kennygee:


I'm not an advocate of staying in a marriage with domestic abuse, I advise separation in that instance.

Some women are Jezebels, they just want to pitch their tent with a man they think they can control, even if he has a family.

If she leaves, she will only make it easier for these women to ruin her home.

kennygee:
Dear woman, I can imagine the emotional and psychological pain you're going thru, however, making a decision right now might not be wise cause it will be an emotional one.

Just keep praying for him and ask God for strength to overcome. It is only when there's a crack in the wall that a lizard can enter.

Start working out the little way you can, start dressing really nice, so nice you'll get compliments outside. It will improve your self esteem, wear make up, smell nice. It might not stop him from cheating but it will build up your self esteem and confidence so much that you'll see you're not the problem.

You'll be in a better place to decide if you want to stay with him or leave.

All the best.

I hope you have a job or a business sha?

Cause the best security a woman can have is her own money.

ojkalito:
Did you know life is short? Would you rather spend it with one who body shame you, abuse you emotionally and mentally or live independently and be free of the aforementioned?

Needtolove:
Hi nairalanders this post is going to be quite disorganized, as I am not such a good writer. Just need an avenue to let our some steam. No advise needed too. The only way forward for me is to quit my marriage.

The reason for this write up is to ease the pain of betrayal that comes from my husband cheating on me with a our neighbor,what really hurts is that after I investigated and found out her identity, I presented him with hard evidence ,instead of an apology he said he is an African man o and polygamy is allowed. He says I should better mind my business as the said girl is not disturbing me. He further stated that the girl is crazy o, so I should not even think of confronting her

Just this morning she had the nerve to come to my apartment with her room mate to clarify some house issues. The nerve of all of them. Really want to make them pay. Really want to make my husband suffer.
This guy body shames me at any chance he gets. (I have a four month old baby) he says am ugly and shapless, and my breast are flat

I want African men to know that women have feelings too, am expected to bottle up my pain and be a woman. When I react violently he calls me mad woman. He is still with her and I am still expected to mind my business.
I will though, but they will both get it.

SageMK:
Sorry you have to go through this but I am glad you've made up your mind to divorce him. Life is just too short.

Anyway, allow me to correct a misconception you have.



African men aren't what your husband painted us out to be. The fact that he's a scumbag and he lacks decency have nothing to do with his race or the colour of his skin.

He knows you've feelings. He just doesn't care at all. So call out your husband for his crimes but do not bash us along. If only you scrutinized him well before marriage...

Chiefochiefo:
[s]The only problem am seeing here is you. Yes YOU!
It is you because you are porknosing, it is you because you are not minding your business, it is you because you left a four month old baby looking for a proof that is worthless, it is you because you have left your former life as a beautiful woman to a full time mama, and it is you because you fail to understand that a man whose wife just gave birth will have to leave her for sex for sometimes.
My advise is this, since he has told you your faults, try and make up, pretend like you don't mind his mess again, give yourself time, build up your morales, be jovial, focus on making yourself beautiful like when he first met you. Remember, women has the gift of beauty. Do this, your hubby will come back to you magically. It's an advise.[/s]

Fuqman:
It's not African to maltreat or cheat on your spouse. However, a cheat is a cheat irrespective of the continent or whatsoever. African women, wake your damn lazy a*sses up and become independent. Get a life or something.. I've come to realize that, men hardly mess up with independent women.

Needtolove:
Hi nairalanders this post is going to be quite disorganized, as I am not such a good writer. Just need an avenue to let our some steam. No advise needed too. The only way forward for me is to quit my marriage.

The reason for this write up is to ease the pain of betrayal that comes from my husband cheating on me with a our neighbor,what really hurts is that after I investigated and found out her identity, I presented him with hard evidence ,instead of an apology he said he is an African man o and polygamy is allowed. He says I should better mind my business as the said girl is not disturbing me. He further stated that the girl is crazy o, so I should not even think of confronting her

Just this morning she had the nerve to come to my apartment with her room mate to clarify some house issues. The nerve of all of them. Really want to make them pay. Really want to make my husband suffer.
This guy body shames me at any chance he gets. (I have a four month old baby) he says am ugly and shapless, and my breast are flat

I want African men to know that women have feelings too, am expected to bottle up my pain and be a woman. When I react violently he calls me mad woman. He is still with her and I am still expected to mind my business.
I will though, but they will both get it.

Needtolove:
Hi nairalanders this post is going to be quite disorganized, as I am not such a good writer. Just need an avenue to let our some steam. No advise needed too. The only way forward for me is to quit my marriage.

The reason for this write up is to ease the pain of betrayal that comes from my husband cheating on me with a our neighbor,what really hurts is that after I investigated and found out her identity, I presented him with hard evidence ,instead of an apology he said he is an African man o and polygamy is allowed. He says I should better mind my business as the said girl is not disturbing me. He further stated that the girl is crazy o, so I should not even think of confronting her

Just this morning she had the nerve to come to my apartment with her room mate to clarify some house issues. The nerve of all of them. Really want to make them pay. Really want to make my husband suffer.
This guy body shames me at any chance he gets. (I have a four month old baby) he says am ugly and shapless, and my breast are flat

I want African men to know that women have feelings too, am expected to bottle up my pain and be a woman. When I react violently he calls me mad woman. He is still with her and I am still expected to mind my business.
I will though, but they will both get it.

Needtolove:
Hi nairalanders this post is going to be quite disorganized, as I am not such a good writer. Just need an avenue to let our some steam. No advise needed too. The only way forward for me is to quit my marriage.

