Without wasting much of the time, let me just go straight to my point.
Ve been dating this girl for 2yrs now. & honestly speaking, she's just the best among all the girls i ve dated. She's hardworking, she cooks well. Good @ house chores. Before I got my washing machine late last year. Each time she comes around from Portharcourt, she washes all my cloths and do every needful things. Was with her in Portharcourt, but left there 2017 cos I got a better job in Lagos. She still comes to visit me each time she gets little opportunity from where she's managing. Her work.
When I was in Portharcourt with her 2017. She took In twice same year 2017, we got rid of the pregnancy. Last month been December she came around in Lagos to visit me, & it happened that we did it, & now she's pregnant. Even her elder sister called me this evening. We were discussing. They are insisting I should come see there parents be4 the pregnancy becomes obvious.
Frankly speaking, my problem is am not ready to settle down now. I feel am been forced to go do knocking of door and introduction. I told her she can give bath, I will support her financially. Till when am ready, I will come do the necessary things. Buh she & her sister are refusing. My job isn't even secure, it's contract. The little money I ve saved, 2million plus, planning on using that money to relocate to Abuja & start up something there. I can even move her with me. once am done with this job late this year. I ve not even build a house. Not even in the village nor town here. The house we live in, in the village is my uncle's own. I can't marry a wife & still live there.

Plsss fellow Nairalanders, am so so confused & depressed same time. That i ve been battling with for a long time. Depression. She's also aware.
And this, I want to keep away from my family. Don't want them to know that a girl is pregnant for me.
Please help me out, what do I really do now. I no longer concentrate at work. Am lost.

You don't have problem you only need advise.
Bro, go and see her family and do the needful. Chikena

take ur time to think well enough, stop assuming how things will turn out,let it play out itself.

Hello
I feel if u re not ready to start a family, u shud simply use protection but as she had aborted 2 pregnancies before, just keep this one ND do the needful. If u truly love and u think she is d right one for u, just engage her ..I advise u two shud discuss if u feel u re not still ready to marry her ND explain issues to her. Let her see reasons with u. And u shud also consider her too. Visit her parents ND talk with them.

Bro, my kind of work, I work Saturdays. Don't ve time traveling down to Portharcourt to see her parents. I had 3weeks leave last month. I resumed Jan 14. My boss wouldn't even comply with me if I try taking excuses. & the longer I stay too, the pregnancy becomes obvious. Then, her parents might ve find out.

Constance20:
Hello
I feel if u re not ready to start a family, u shud simply use protection but as she had aborted 2 pregnancies before, just keep this one ND do the needful. If u truly love and u think she is d right one for u, just engage her ..I advise u two shud discuss if u feel u re not still ready to marry her ND explain issues to her. Let her see reasons with u. And u shud also consider her too. Visit her parents ND talk with them.

Not that easy for me bro.

madridguy:
You don't have problem you only need advise.
Bro, go and see her family and do the needful. Chikena

Visiting her parents requires me going with my people, & that's what am avoiding. If it were to visit them alone or with a frnd, I can do that. Buh ofcos, her parents would demand I come with my people.

Constance20:
Hello
I feel if u re not ready to start a family, u shud simply use protection but as she had aborted 2 pregnancies before, just keep this one ND do the needful. If u truly love and u think she is d right one for u, just engage her ..I advise u two shud discuss if u feel u re not still ready to marry her ND explain issues to her. Let her see reasons with u. And u shud also consider her too. Visit her parents ND talk with them.

You are not ready for marriage now. You have not built your house yet. Your job is not even secure yet.

Just take a min and hear yourself ponder over those questions....

DID U SIT DOWN AND ASK YOURSELF THOSE SET OF QUEST B4 YOU HAD SEX WITH HER?

Bro, you have terminated the pregnancy TWICE oo. So u want this one terminated too? KARMA IS A BITCH OOO.

TOMORRO, YOU WILL BE THE ONE SAYING THIS GIRL CAME TO STAB ME BECAUSE I MARRIED ANOTHER GIRL THAT COULD GIVE BIRTH.

