Long post but please i really need the advice. Please.

Background.
I started dating my now ex-boyfriend when i was 17. We met when i was in 100lvl but started dating in 200lvl.
He's 6years older than me.
It has always been long distance. 9-10hours apart but that wasn't a problem for either of us.
He was my first boyfriend and i thought, hoped and prayed would be the last. I've always wanted just a guy in my life. He did his masters in kaduna while i served in minna. He chose it so we could be closer together. All through my service year, i was the one doing the visiting because he later started working in abj around that time which kept him busy and tired.
So, i thought it was only proper for me to be visiting.
We ended up having sex on one of the visits and that was 3 years down the relationship.

He's a very good guy, doesn't pressurize me, loves me, not promiscious, but he has a bad habit of not picking up hints and he doesn't know how to talk also.

Whenever i travelled, i went with foodstuffs, utensils and appliances he might need. So, it left me broke as a corper at times. At times, i randomly say I'm broke to him and he buys data when offline. My problem with that is i wish he payed more attention.
All through almost 4 years now, i never asked for a dime and he never gave me.

I once had a boi seminar in abj and of course i used the opportunity to see the love of my life. Nysc orientation camp was given as accommodation. So, there was this day i saw some clothes i liked and wished to buy. So, while chatting, i told him i saw some nice clothes i liked. I expected him to say something like let me add something for you but he merely said ehn ehn. Ended up buying all myself which he later saw too. This is just one instance. I honestly cant remember others. I don't keep tabs on things like this.

Before you castigate me, what I'm saying is i just want to feel special. All through the time i went to abj, he never for once took me out. We were always inside on weekends and i was always alone weekdays since i belonged to ministry of no work lol (served at local govt secretariat). I didn't hate it as i don't really like being around people.

I'm from a richer family than him which makes me have more money than him. I sort him out with little whenever he didn't have enough on him. I'm not comparing us now but even if i have, i just want him to be my man and make me feel loved by doing even little for me.

I'm very easy to please, very simple and i definitely love hard. Just writing me a note, buying me a book, basically little gestures can make me smile. I'm light hearted.

Trust was never an issue between us.

There were however days i wanted to break up with him because of his bad manners. (doesn't know how to talk and since I'm a words person, it gets to me a lot) He knows that but isn't willing to compromise on that little for me. This is our biggest problem. I'm quick to say sorry, thank you, i forgive you but him, he wouldn't talk to me for days till after so much teasing and cajoling from me..

Honestly, aside this, we are perfect for each other based on our mutual likes for stuffs but love is never enough.

THE FIGHT.
I told him i was broke. He wanted to purchase a shirt on aliexpress. i always do that for him and he sent 6k extra.
I knew the extra was for me but i just wanted him to say it. He got pissed. Didn't say but i knew and told me to ask anyone about the money situation. That is why he sent extra. That was the first time ever he decided to send me money so, i was surprised because there were several times he could have but didn't.
I told him the next day asking anyone wasn't necessary but i had something to say. I kind of let it all out. Not angrily, just said my mind. He was angry of course but i didn't think he would take it so serious. He compared me to his exs, said i have pride and don't appreciate stuffs. I was pissed he would say that to me cos it's not true.
What followed was "kindly send my money back"
Didn't expect it and it came as a shock. I really felt disgusted by that statement so i sent it to him.
Then he said kindly get yourself another boyfriend.
Ah ah, biggest shocked of my life and blocked me on whatsapp.

Reached him via text but he didn't reply. So, i gave him a break.
Later sent him a mail which he replied. We talked and seemed like we were having it back together and i merely asked him to apologize for he said to me and he said he wouldn't. All i wanted was i'm sorry for my harsh words.
I decided not to beg him this time. Each time we have issues which mostly he's wrong, i apologize. I really can't bear him not talking to him. I don't keep friends, i tell him everything like everything, my world basically evolves around him. My first bf, i don't believe in multi. He has been saying we should get married but i just don't have it together yet. So, i was already saying team 2020 lol.

