Offpoint:
Nice story even though I didn't read it, but I know it's nice story cuz everyone says it's nice story.

I was not born to read

your name is truly offpoint...

FaithOba1:


Jeeeeeeesus is Lorrrrd...

putted it back...

RIP English....

someone should help me with meme please....
I aff faint.

stop being childish. its an error,so stop trying to make yourself look stupid.

seunakin43:

your name is truly offpoint...

Yeah, that's me... I'm me.

tega10:
Mine is that I was deceived to buy head set and phone charger that has not even a single wire in it. Mtchew pain me eh.
Came back after I realized, the table and the seller is no where to be found.
I just laugh my life

lwkm

[center]My Ikeja experience[/center]

I had just trekked from New Garage, Ikeja to the railway crossing where I mistakenly hit somebody. As courteous as I was I decided to look back and say sorry.

Unfortunately, the sorry was the beginning of story. The guy I hit was an "agbero", whom I could have avoided if I had taken another way (perhaps the meeting was fated).

As I turned and said my apology, I saw his face and something within me just nudged me that this guy is trouble.I neglected the prompting and continued my walk to where I would get a bus heading to Oshodi. Before I could get to the pedestrian bridge, the tables turned as my victim became my assailant and I became his victim.

He came by my said and started telling me that he's a good guy and that was the reason he left. Still following me I told him alright, thank you, but he continued the March with me until at the foot of the pedestrian bridge he came all out and grabbed me by my belt and in the twinkle of an eye took out my phone. Disappointingly for him, I felt it and hit his hand at that instant forcing him to drop my phone on the floor. I picked up the phone which was now scattered on the floor, and thanks to the robustness of the phone (Tecno Y3) it survived the onslaught.

After picking up the phone, I walked to the bridge with my assailant now accusing me of hitting his arm and his phone while onlookers did nothing. I briskly ascended the bridge and made my way to the bus stop. That day I almost lost my appetite.


Note: I was born and bred in Aj.
#ThisisLagos.

Poorboy:
I came back from togo with my girl, we arrived oshodi late at night and was heading to abuja that same night. As my phone take lost I no understand till today. Your own you even know say him lost from ur pocket, my own I no no

Your flight to Atlanta was by 5am or. what? What happened to breaking your trip and crashing in Lag......you had your girl with you man

SORRY, WHAT YOU WILL SEE IS, "THIS IS LAGOS, AND NOT LAGOS TO LAGOS AS YOU SAID". NO BODY HAVE THE TIME TO WELCOME YOU TO LAGOS. IF YOU LOOK ANY HOW, YOU SEE ANY HOW

SORRY, WHAT YOU WILL SEE IS, "THIS IS LAGOS, AND NOT WELCOME TO LAGOS AS YOU SAID". NO BODY HAVE THE TIME TO WELCOME YOU TO LAGOS. IF YOU LOOK ANY HOW, YOU SEE ANY HOW

I will never forget the day I bought packaged fufu inside an empty sony ericsson phone at computer village.It was like magic to me because I inspected the phone before paying the Crook. I crossed to the other side of the road to buy charge, that was when I sighted hot white fufu! Yes you heard right, hot white fufu inside the damn phone.The guy disappeared immediately.

FaithOba1:


Jeeeeeeesus is Lorrrrd...

putted it back...

RIP English....

someone should help me with meme please....
I aff faint.

I too sabi

SureBozz:


Hope you enjoyed yourself in Togo. I am currently in Togo. The land of Inkejor and yor.... Lol

I really enjoyed that place

happened to my brother at the same oshodi. i had warned him about hanging ear piece but he didnt listen. the guy didnt beleive it. phone was in his jeans pocket on minute gone the next.

those guys must have studied under Fagin

twentyk:
Omo the antidote is to became wahrah Like everybody..... Not only in Oshodi ooo, anywhere you enter if you do like bohloh dem Don observe you already.....

Everything depends in the way you carry yourself, wey you look, way you walk.... You have to look mean, angry and just fucking pissed with everybody....anybody match you or push you asap scream "alaye happen,... Believe me those Agbero no want fight,they just wanna sample you... EVERYTHING NA VOICE... anybody voice you voice Your Own back asap....

Eg... Conductor pls gimme my change.... (in conductors mind buttie leleyi)

Caption this.... Tap him from where you sitting(frown somehow and look irritated)oga changi dah...(conductor be like alaye I never get change cool down)see the difference homie...
On the street you have to be "unruly because they don't play by the rules.....

Gbayi!

You are the Real Lagosian!

[quote author=Capslock01 post=69786818]This happened in 2016 when I was still a student in Ibadan and I'm sharing this, in order to let people shine their eyes whenever they find themselves in Lagos. You'll find my experience below.
.
.