Must u build house before u go and see her parents? Nonsense....

Easy bro, no harm.

SilentVboy:
You are not ready for marriage now. You have not built your house yet. Your job is not even secure yet.

Just take a min and hear yourself ponder over those questions....

DID U SIT DOWN AND ASK YOURSELF THOSE SET OF QUEST B4 YOU HAD SEX WITH HER?

Bro, you have terminated the pregnancy TWICE oo. So u want this one terminated too? KARMA IS A BITCH OOO.

TOMORRO, YOU WILL BE THE ONE SAYING THIS GIRL CAME TO STAB ME BECAUSE I MARRIED ANOTHER GIRL THAT COULD GIVE BIRTH.

Must u build house before u go and see her parents? Nonsense....

Emmy417:
Bro, my kind of work, I work Saturdays. Don't ve time traveling down to Portharcourt to see her parents. I had 3weeks leave last month. I resumed Jan 14. My boss wouldn't even comply with me if I try taking excuses. & the longer I stay too, the pregnancy becomes obvious. Then, her parents might ve find out.

Hmmm...
Switch off your phone, remove the sim card, throw it away, buy another sim card and continue your life.



3 weeks later, welcome back your sim card. call her and her sister and apologize for inconveniences due to circumstances beyond your control.

By then, half of the problem will solve itself out. Then solve the rest of the problem.

This is the only realistic way to tackle the problem in your situation.
Sorry if I appear heartless.

Dude, don't marry anyone because of pregnancy.
Don't let any stupid person on Nairaland blackmail you. Marriage is not for pregnancy protection

Emmy417:
Without wasting much of the time, let me just go straight to my point.
Ve been dating this girl for 2yrs now. & honestly speaking, she's just the best among all the girls i ve dated. She's hardworking, she cooks well. Good @ house chores. Before I got my washing machine late last year. Each time she comes around from Portharcourt, she washes all my cloths and do every needful things. Was with her in Portharcourt, but left there 2017 cos I got a better job in Lagos. She still comes to visit me each time she gets little opportunity from where she's managing. Her work.
When I was in Portharcourt with her 2017. She took In twice same year 2017, we got rid of the pregnancy. Last month been December she came around in Lagos to visit me, & it happened that we did it, & now she's pregnant. Even her elder sister called me this evening. We were discussing. They are insisting I should come see there parents be4 the pregnancy becomes obvious.
Frankly speaking, my problem is am not ready to settle down now. I feel am been forced to go do knocking of door and introduction. I told her she can give bath, I will support her financially. Till when am ready, I will come do the necessary things. Buh she & her sister are refusing. My job isn't even secure, it's contract. The little money I ve saved, 2million plus, planning on using that money to relocate to Abuja & start up something there. I can even move her with me. once am done with this job late this year. I ve not even build a house. Not even in the village nor town here. The house we live in, in the village is my uncle's own. I can't marry a wife & still live there.

Plsss fellow Nairalanders, am so so confused & depressed same time. That i ve been battling with for a long time. Depression. She's also aware.
And this, I want to keep away from my family. Don't want them to know that a girl is pregnant for me.
Please help me out, what do I really do now. I no longer concentrate at work. Am lost.

Pull your self together bro.The deed Is already done..
First: Tell your family, they will feel disappointed but they will surely come around.

Secondly: Go and see her parent, since she has all the qualities you need in a wife.

Thirdly: what you have with you can startup and run a family well..Do not kill yourself,things will sort itself out.

Newboss:
Dude, don't marry anyone because of pregnancy.
Don't let any stupid person on Nairaland blackmail you. Marriage is not for pregnancy protection

Proffer a solution instead of criticizing other's opinions

Bro. U Mess up Shah! For Me Just Explain All this to her. let her try understand and keep Assuring her she's the One U wanna settle down with.

She knows where I work, she knows where I live in Lagos. Doing that it's not an option. Thanks tho.

