eyinjuege:


Only one person has no ovulation, blocked tubes, fibroids.
For every point raised here, you have a counter argument.

Just last week, you claim to have married a new wife, who is joining you in Abuja.
So many important stories you're coming up with when questioned which you never mentioned in your initial post.

Are you sure you're not just making things up as points are being raised?

He is making them up just to score some cheap points.

Mr. Fruitful husband, all these problems u mentioned can be treated. Fibroid can be removed, fallopian tube can be unblocked and if she is ot ovulating, she can be treated and d ovulation will come, so what is ur excuse?

What was ur diagnosis, tell us so we can also advice u on how to get treatment because I believe u must have been testing dff women yet non have been pregnant for u

Kids who don't understand the meaning of marriage entering into marriage. Building a house without your consent is not enough reason to divorce her except there are other things which you are not telling us. In the first place, let's address the foundation. If your people rejected her, why did you go ahead with marrying her. If nobody forced her on you, then you must as a man take the responsiblity of your action. She's your wife, try and to know why she's behaving that way. Don't let the opinion of outsiders ruin your relationship. Be a man, confront every challenges posing as a threat to your family. Women are emotional beings and they tend to easily yield or give in to situations around them. She maybe passing through trauma and shame of not conceiving after 6yrs of marriage hence prompting her to make a decision to relocate. Though she should have consulted you but you don't have to hold it against her for too long. Try to treat her well and she'd open up to you because it seems like there's a communication gap between you and her. If you treat a woman like a queen, she'd treat you like a king.

NoToPile:





Don't mind my pokenosing, but why are you terrified? Besides it really is not 'manipulating' in the real sense of it.

Lol. Cos she collected her money back (probably with interest) and her husband doesn't realise it. No stress, no argument but she has made her profit. Simple. I respect that.

GrammarCheck:


You should be more supportive. I married in 2009, I had multiple cysts, no ovulation as well. I ran from pillar to post. Did all sorts of treatment. Finally, after 5 years my husband said STOP! Let's just STOP and enjoy our lives. My mother in law said STOP, let go and let God. I had a support system that made me feel not having a baby is not the end of the world. Doctors said I should come for IVF, they saw one blocked tube. Hubby said no. Infact, he took me abroad for a long awaited honeymoon, after 5yrs. I came back pregnant, even he wasnt expecting it. He said it was too sudden. Can you imagine After delivery, got pregnant with another baby the following month. My two deliveries were 10months interval. With no ovulation.

My husband refused to touch me after the 2nd pregnancy. Said I was a magnet. Took counselling for him to finally come close. He has been begging me not to get pregnant again, but I want twins
With no ovulation.

As I am, I get a period once in 6mths, without intervention. I only know I'm pregnant because I start vomiting. Because there is no period to say 'I missed my period'.

My point is... Be patient, and work with your woman. Who said God cannot turn around a situation? You have given up on your wife, and that is not Godly.

Can two work together except they agree? You need to put away the strange woman and work with your wife. You have only been married 6 years. There is a lifetime ahead of you. These are just bumps along the way.

If I tell you the one my husband did to me. I asked him to inspect a property. He said it was good, he liked the area, it is something he has been looking for. As a the doting wife, I gave him the money to help me buy it. He bought it in his name. The world has not ended. I was angry, but he has my mumu button.

As we are, I have used sense to collect back the money over time. I never said, give me back my money. But for everything I send a budget for, I inflate the cost. Even money for the schoolchool fees, diapers and food. I am shopping for another property which I will buy in my name. I will tell him, for info purposes only. This life is wisdom. So I should have divorced him because he played a fast one on me?

When I confronted him, he said I am a woman, I should be submissive. Ok, in submission, no problem, we will meet on the bed at night, where he cannot say no to my demands.

This beautiful piece changed my mind. God bless u

jasper83:
.


Bros I salute your courage and victory, may God bless your new job, happiness and whatever makes you happy. Don't allow any rubbish person make you unhappy or angry about your decision, you have taken the best decision of your life because anybody that life gives a second chance like you 98% of the time excel exceedingly.