The slogan "welcome to lagos" seen at every border of lagos state does not literally mean you're welcome to lagos city.
.
If you've ever found yourself in Lagos. Then you're no stranger to the slogan "welcome to lagos", below is my welcoming experience.
.
I had to go through the torture of struggling out of bed as I had slept late because I arrived in Lagos around 11:30pm from school the other night. It was a beautiful morning of the day I was to pick Aluminium alloy up, at the Nigeria Aluminium extrusion company but it never dawned on me it was not going to be a beautiful day on my end.
Having lived in Lagos virtually all my life, I know the only way to beat the frequent chaotic traffic is by moving out very early. I observed a quick bath then reach for my bag to pick the clothes I had nicely folded in it from school, a white shirt with little touch of blue and a black trouser. The shirt was properly tucked in on the nearly faded black trouser with a bow tie to complement it, trying as much as I could to look official. With a sense of accomplishment, I quickly fell on my knees to commit my days unto God's hand before I set out. As I was reaching for the door I heard my mother's voice drifted pass me, "Emmanuel, come and drop anything expensive on you", she persuaded.
"I don't have anything expensive on me", I lied, but I had one of my most expensive stuffs on me at that time. I thought it was the usual protective advice, so I ignored and set out.
.
It was around 5am and the street was as busy as the strings of a guitar that are being struck constantly, I noticed they were more people on the street at that ungodly hour than they were in broad daylight where I came from. At the bus park, the blasting of hones, noise and the incessant chanting of people and bus conductor could send patient on life support to early grave. The park was filled with a hive of commuters that one had to be hyper active to get a bus, I stood for unknown minutes since I had no better choice than to wait and hope for a bus to
arrive soon. I was on all expenses paid trip, so I practically paid no attention to the price of bus. My prayer was fast answered as I heard the harsh voice of a typical
Lagos conductor screaming, "Oshod.! Oshod..! Oshod...!"
.
I zoomed off towards the direction of the bus and struggled to gain access as I had to contend with more
experienced commuters. I eventually succeeded, not without condoning the few violent
jabs from them. With the euphoria, I lowered my backside towards the seat to live the fruit of my recent struggle. However, the feeling was short-lived; as the seat that was designed for four people was used to commute five people, the discomfort could only be compared to the biblical hell. Every passenger was minding their business with the I don't care kind of look. The conductor's personality was not noticed by me but I guess it would be the usual harsh, non happy and loutish.
.
I was still enjoying the fruit of my struggle, when I heard "Bros, where is my money", the bus conductor pointed towards my direction. I reached for my pocket, gave him 500 Naira note and collected 300 Naira change. I made for my pocket the second time, returned the change and brought out my 'old but gold' earpiece, connected it to my phone and put my best song "Lord you're good by Don Meon" on replay in order to avoid the usual Lagos yellow bus mumbo-jumbo. I was still lost in the look of where I knew the young lady that sat on the seat behind me, when the bus halt. "everybody get down" the bus conductor shouted. At that point, some of the passengers were struggling it out with the driver and conductor for dropping them at 'Bolade' instead of 'Oshodi'. I alighted from the bus without saying a word and tucked in my phone with the earpiece still plugged-in. I stopped by a phone booth to buy recharge card, loaded it, returned my phone to the pocket and suspended my plugged-in earpiece with my ears without playing music, as I walked through the busy and crowded street of Oshodi. I was fascinated by how things had changed and cherished the serenity of the environment as I also never seized to marvel at how Lagos state government achieved such a feat in a short period of time. I was still engulfed by things around me when I noticed something had disappeared on me.
.
My inner man hoped it was my leg or Wallet! I couldn't touch my lower part for some minutes, because I could not foretold how I would react. I eventually took the step of faith, only for me to find out my phone had disappeared from my pocket with my earpiece left dangling. The feeling was too bad to be real, so much that I felt like my body was being used to pass electric current of high voltage, my phone gone? "a whole Samsung Galaxy S5...!", I muttered.
who stole my phone?
Who will I ask?
How will I ask? Were the questions that flowed through my mind. I tried to remain calm as much as I could but my heart pounded too fast like the sound of a thousand chariot going to the battle of Armageddon, one would not need stethoscope to hear the pounding. "How could I be so stupid to have lost a Samsung Galaxy S5 for crying out! The phone that holding it alone gave me some kind of feelings I could not explain.", I thought.
.
I have never envisaged myself being a victim to corporate pick pockets who flaunt themselves as responsible working-class individuals at major bus-stops or streets around the Lagos metropolis. Why did this happen to me? Rather than trying to embarrass myself, I pretended as if nothing happened and called home to tell them what had befallen me to avoid another story, because I've heard cases where parents were called and lied to after their child's phone got missing. After unknown minutes of deliberation, I headed towards NIGALEX for the sole reason I was in Lagos, but they added salt to the injury when they told me to come another day for the pick up.
.
As I embarked on my journey home after the unproductive pick up, I was weak and reminisced on the experience; it became obvious that life can sometimes be unpredictable and I learnt that obedience is the key in life. A beautiful morning turned out to be an horrible day for me with my Samsung Galaxy S5 missing and unproductive pick up of Aluminum alloy. When I got home and explained my experience to my mom, she nagged about it for umpteenth time even till date. Lol.
.
#NuelAdeyemi.







