Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

sorry bro, I feel your pains. My wife use to be like your wife but I forced her to change. From your description you maybe as gentle as I am but my own case I handle her with iron hand. Try to be a man enough. Someone is encouraging her and first deal with that,in my own case, it was her only sister who behave thesame to her husband, it get to some point I walk her out of my house and warn her, look family comes before an inlaw. Secondly it get to some point I arrested her, I know u can't do that, but that is what I did from her place of work then she discovers I can do anything. Act now before its too late. Now she is a good wife and a church girl as well.

Capensis:


Will you pay attention and stop this victim mentality. It is either you will take advise, since you brought this matter to the court of public opinion, or you will narrate your experience, believe your wife is the worst woman and conclude that you are leaving a marriage. You are sounding emotional and your feedback system has totally clouded your judgment.

Pay attention:
Being a husband is a full-time job. Just like any job, it comes with serious responsibilities and repercussions if you fail to understand how the game is played.

1. It is your responsibility to get the money, pay the rent, pay kids school fees. You are the chief medical officer of your home, so everyone's health including your wife's and kids', are under your care.

2. You are the chief security officer of your home, you must check that all doors are locked at night and ensure the safety of everyone in the family.

3. You are the chief romance officer, you must master how to play women with sweet words, give her massage every evening, and make sweet love to her during the massage sessions, and I mean this. Get a massage table, it goes for about 180K to 300K for a good one. If you cant afford that, then buy massage mat. Prepare the oil and get some candles.

4. You must join her in the kitchen, even if there is a maid to do the chores and help her out, you must learn this. Wash those plates sometimes.

5. You must lie down with that woman on bed after sex, hold her face, and tell her truths and lies of how you love her. Then if you have nothing more to do, do some gossiping with her. Stroke her nicely and tell her how hard you are working to ensure your family is financial stable for the next 100 years.

6. You must stop thinking like your ancestors. Define your own path and ignore customary and traditional ways of running your home. Times have changed. Why wont you fetch water and wash your own hand. Seems she is the one doing all the kitchen work and you are the African man waiting to be served. It is not mandatory, besides do you know if her mother used to serve her father that way? It might be she got a different kind of training.

7. Do not ever think you have done enough, cos you havent done jack. If you feel that your wife is cheating, then rent a place somewhere else and move towards a different location. It does not matter if you own the house you are living now. Go and rent someplace nice for a year and move there and change your children's school so as to forget the shame and embarrassment your quarrel may have caused. If it is your house, you can return back after a year.

8. Always remember that most women are like babies. You must master how to lie to them if you know that truth will hurt. Learn all those skills from yahoo boys how they control white women and use it for your marriage. If you do it right, your wife might be giving you pocket money sometimes and you all will fall in love again.

Do you think your wife is bad? You have no idea. No one will tell you what is going on in their homes.

Master how to manipulate women, and you will control them like a intimacy gadget.

I love you for this

Sometime is good to take a time out or break from situation like this just to see how things will play out in ur apsense.

Most times is always easier to take a decision when you take few steps back from a situation.

My BRO wisdom wisdom, If u understand what I mean.

If the reverse were the case would you advice a married of three to abandon her family and go be with a younger/older man?

Khd95:
Start looking for a self contained apartment and leave the house for her,cos one day she might just lace ur food with otapiapia

Don't make troubles with her,just stay away from her,as for ur kids, report to Nigerian police or any relevant authority so that when u want to see them there won't be qualms,three kids are enough bro,if not the need to kill sexual urge and all,u can live a perfect life as a single man, better Still get a younger girl

I don't know if I made any sense shaa

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

are you married if not stop being a pussy

Why are so many boys butt hurt over my comment? I must have hit a nerve bc I am secretly describing each and everyone of you all. E ma all right

Daddy wa, u r the cause of ur problem ooo..
U stated that she started as a bad girlfriend yet u proceeded to marry her.. Maybe d sex was awesome..
This is what Yoruba call afiowofa...
Na u use ur hand cause am...
Abeg fix ur poo..
If she no kill u one day... Then na hypertension go kill u..
Do u know how many men n women have died in relationship all cos they put d kids first...
Daddy wa... Ur health n happiness comes first... Am sure d kids have seen their mother's attitude so... It better u divorce ooo.
Love n marriage no be do or die...
Oyinbo wet even invent marriage self no dey carry am put for head as we do....
Once love no dey again... Dem go divorce amicably no wahala ooo

..

saao you arrest your wife ?

adewumiopeyemi:
If you not happy with her divorce is the next option dont kill ur see in an abusive relationship

Come to think about it, the woman in question might also be thinking and hoping for a divource. Do you know that women also go thru hellish situations in marraige but choose to remain quite mostly for peace? This man i definately believe has got or done terrible things to her for such acts to be exhibited. if a man truly loves a woman just like the Bible says, no woman will show such disrespect.
The man to me sounds like one who wouldn't also bother about the sensibilities of a woman's desires but Practically fulfilling the traditional vows of marraige. It's about doing the little things that matter most to her, common morning kisses alone is a miracle worker.

