₦airaland Forum

Don't be surprised that this very girl you've given your all and sacrificed everything for would one day look you straight in the eyes and ask 'what have you ever done for me?'

They can never love you the way you feel you deserve.
So never go that extra mile, it ain't worth it.

omo the topic is hot ,lem just follow up sharp sharp

You can't figure out ONE thing you have learnt from her for 3 solid years and all you have been doing is spending, coupled with the distant state of the relationship......Sorry, buh whatever depression you are getting from the impression you got is deserved,, out from that den and fashion for yourself a good woman that can only improve you in all ramifications,, time waits for no man....Goodluck.

graciousify:
please try talking to her about how you feel.

she found someone else, its a big trap if e don't getout now its suicide,
e is already suffering, if she can't c that she is not human.

ola9ja:
The story is voluminous and I can't share it here, I only picked a few paragraphs to express myself, but if you don't mind I can send it to you to read and advice. Although I have already made up my mind.

Pls kindly end the relationship. Don't kill yourself cuz of a girl. Walk out with your self respect in tact. Forget about your whole 3yrs investment in her and walk out with a lovely smile on your face.

Maket:
What if you died before the day. End any toxic relationship without procrastination.

OP, You're in a relationship for 5 years and have dated for 3 years. OK I HEAR TAKE 1 year to be lying.

It's a choice to see what you choose to see, go back and read it again, 3years + could even mean 7 years. If I lie for you, you wan dash me money. I can't lie because of cheap popularity. Be guided

Mcslize:
Pls kindly end the relationship. Don't kill yourself cuz of a girl. Walk out with your self respect in tact. Forget about your whole 3yrs investment in her and walk out with a lovely smile on your face.

Thanks bro. God bless you

ola9ja:
Most of these girls don't really love us, it's just a symbiotic relationship, I would be ending my present relationship on Monday, my birthday, I really thought I would get married to her but the relationship has become a toxic one so I had to move on with my life. I can not manage a toxic relationship, imagine sacrificing so much in a relationship that you have to go out of your own will to meet her needs , I have bought her phones twice, paid more than half of her house rent in school twice, it's a distant relationship and we have dated for 3years +, she hasn't even bought me an handkerchief before, I can't figure out one thing that I have learnt from her, I don't and won't regret what I have done for her but I am saddened that I have been in relationship with the wrong pers

I Knw A Guy Jst Like U.. Same Story, Ask The Holy Spirit E Will Lead You Becos U Ar Currently On A Trap, Pls Don't Blame Her Its Not Her Fault. don't leave till e ask u 2 so better ask now.

austyn0:
You can't figure out ONE thing you have learnt from her for 3 solid years and all you have been doing is spending, coupled with the distant state of the relationship......Sorry, buh whatever depression you are getting from the impression you got is deserved,, out from that den and fashion for yourself a good woman that can only improve you in all ramifications,, time waits for no man....Goodluck.

Baba na five years self, late 2012 till now, I just have to take my time, after ending the relationship, I will have to cross examine myself to be able to identify my own faults, I have always ask her to tell me what I am not doing right, her answer has always been nothing.

ola9ja:
Baba na five years self, late 2012 till now, I just have to take my time, after ending the relationship, I will have to cross examine myself to be able to identify my own faults, I have always ask her to tell me what I am not doing right, her answer has always been nothing.

There must be something you're not doing right

Happy birthday in advance OP. Regarding your relationship, do what will make you happy.

Shugarlord213:
If You like after this one, build house for he next girl mtcheeew

Nigeria has the highest weakest men

Bro..
The bolded is the bitter truth. I realise that not too long ago when I toured most african countries last year.

There is a reason other african women do not play with Nigerian men.

Nigerian men are the most valued in this african continent by women.
They are too generous and hopelessly in love in a stupid way.

Other African men no send you..if you want hit your head for wall.

What I am saying may sound unbelievable to most u grateful entitled Nigerian women.

It is only in Nigeria that you will see a stupid male student paying for school fees and accommodation for another fellow female student.

Na the same student the two of you be oo.

Nigerian men should get sense.

How can you be paying accommodation , school fees and salary to another woman that is not even your wife ( wife is even negotiatible).

