₦airaland Forum

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

Lol you sound like a village man up there lol people don’t do that anymore,you have legs don’t you? you go to the kitchen to wash your hand before you eat and go back to wash it again when you are done,another thing is if don’t like what she cooked for you,go and cook something else for yourself
I wonder what you are doing at home if she is treating you badly, you don’t need to divorce just pack your things and leave.She has a job she will take care of the children
Wise up guys don’t divorce this days until they are ready to marry another woman, pack your things and get out

Capensis:
Will you pay attention and stop this victim mentality. It is either you will take advise, since you brought this matter to the court of public opinion, or you will narrate your experience, believe your wife is the worst woman and conclude that you are leaving a marriage. You are sounding emotional and your feedback system has totally clouded your judgment.

Pay attention:
Being a husband is a full-time job. Just like any job, it comes with serious responsibilities and repercussions if you fail to understand how the game is played.

1. It is your responsibility to get the money, pay the rent, pay kids school fees. You are the chief medical officer of your home, so everyone's health including your wife's and kids', are under your care.

2. You are the chief security officer of your home, you must check that all doors are locked at night and ensure the safety of everyone in the family.

3. You are the chief romance officer, you must master how to play women with sweet words, give her massage every evening, and make sweet love to her during the massage sessions, and I mean this. Get a massage table, it goes for about 180K to 300K for a good one. If you cant afford that, then buy massage mat. Prepare the oil and get some candles.

4. You must join her in the kitchen, even if there is a maid to do the chores and help her out, you must learn this. Wash those plates sometimes.

5. You must lie down with that woman on bed after sex, hold her face, and tell her truths and lies of how you love her. Then if you have nothing more to day, do some gossiping with her. Stroke her nicely and tell her how hard you are working to ensure your family is financial stable for the next 100 years.

6. You must stop thinking like your ancestors. Define your own path and ignore customary and traditional ways of running your home. Times have changed. Why wont you fetch water and wash your own hand. Seems she is the one doing all the kitchen work and you are the African man waiting to be served. It is not mandatory, besides do you know if her mother used to serve her father that way? It might be she got a different kind of training.

7. Do not ever think you have done enough, cos you havent done jack. If you feel that your wife is cheating, then rent a place somewhere else and move towards a different location. It does not matter if you own the house you are living now. Go and rent someplace nice for a year and move there and change your children's school so as to forget the shame and embarrassment your quarrel may have caused. If it is your house, you can return back after a year.

8. Always remember that most women are like babies. You must master how to lie to them if you know that truth will hurt. Learn all those skills from yahoo boys how they control white women and use it for your marriage. If you do it right, your wife might be giving your pocket money sometimes and you all will fall in love again.

You think your wife is bad? You have no idea. No one will tell you what is going on in their homes.

Master how to manipulate women, and you will control them like a intimacy gadget.

Thunder fire u by all means.

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

with this I think she doesn't want you.... the best you can ever do is to leave her alone.... it's not by force she can do anything at anytime

otipoju:
Yes. The signs are always there but we choose to ignore. Being a father is a thankless job so dont expect any pat on the back from her or even your children when they grow.

My big question to you now is " are you looking out and taking care of yourself" .

Do you take time to do the things you used to love that makes you happy.

For instance football is a big part of my life. My family knows that saturday evenings are for football where i can meet and socialize with other nigerian men.

You must take care of yourself and not loose your own self worth as a human being in a toxic marriage.

Tell her if you are not good enough for her, she has your utmost permission to go and get another husband

I tried to make the marriage work but realised I was only wasting my precious time.I've filed for divorce and she'll be served any moment from now.I wish to regain my sanity and move on with life.Thanks.

Eeya, sorry.

It's your cross, carry it.

That's why some of us have always been dictators and absolutists with women. It didn't fail us then and it is not failing us now. If one party has to be the submissive, docile 'mumu' in the Union, it has to be the woman. And we compensate her in our own way for being a good girl, for knowing her place. We blow hot and cold and keep ourselves happy, keep them happy, and make the world a happy place for us.

In everything, we keep at the back of our minds that these species are dispensable. Never give them a sense of utmost security and impunity. Even with the children, be ready to leave them all and burn the house down. Mean it. And make sure she knows it, from the beginning. It's not a 'trick' you learn at your old age. It has to be from Day 1. If you mumu from the beginning, then you are destined to be mumu to the end or to die in the process of liberation. No two ways.