I have never imagined myself with any other guy but why can't he just say something as little as I'm sorry.
I'm sorry to me can make me forgive anyone for anything they've done for me.

I don't always have to do the begging. What if we get married. I'd get tired of begging him.
There were times i wanted to break up with him but i always find a lot of reasons to stay and he'd beg me not to say it again but now its reversed and he can't even find a reason to stay. Really painful.

No calls, no messages. I'm going crazy.

Now that it seems like we've broken up, i can barely eat, sleep(always waking up with a swollen eyes from crying. My sisters already said i have apollo sef). I can't think straight, I'm slow etc
There are so many guys asking me out but i can't bring myself to go on dates.
It feels weird that it's not with him.

I basically don't know where to start from. It has just been one guy for almost 4 years. 17-21yrs.

How do i move on or forget him? is there an easy way?

This is just a brief summary. I can occupy the entire front page if were to go in details.

You can ask me questions.

Hmmmmmm.... Am searching and i need your kind of loyalty

let bygone be bygone.... Move on dear!!!


all is gone be fine

Nne just go and sleep, you will get over it wit tym move on thank God you are still vry young

And i hope you find it.

omoskenso:
Hmmmmmm.... Am searching and i need your kind of loyalty

Thanks but it's hard. Really hard.

Stevengerd:
let bygone be bygone....
Move on dear!!!



all is gone be fine

Sorry for how you're feeling right now. I think you made him have little or no respect for you in the relationship. You gave him all of you, you showed desperation and made him feel like you can't do without him, and he trampled on that.
In your next relationship don't show your man without him there can't be you.
I'll advice you to move on, do something with your time, learn a new skill to take your mind away from him. Get rid of any memory you have of him - delete pictures, block him on WhatsApp and any other social media as well. Make new friends, hang out with your siblings and friends. Go for week day or special programs in the church or mosque (depending on your religion).
Take heart dear.
My 2 cents!!

Thanks. I really hope i do.

Eleganza33:
Nne just go and sleep, you will get over it wit tym move on thank God you are still vry young

Does this kind of loyalty exist among the ladies.

Does this kind of loyalty exist?That dude is taking advantage of you. Kindly break up with him.

Bironke:
And i hope you find it.

That's if you let me keep searching.... Not interested in the incentives but your commitment

Thank you. I'll do that. I appreciate your words.

rexfada:
Sorry for how you're feeling right now. I think you made him have little or no respect for you in the relationship. You gave him all of you, you showed desperation and made him feel like you can't do without him, and he trampled on that.
In your next relationship don't show your man without him there can't be you.
I'll advice you to move on, do something with your time, learn a new skill to take your mind away from him. Get rid of any memory you have of him - delete pictures, block him on WhatsApp and any other social media as well. Make new friends, hang out with your siblings and friends. Go for week day or special programs in the church or mosque (depending on your religion).
Take heart dear.
My 2 cents!!

What a disgusting gold digger.
Must the man pay for your clothes?
Can't you work!!!!?
Why are women so useless, seems sweetbuns must be your relation.

Well, the age difference might be another reason he treats you like that. Some insecure and weak guys use that to make themselves feel good. Leave him to goan date his age mates. They'll show him the real stuff.
And as for you, find something productive to keep yourself busy and softly dey beg guys upandan, have some self esteem. U go dey alright las las

Bironke:
Thanks. I really hope i do.

u will. Abeg Nurse hatred 4 am spend time with friends do what makes u happy

Not up for this. I just need a clear head right now.

omoskenso:


That's if you let me keep searching.... Not interested in the incentives but your commitment

Maybe you didn't really get my point. It's not about the money. It never was. I never would have dated him if it was.
And i gave him a lot more than he gave me financially. He knows that too.

Bloooody:
What a disgusting gold digger.
Must the man pay for your clothes?
Can't you work!!!!?
Why are women so useless, seems sweetbuns must be your relation.

Bironke:
Not up for this. I just need a clear head right now.

