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What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? - Jobs/Vacancies (6) - Nairaland

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Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Puregold3(f): 9:11am On Jul 16, 2019
dannybrasky:

Back then in Bariga after secondary school,did waec and was waiting for result . As a born hustler,I would do any legit job to make sure I have my own little cash at hand. Name it, any hard job,omo boy was always ready lol.

I tried hard but couldn't get something to do until a friend of mine asked if I would work as a sand lifter with basket from the lagoon at bariga. Mehn I was do danm happy like yaay I have finally gotten myself a gig lol,but guys I was wrong as what I saw wasn't what I expected grin

Got to the lagoon down down after king sunny Ade's house,can't remember the name of the street. From the lagoon you can clearly see third mainland bridge.

Oh b4 I forget,being overwhelmed with happiness I didn't bother asking what the pay was like. Fast forward got to the lagoon,saw some giant well chiseled bros them, going into the lagoon with basket to park sand and then bring it to the shores of the lagoon. As a strong omo boy I was still like no shaking I go chop this job for breakfast easy pizzy lol.

Then came the shocker, there was this bros that was suppose to direct me on how to go about it,his name is Egbon Mufu. I asked some of the guys at the shore pls I'm asking for egbon Mufu,and then one pointed me at a direction and said there he is. Egbon Mufu was just coming out of the water with heavy basket of sand looking huge and well chiseled like a Greek god. I watched the way he struggled a bit to find his way to
shore in order for him to dump the sand he got from the lagoon.

He dumped the sand, stood there and was breathing heavily. And then one of the guys called him to inform him I was looking for him. NOTE, egbon Mufu was backing us when he was called upon,reacting to the call egbon couldn't turn his neck he had to turn his whole body cos his neck has already gotten stiff due to the pressure from the heavy basket of sand he carried couple with latic acid burning. In my mind I was like wtf,na so I won take die? Na so my neck go come break grin We concluded on how I would go about the job,he told me to pull of my clothes as I have to work with boxers alone lol. Me wey be say as soon as I saw the neck issue I already made up my mind to salo lol. Na so I tell am say I no wear pant say make I go buy boxers to wear grin He then replied saying eat b4 u come back o,I say no wahala egbon. If I'm to ever see egbon Mufu again that would be today grin I jejely went back home to hug my bed grin grin grin Too young to die grin

This is the funniest job ever.
so, u scammed egbon abi...
Ur lie was epic

28 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by unikprince(m): 9:12am On Jul 16, 2019
Got a job as a Stockkeeper in a newly built open bar in Delta state in 2013 immediately after my NYSC, salary was 15k. I became an errand boy to the manager, I was even assisting to sell beer whenever customers are much, it wasn't an experience to remember as I used to work from 6am -1am, no time to rest/sleep since I live and sleeps at the manager's office then. embarassed embarassed
I cried from Enugu down to Sapele after I was rejected by a UBA interviewer because I was 1yr older than the required age they wanted. Fast forward to 3yrs later when the Bar was almost crumbling due to mismanagement, I took the risk of taking it on lease from the owner, I became the MD, advised the owner to convert the VIP section to rooms and boom, it was like a windfall. Made my first million by December 2016, bought my first 2 plots of land, started training my younger brother in the university, started paying fees for some fatherless children, made sure I assist in my little way in helping those in need, tried to relocate to Canada in 2017 but was duped by the agent, bought another land worth millions last, my younger bro is graduating this year (I single handedly saw him thru school), made my parents smile and proud. grin grin grin.
Now I want to try my luck of relocating again.
Of a truth it pays to be patient atimes, I have not gotten to my destination, but I'm not where I used to be, God took me from d slums blessed me even when I don't deserve it. Glory to God forever.

110 Likes 6 Shares

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by sparog(m): 9:14am On Jul 16, 2019
Eaugusta:

Well, in my opinion it's not.
He didn't apply wisdom

You're right that he didn't apply wisdom but he was still brave enough to chase after something that was not certain yet over something certain

3 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by LordAdam16: 9:15am On Jul 16, 2019
ThothHermes:
I had graduated and was waiting for induction. I needed money for clearance, suit and other stuff like mad so I was willing to do anything. After knocking on half the company doors in Apapa, my friend and I finally got "work" at Oxford factory; makers of the popular Cabin and Digestive biscuits.
Daily wage was 800. The work was evil. Six to six with a one hour break. Trying to keep up with machines for hours on end.
Every section of the factory was designed to kill. Packaging, mixing, stamping, name it. There was no end to it. The machines just wouldn't stop.
Work for 10 people would be assigned to three people.
Thunder fire those Indians and the Nigerians enabling them. Those bastards would still try to pay you less than the useless wage on one flimsy excuse or the other.
It was hell. The revolutionary in me always wanted to fight them. I felt so bad (still do) for the men and women would would still beg to do that dehumanizing work.
There was a limit to the number of workers needed each day so people were turned back when the limit was exceeded.
Come and see people's fathers and mothers begging to be enslaved. People dey suffer sha.
My friend had a 50kg ? bag of flour dropped on his neck from a storey by mistake. He complained for days. He is well built so it was nothing serious. Someone else would have landed in the hospital.