When you decide to become a 'good' and 'patient' man who overlooks a lot and puts females on a pedestal, you're guaranteed to have a miserable life.

Nuff said.

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

this omoalata has never taken anything serious

..you are not happy any moment in your 8 years marriage, yet you keep sleeping with her to the extend of having 3 kids..!!! but you are happy in sex with her...what an irony.!!!

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

Sir, have you ever sat her down, and discuss everything you're not happy about her with her?
If you haven't, I'd advice you do so...
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT BEAT HER!!!


Pour put yourself to her and just leave her.

And then, take it to God in prayers!

The Bible says pray without ceasing... And have enough faith too.

She will change.

Peace Sir.

life is hard abeg

You have your life to live ... nobody can cut it short .. not even your wife..but if you allow woman wahala to cut your life short, you are on your own...

If she trouble you too much , leave everything for her and go and start single life elsewhere...if she's a good wife, she will reconcile but if she's bad,........

If you want my opinion, run for your life.
Make an arrangement to be supporting your kids, then run.

Similar experience. She is crying now.

/
Happy marital life rarely exists.

Manage your home as you see it.

You went into 21st century marriage with a 20th century mindset.

/

[quote author=OmoAlata1 post=76130745]You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me. [/quote
]
U sound like.Orubebe when GEJ was losing in 2015. Hateful bastard

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

What you are experiencing is the irony of life.

Some men have good wives but maltreat them.
Am sure you had 1 or 2 good girlfriends but decided to play them and marry the terrible woman due to selfish interest.

Game on! Endure it!!
Fast and pray!!
There is power in a praying man too

mhd5757:
That is why, I don't want to get married and even if I get a job, I am not going to marry anybody, I am keeping my money to myself and I am not sharing it with any woman.

I tend to live my life and enjoy it the way I want and no woman and a bunch of kids is going to stop me from doing so.

God has already made it clear to me that i am never going to be rich, well I don't mind because I am damn well going to live and enjoy and live my life with the little money I have. Afterall I'm a simple kind of guy, who does not need excess money to live and enjoy life.

Correct guy. I like people that cut their coat according their size. If you make money, you can adopt if you want.

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

Just shut up!

Citizen99:
..you are not happy any moment in your 8 years marriage, yet you keep sleeping with her to the extend of having 3 kids..!!! but you are happy in sex with her...what an irony.!!!

Men don't need to be happy with a woman to have sex with her.
Men sleep with anything even animals.

otipoju:
I feel your pain.
Marriage is not always easy and the feeling of regret is a terrible one.

But you have got to do some soul searching.
Ask yourself why she treats you that way.

How does she percieve you?
What signals are you sending out consciously or unconsciously.

What are you permitting that you should not.
What should you be doing that you are not.


Find out what it is, then flip it.

In this case words are a waste of time.

still not a reason to not respect her husband.

Never Marry a terrible girlfriend

peteruuu:
Sir, have you ever sat her down, and discuss everything you're not happy about her with her?
If you haven't, I'd advice you do so...
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT BEAT HER!!!


Pour put yourself to her and just leave her.

And then, take it to God in prayers!

The Bible says pray without ceasing... And have enough faith too.

She will change.

Peace Sir.

after 8 years

Omarizworld:
I'm taking this your narration with a sack of salt.
You claim to help her with chores while complaining she doesn't keep you dishes after you eat?
From your own side of the story, I can figure your story is very biased.
LIE LIE man.

Every story surely has too sides and I just said my part.Have you asked yourself if I was only doing all I could to ensure things work out and yet they don't.Love is a two way thing,when you give and don't get it back,will you end your life?

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

from her.

ok chief i admire your courage to voice out your frustrations on the issues facing your home and its a wonderful thing to accepts your weakness.
all that said,i will advice you have a heart to heart chat with her.

Ask her the following questions and her response will determine,if you will continue in the abusive relationship.

1.Love,if she still love you cos i bet you,if a woman love has expired nothing seems right again,if the answer is No,dont rush ask can it be re ignited.what are the thing shes expecting thats you are doing ?,if she gives a sensibles answer,then all hope not lost.

2.No one should talk to one another in abusive language when angry you are a man,make it a point of duty in the house,no one should ever talk in recklessly and careless way when angry cuz your words meant a lot.