Bluezy13:


Hmmm...
Switch off your phone, remove the sim card, throw it away, buy another sim card and continue your life.



3 weeks later, welcome back your sim card. call her and her sister and apologize for inconveniences due to circumstances beyond your control.

By then, half of the problem will solve itself out. Then solve the rest of the problem.

This is the only realistic way to tackle the problem in your situation.
Sorry if I appear heartless.

Cee9:


Pull your self together bro.The deed Is already done..
First: Tell your family, they will feel disappointed but they will surely come around.

Secondly: Go and see her parent, since she has all the qualities you need in a wife.

Thirdly: what you have with you can startup and run a family well..Do not kill yourself,things will sort itself out.

Go...Go...Go...go where
Dude said he can't afford to be absent from duty at the moment.

Bluezy13:


Proffer a solution instead of criticizing other's opinions

Read it again. You should see the solution

you are not ready to settle down but you're ready to support her financially

guy, it's not that you're not ready, but the truth is you don't see a FUTURE with her

your eye don open, love don clear

you made a mistake, I say man up and own your responsibilities

you can still marry her and keep working at the same time

money is not your problem, but commitment is

Just scared, I know how many years it took me to save such amount of money, now seeing myself raising a family with it. Frankly speaking, quite difficult for me. Ve already planned on relocating & starting up something with that money. This whole issues now. Am so freaking confused.

Cee9:


Pull your self together bro.The deed Is already done..
First: Tell your family, they will feel disappointed but they will surely come around.

Secondly: Go and see her parent, since she has all the qualities you need in a wife.

Thirdly: what you have with you can startup and run a family well..Do not kill yourself,things will sort itself out.

Emmy417:
She knows where I work, she knows where I live in Lagos. Doing that it's not an option. Thanks tho.

Hmmm...


Tell them to keep the pregnancy, that you'll attend to visiting of parents part when you are chanced provided you still see each other as you used to.
Relax and concentrate on your work after which you go...you have to...see her people when your chanced. Every other thing will take care of itself

Newboss:

Read it again. You should see the solution

Money is also a problem here. My contract ends ending of this year. Will I start up family with roughly 2 to 3million naira? Money that I ve planned in using to build myself.

lilmax:
you are not ready to settle down but you're ready to support her financially

guy, it's not that you're not ready, but the truth is you don't see a FUTURE with her

your eye don open, love don clear

you made a mistake, I say man up and own your responsibilities

you can still marry her and keep working at the same time

money is not your problem, but commitment is

Seeing of each other has to stop for now. Cos she can't come this far journey in her condition of pregnancy. I wouldn't even let her come. It's not safe for her. Except I do the going to see her. Don't know when that would be even. Could take 5 or 6months time. & they saying is far. That i need to come this month, which I can't. Honestly

Bluezy13:


Hmmm...


Tell them to keep the pregnancy, that you'll attend to visiting of parents part when you are chanced provided you still see each other as you used to.
Relax and concentrate on your work after which you go...you have to...see her people when your chanced. Every other thing will take care of itself

Emmy417:
Just scared, I know how many years it took me to save such amount of money, now seeing myself raising a family with it. Frankly speaking, quite difficult for me. Ve already planned on relocating & starting up something with that money. This whole issues now. Am so freaking confused.

while you consider your interest, aconsider that of the lady and her family also

Just do the needful bro, in few years you will look back and be glad you did.

See her parents and own up to the pregnancy.
Save the lady's face, she has sacrificed much for you
Money will always come bro.

Emmy417:
Seeing of each other has to stop for now. Cos she can't come this far journey in her condition of pregnancy. I wouldn't even let her come. It's not safe for her. Except I do the going to see her. Don't know when that would be even. Could take 5 or 6months time. & they saying is far. That i need to come this month, which I can't. Honestly

Tell your family, any member of your family can go on your behalf especially (Man).
Is she Igbo?