I will put a stop to all forms of slavery when I become Commander-in-Chief because that's what that was; and still is because I'm sure nothing has changed. I even hear it's worse in other factories.
Did I mention there was no limit to the number of biscuits you could consume grin grin

See this too many times, that maybe it's necessary to set the record straight.

Factory and warehouse jobs the world over are terrible. Go read accounts about minimum-wage workers in Amazon processing centers who have to pee in bottles to save time. That's a company with a $990b market cap.

This also explains why automation is seeing rapid growth in that sector, with the hope that the factories and warehouses of the future will not employ humans.

The question really is would you or anyone you know buy cabin biscuit for N40 apiece to help provide the "humane" working conditions you hastily propose for the factory workers? Or isn't this just the ironic conundrum that those who decry conditions regarded as representative of modern slavery are often the most price-conscious consumers.

Same individuals who'd go to a local eatery (commonly called mama put) and want a large serve of rice, beans, plantain, two large-sized cuts of meat all for less than $1 if possible. And then when they're told the worker is paid less than 10k monthly after "slaving" from 6 to 6, they begin fuming like they've ever tipped or make it a point to pay excess.

If you think you can run a factory that pays much better, gives lots of breaks, paid vacations, even maternity/paternity leave to low-skilled workers; while simultaneously offering low market price or even better undercutting the competition, paying off your double-digit loans timely, and providing double-digit returns to investors and shareholders; please write a business plan and I can guarantee you you'd become a billionaire in 5 years as capital will find you instead of the other way around.

Gala has been sold at 50 naira for over 10 years. In that same time minimum wage has risen from 9800 to 30000, and NGN/USD rate has risen from 100/$ to 360/$. Now if UAC says they want to increase the price to 150 to match the wage and rate increase; how many of you would buy?

This is the type of economic illiteracy that leads to the election of nutjobs like Buhari and AOC.

There's no emotion in the jungle or the real world. Employers do not just arbitrarily choose what to pay workers, the market determines what to pay workers.

That is why entry doctors in Nigeria earn $6000 while their mates in the US earn 6 figures. The difference however is that while childbirth by CS in Nigeria stays below $800 in total; in the US, it goes for about or over $10k (you can check the giving birth thread on NL). In fact, a woman was quoted $877,000 after having triplets. Heart transplants can reach 7 figures.

I'd like to see people proffer solutions on how to address wage inequality without the emotional-laden diatribes. That last bit disgusts me!

-Lord

75 Likes 15 Shares

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by tbabs10166(m): 9:16am On Jul 16, 2019
Agbalanze:
After my NYSC, I didnt want to stay at home so i got a job in a factory, there was no vacancy for B.Sc/ Eng so i accepted the SSCE/OND slot which is more or less a hard labour.
Pay was 15k/month but if you miss work a day
, they will minus 1k and if you come late, minus 2h. Work is Monday to saturday and it's 2wks day, 2wks night. Company pays half price your lunch (N50) and you pay half (N50), and monthly tax was 5h meaning your take home is roughly 13k.
There was this month I missed work for 8days starting from 1st and came late 2 times, after calculating what my pay will be if I work the remaining days , I just left and didn't return.
your salary is 15k for 1 month excluding sundays which makes it roughly 25days in a month and that's equivalent to 600 naira per day. 15,000/25 = #600 per day, yet they take away 1k if u miss a day Haahaa some people no get conscience at all o.

11 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by MisterKings(m): 9:16am On Jul 16, 2019
lilmax:
well my annual pay was more than18m at that time

got an offer, I saw 6m, rejected it immediately undecided

Linus Mba

7 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by namiji2598: 9:19am On Jul 16, 2019
MubarakMukhtar:
Please are you guys serious about what you are saying cox it's really panicking and terrible, am just a fresh graduate waiting for service, my mind always telling me that I will be posted to federal government institution for ppa where after my successful service year they wouldn't hesitate to retain me be their temporary worker b4 being parmanented, definitely my salary going to start like somewhere from 120k above per month.




To me own surprise am here seeing 800 2k and highest 18k per month as personal salary.
What a shock? Was it am ambitious ����
my brother life is not what it seems

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 9:20am On Jul 16, 2019
peteruuu:

grin grin grin me too abeg grin
Hope I'm not too late?