And the funny part , they won't appreciate you or reciprocate and will leave you for the highest bidder in a flash.

ola9ja:
Most of these girls don't really love us, it's just a symbiotic relationship, I would be ending my present relationship on Monday, my birthday, I really thought I would get married to her but the relationship has become a toxic one so I had to move on with my life. I can not manage a toxic relationship, imagine sacrificing so much in a relationship that you have to go out of your own will to meet her needs , I have bought her phones twice, paid more than half of her house rent in school twice, it's a distant relationship and we have dated for 3years +, she hasn't even bought me an handkerchief before, I can't figure out one thing that I have learnt from her, I don't and won't regret what I have done for her but I am saddened that I have been in relationship with the wrong person for 5 fruitful years of my life. I will be 31 on Monday.

I don't regret spending on people but I usually get frustrated spending wrongly on people.

I like living people better than the way I met them.

I wouldn't really assume that I didn't learn anything from this relationship, I have learnt a lot and these are the things I have learnt...

1. Even the kindest person can turn into a cold-hearted person.

2. Even if you're madly in love, you should never think with your heart but with your brain.

3. You should never put your happiness in someone else’s hands because you never know when they will decide to leave you.

4. The more you show a person you love them, the less they will reciprocate or appreciate it.

5. It’s human nature to take things for granted, specially in long term relationships. They’ll always look for something better once the infatuation phase ends.

6. Relationships should not be governed solely by love, but also and most importantly by trust, understanding, maturity and SELF-RESPECT.

7. The moment you lose your self-respect you will see your partner as ‘too good to be true’. You will put them on a pedestal and be their slave. Never lose your self-respect and dignity.

8. Master the balance of power and you’ll master the whole relationship.

9. If you constantly show them you love them and care for them, they will start taking you for granted.

10. Distance yourself from your partner from time to time. It will help you see your relationship in a proper perspective.

11. Two main things should be present in a relationship: Trust and communication. If one of them is absent, your relationship is doomed to fail.

12. Being needy and clingy out of love is never a good idea because it will push your partner away and make them love you less.

13. The person that loves less in the relationship is the one in control of the relationship. It’s important to set a balance of power between you two or else one of you will definitely get hurt.

14. If your happiness is in someone else’s hands you’re rooting for conditional happiness. If they leave you, you will end up all alone, sad, depressed, hopeless and even suicidal. No one on this planet should control your happiness other than yourself.

15. The moment you hurt your partner, they will change forever even though you try your best to bring their good old self back.

16. Even if you give someone your heart, it’s not guaranteed that they will reciprocate.

17. The moment they start showing lack of interest, believe them instead of trying to convince yourself that they’re ‘mad’ or ‘going through a phase’ and that everything will be alright.

18. What’s meant for you will always be yours.

19. Sometimes God removes people from your life in an abrupt way because you were being led to danger.

20. If you walked away from a one-sided, toxic, negative, low-vibrational relationship, you won.
And the list goes on…

Most importantly, stay strong in any relationship you’re in. People come and go, the ones meant for you will stay. Stay strong when you're at your lowest and never let a heartbreak define you.

Just have faith and learn to always smile no matter what!

Happy Birthday in Advance Dear, you deserve better

ola9ja:
Most of these girls don't really love us, it's just a symbiotic relationship, I would be ending my present relationship on Monday, my birthday, I really thought I would get married to her but the relationship has become a toxic one so I had to move on with my life. I can not manage a toxic relationship, imagine sacrificing so much in a relationship that you have to go out of your own will to meet her needs , I have bought her phones twice, paid more than half of her house rent in school twice, it's a distant relationship and we have dated for 3years +, she hasn't even bought me an handkerchief before, I can't figure out one thing that I have learnt from her, I don't and won't regret what I have done for her but I am saddened that I have been in relationship with the wrong person for 5 fruitful years of my life. I will be 31 on Monday.

I don't regret spending on people but I usually get frustrated spending wrongly on people.

I like living people better than the way I met them.

I wouldn't really assume that I didn't learn anything from this relationship, I have learnt a lot and these are the things I have learnt...

1. Even the kindest person can turn into a cold-hearted person.

2. Even if you're madly in love, you should never think with your heart but with your brain.

3. You should never put your happiness in someone else’s hands because you never know when they will decide to leave you.

4. The more you show a person you love them, the less they will reciprocate or appreciate it.

5. It’s human nature to take things for granted, specially in long term relationships. They’ll always look for something better once the infatuation phase ends.

6. Relationships should not be governed solely by love, but also and most importantly by trust, understanding, maturity and SELF-RESPECT.

7. The moment you lose your self-respect you will see your partner as ‘too good to be true’. You will put them on a pedestal and be their slave. Never lose your self-respect and dignity.