You can have some space to heal.... But but falling in love with the right guy heals faster than been with yourself or trying to savage what's broken.

Bironke:
Maybe you didn't really get my point. It's not about the money. It never was. I never would have dated him if it was.
And i gave him a lot more than he gave me financially. He knows that too.

Then why are you complaining?
You're a woman and you must do your duties.
Cook, make kids, clean the home and open your legs when needed..
That's it.

Thank you. I'll try my best.

Eleganza33:
u will. Abeg Nurse hatred 4 am spend time with friends do what makes u happy

The best way to move on is simply to move on.. I didn't read the long story sha

Well Nothing Lasts Forever but I just hope you don't see me like something you regret! I still Love you but you' acted too needy & desperate from the start that anytime I offended you I don't give a damnn cause you always gonn' apologize like you needed the relationship more than I do but deep down I need it more than you but I never show cause I'm your first & i sometimes deceive myself you can't get over me... All Lies.. U Can Girl



The way i treated you & still treat you isn't cool which I'm not happy about but you're always saying sorry even when I'm wrong so I don't see no point for a sorry. Like You don't give me reason to say or show i'm Sorry. the word “SORRY“ is better shown by our actions than said but I'd try to show I'm sorry sometimes maybe you were too distracted to see.


For all the times i failed to say & show you how much i Love you AND the many times i didn't say sorry or Show i'm sorry for what i did! this my Apology. you need to be treated like the Queen you're for the many times i've failed to make you feel like a Queen this my apology. I compare you to my Ex's a lot of time but believe me they nothing compared to you, you the best thing that has happened to me for the past 4 years! I know i got bigger problems but I never knew I was insensitive Baby, you should've told me to my face so I try work on making things work better! I never knew you loved books I would've got U A Lot.

A friend keep asking me “Nigga Have you heard Justine Skye Back For More Featuring Jeremih”?? The chorus goes like this “You Don't Miss A Good Thing Until It's Gone, You Don't Take Me Serious Until I'm Done”. “A nigga won't know the good girl his missing until she's gone and when she does, he'll probably come back for more”. I Pray we work things out but just in case we don't work things out this my advice for you!

Don't Depend on anyone for your happiness. This way you give away a lot of power to the person and then it controls your actions, which isn't healthy in the long run. when you look for happiness in others, you become needy.


Hey, Love In as much as You Love me I want you to know you can Live without me, you can be happy without me & I'm not GOD Or Air that You can't Live Without. So stop crying Girl, Eat your Food, Be Happy They a Lot of Good Niggas more than I am that'll Love & Treat You Better. Gotta Go Love! Don't Call Me Till I Reach Out To You!!!! I Gotta Say & Show I'm Sorry This Time!!! Even When it's Hard I'll Try!

Love From Him2U
Passed Through Me

Even if I'm jobless, I will never read long lamentation like this
I'm very sure you are northerner lady.I like northerner ladies because of their loyalty which is very rear in southerner

You're funny. I'm actually yoruba.

Auladimeji1:
Even if I'm jobless, I will never read long lamentation like this
I'm very sure you are northerner lady.I like northerner ladies because of their loyalty which is very rear in southerner

Pidginwhisper:
See loyalty. Op come lemme marry you. @ this point your physical feature doesn't matter. Whether you're beautiful or ugly doesn't really matter but loyalty wise. Bae you don try. Drop your address make i come pay your bride price . I fit help you treat your boyfriend cum Ex fuckup sha.

Bironke:
You're funny. I'm actually yoruba.

Ibironke?A Yoruba damsel, loyal? Honestly, it's rear.I'm a southerner,that's the fact

Bironke:
You're funny. I'm actually yoruba.

Ibironke?A Yoruba damsel, loyal? Honestly, it's rear.I'm a southerner,that's the fact

@solz007 if only. Thank you.

Yes, Ibironke. I'm glad you said rare not impossible.

Auladimeji1:
Ibironke?A Yoruba damsel, loyal? Honestly, it's rear.I'm a southerner,that's the fact