You're welcome grin cheesy

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Francisayo(m): 9:20am On Jul 16, 2019
ezrael360:
A private school offered me a teaching job about 3months ago to teach Chemistry and mathematics from SS1 to SS3 (3arms for each class for maths) for 15k per month with my second class degree and NYSC discharge cert. I turned it down outrightly. He has already stressed me with several screenings before tabling his offer, I was so gutted. To the glory of God am the quality control officer of a reputable firm as I'm typing write now.
My advice to you all reading this who is yet to get a job, don't let desperation and circumstance make u settle for less when you know you're far worth more, when you take those offers u miss out on the bigger ones coming. Stay blessed you all

I studied chemistry too...i dnt know if there's still any vacancy offer at ur firm
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 9:22am On Jul 16, 2019
abkrgumel:

Na my place o

Nooo
Lemme give you your own grin grin

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by alphaNomega: 9:22am On Jul 16, 2019
fatymore:
I will work from Sunday to Monday and close by 8pm...

It was only God that said I should not take the offer and I just rounded up my HND program. I got a job after that...

But Sunday to Monday is only 2 days undecided

5 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by uncleck: 9:26am On Jul 16, 2019
The factory work I am currently doing. 20k/month.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Nobody: 9:27am On Jul 16, 2019
BianoJay:
Was crazily in search of a job after graduation, finally found a company who was even ready to interview me. Interview was for the post of manager of small printing press. Did so well in the interview, and computer tests that the owner of the company had to make me a typist instead of manager���� angry grin grin angry angry
Pay was 20k. Qualification: B.Sc Public Administration, 2.1 grin grin grin
Told me my salary was to be reviewed upwards, after a month. Worked for four months, no review, no salary...I sha advised myself and took off
wait u mean thy didn't pay u for the four months?
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by BianoJay(m): 9:30am On Jul 16, 2019
pesinfada:
wait u mean thy didn't pay u for the four months?

Nope!
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by bentwood85(m): 9:33am On Jul 16, 2019
Bankalert:
Let me kuku drop my own here.... At one time after secondary school, while I was looking for a job and admission to uni, I got this cleaner job, the pay was 5k in 2009. When I started the first day, it seemed okay... I even ran errands for her after cleaning and got to keep one small change...and was feeling happy... Lol

The second day was something else... I resumed very early and was cleaning when the owner of the school came from nowhere and said while cleaning the class, I should be scrubbing the dirty wall(painted wall) of the class rooms... She even demonstrated it for me... In my mind, I was like on top how much nah... Just because I was desperate for a job?... My previous job paid even twice more... Na so I tell am say I don hear... But nah tomorrow things I go implement am. After close of work at noon, that was the last she heard of me. I am sure she was still waiting for me to come and be scrubbing the walls for her... Smh

Abi is it the one that, someone looked at all my qualifications in Lagos for a teacher job, b.sc first class in a biological science course, plus certifications and priced me 23 k which I still took out of desperation... But to God be the glory, I am in a better place now(FG job abj) , not there yet but soon I will be.... I will refer to this in the nearest future.. Peace!

Bros! Please How did you get the FG job?.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Nobody: 9:34am On Jul 16, 2019
BianoJay:


Nope!
no pay?
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Nobody: 9:36am On Jul 16, 2019
Gracealone:


The pay is not fantastic bro. The average pay for most attendants and porters at Dubai Airport is AED 4,500/month.
If you use Naija level to calculate your income, no be Naija level you go take spend am o.
That's true!
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by armadeo(m): 9:36am On Jul 16, 2019
Olamsoh:
"What is the most ridiculous job offer you have ever received?"

Applied as an Operations Manager in an iron company. I was offered d job. 3months later, dey sack d gateman & handed d key 2me. I wil be d 1 to opn d gate,wash d toilet,mob d offices,go 2 bank evryday 2 deliver client cheques plus multiple insult frm my boss r.All dis for 40k

Let us hear from you.


Bleep!!!! Is this for real or you made it up.

Bleep!!!!!
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by healthpal: 9:37am On Jul 16, 2019
this thread is funny, interesting and inspirational...lol...

