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Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor - Romance - Nairaland

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Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Viserion: 3:07pm On Jul 21, 2018
it's wrong to ‘reward’ ladies who dated them when they were not rich? I don’t get it, was she doing you a favour by being in a relationship with you?
It has become common place to read about rewards, car gifts especially, purchased by guys as rewards for ladies who they were in a relationship with when they were poor. I think in constantly doing that, guys are making it look abnormal, the idea, that a lady is supposed to stick with her man, come rain or shine.
She wasn’t doing you a favour by being in a relationship with you. No one is doing you a favour by being in one with you now. Whether it ended or not, you owe her nothing for that period the both of you were dating.
Guys should stop making it seem like dating a particular lady is a privilege they don’t deserve.
just my opinion tho.

5 Likes

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by uwa1(m): 3:12pm On Jul 21, 2018
You have a point.... But being in a relationship might not be what the guys are appreciating the ladies for rather the sacrifice and support the ladies render while in d said relationship... No matter what, a hand that watereth shall be watered...

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Slayar: 3:17pm On Jul 21, 2018
If we apply that logic then you shouldn't reward your teachers and lecturers when you become successful.

2 Likes

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by iamJ(m): 3:51pm On Jul 21, 2018
well to me i owe her the world but if she walks away before i can give her the world, thats her fault not mine, you have to stand by your man always

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 4:56pm On Jul 21, 2018
How about looking at it this way? The guy is just showing his appreciation to someone who sacrificed a lot to get him where he is now. I admit “big gestures” are a quint Nigerian trait but not everyone plasters it on social media . That said a guy will have his own reasons. I believe it’s directed to the many people who probably told the girl to leave his “broke arse” and move on!
For there would have been many!!

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by CAPSLOCKED: 5:03pm On Jul 21, 2018
SAME TOPIC.. JUST A DIFFERENT THREAD.
FELLAS, REWARD ANYONE YOU WANT TO BECAUSE YOU FEEL LIKE. YOU DON'T OWE NO ONE NOTHING.
THANKS.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 5:57pm On Jul 21, 2018
If it's someone you want to marry, no need. But if na just dating, it's not bad
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by pansophist(m): 6:10pm On Jul 21, 2018
Yes, it wrong.

Will you also reward her for being poor while dating you?

And if she is expecting a reward, she is materialistic and does not love you.

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Slayar: 8:56pm On Dec 13, 2018
It's something I can do
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Eberechi24(f): 9:07pm On Dec 13, 2018
they leave you when you are broke, Nairaland won't have peace. they stay with you when you are broke Nairaland will break.

can't we have peace on this forum?

When you are not comfortable doingsomething don't make those that do it look stupid or abnormal. Stop planting seed of discord in relationship. Stop looking for trouble where its not.

Let people live their lives in peace, keep your smartness to yourself!

2 Likes

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by HappyNigerian: 9:14pm On Dec 13, 2018
Only my parents and siblings deserve eternal "reward" from me when I make it big. No GF is deserving of such... #Never
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Nobody: 9:21pm On Dec 13, 2018
Op that's more like pension or gratuity! U be ode!
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by prettyesther20: 9:24pm On Dec 13, 2018
It's just like saying its not necessary to reward your parents for making you who u are today because it's their "job"

You appreciate people because of the sacrifices they made for you which appears to be rare in this present society and not because of "why" they did it

Op, it's not everything in life u apply logic to. It is what it is.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Raydans: 2:38am On Dec 14, 2018
prettyesther20:
It's just like saying its not necessary to reward your parents for making you who u are today because it's their "job"

You appreciate people because of the sacrifices they made for you which appears to be rare in this present society and not because of "why" they did it

Op, it's not everything in life u apply logic to. It is what it is.
Your comparison does not logically follow. Your parents brought you to life, raised you up, cared for you, gave you education, taught you morals, feed you and guided you to the right direction etc. It is only normal to be appreciative when you make it out of life. How then do you compare it to an ordinary girl that both of you are dating yourselves. Nobody is doing anyone a favour, you are broke and so she is. Why then must you reward her on a mutual level of dating eachother. It only logically follows if she rewards you when she makes it because you dated her while she was broke

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Randy100: 5:50am On Dec 14, 2018
The only reward you owe her is marriage especially if she stood by you during your trying times.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by kense88: 6:36am On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:
How about looking at it this way? The guy is just showing his appreciation to someone who sacrificed a lot to get him where he is now. I admit “big gestures” are a quint Nigerian trait but not everyone plasters it on social media . That said a guy will have his own reasons. I believe it’s directed to the many people who probably told the girl to leave his “broke arse” and move on!
For there would have been many!!
Hmmm. Have i been dating aliens ? what kind of sacrifices biko ?
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by eezeribe(m): 7:28am On Dec 14, 2018
Slayar:
If we apply that logic then you shouldn't reward your teachers and lecturers when you become successful.
Teachers and lecturers were doing their jobs...
They were paid salaries, some would be paid pensions and gratuities...
I don't owe them anything...
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Rawmalik: 7:55am On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:
How about looking at it this way? The guy is just showing his appreciation to someone who sacrificed a lot to get him where he is now. I admit “big gestures” are a quint Nigerian trait but not everyone plasters it on social media . That said a guy will have his own reasons. I believe it’s directed to the many people who probably told the girl to leave his “broke arse” and move on!
For there would have been many!!
you this missraine. Your sentences are never constructive.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 1:23pm On Dec 14, 2018
kense88:
Hmmm. Have i been dating aliens ? what kind of sacrifices biko ?