When the time is right I have a story to share too, majority of females are opportunist and self centered, I have learned in hard way that love is not everything but mere feelings that can grow well if nurtured with right person. Guys beware " EMOTION IS NOTHING BUT A KILLER". Lets see marriage as a contract to be given to best qualified individuals, no sentiment attached.

Congrats bro, u have escaped may God delivered the rest of us from the hands of evil,destiny delaying demons. Peace out!!!

Best comment on this post only few will understand the bolded and see reason I give ur comment the best( to me me anyway)

Brugo:


Lol. Cos she collected her money back (probably with interest) and her husband doesn't realise it. No stress, no argument but she has made her profit. Simple. I respect that.

No need to fear now.

A lot of women don't know the kind of influence they have, just normal influence power. The man will exert authority, the woman will just keep calm let him shout and show he is 'the man' then influence him to do her bidding quietly with or without him realizing it.

It's one of the silent powers women have.

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

Did you read the part he said he gave her #800k for the roofing after the deception? And when he tested her by asking for for #20k she refused despite having a balance of #200k. Some women is to take all they can and jump ship if the man find himself in a situation when he is not able to provide as much in the future.

[quote author=alizma post=64262639][/quote]



So that one na blame,I just quote his mistakes anyway I can't judge without hearing from other person

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

and she told him because a "pastor" told her to do so. Most women are the ones that let people like freeze insult pastors. How do you reason? People maintain the houses.. did he boast about the 2 houses. Call a spade a spade. This is a woman that has hurt a man here.you are all about and so?? Who is against a woman building? Why didn't she tell her hubby? Why did she deny? She couldn't tell a right from wrong until she talked to a pastor. Please think well.

safarigirl:
loyalty begets loyalty. This man has been cheating on his wife, would you be loyal to a man you know is cheating on you?

He has been cheating and expects the wife to just fold her hands and watch everything taken away from her.

He has been cheating yet no pregnancy or babies from his side chic meaning he is the one who is infertile.

Man, go and check urself jor.


I give the woman three gbosa. Her head dey there. No be this 21st woman go mumu till she enter grave

Iseoluwani:



So u bleeped d new wife... Mehn una no get Patience oo

Bro i can't blame Adamrealman78 it has happened to me too, though slightly different from his. Though I don't like adultery

keepingmum:


I just realised theres no point carrying on .....you already have another wife.....their in lies your wife's action

na d woman no get another husband for lagos

To me, you are looking for ways to justify your unfaithfulness. Before a woman can do such she must have seen your unpredictability and possibly your irrationality. Thumbs up for her, she's smarter than you think. Excuses such as your parents non acceptance of her is a bullshit. Marital survival is not based on excuses as these. .Success in marriage is the ability of the two people involved commitment. I can see that to you marriage is not for better for worse. How I wish we could here your wifey' s side of the story! Good luck to the unfortunate girl who thought she has seen husband!!! Pansan ta fi na iyale..........,.. Your life your cup of coffee

cooker:
Are you a cheater?

Every man is a cheat, op clearly stated he is cheating anyways!

Glad d wife is wise, she has no future beside him.

Who knows, op may even be infertile, but he is here applauding himself for being wt a childless woman!

To me, you are looking for ways to justify your unfaithfulness. Before a woman can do such she must have seen your unpredictability and possibly your irrationality. Thumbs up for her, she's smarter than you think. Excuses such as your parents non acceptance of her is a bullshit. Marital survival is not based on excuses as these. .Success in marriage is the ability of the two people involved commitment. I can see that to you marriage is not for better for worse. How I wish we could here your wifey' s side of the story! Good luck to the unfortunate girl who thought she has seen husband!!! Pansan ta fi na iyale..........,.. Your life your cup of coffee. Men like you forming victim since that day of Adam.

