₦airaland Forum

sekxyqueen:
I'm alright.

stay cool...

sekxyqueen:
lol..really,nl is full of comedians

lefulefu:
abi oo. How body na?

Alariiwo:
I will.. are you done with exams? Hope it went well

sekxyqueen:
wanna have a profound knowledge about this feminist of a thing..
as a feminist, what can you offer to the society..
?

Ladyhippolyta88:
They didn't beg you to give them a counsel and feminism is going nowhere if it was going to self destruct it would have years ago.

babasolution:
great post,i'll definitely be following this site

sekxyqueen:
lol..really,nl is full of comedians

sekxyqueen:
body is tied with clothes...


I'm just there..and you

Alariiwo:
Where are you now o jare

You don't want to cook, do laundry.. what else?
Maybe you'll leave the sex part for sex dolls too.
Feminists my foot.

sekxyqueen:
have not even started sef,still preparing...

thanks for your concern.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Proudly feminist.Thank God the OP said Nigerian men.

sekxyqueen:
wanna have a profound knowledge about this feminist of a thing..

as a feminist, what can you offer to the society..

?

MensCabal:
Actually feminist is a failed course not because it is wrong, but because women are looking at it wrongly. Men and Women can never be equal by doing exactly the same things like a Woman being a taxi driver just as a man can be the same or a woman being a construction engineer just as men can do same. Nope that is not how things work. In a Company, like a transportation service, women are meant to dish out the tickets while men carry the load and are the drivers of the buses, that is teamwork and division of labour...

Most women forget that feminism is all about killing the discrimination against women and not actually being equal to men in strength and power, but in their own unique ways

Wallade:
No body go tell you. Experience will teach you

donstan18:
Na so

Awon Nairaland strugglers funny set of people be forming feminist when they lack the idea of what the word "Feminism" is all about

Still laughing hard

You ladies will not kill me

Ladyhippolyta88:
To explain how low your understanding of feminism is you compare it to chores.Do not pretend like as if you don't know what it has achieved it has given women the right to make their own choices.Chauvinist misogynist my foot

Jman06:
Feminists are different from misandrists .

Ladyhippolyta88:
Seriously you annoy me at times but I would try to ignore you.

Alariiwo:
You don't need a tag on your gender to become whoever you want to be in life..

Emancipate yourself from such slavery and look at the brighter side of life?

#Feminism is a ploy to eradicate marriage between man and woman and promote LGBT stuffs which is wrong.
Nature will always take its course anywaiz.. you'll revert back to normal over time

Ladyhippolyta88:
See this otondo deceiving himself.If it was a joke we would not be where we are today.

MensCabal:
Actually feminist is a failed course not because it is wrong, but because women are looking at it wrongly. Men and Women can never be equal by doing exactly the same things like a Woman being a taxi driver just as a man can be the same or a woman being a construction engineer just as men can do same. Nope that is not how things work. In a Company, like a transportation service, women are meant to dish out the tickets while men carry the load and are the drivers of the buses, that is teamwork and division of labour...

Most women forget that feminism is all about killing the discrimination against women and not actually being equal to men in strength and power, but in their own unique ways

trustyshoess:
Proud feminist here. Don't be decieved by the percentage of men that seem to be against feminism on Nairaland. Most Nigerian men I have met, are either feminists themselves or support the idea. My boyfriend is a feminist and he's a Nigerian man. The ignorant ones can go ahead and date their likes
Life isn't all about who you date, it's who you are that counts

LordKO:
The meaning of feminism is as ambiguous as the meaning love. Therefore, personally, I don't see one who posses the qualities you listed as a true feminist - to me those are wannabe feminists, they're simply small-minded. This class of feminists usually posse sexist, arrogant, conceited and domineering attitudes. Also, they're hypocritically disingenuous - they're like their small-minded men counterparts.

Meanwhile, true feminist are proponents and practitioners of egalitarianism, conscientiousness and first between equals in romantic relationship/marriage (with the sane man as the first of the equals). They simply abhor subjugation in any form and guise. Believe you me, they're the best set of females to associate with. They're usually not just only smart and clever but equally insightful, outspoken, selfless and unassuming.

I love real feminists.

MensCabal:
Dating a feminist might sound like a good thing if you are looking for a financially dependent lady who is outspoken. Oprah Winfrey actually made feminism sound like something great and Chimamanda Adichie who also called herself "a happy feminist" changing the normal believe that we guys have that most feminists are pained ladies.

But that shouldn't fool you, what people say on TV and social media does not actually reflect the kind of lives they live. They might make feminism sounds like a woman rights movement for the greater good but the character of many wannabe feminists are just nothing to write home about.

Here is are 4 Reasons Why We At MensCabal Believe Nigerian Men Should Never Date Feminists

1. They See Men As Opponents

A feminist will always see men as her opponent and is more likely to challenge you in anything she thinks she doesn't want. Feminists believe that men are always trying to compete with her and trying to bring her down just to glorify themselves. So they are more likely to mistake your good intentions as an infringement on their rights.

