₦airaland Forum

AreaFada2:
Women mostly see what they want to see. In any case having boyfriends outside while married is now common. So they are just covering up their game with "the guy is insecure" yarn.

I wonder how his "insecurity" turned her into a poor mother to her kids.

Don't mind these girls thinking with their itchy pussies.. Its the only term they can quickly throw at ur face when they're about to be found out.. Las las catch them on Friday night for club looking for free drinks, accommodation for the night and 20k. Their levels no pass like that my guy. Then one f00l go say he go house her because she's fine... No be die be that one

Are you sure you are a man? How old are you? This is INSECURITY. Rid yourself of it.

so been sexy after marriage is all you saw from his complain?
the part he wrote about the wife flirting with a guy on instgram you no see am
the part of her not having time for the kids but hanging out you no see am

sinaj:
Lwkmd

Isnt this what some men are praying for? To get a wife that will remain sexy and goodlooking after child birth.
If it was the opposite you would have still opened a thread too.
One man meat is another's poison sha

Oga work on your insecurities jore or better still wait till you catch her redhanded before you give yourself hbp.

Emperor4tune:
A suspecting game is only notice by a suspect,this dude is guilty he has eaten outside & now that karma wants to take revange on his wife he is shaking

very stupid something to say....if ur dat daft u should atleast remain mute so we dont notice it

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.

Didn't you see all these show off and lifestyle when you were dating?
Well if na me I would have dumped her ass a long time and get me a loyal girl.

Breaststroke:
OP,

I perfectly understand you and I don't think you're being insecure, my cousin and a childhood friend are the same way as your wife and it bothers me.

My childhood pal has always been a high flying, slay queen long before the term 'slay queen' hit us. Even her mother once said calm down, you want to walk before you crawl.

She's married now but there are rumours of her dating one of her organization's top clients.

Sorry I don't have any real advice other than to say, you're not insecure or crazy for wanting more and better from your spouse.

I just pity those inexperienced ones shouting insecure, low self esteem etc. Some would just come here to give advise they cant take in the name of being civil on faceless forum for that matter.

Op should just spy on her and send the idiot packing if found guilty.

No be you look hot chick? You no see homely chick when you dey look for wife?

When you were dating, did she not also have other toasters then?

Unless your wife was an ugly duckling ie she became hot after marriage, you knew exactly what you were getting into.

I honestly don't have any advice, because I don't know if you are paranoid or insecure or right

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

Spy on her. Track her phone calls messages etc You wont regret your actions.

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

You have to be a man! You must stamp your authority over her or continue to wail.

My advice for you is to give her ultimatum to adjust or ship out! 24hrs ultimatum is best!


BTW as for the chats, I blame you. You didn't stamp your authority from the onset and now it is biting you.

The solution? Regulate her social media activities or ban her completely from social media. If she refused, then Ship her out. Let her go before you die of HBP... After all, you already have kids!

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

I guess you're a quiet and indoor type, you cant cope with such Woman. There is a probability that she's cheating on you. When a Woman cares only about her looks and partying, you should know there is something or someone behind it.

My advice: Do whatever will give you peace, don't shorten your life span all in the name of marriage.

dairykidd:
Don't mind these girls thinking with their itchy pussies.. Its the only term they can quickly throw at ur face when they're about to be found out.. Las las catch them on Friday night for club looking for free drinks, accommodation for the night and 20k. Their levels no pass like that my guy. Then one f00l go say he go house her because she's fine... No be die be that one

Lol.

[s]

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

[/s]

Yuneehk:
There's a problem if you're hot, and another one if you're cold. For the former, jealousy, insecurities creep in which is totally fine after all no one likes to share. For the latter, complaints of poor looks(size, dressing, etc), comparison with what they see outside and lust for that which is seen outside. It's even evident on the thread from comments above say one man meat na another one poison. Las las, this thing called marriage ain't got a manual.
You saw the signs from the onset sef but chose to ignore. This one will likely not change so bear your cross.

This is not really about being hot dear..
She flirts and guys know that she is available, that is why they call her pet names like love, my love. There are elegant married women u can't even dare call such name because they will send fire to visit u. She has presented her self as ever ready seductive woman online and men are bidding for her.

She rarely takes care of her kids, she leaves them with her mom only to go partying. While partying, she dresses seductively. She is hardly around, she jumps from one place to another. All these are what the OP pointed out.

The world has gone crazy and we kind of praise stupidity like we praise bbn. There is difference between dressing well and wearing stuff to seduce other men. Ladies who are still looking for men, single or ashawos can dress like that. But for a married woman, dressing like that for events her husband is not even with her means she is calling for male attendants. I know her type.

I can't force anyone to change. I can't advice anyone to do same. She can't change. That is who she is. She falls in the class of our female celebrities. Some ladies are like that. Some men are like that too.

He should leave her to live her life. He should divorce her. I feel for the kids too. They will suffer more from this. From the OP accounts, the woman doesn't even have value for kids.

[color=#006600][/color]

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

my brother please for your own good don’t listen to whatever anybody here tells you majority of guys and ladies here are kids and don’t know what been married is all about not to talk of having two kids, I’ve been there done it and know how it feels having a flirtatious woman, listen it’s better to have a nagging woman than a flirtatious one because there’s a 100% chances that she’s cheating on you, the reason why we end up marrying the wrong person is because we neglect this little signs before getting married, don’t neglect this signs you are seeing some people here will tell you that you are been insecured or paranoid my dear you are not I can bet my last money that she’s planning on cheating on you or already doing that...birds of feathers they say flock together her friends are bad so is she I am sorry to say that because she’s your wife , you have two options it’s either you sit her down and talk to her and involve her parents if she doesn’t listen then file for a divorce

The disadvantage of marrying younger and inexperienced is that your wife had not fully experience the youthful side of her when she married you.
The teenage experience of self conscious around the other opposite sex has just began to increase and her testosterone is high seeing younger woman around guys.
You have to prepare to upped your job in the room to satisfy her libido for now.
She will soon 'get-tired' if 'well-fired" !