2 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by abkrgumel(m): 9:37am On Jul 16, 2019
PrincessB1:


Nooo
Lemme give you your own grin grin
Oya bring it to me now now b4 I coz trouble

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by BarrElChapo(m): 9:38am On Jul 16, 2019
na to buy milk and milo every day dey come work na grin
ThothHermes:
I had graduated and was waiting for induction. I needed money for clearance, suit and other stuff like mad so I was willing to do anything. After knocking on half the company doors in Apapa, my friend and I finally got "work" at Oxford factory; makers of the popular Cabin and Digestive biscuits.
Daily wage was 800. The work was evil. Six to six with a one hour break. Trying to keep up with machines for hours on end.
Every section of the factory was designed to kill. Packaging, mixing, stamping, name it. There was no end to it. The machines just wouldn't stop.
Work for 10 people would be assigned to three people.
Thunder fire those Indians and the Nigerians enabling them. Those bastards would still try to pay you less than the useless wage on one flimsy excuse or the other.
It was hell. The revolutionary in me always wanted to fight them. I felt so bad (still do) for the men and women would would still beg to do that dehumanizing work.
There was a limit to the number of workers needed each day so people were turned back when the limit was exceeded.
Come and see people's fathers and mothers begging to be enslaved. People dey suffer sha.
My friend had a 50kg ? bag of flour dropped on his neck from a storey by mistake. He complained for days. He is well built so it was nothing serious. Someone else would have landed in the hospital.

I will put a stop to all forms of slavery when I become Commander-in-Chief because that's what that was; and still is because I'm sure nothing has changed. I even hear it's worse in other factories.
Did I mention there was no limit to the number of biscuits you could consume grin grin
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by alphaNomega: 9:38am On Jul 16, 2019
MubarakMukhtar:
Please are you guys serious about what you are saying cox it's really panicking and terrible, am just a fresh graduate waiting for service, my mind always telling me that I will be posted to federal government institution for ppa where after my successful service year they wouldn't hesitate to retain me be their temporary worker b4 being parmanented, definitely my salary going to start like somewhere from 120k above per month.




To me own surprise am here seeing 800 2k and highest 18k per month as personal salary.
What a shock? Was it am ambitious ����

Muktar if you have the connection to get a government job, start using it now! Some of the stories you read here are true.

5 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by BianoJay(m): 9:39am On Jul 16, 2019
pesinfada:
no pay?

No pay.

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by alphaNomega: 9:39am On Jul 16, 2019
Edonice:
I was once called by one of the big entertainment center in Edo state (kada plaza) for an interview, that very day I was so exited and highly elated, I had high expectations and hopes that i was about to start a career in a big firm, I ironed my trousers and starched my shirt.
On that faithful day I matched magestically to the center for the interview there i met other potential employees, I was confident in my self because I know the kind of stuff I am made up of.

It all began when we were asked to que up and one after the other we began to go into the office of the MD for the interview. I was eager for it to get to my turn as I wanted to unleash my persona on the MD.

Finally it got to my turn and I walk into the MD office head high, when I got there I was asked to introduced my self which I did, the MD was an Indian man asking me all sort of questions in his Indian ascent I kept answering him and lecturing him on the job of which I was being interview for..

When he was satisfied that I could handle the position effectively it can to the stage of salary negotiation..

He asked how much will I like to be paid I told him i am open to negotiation. Then the shocker came he started from 10000 then 15000 and finally he said the best the company can pay is 18000 naira.

I just walked out of his office and started heading back home

Lesson : you should not judge a book by its Cover.

I am still job hunting, praying hard to get a job at least that can make me settle down and start a family.

That's my story

Next time start with N300,000 and give reasons why you should earn such. It is called negotiation for a reason.

3 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Zzyy(m): 9:40am On Jul 16, 2019
dedons:
As usual, I'm here to read lies.

grin grin guy why grin grin
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Nobody: 9:40am On Jul 16, 2019
BianoJay:


No pay.
lol

But where dia client?
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 9:41am On Jul 16, 2019
princeade86:
pls get me one also with popcorn. laugh wan burst my belle
Okay grin grin

Enjoy cheesy

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 9:42am On Jul 16, 2019
abkrgumel:

Oya bring it to me now now b4 I coz trouble
I don give you already naa

Abi you get four pairs of bumbum? grin
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by 3rdavefarms(m): 9:42am On Jul 16, 2019
Asquare84:
Mine was last year , I went for a job interview and we agreed on annual take home pay of 1.8 million fast forward to when I went to pick my appointment letter I saw 1.2 million as annual pay after I point the discrepancy to the manager she now say I should take the appointment and letter the will increase the pay. Na so I take drop the appointment letter for the lady


They quickly remove 50 k sharply

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by BianoJay(m): 9:43am On Jul 16, 2019
pesinfada:
lol

But where dia client?
They were o...small small money dey enter. I stayed that long because I was learning stuff. That was even why I accepted the job at all...the place afforded me the opportunity to learn one or two things.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Nobody: 9:43am On Jul 16, 2019
[quote author=Ikville post=80310809][/quote]The job was secured and the salary was OK by me.The other one was not that secured that was why I went for it.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by alphaNomega: 9:45am On Jul 16, 2019
fkj950ax:


That's how it all starts. Before the story changes. Job opportunities in ME countries requires you, your lawyer and the police to be involved with the application.

Police from which of the countries?

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