510f6f3b0101fb43e05fb
Afta a month and of everyday sex babe was finally leaving for school in a week
My spirit man shouted a victorious cha cha cha igbo kwenu
But before she left,
She wanted to do it everywhere nd way.People style, doggy style nd believe me tortoise get style; she showed me.
Man! when she left for school, after a while, had to hit her with the it's not you it's me line.Even Jaguda get Oga.
I cannot cum and go and kee myself.
Also called Progress like guy 4 your full life no ever say you see my spec again. Tueh! Animal!
If you ever try am eh www.nairaland.com/attachments/6505505_img20180104132908_jpeg4ab5f9e1ee36c8c5935a508d118536cc
The End
Cc lalasticlala seun mynd44 https://twitter.com/ItsUncleStephen/status/946410108027891712 I feel like quoting long story for no damn reason 1 Like |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Smeeky(m): 1:31am On Jan 05, 2018 |
CARLOSZ:
Thanks
[[Check source above]] ↑ Dude...why are you taking credit for another person's Twitter story posted on Linda Ikeji. This shit is not interesting without Memes the guy used. |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by Kingsley10000: 1:39am On Jan 05, 2018 |
GOOD 1 |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by JimmyCrow(m): 2:29am On Jan 05, 2018 |
Nice write up..got yourself a follower |
Re: How A Girl Wanted To Kill Me With Sexual Enjoyment by songzDaniel01(m): 6:28am On Jan 05, 2018 |
CaptainG00D:
Lol sweet story... hut is it a real life? it's like Ur brain is melting, why would u quote the entire thing , |