Finally if there are no solutions and she cant change,please i beg you leave that marriage,a separation for now will be nice.
make it a point of duty to make amend and forgive if ever she ask for forgivness.
and the issues of cooking,washing hands,rejecting foods all these are pathetic and irresponsible argument to fight for in 2019,if you can't cook for the whole family or take water to wash your hand then you are very sillly.

Regards.

Capensis:
Will you pay attention and stop this victim mentality. It is either you will take advise, since you brought this matter to the court of public opinion, or you will narrate your experience, believe your wife is the worst woman and conclude that you are leaving a marriage. You are sounding emotional and your feedback system has totally clouded your judgment.

Pay attention:
Being a husband is a full-time job. Just like any job, it comes with serious responsibilities and repercussions if you fail to understand how the game is played.

1. It is your responsibility to get the money, pay the rent, pay kids school fees. You are the chief medical officer of your home, so everyone's health including your wife's and kids', are under your care.

2. You are the chief security officer of your home, you must check that all doors are locked at night and ensure the safety of everyone in the family.

3. You are the chief romance officer, you must master how to play women with sweet words, give her massage every evening, and make sweet love to her during the massage sessions, and I mean this. Get a massage table, it goes for about 180K to 300K for a good one. If you cant afford that, then buy massage mat. Prepare the oil and get some candles.

4. You must join her in the kitchen, even if there is a maid to do the chores and help her out, you must learn this. Wash those plates sometimes.

5. You must lie down with that woman on bed after sex, hold her face, and tell her truths and lies of how you love her. Then if you have nothing more to do, do some gossiping with her. Stroke her nicely and tell her how hard you are working to ensure your family is financial stable for the next 100 years.

6. You must stop thinking like your ancestors. Define your own path and ignore customary and traditional ways of running your home. Times have changed. Why wont you fetch water and wash your own hand. Seems she is the one doing all the kitchen work and you are the African man waiting to be served. It is not mandatory, besides do you know if her mother used to serve her father that way? It might be she got a different kind of training.

7. Do not ever think you have done enough, cos you havent done jack. If you feel that your wife is cheating, then rent a place somewhere else and move towards a different location. It does not matter if you own the house you are living now. Go and rent someplace nice for a year and move there and change your children's school so as to forget the shame and embarrassment your quarrel may have caused. If it is your house, you can return back after a year.

8. Always remember that most women are like babies. You must master how to lie to them if you know that truth will hurt. Learn all those skills from yahoo boys how they control white women and use it for your marriage. If you do it right, your wife might be giving you pocket money sometimes and you all will fall in love again.

Do you think your wife is bad? You have no idea. No one will tell you what is going on in their homes.

Master how to manipulate women, and you will control them like a intimacy gadget.

bless you

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

Treasured4eva you married her inspite of her surly attitude. You married her for her beauty and she married you because she wanted to get married, not because she loves you. It's a tit for tat thing so you must learn to carry your cross. Men are guilty of going after beautiful, flashy women and looking the other way when they're rude. They think beauty is everything. When they marry the woman and she begins to act like a poisonous snake, they come to NL to cry. Shiooor. You're on your own on this one. I'm sure there was a good woman you were dating, she loved you but you dumped her on meeting this poison.

Oga, you must carry your cross alone.

Oga you broke the first rule in marriage.
Never be the one to report your wife, push her to report you.
By the way your are just a sissy.

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

See prove below!

spiceadole:
What you are experiencing is the irony of life.

Some men have good wives but maltreat them.
Am sure you had 1 or 2 good girlfriends but decided to play them and marry the terrible woman due to selfish interest.

Game on! Endure it!!
Fast and pray!!
There is power in a praying man too

Treasured4eva don suffer on this thread. How do you know this? Why hate on someone based on some assumption? SMH

Khd95:
Start looking for a self contained apartment and leave the house for her,cos one day she might just lace ur food with otapiapia

Don't make troubles with her,just stay away from her,as for ur kids, report to Nigerian police or any relevant authority so that when u want to see them there won't be qualms,three kids are enough bro,if not the need to kill sexual urge and all,u can live a perfect life as a single man, better Still get a younger girl

I don't know if I made any sense shaa

Okay , a married man should go and get a younger girl... because of Marital issue....

I don't want to say you are eediot....
But your advice is not wise enough

When I see things like these, it only amuses me. Sorry for your troubles oo. But most of these symptoms are clear from the get go, men will neglect them and go on some maybe because of beauty of the woman involved.
Remember that your ex who was not so beautiful but gives you peace of mind that was your wife unfortunately for you. She is a blessing to another man.