8. Master the balance of power and you’ll master the whole relationship.

9. If you constantly show them you love them and care for them, they will start taking you for granted.

10. Distance yourself from your partner from time to time. It will help you see your relationship in a proper perspective.

11. Two main things should be present in a relationship: Trust and communication. If one of them is absent, your relationship is doomed to fail.

12. Being needy and clingy out of love is never a good idea because it will push your partner away and make them love you less.

13. The person that loves less in the relationship is the one in control of the relationship. It’s important to set a balance of power between you two or else one of you will definitely get hurt.

14. If your happiness is in someone else’s hands you’re rooting for conditional happiness. If they leave you, you will end up all alone, sad, depressed, hopeless and even suicidal. No one on this planet should control your happiness other than yourself.

15. The moment you hurt your partner, they will change forever even though you try your best to bring their good old self back.

16. Even if you give someone your heart, it’s not guaranteed that they will reciprocate.

17. The moment they start showing lack of interest, believe them instead of trying to convince yourself that they’re ‘mad’ or ‘going through a phase’ and that everything will be alright.

18. What’s meant for you will always be yours.

19. Sometimes God removes people from your life in an abrupt way because you were being led to danger.

20. If you walked away from a one-sided, toxic, negative, low-vibrational relationship, you won.
And the list goes on…

Most importantly, stay strong in any relationship you’re in. People come and go, the ones meant for you will stay. Stay strong when you're at your lowest and never let a heartbreak define you.

Just have faith and learn to always smile no matter what!

E be like say this girl really show you pepper

I've been in your situation before bro,the problem we guys make is looking out for physical attraction in a lady and not her character,I was dating a bombshell sexy model like chic back in the day but I never felt happy in the relationship,as soon as I broke up I realized that there are many women out there ready to invest as much time,affection and money in a relationship as you but they are never as pretty or beautiful but are wife materials in other ways that matters.

Long Distance relationships are naturally difficult.
My advise is TALK! TALK!
Visit her not with the purpose of ending the relationship but having a crashdown talk.
she's this and that bla bla... Have you spoken to her about it before? About your expectations.
Remember those times you just started and the love was sweet-ing you.
Recreate one of those moments and hold a crashdown talk, in person.
Then re evaluate your self and future after that.
No amount is too much on that trip bro. it's the best or last investment. All or nothing.

I am sure this guy must have discussed with the lady in questions. You ladies have funny way of behaving. It is only when the guy call it quit that you people get to realize that a bird is better than thousand in the bush. 3 years relationship and the lady has never bought anything to show that she love the guy in return, not even a singlet. My brother, 100% support you quit that toxic relationship.

biacan:
Instead of you to advise him on how to fix his relationship you want to ruin what he has worked hard to keep Listen well and listen carefully there is no relationship without challenges and if run away from your fears now you'll surely meet them in the future

duduade:
Happy Birthday in Advance Dear, you deserve better

Thanks so much, I really appreciate

seyezy:
I am sure this guy must have discussed with the lady in questions. You ladies have funny way of behaving. It is only when the guy call it quit that you people get to realize that a bird is better than thousand in the bush. 3 years relationship and the lady has never bought anything to show that she love the guy in return, not even a singlet. My brother, 100% support you quit that toxic relationship.

Didn't you hear him say it was a long distance relationship besides the said lady is a student the both of them lacks ways of communicating with each other he need to be the man and draw her closer to him to know what's the problem..... there are some ladies that lacks ways of expressing themselves until you pressure them to open up to you.......

ola9ja:
Most of these girls don't really love us, it's just a symbiotic relationship, I would be ending my present relationship on Monday, my birthday, I really thought I would get married to her but the relationship has become a toxic one so I had to move on with my life. I can not manage a toxic relationship, imagine sacrificing so much in a relationship that you have to go out of your own will to meet her needs , I have bought her phones twice, paid more than half of her house rent in school twice, it's a distant relationship and we have dated for 3years +, she hasn't even bought me an handkerchief before, I can't figure out one thing that I have learnt from her, I don't and won't regret what I have done for her but I am saddened that I have been in relationship with the wrong person for 5 fruitful years of my life. I will be 31 on Monday.

Just have faith and learn to always smile no matter what!

At thirty one I expect you to be more mature than this... end what you want to end and don't make noise over it. Don't try to it justify to anyone. You are here seeking validation for your actions, that will only serve to make you second guess yourself.