Follow Men's Cabal - The Online Postal Just For Nigerian Real Men for more tips

2. Things Can Get Weird Socially And Culturally

Should you hold the door for her? who pays for the wedding? should you still pay bride price? should you pay for the date? These questions will keep coming up and your views will keep clashing. Face it, a feminist just wants to be equal to you which is not the normal norm and you might be wondering what you should do and not do.

According to African cultures a woman's place belongs in the kitchen (and other places), and it's completely okay for a woman to help out, but according to feminist it is also your job as the man to cook, clean, wash and do every other thing in the house while hustling because she is not a slave.

3.Feminists Are More Likely To Cheat

In the Western World, divorce is as normal as eating three times a day, you can get married today and divorce 2 hours later, it is normal and it has happened. A woman can get married up to four times in her life after dating more than 10 men, it is normal, it is accepted, they are feminists after all.

Follow Men's Cabal - The Online Postal Just For Nigerian Real Men for more tips

Back in the African society, it is outrageous, divorce is a really terrible thing and the stigma that follow female divorcees cannot be over-emphasized which is why Africa had one of the lowest divorce rates until feminists came alone.

A feminist believes that it is her right to be happy and she is would easily walk out of her marriage or cheat whenever she feels she is not getting what she dreamed of. According to them, if men are allowed to do it why not them?

4. She Will Always Challenge You

Yes, she will likely challenge everything you say. And if any of your decisions make her feel like you are trying to control her or even tell her what's right, she will likely walk out of the relationship.

Source: http://www.menscabal.com/2018/01/4-reasons-why-nigerian-men-should-never.html

cc: lalasticlala

iRepNaija1:
OP, your first and fourth point sound the same.

As to your second point, wouldn't each, different couple deal with those questions the best way they see fit and what works for them?

To your third point, the divorce rate is high in the west but that doesn't stem from the feminist movement. Each marriage is different and people choose to end them for different reasons. But to blame the divorce rate on a group of women is irresponsible. No one should be shamed if they choose to stay in a marriage or leave it. Moreover, we Nigerians tend to believe that as long as you're married, even if it's a bad marriage, that's somehow better.

OP, you have this sad, inaccurate caricature of what a feminist is. Feminists are women and men, young and old, and rich or poor. They come from all walks of life and experiences because feminism is about the social, political, and economic equality between both men and women. Not this imaginary woman you've conjured in your head who is angry and miserable and going to fight you tooth and nail about everything, who you so earnestly believe is taking power away from you. Feminism is about choice: a man should be able to enjoy and want to cook and clean, if that's what he desires, without his masculinity being questioned. He should be able to cry without being seen as weak. A woman should be able to be as independent and as successful as she wants without having to worry about threatening the man. A woman should have equal pay to men for equal work and not be punished with a lower salary because her employer thinks she may get pregnant and start a family.

MensCabal:
Love your points, but when you say we Nigerians I hope your have statistics and figures to prove that Nigerians believe that a bad marriage is better than divorce, because there is a high rate of divorce in Nigerian these recent times.

I think you are overthinking the article when you said I have a sad and inaccurate definition of feminism. I am not talking about feminists from America or the Western world, but those Nigeria. Men's Cabal is all about Nigerian men, so I am talking to men about how feminists see things.

Your last point bolded I b is what the American women believed in and why they started the revolution in the first place. Most Nigerian ladies don't know that and think feminism is all about getting back at those guys how treated them as shit. Now until a man meets the true feminists he would want to stay off the pained wannabes who don't know anything about feminism and this article is simply meant to educate them.

There was a woman who said women should not breastfeed their male babies, so that they wouldn't grow up strong, but should breastfeed their female babies so that they would be stronger than men. She is a feminist wannabe who doesn't understand and I'm warning all men against that.

If you were a guy wouldn't you want to know the signs and stay away from such women who come under the guise of feminism but all they have is hate for men. Men's Cabal helps you differentiate between those women and true feminists.

iRepNaija1:
First, you're asking me for statistics but don't provide any in your original post?

If what you say about your own experience is true, then those women do not fit into the definition of what feminist is. I don't know what they are but using the label of feminism in your post will only confuse and mislead people.

If I were to meet these women or men who are like what you described in your post, I would identify those traits with who they are as a person, keep it moving, and not blame an entire movement. Everyone's going to meet that person that doesn't respect them or treat them well. I've had my own fair share just like I'm sure you have. But I'll blame the person, not an entire group of people or feminism.

MensCabal:
Actually feminist is a failed course not because it is wrong, but because women are looking at it wrongly. Men and Women can never be equal by doing exactly the same things like a Woman being a taxi driver just as a man can be the same or a woman being a construction engineer just as men can do same. Nope that is not how things work. In a Company, like a transportation service, women are meant to dish out the tickets while men carry the load and are the drivers of the buses, that is teamwork and division of labour...

Most women forget that feminism is all about killing the discrimination against women and not actually being equal to men in strength and power, but in their own unique ways