you end the marriage the day you come up with the idea of renting a house for her in Lagos while you're at abuja.
with due respect sir, if you have good motive, you would have move with her to your resident in abuja


you expose a woman when you give her total freedom, do u know how many friends she would have made while in lagos? but there would have been a restrictions if she's staying with you overthere. I'm sure those friends corrupt her mind "evil communication they say, it corrupt good manners"


you're even angry because she's building a house, you never can tell if she has been cheating on you with another man. I just believe you guys ain't meant together, destiny just want to teach you a bitter experience of 6years of parental disobedience

Vyolet:
Imagine o, all these men know is to see that a woman suffers and loses in everything.
She has been married to you for 6years,no child, you went ahead to marry another woman which your wife is aware of,as well as all your other escapades all in a bid to father a child, now you expect her to carry you along in all her plans as who exactly? She moved on faster than you and doesn't want to be left behind. It will be her fault when she loses her marriage with no child nor any asset to compensate for the years she wasted with you. African women are getting wiser, the world does not revolve around men alone.

A piece of advice, check again to be sure you are not the one with infertility problem, once you new wife says she is pregnant, be sure to do a DNA test after the delivery.

wiser by building a house or building a home. Until you Africans stop seeing these materials things as the ultimate especially the women. You will never find happiness. Will she live in the house alone? Isn't marriage supposed to be a journey for 2. Wisdom is knowing what to do and doing it.

Adamrealman78:
,her test results show, blocked fallopian tubes, uterine fibroids and no ovulation.. What magic do you expect I do?

they think you ll be stupid to come on here if you are the one with a problem. It just shows the level of brain drain in t society.

Donald3d:
Hmm , this one is strong . Don't you think you are going overboard with this ?

My broda ask am

She is greedy and she will never change, the TRUTH of it is that she don't love you,with her building completed,she will no longer respect you,she will be hopping she will roof over her head if you Bleep up,just God intervention.

Adamrealman78:
I see responses saying I feel hurt for not telling me about her project! Wrong, I am happy about her success, but when a woman you support to be a success uses your kindness to elevate herself and wants to run you into penury.be wise,at a time she borrowed 400k for a project and I ended paying the loan,I sold my old car,borrowed another 300k to meet her needs.As a rule to make her feel loved, I never for once in 6yrs requested what I wanted.I made sure my provision for her needs are what she wanted.just imagine, I lost my old job in 2014.even without a job,I sold my assets to take care of the home. After making sure I was broke, she would leave me in the house with N200 to eat till she came back from the shop. When God now gave me a federal appointment in Abuja, she told me to resign and come back to Lagos. This is just the tip of the iceberg, if I talk more.I would break the Internet.

Ehnnnn, you say wetin?
She told you to resign from federal whaaaat? Sir, please you need your peace of mind. Are some women this wicked and heartless?
So she will prefer you sitting jobless in Lagos, or with one 50k salary, while she is getting bigger than you.
Sir, you need whatever makes you happy, do whatever makes you happy, please.

olisehcom:


You've been cheating on her all this time....and she knows.......she hasn't given u a child.......your family don't like her......



I don't blame her at all

why hasn't taken a walk since she isn't happy?? Is building a house an option if the marriage ends. Is it the solution to her barreness? Vanity upon vanity. Living a life of no impact!

FloraEC:


To be honest, I don't blame your wife. I wonder how many times you've called her barren maybe telling her, her tubes are blocked and she can't release an egg that's why she's not ovulating e.t.c

The magic you supposed to do is for her to undergo an operation to remove the uterine fibroid, tubal flushing or taking drugs for it and also taking drugs that aids ovulation. Did you do that?

And now you're trying to be all emotional, all of a sudden you remembered your parents warned you cos she borrowed herself sense to build a house since you and your family members obviously don't love her or accept her. Now you trying to blame her, calling her sorts of names so you'll garner sympathy.
I wish you the best with the girl you've already slept with and wants to marry, may she karashika your life very well.


Shalom

another foolish post. So why did she decide to build a house instead of using the money to treat herself. She is there waiting for a man that can impregnate another woman. She sshould keep waiting and keep building. Borrowed 800k to build but not to treat herself. She isn't bothered about childbearing. Who know if she has a womb.

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

God bless you.