She's not Igbo. She's River's. Am Igbo. I gave them that option as well. I told them I will send representatives. & to be quite honest, don't ve the plans of sending any member of my family, I planned on sending 2 or 3 mature men I can get to go stand for me. Buh she & her sister said no, that there dad won't accept a third party. That the man would like to see me in person. & according to them before now,there dad is a strict man. Retired force man.

Cee9:

Tell your family, any member of your family can go on your behalf especially (Man).
Is she Igbo?

dude you sure you're alright..
your not ready for a family yet your screwing her without a condom..
either you sit her down and tell her your plans or do the needful and see her parents..
Don't ruin that girls life with abortion

...SMH... some people will never learn... sorry sir but you are one of them, your girlfriend too.


Damn 2 good times, two abortions and she still allowed you to touch her without protection... You went swimming without protection!. damn... some people will never learn...


You aren't ready for marriage, you can't even get your people to go see her family. smh... All I will say is, own your responsibilities and stop making excuses...... and don't even think of aborting that child, don't go there......

Emmy417:
Without wasting much of the time, let me just go straight to my point.
Ve been dating this girl for 2yrs now. & honestly speaking, she's just the best among all the girls i ve dated. She's hardworking, she cooks well. Good @ house chores. Before I got my washing machine late last year. Each time she comes around from Portharcourt, she washes all my cloths and do every needful things. Was with her in Portharcourt, but left there 2017 cos I got a better job in Lagos. She still comes to visit me each time she gets little opportunity from where she's managing. Her work.
When I was in Portharcourt with her 2017. She took In twice same year 2017, we got rid of the pregnancy. Last month been December she came around in Lagos to visit me, & it happened that we did it, & now she's pregnant. Even her elder sister called me this evening. We were discussing. They are insisting I should come see there parents be4 the pregnancy becomes obvious.
Frankly speaking, my problem is am not ready to settle down now. I feel am been forced to go do knocking of door and introduction. I told her she can give bath, I will support her financially. Till when am ready, I will come do the necessary things. Buh she & her sister are refusing. My job isn't even secure, it's contract. The little money I ve saved, 2million plus, planning on using that money to relocate to Abuja & start up something there. I can even move her with me. once am done with this job late this year. I ve not even build a house. Not even in the village nor town here. The house we live in, in the village is my uncle's own. I can't marry a wife & still live there.

Plsss fellow Nairalanders, am so so confused & depressed same time. That i ve been battling with for a long time. Depression. She's also aware.
And this, I want to keep away from my family. Don't want them to know that a girl is pregnant for me.
Please help me out, what do I really do now. I no longer concentrate at work. Am lost.

When you were on top of her did you forget you were not ready. You men should just stop having sex if you are not ready for the consequences. Each action has a consequence. You made the bed, please go lie in it. When you are dating someone and sleeping with them make sure you see a future with them. If you truly loved the girl abortion would not even be an option for you

Emmy417:
Money is also a problem here. My contract ends ending of this year. Will I start up family with roughly 2 to 3million naira? Money that I ve planned in using to build myself.

Is it not possible for the contract to be renewed? You can at least engage her and pay some part of the bride price. Let her know your plans for the future. Discuss with her. Forget your fears. There is no knowing the future.

Your posts are full of excuses. The excuses you're making + the trauma you've been putting her through shows you don't love her.

Ladies, do better: don't waste your body on men like these who don't love nor deserve you.

Emmy417:

When I was in Portharcourt with her 2017. She took In twice same year 2017, we got rid of the pregnancy. Last month been December she came around in Lagos to visit me, & it happened that we did it, & now she's pregnant. Frankly speaking, my problem is am not ready to settle down now.

She has aborted not once but twice for you. You got her pregnant yet again and you're still not ready to settle down. The hell? Evil.

Ladies, do better: for the sake of your health and self-esteem, run from evil and time-wasting men like these.

Bring that money let me give you a pos so you use to set up a big mobile banking shop, and then you get married to her. Next time try and be responsible by having sex with a condom or better still keep your Dingdong in your trousers like me and avoid sex till your dreams come true.