I can relate with this story..... The feelings that day can be compared to weightlessness

My second day in Lagos as a mobile individual, I enterd keke napep from yabatech and told the nuisance I was going to Onike (still in the same yaba o)... This guy went to drop me in Somolu... I had to walk a while to get a bus going back to yaba. The headbursting part of the adventure was that this particular bus passed the same place the napep guy passed but in opposite direction.
All I have to say is Thank you Lord!

Poorboy:
I really enjoyed that place

Nice one bro

Hmm

Aspireahead:
That's how i feared Lagos until i went for a training there in may. The place is worth the risk. Lagos is bae

It's not worth any risk. Overcrowded, den of thieves. What happened in front of me when I was in Lag made me wonder how you lot enjoy such a lawless state where petty thieves are bigger than the law. PH any day or time to Lag.

I was in Oshodi thrice with my phone in my pocket during my visit to Lagos and nothing happened. Maybe it was because of the trouser i was wearing..."Military Green Khaki Color"

yeyerolling:
Obalende once oshodi twice. I was listening to music as i dey go board lekki bus from obalende. Two guys hit me with shoulder. As i look back the music don stop the earpiece was dangling. Obalende became bigger as i froze for 4 mins . Oshodi own d thief follow me cross road for night o middle of road d guy snatch my phone bt na touch light he steal my samsung was in my bag

What the heck bruh? Finally e ti pa mi toooo . Like someone said, agidi + strong face. No one has ever did a number on me. Dem no born you well. Game recognizes game.

moscobabs:


What you saw in welcome address of Lagos is "This is lagos" not "welcome to Lagos"

I will never forget 2008 after 2 years of graduation without Job, I was shortlisted for an interview in a company via my friend in Ikeja (I have never been to the company before o) I put on my suit and a well polished black shoe to match my gorgeous dressing cos I applied as an Accountant.

When I step out of my house I discovered that everywhere is silent and no movement of yellow buses so I meet some stranded passengers in the bus stop and they told me Saka Saula(NURTW chairman) was assassinated this early morning ,so no commercial vehicle will work except I get private car.

5mins after a danfo arrived and pick us in the bus stop but the tfare is triple, that wasn't my problem anyways cos I have to be in my interview centre bfre 10am and it's 8:30am already in Agege. We already approached Otubu close to Guiness when these touts attack our Danfo they beat everybody esp the driver and conductor for refusing to give respect to the dead, I was using Nokia 23100 then before count of 2 the phone has been removed from my pocket and the only address to where I was going for interview is inside and I didn't have my friend phone number offhand.

The guy that remove it passed it to another guy and that one run away but I hold and drag the guy that remove it and I start crying the idiot still snatch the envelope that contain my credentials.... I really suffer.

I was dragging him till one guy call us and I explained everything to him, the guy is their boss. He pacified me and asked me to call my phone number by 7pm, I was like you dey craz? 10am is my interview and the address is in that phone, bro pls tiyin o ni baje!!! I have been searching for job since 2006 'esanu mi' The guy said he cannot get the guy that took the phone away now until evening.... I have no choice than to go back home with sorrow. I called at exactly 7pm and they asked me to come and collect my phone.

I got the phone back but I lost the job which cost me another 14months home before I finally got a job

lol this your own tprry no,be here o. i feel for u

tellwisdom:
Was just laffing myself out hearing most Mugus loosing their belongings

Street Oti, confidence and strength are all u need to live around Lagos.

Street Oti, I mean general orientation. If Oti no bail you, your confidence can scare them; and if that doesn't work- Omo, Na your strength go fight for you o!

Even as I look buttie reach, theres something that distinguishes me. I do everything to look like Mumu while on the road, but these people still have a way of separating the real men from Mugus.