The reason for this write up is to ease the pain of betrayal that comes from my husband cheating on me with a our neighbor,what really hurts is that after I investigated and found out her identity, I presented him with hard evidence ,instead of an apology he said he is an African man o and polygamy is allowed. He says I should better mind my business as the said girl is not disturbing me. He further stated that the girl is crazy o, so I should not even think of confronting her

Just this morning she had the nerve to come to my apartment with her room mate to clarify some house issues. The nerve of all of them. Really want to make them pay. Really want to make my husband suffer.
This guy body shames me at any chance he gets. (I have a four month old baby) he says am ugly and shapless, and my breast are flat

I want African men to know that women have feelings too, am expected to bottle up my pain and be a woman. When I react violently he calls me mad woman. He is still with her and I am still expected to mind my business.
I will though, but they will both get it.

Fuqman:
It's not African to maltreat or cheat on your spouse. However, a cheat is a cheat irrespective of the continent or whatsoever. African women, wake your damn lazy a*sses up and become independent. Get a life or something.. I've come to realize that, men hardly mess up with independent women.

sisisioge:
4ks!

He did that! 4kssss! Blowdyfellow!

What do you want to do without getting in trouble? Chai! Can you arrange to travel out of the country while liquidating all his assets while at it? As in, you will sell his properties at ridiculous rates, spoil all the unsellable, send a picture of him and the girl to his work place, then call his family to tell them on your way out. Remember not to tell him where u are going o.


Pele...pull yourself together though. Do not let them see your anger.

kennygee:


My dear, I've learned to not be too quick to advise a woman to leave her marriage.

If you've watched "War Room", you'll realize that some marital problems can be sorted out in prayer.

If her life is in danger, then I'll advise separation.

nwanneni:
thanks bro,I'll try and do as you say.
It's sleeping tonight that I don't know how to do yet.
I wish I was in 9ja,I'd have smoked all of the Indian hemp in the world and drink to foolishness.
GOD!!!!!

greggng:
We lack comprehension in this country ...read through her message, she said she doesn't need advice....I still wonder why some people they try advice her....for what? She wanna end the marriage that is why she doesn't need advice. Make una free her....a stubborn grasshopper will always rest in peace in the stomach of a bird

Fuqman:
It's not African to maltreat or cheat on your spouse. However, a cheat is a cheat irrespective of the continent or whatsoever. African women, wake your damn lazy a*sses up and become independent. Get a life or something.. I've come to realize that, men hardly mess up with independent women.

TheNaijanBlog:
Hahaha you do know ‘War Room’ is fiction right? I am sorry no amount of prayers can change a cheating man. If not we won’t have many pastors with prayer warriors as wife still cheating on their wives.

kennygee:


I'm not saying all these is palatable, I'm sure there are reasons she married this man. Good qualities the man, she just has to weigh her pros and cons and pray.

I'm telling you a lot of battles can be won on a prayer altar.

I am not saying she should leave right away, I'm saying she should try her best to make it work, if it doesn't work, then she can leave.

That's why I asked if she has a job or business.

TheNaijanBlog:
Hahaha you do know ‘War Room’ is fiction right? I am sorry no amount of prayers can change a cheating man. If not we won’t have many pastors with prayer warriors as wife still cheating on their wives.

ojkalito:
One bad character can ruin an entire beautiful union regardless of how good he was, secondly she might not be a Christian or believes in prayer. Being employed or having a business is where I agree with you

Seun:
Agreed. I just couldn't help myself when I stumbled on the topic.

ibkayee:

LAWMA

Chiefochiefo:
The only problem am seeing here is you. Yes YOU!
It is you because you are porknosing, it is you because you are not minding your business, it is you because you left a four month old baby looking for a proof that is worthless, it is you because you have left your former life as a beautiful woman to a full time mama, and it is you because you fail to understand that a man whose wife just gave birth will have to leave her for sex for sometimes.
My advise is this, since he has told you your faults, try and make up, pretend like you don't mind his mess again, give yourself time, build up your morales, be jovial, focus on making yourself beautiful like when he first met you. Remember, women has the gift of beauty. Do this, your hubby will come back to you magically. It's an advise.

Chiefochiefo:
The only problem am seeing here is you. Yes YOU!
It is you because you are porknosing, it is you because you are not minding your business, it is you because you left a four month old baby looking for a proof that is worthless, it is you because you have left your former life as a beautiful woman to a full time mama, and it is you because you fail to understand that a man whose wife just gave birth will have to leave her for sex for sometimes.
My advise is this, since he has told you your faults, try and make up, pretend like you don't mind his mess again, give yourself time, build up your morales, be jovial, focus on making yourself beautiful like when he first met you. Remember, women has the gift of beauty. Do this, your hubby will come back to you magically. It's an advise.

kennygee:
Dear woman, I can imagine the emotional and psychological pain you're going thru, however, making a decision right now might not be wise cause it will be an emotional one.

Just keep praying for him and ask God for strength to overcome. It is only when there's a crack in the wall that a lizard can enter.

Start working out the little way you can, start dressing really nice, so nice you'll get compliments outside. It will improve your self esteem, wear make up, smell nice. It might not stop him from cheating but it will build up your self esteem and confidence so much that you'll see you're not the problem.

You'll be in a better place to decide if you want to stay with him or leave.

All the best.

I hope you have a job or a business sha?

Cause the best security a woman can have is her own money.

Frankiss44:



Very silly putting all the blame on the innocent woman and not even a swipe at the goat that calls himself a husband... One thing is to cheat, another thing is to justify it and even insult the woman you married because of a slut that is probably sharing the pussy to every dick and Harry...


The man is goat and the woman needs some form of separation from him, even if divorce isn't the immediate solution.