The sacrifice of being suppotive even when he had no money for a packet of noodles. The sacrifice that despite not having an money or assets his dream was worth supporting. The sacrifice of not giving up on him. The aliens you date want you to sponsor their lifestyle with no sacrifice.

1 Like

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 1:26pm On Dec 14, 2018
Rawmalik:
you this missraine. Your sentences are never constructive.
Just say you did not understand what I wrote. It’s perfectly understandable
How was my post not constructive?

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by TonyeBarcanista(m): 1:40pm On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:


The sacrifice of being suppotive even when he had no money for a packet of noodles. The sacrifice that despite not having an money or assets his dream was worth supporting. The sacrifice of not giving up on him. The aliens you date want you to sponsor their lifestyle with no sacrifice.
I'm still trying to figure out the sacrifice in your post though...

Did she give him money when he had no money for noodles? Did she buy him a phone when his phone crashed and had nothing on him? Did she pay his rent when his rent expired and landlord came chasing him? Did she teach him a skill that helped him?

What sacrifice exactly because "staying" with someone in poverty or giving advice is not sacrifice. In fact, why do you girls think you do guys favor by staying with them when they had nothing?

Only parents and siblings deserve reward! No other person is entitled to except the few that really sacrificed (if any)

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Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 2:10pm On Dec 14, 2018
TonyeBarcanista:

I'm still trying to figure out the sacrifice in your post though...

Did she give him money when he had no money for noodles? Did she buy him a phone when his phone crashed and had nothing on him? Did she pay his rent when his rent expired and landlord came chasing him? Did she teach him a skill that helped him?

What sacrifice exactly because "staying" with someone in poverty or giving advice is not sacrifice. In fact, why do you girls think you do guys favor by staying with them when they had nothing?

Only parents and siblings deserve reward! No other person is entitled to except the few that really sacrificed (if any)

Ffs ...
Whatever little she had she shared that covers everything. And he thanked her. If you want specifics you can ask her. Sacrifice is symbolic to her actions and attitude as whole you are the one being pedantic and way too literal regarding this.
And don’t say “you girls”
Say some as not everyone has the mindset you are trying to convey.
Besides he is free to reward whomever he sees fit. You are free to disagree that is your right.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Brugo(m): 2:31pm On Dec 14, 2018
She was probably the reason you were poor in the first place. angry

You owe your ex girlfriend nothing
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by TonyeBarcanista(m): 2:31pm On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:

Ffs ...
Whatever little she had she shared that covers everything. And he thanked her. If you want specifics you can ask her. Sacrifice is symbolic to her actions and attitude as whole you are the one being pedantic and way too literal regarding this.
And don’t say “you girls”
Say some as not everyone has the mindset you are trying to convey.
Besides he is free to reward whomever he sees fit. You are free to disagree that is your right.

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by TonyeBarcanista(m): 2:33pm On Dec 14, 2018
Brugo:
She was probably the reason you were poor in the first place.

You owe your ex girlfriend nothing
Exactly! Most guys don't know that

1 Like

Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by kense88: 9:56pm On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:


The sacrifice of being suppotive even when he had no money for a packet of noodles. The sacrifice that despite not having an money or assets his dream was worth supporting. The sacrifice of not giving up on him. The aliens you date want you to sponsor their lifestyle with no sacrifice.
You ladies are so funny. In what way are you supporting the young man, if i may ask ? By hanging around him and waiting for a richer guy to show up, so you can dump the poor guy. How has the idea of you not giving up on him, assisted in achieving his goal ? Please, why can't you emulate successful women like Lynda ikeji and stop living your life supporting men? You are not different from those aliens i was talking about.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 10:08pm On Dec 14, 2018
kense88:
You ladies are so funny. In what way are you supporting the young man, if i may ask ? By hanging around him and waiting for a richer guy to show up, so you can dump the poor guy. How has the idea of you not giving up on him, assisted in achieving his goal ? Please, why can't you emulate successful women like Lynda ikeji and stop living your life supporting men? You are not different from those aliens i was talking about.
And since you know Jack about me
Know this I am way past that stage
I have a career a very good job and I pay for my own shyte. He is on a level.
So no dramas there but you still assume all the women here are hungry, far from it there are women who carry their own weight maybe you have never met any? I cannot fix that unfortunately.
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by Kidaholic(m): 10:22pm On Dec 14, 2018
Fact : *Men who do this shit are the reason why most girls are materialistic today*

How can you be building house for your ex simply because she dated when you were poor? Arrant nonsense!
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by kense88: 11:34pm On Dec 14, 2018
MissRaine69:

And since you know Jack about me
Know this I am way past that stage
I have a career a very good job and I pay for my own shyte. He is on a level.
So no dramas there but you still assume all the women here are hungry, far from it there are women who carry their own weight maybe you have never met any? I cannot fix that unfortunately.

But you sounded very entitled. Well, that's how we identify those aliens i was talking about. Happy to know you have a job, but you still haven't answered my questions
Re: Opinion: It Is Wrong To Reward A Lady Who Dated You When You Were Poor by MissRaine69(f): 12:41am On Dec 15, 2018
kense88:
But you sounded very entitled. Well, that's how we identify those aliens i was talking about. Happy to know you have a job, but you still haven't answered my questions
You interpreted what I wrote the way you wanted to interpreted not sure how you even reached that conclusion.
Like I said ( something you repeatedly keep doing) your view of support is literal. I cannot fix a concrete belief system. I don’t need to be like Linda I am quite happy with who I am.

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