Man @ Op, check your weakness and adjust accordingly before you come here to spew about the woman who isn't here to defend herself!

mercy87:


I have sent you an email....please reply. I will love to chat with you if you don't mind.

Didn’t you read that he is married? Naso una they start

mercy87:


Oh my God ..I love this man already. So there are men like this on nairaland.

As in. See me scribbling his write-ups on my notepad as if he's Ghandi.
He has insight. I've learnt a lot today

Martinez39:
Not everyone believes in your book of fairy tales called bible and your god doesn't exist. My mum paid the rent and fed the family. There is no discretion, you are to assist your family in your capacity as you can be it man or woman. It is not written anywhere that the man must do everything. Marriage involves two people working together for their own good in love.

I am not stupid to expect that women would be like my mother. What my mother showed is that there is no excuse to insult and embarrass your man because he is broke. To insult and embarrass your man because he is broke and struggling is a choice and it takes a bad and disgusting soul to make that choice.

So you'll sit back and watch your run you home. I know a man that is like this op, even his children disrespect him.

She was a bad girlfriend and you ended up marrying her right?

I'm sure u turned a blind eyes probably because of her family's money or beauty.

Carry your cross in peace.

Globalbet1008:
⬇⬇⬇

Stop na

Treasured4eva:


First of all,run a thorough background check to know the kind of family she comes from because a lion can't give birth to a lamb.

Second,try to know her past.If you find anything messy she's done that you can't forgive her for,end it there.

Thirdly,check her temperament and the manner she reacts to the silly things you do.If she tends to be rude and aggressively challenges you;don't think twice,end it.

Also,check how much she values and respects you when you're alone,with family members and friends.
If she's angry and you ask her to calm down,how does she react?

Finally,check how she handles your home when she comes around."Charity truly begins at home".A woman without good home training can never make a good wife.

I obviously saw all these red flags but ignorantly overlooked them,hoping that she'll change,but I got more than what I bargained for.

It's a lie! You felt you were a "strong man" or a "21st century man" who could handle her. I am sure there were men like me that would have advised you then against marrying her. But you would have openly or silently called such men "weak men". Now see what you have gotten yourself into.

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
She was a bad girlfriend and you ended up marrying her right?

I'm sure u turned a blind eyes probably because of her family's money or beauty.

Carry your cross in peace.

He was blinded by love marriage is his eye opener

Martinez39:
Treasured4eva don suffer on this thread. How do you know this? Why hate on someone based on some assumption? SMH

Don't discard the assumption brother. That's why men still call their ex girlfriends after they are married cause the picture becomes clearer after marriage. No pity for such people.

This kind thing make me pack my things for just one small bag abandon everything else run for my life one early morning...I'm forever glad I did...

No be me one woman go kill before my time...

God forbid

You sound like a very low self esteem man. You had your wife arrested bc she was not following orders?I only blame all these desperate women who are making all you small boys believe you have huge balls

Saao:
sorry bro, I feel your pains. My wife use to be like your wife but I forced her to change. From your description you maybe as gentle as I am but my own case I handle her with iron hand. Try to be a man enough. Someone is encouraging her and first deal with that,in my own case, it was her only sister who behave thesame to her husband, it get to some point I walk her out of my house and warn her, look family comes before an inlaw. Secondly it get to some point I arrested her, I know u can't do that, but that is what I did from her place of work then she discovers I can do anything. Act now before its too late. Now she is a good wife and a church girl as well.

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

Seems you made her a reasonable part of your life which she know and is acting in it.
To tell you the truth see her as a worthless thing, do other things to make you happy and make your children your focal point.
Let me digress a little , confirm if the kids are yours.

Just sit down and go through what you just typed I hope u find out how stupid your reply is... If you have nothing good to say, kindly shut up and stop disgracing your family on a public forum..

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

spiceadole:


What you are experiencing is the irony of life.

Some men have good wives but maltreat them.
Am sure you had 1 or 2 good girlfriends but decided to play them and marry the terrible woman due to selfish interest.