Don't worry, you will meet many people who are compatible with you if you are willing to look.

seyezy:
I am sure this guy must have discussed with the lady in questions. You ladies have funny way of behaving. It is only when the guy call it quit that you people get to realize that a bird is better than thousand in the bush. 3 years relationship and the lady has never bought anything to show that she love the guy in return, not even a singlet. My brother, 100% support you quit that toxic relationship.

I have talked to her more than you can ever think, I usually don't quit relationships, but. I'm quitting this one and I am cutting her off

biacan:
Didn't you hear him say it was a long distance relationship besides the said lady is a student the both of them lacks ways of communicating with each other he need to be the man and draw her closer to him to know what's the problem..... there are some ladies that lacks ways of expressing themselves until you pressure them to open up to you.......

Yeah, it's never her fault. It always boils down to he should be doing this, he should have done that, etc forgetting that he ain't in a relationship with himself.

I know sometimes you feel the need to stand up for your fellow girl, but sometimes please try, try to be a bit more rational. She "lacks ways of expressing herself," but suddenly finds her voice whenever she wants something from him.
Girl, that ain't love.

chicoMX:
Bro I don't understand o, she's still a student na. You want her to get you a new phone?



If you feel she's giving too little in the relationship, let her know your demands.

guy phone is too much, they are little things she cld get.for her man that he wld appreciate. Like someone like me, i so much appreciate.when a lady gets me singlets or boxers, it shows she appreciates you

ola9ja:
The story is voluminous and I can't share it here, I only picked a few paragraphs to express myself, but if you don't mind I can send it to you to read and advice. Although I have already made up my mind.

I don't mind, I love fairy-tales

ola9ja:
Baba na five years self, late 2012 till now, I just have to take my time, after ending the relationship, I will have to cross examine myself to be able to identify my own faults, I have always ask her to tell me what I am not doing right, her answer has always been nothing.

LOL...Coincidentally, the same girl I broke up with has the same "NOTHING" answer.... You see,, I have always wanted and will always want to be a real man to any girl I submit myself to,, I have only been into one relationship, its inception was 2014 and I ended it earlier this year after much make up and break up,, I was the only person trying to make it work,, I know I ain't perfect, as human I have faults, I will always tell her "Your love alone can't keep me, try to find my faults and tell me for me to work on correcting them,, I don't believe I am doing it right always." It's always "NOTHING",, nothing nd yet we keep breaking and making up...So annoying.

Dump the bitch

biacan:
Please try and consider talking to her you guys have come a long way together don't just throw it up

From observations, talk doesnt help from the op's position. The best is to withdraw gradually from her.....if things are going to turn around, she will notice and fight for the relationship

ola9ja:
Baba na five years self, late 2012 till now, I just have to take my time, after ending the relationship, I will have to cross examine myself to be able to identify my own faults, I have always ask her to tell me what I am not doing right, her answer has always been nothing.

There is nothing wrong with you bro. Needless to reevaluate yourself. They are the problem. Stay away from liabilities and leeches that won't help you grow. Trust me, there are loads of wonderful women out there who are not liabilities and ready to love/pamper their partners. I can't guarantee you won't be getting the usual women drama. Stay away from girls below they age of 25. A good number of them are hungry as$ leeches that can't afford to buy common biscuit for themselves and have never lifted a finger to work to know the true value of money. For a guy of your age, your focus should be finding a smart, educated, working class lady above 25 years. Be wise

.

360great:
Sincerely relationship drains alot of energy. I am happy to be single seriously.

Very true.....bt bros make sure u ve wells that u drill regularly ooo with no strings attached


Very Important!

CorGier:
Don't be surprised that this very girl you've given your all and sacrificed everything for would one day look you straight in the eyes and ask 'what have ever done for me?'

They can never love you the way you feel you deserve.
So never go that extra mile, it ain't worth it.

same word my EX used...I can't forget that statement in my life...I suffer for this girl wen I b student... she graduated , and asked me that question wen we had a little fight... fact is, the question made me better... now, I give without expecting anything back..I give and forget.. I don't go above what I can give and forget.

JERRY1925:
same word my EX used...I can't forget that statement in my life...I suffer for this girl wen I b student... she graduated , and asked me that question wen we had a little fight... fact is, the question made me better... now, I give without expecting anything back..I give and forget.. I don't go above what I can give and forget.

Same reason why you will never catch me saying "after all what I've done for you?' to some bítch after it all turns sour. Whatever I do for them, I can do for anybody.

Mehn it feels like I've been typing the same shít on the same topics on here lately. Ha.