Can't count how many miscreants I'd disfigured on an open road where they have thousands of their likes. Ni gboro aye?? - We die here

Ogbeni, u must be ready at all time whether Lagos or anywhere, if you no want make some stupid men use you clean their sweat

Omo your head is there. OT is the word . If you no get am, gbagbe. Men go reason your matter, anyday, anytime.

Alaye, I hail.

twentyk:
Omo the antidote is to became wahrah Like everybody..... Not only in Oshodi ooo, anywhere you enter if you do like bohloh dem Don observe you already.....

Everything depends in the way you carry yourself, wey you look, way you walk.... You have to look mean, angry and just fucking pissed with everybody....anybody match you or push you asap scream "alaye happen,... Believe me those Agbero no want fight,they just wanna sample you... EVERYTHING NA VOICE... anybody voice you voice Your Own back asap....

Eg... Conductor pls gimme my change.... (in conductors mind buttie leleyi)

Caption this.... Tap him from where you sitting(frown somehow and look irritated)oga changi dah...(conductor be like alaye I never get change cool down)see the difference homie...
On the street you have to be "unruly because they don't play by the rules.....

So onpoint hommie. In fact, at times, I intentionally barge into the so called rough boys and yell at them like they offended me especially those ones straying around in Computer Village, ikeja. Plus, I don’t dress posh - always rugged!

moscobabs:


What you saw in welcome address of Lagos is "This is lagos" not "welcome to Lagos"

I will never forget 2008 after 2 years of graduation without Job, I was shortlisted for an interview in a company via my friend in Ikeja (I have never been to the company before o) I put on my suit and a well polished black shoe to match my gorgeous dressing cos I applied as an Accountant.

When I step out of my house I discovered that everywhere is silent and no movement of yellow buses so I meet some stranded passengers in the bus stop and they told me Saka Saula(NURTW chairman) was assassinated this early morning ,so no commercial vehicle will work except I get private car.

5mins after a danfo arrived and pick us in the bus stop but the tfare is triple, that wasn't my problem anyways cos I have to be in my interview centre bfre 10am and it's 8:30am already in Agege. We already approached Otubu close to Guiness when these touts attack our Danfo they beat everybody esp the driver and conductor for refusing to give respect to the dead, I was using Nokia 23100 then before count of 2 the phone has been removed from my pocket and the only address to where I was going for interview is inside and I didn't have my friend phone number offhand.

The guy that remove it passed it to another guy and that one run away but I hold and drag the guy that remove it and I start crying the idiot still snatch the envelope that contain my credentials.... I really suffer.

I was dragging him till one guy call us and I explained everything to him, the guy is their boss. He pacified me and asked me to call my phone number by 7pm, I was like you dey craz? 10am is my interview and the address is in that phone, bro pls tiyin o ni baje!!! I have been searching for job since 2006 'esanu mi' The guy said he cannot get the guy that took the phone away now until evening.... I have no choice than to go back home with sorrow. I called at exactly 7pm and they asked me to come and collect my phone.

I got the phone back but I lost the job which cost me another 14months home before I finally got a job

Wtffffffff. Woooow

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBIinx43laE

This happened at iyana ipaja during my Nysc days in 2007. I was serving in a law firm. It was my cd day. After cds, i usually changed to corporate wear and kept my nysc uniform, boot, vest and cap in a leather bag.

I was walking to the bus station with the bag on the right. From nowhere, two guys on a bike came close. Before I could figure out what was happening, they had snatched my bag and sped off. I was devastated. Passing out was just a few weeks away.

I ended up wearing my fiance's old nysc uniform.

okomile:
My mother's earring was removed from her ear. She said she quickly removed the second one and put it in her mouth. She was pushed inside vegetable basket. The seller simply told her, mama e dide-stand up. When the rail line was a market. She lives in shogunle. Eko ilu ogbon

, eko wengele

ajast:
Mine happened in the mid 90s, I was born and grow up in Lagos and equally very street wise, I went out of Lagos for the first time to school in Ilorin. During the holidays I was back in lagos and passing through oshodi, I sat at the window side of a danfo bus heading to Mushin Oloosa with my wrist hanging on the window , swiftly I felt a shock and I started asking the person beside me what happened? He said my wrist wash has been snatched, yeee! My Ramondwell gone ? I rushed down and shouted ole ole following the guy who ran across the railway line and was showing me the wrist watch and making a sign to me to come and collect it if I can and at the same time abusing me as oloshi! But some women selling pepper by the railway line were begging me with my mother and Father not to ever go beyond where I was , mtchew, that was how my Raymondwell wristwatch of 7k then went away.

i smell lies

DonPikko:
, eko wengele

Beeni oooooo

What of the people who return missing stuff back to owners in Lagos? they are some like that in Lagos