Game on! Endure it!!
Fast and pray!!
There is power in a praying man too

Wow!You just hammered on the truth. That's exactly what happened. I respect you.

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

.


Haha... Are you his wife?... Relative?.... Maybe in-law?....

O ma all right

kingofthenorth:
Just sit down and go through what you just typed I hope u find out how stupid your reply is... If you have nothing good to say, kindly shut up and stop disgracing your family on a public forum..

Dump her sorry arse

Sorry Sir 4 All What U Av Been Through.I Will Advice U To Monitor Her With Every Means To Kw If She Has Someone Else. If True, Just Leave. God Help U [quote author=Treasured4eva post=76130625]I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.
I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shatt
She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.
I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.
My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the

Babyforever:
saao you arrest your wife ?

same thing I will do to you if you misbehave

Homeboiy:
Go and meet a strong dibia for better otumokpo



She has a strong juju that she use in controlling you

Go find a more powerful dibia for a stronger jazz


And your case is solved.

Take my advice or leave it

Treasured4eva:
I've never been happy for almost 8 years of marriage with 3 wonderful kids.I wake up everyday asking God how I got entangled with the worse woman I've ever met in my life.

I'm a very responsible and decent man who provides for his family.My family has always been my priority, but my wife's disrespectful attitude towards me has rendered me hopeless,shattered and broken.

She insults me at any slightest argument,raises her voice to attract the attention of neighbours and the kids whenever we have a misunderstanding.She hates been talked to,even if she's wrong.

I have my own imperfections too as a man,but it really baffles me when a woman you paid her bride price sees you as trash,challenges you in a very rebellious and arrogant manner for the whole time you've ever spent with her.

My kids has been the ones keeping me from leaving the marriage since I've complained to virtually all her family members yet it seems to be worse. I die in silence and pains everyday.

My wife can't serve me food with water to wash my hands,I'll always go and wash my hands myself and mostly take the plates back to the kitchen if the maid didn't do it.She has never asked why I rejected a particular food,she'll just take it away without remorse.

I'm just nothing to her and her family members. Her sister even called me to warn and threaten me one certain time we had problem.It even became worse when she got a job,I'm a laughing stock because I lost my job.

I usually send her money to pay the kids fees,I was owing some little amount this term,surprisingly,the gave the school accountant my number to embarrass me.

I've come to realize that any woman disloyal to her husband definitely has someone she's loyal to and if you don't let her go,she might end up killing you or you do the unthinkable out of frustration.

Divorce might not be the best way to end an unhappy marriage,but it can surely prolong the lives of the couples involved. Kids will surely grow into adults someday to understand things. This is my point of no return.

She started as a terrible girlfriend and ended as a bad wife.I pray my daughters don't ever take after their mother because I can't wish a fellow man what I've experienced for almost 8 years.No body should ever marry a man or woman with flaws thinking they'll change with time;they don't change,they only get worse.

Lots of people are really misquoting me.I only lost a high paying job but still got a very big business which is already yielding income,just that my spending pattern changed.I still run all aspects of mybhome.

My wife's money remains her business and she's not mandated to spend it on me or the family.I truly assist her to the best of my ability in domestic chores and otherwise.

She's a very bad tempered woman that doesn't regard or respect me and that's where the problem lies.My only crime is that I wanted respect from her.

Man...You have caused this all by your self.She didn't change when she was just a gf yet u married her out of pity?or u guys have stayed too long in relationship and you don't want her to feel heart broken?or You are getting old and you want to get married early..None of this has given any excuses for u to displease your self to please someone who don't appreciate your concern about her.

Well.....
It's never too late,You are man and a man must always learn to survive in all ways...These are my cents of solution to your worries:

1.Since she doesn't recognise you as the Husband,then Your only concern should be on your kids.
2.Don't expect any food from her,thankGod you have a maid.Ask her to prepare you the food and sometimes get up and go to the kitchen to prepare what you want.
3.Always provide for all their needs,including your wife.No arguement and if she ask you for some money you can't afford,tell her gently that you don't have up to the amount and give her what you have.
4.Concentrate more on your business and kids.
5.pray and fast concerning this
6.If you are bored sometimes,chill out with some friends


The other way round...
1.file for divorce,your life is important..If this keeps continue,she might end up resulting to violence

Buh in all because of your kids,go for the first option.

OmoAlata1:
You sound like those husbands that will emotionally drained their wives. I know your type very well. You can fool others with your poor me victim card post but not me.

What a beautiful way to professionally proffer solution... Haba. From frying pan to fire