THIS IS A VERY USELESS AND NONSENSE POST

keepingmum:
I dont understand what your anger is. She should have told you about the property shes building....YES
But have you built or acquired assets in your name alone during thr course of the marriage? Are ALL assets in the marriage acquired in both your names?
What is wrong in a woman owning a property to her name solely?
How has your relationship been during the course of your marriage?
Have you cheated ot given her course to doubt your loyalty and fidelity in the marriage?
Finally you talk about not beating or cursing her in the marriage.....are you expecting to be rewarded or given a medal?? Or you think its thr norm to be abusive to women?
You talk about maintaining 2 homes in lag and abuja so what about that? If you are tired relocate back to Lag or move your wife to Abj to join you.
There are people that maintain 4 homes ...one with the kids in uni...the other wifey stays there for work...3rd they stay there for their own work and then 4th extended family stays so what exactly are you doing that no other person has done?

Finally keep your family in check cos its clear from your write up your family has played a role in making your wife feel unsecured in her marriage

Amarabae:
You are overreacting!
Divorce is not the answer now.
But come to think of it, the money that she used in the building of house, she would have used some of them to adopt a child.

Good bless you. You are good woman.

madridguy:
Divorce is not the answer sir.

say what? Say it again? So allowing someone make a fool of you is the best? Over my dead body.

Adamrealman78:
,God shall bless every work of your hand. If I told her marriage is an effort of both partners, she would reply, that the Bible said a man should provide everything for the home. See brainwashing! Men please be aware of the use of religion to coerce in marriage

I feel your pain sir, I really do. Don't mind those people saying rubbish over there. They are mostly toddlers or those who have not experienced your situation. It would have been nice if you quit marrying her after seeing these signs in her. I saw this sign too in my babe who is now my ex by the grace of God. She has never given me 100naira before in the almost 3yrs of dating. I also thought like you too that she will change if I show more love and spend more but it even became worse. Am lucky am not married to her yet

Adamrealman78:
After marrying a girl against my parents wishes, for 6yrs with no child. I have never, cursed, abused or beaten her. I pay for two houses, one in Abuja and Lagos cos I work in Abuja. I provide for the home and pay her allowance and pay all utilities. She has a shop in Lagos.

I found out that she is building a house without informing me. I knew she did this cos she thought my family would chase her for her childlessness. I confronted her and she denied it for 7months. Only to own up after her pastor scolded her.

She wanted me to give her 800k to roof the house which I obliged. I now tested her by telling her to lend me 20k to sort out a small issue, only for her to tell me she can't afford to, in spite of a balance of over 200k in her account.

I quietly left the house for my base in Abuja, she didn't even escort me out of the bedroom. My relationship with her is over.

MEN, any woman you sacrifice for and she can't do the same for you is not worth it.

Another wife is not the solution at this stage Sir, it looks like it is, but think deeper, and you will know it isn't.
The new one may turn out worse than you ever imagined...... You legal wife probably did all that, in order to have something to fall back on (based on experience with other women).
I won't advice a divorce, as I am not the one in putting on the shoe right now.... but you really need time to cool your head.
Why not try to address the issue of her inability to get pregnant, do everything to make her have your child, you both need to relax and be stress free, in other to get pregnant.
I just feel if she carries your child, she will feel secured with your name...... but for now, she probably wants to secure something for herself.

just my 2 cents

Adamrealman78:
She can't change. I saw this attitude long ago,but thought pure love and affection could reform her.if I continue in the relationship, she would ruin me into debt.

She never loved you.

frozen70:

You dont know the poster from Adams, you were attacking him instead of the advice he needed.
He wasn't bracing that he maintains two homes he is just telling us the sacrifice he made for their comfort, though he wouldn't have said he has never beaten the wife that's not what a man should be proud of.
Yes its wrong for a wife to set up a building with out the knowledge of the husbands, but like the husband said that probably she is sensing danger because she is yet to give birth. I think the man should notify the wife family his intention to get separated or divorce their daughter ,it might not be easy but it's one of the way out.

God bless you. Another wise woman here. I am sure the lady refused to relocate to abuja because of her shop and house she is building. I love ladies that think like you.