Did the people calling OP insecure go through the opening post at all?

If all he stated there is the truth, then his concerns are valid. People should stop accusing their partners of insecurity, as a way of getting off with bad behaviour.

My guy, your wife has found out that you are weak, so she's taking advantage of the situation. How can u allow all that nonsense and you think things will be normal? You better wake up and take charge or soon you will become assistant husband to your wife.

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

is she a Libra?

truthsayer009:
OP, if i get married and have what you have right now I would totally be happy.

10 years of marriage and your wife still looks really good to 100% is rare. You need to ask God for forgiveness because you dont deserve what you have.

Even if your wife wants to play around or go back in shape, it should motivate you to join her in the Gym, get yourself in shape too. Go out with her to events, look like a power couple.

You guys always admire Beyonce when you see her. You think it was by Juju she maintained her figure after 2 kids, imagine if she was with Men like you?

What makes you think she doesnt want to take care of your children.

why don't you join her in looking good?

Since you're obviously young and unmarried, I don't expect you to understand.

People like you think if you marry a beautiful wife, you will be happy for the rest of your life. I can tell you categorically that humility, submission, being warm and hospitable trump beauty in making a marriage last.

No matter how beautiful your wife is, within a few years, you will get used to that beautiful face and figure and it won't move you much again. You get to see the personality deep inside and if that personality is disgusting, you are doomed.

LordKO:
@OP

It's obvious that you married another man's wife/the wrong woman. A true wife's invaluableness (to her husband, a sane husband of course) lies in the attributes of selflessness, meekness and sweetness - unfortunately she possesses only sweetness which isn't enough to guarantee you peace of mind. And a virtuous woman knows the difference between dressing classy and dressing slutty. So, I support your decision.

Ignore anyone who'll tell you that insecurity is worrying you.

Good!

He has to take drastic decision on the woman!

If it was those days when men were men, the woman would have relocated to her father's house. All these emotionally weak men that the society is breeding these days sef

ornicus:
No be you look hot chick? You no see homely chick when you dey look for wife?

When you were dating, did she not also have other toasters then?

Unless your wife was an ugly duckling ie she became hot after marriage, you knew exactly what you were getting into.

I honestly don't have any advice, because I don't know if you are paranoid or insecure or right

She wasn't an ugly duckling, read his post well- he said she has always been like that, but he ignored.

This is the same thing I commented on the other thread, if she keeps showing signs that she loves the fast life...pull the plug.

But do they hear? They think they can always use marriage to tame every womam. Shior!

Seriously speaking I really don't get why ppl act dis way,u saw d signs from the beginning yet you went ahead to marry her thinking she would change but instead of her changing she's getting worse by d day and d most annoying part is that she barely has time for d kids.i really don't know what you want us to do about it here o cos u actually so it coming.

[color=#006600][/color]

pocohantas:
Did the people calling OP insecure go theough the opening post at all?

If all he stated there is the truth, then his concerns are valid. People should stop accusing their partner's of insecurity, as a way of getting off with their bad behaviour.

dont mind then I have noticed that majority of people here are kids and don’t know what been married is all about he’s concerns are very valid she’s either cheating or planning to I have been in. Similar situation and when I complained I was tagged insecured and paranoid till she left me with two kids when she went for NYSC in another city

Reason why I ended a 3 year old relationship. ..almost 4 years seff....it's better to walk away now being hurt , I'll heal , at least we are not married !....women don't know what they want !

Bro....i am a married man. I dont give this chances. You neeed to stand your ground in your home. As much as a wife should be respected and cared for, your case is different. She has chosen a path of destruction. Be strong, take care of your kids. Call her, talk to her( dont shout at her oh, do it calmly), let her see reasons, if y0ur guts tells you she is cheating, be calm, be a husband in the house, tail her discreetlly, make sure yu catch her red handed.

Be smart n fast about it. A cheating woman is liable kill her husband.

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

Are you married?

Be careful,one of these Nairalanders could be banging ur wife and give ng u excuses not to stalk her, report her to her parents or let her go

Your case is indeed a pathetic one. No "responsibly' lady dresses slutty . Her negligence of her biological children is a clear indication that she consider them a setback to her newly found lifestyle. Brother, call her to other now before she begins to consider u too a setback. that will mean a premature death for u.

Do the needful(get her back on track or divorce) while you are still able.

It is great to look good, but anyone who places his/her look above every other thing possesses high sense of irresponsibility. This am sure u saw before the marriage but u were carried away with her look and the honeypot.

Now, what u turned blind eye to is right inside ur eyes and at a time its maturity has healed u like the blind bartimaeus .

Fix it now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What insecurities BS upon BS!!!

A married woman ought to dress and act like a married woman. A married woman should respect her husband and her marriage. I am of the school of thoughts that a married woman should NOT maintain close male friends. A married woman shouldn't go around exchanging phone numbers with any guys who ask for her number. If you're bored with your marriage then quit the marriage and go run the street


O pari

sinaj:
Lwkmd

Isnt this what some men are praying for? To get a wife that will remain sexy and goodlooking after child birth.
If it was the opposite you would have still opened a thread too.
One man meat is another's poison sha

Oga work on your insecurities jore or better still wait till you catch her redhanded before you give yourself hbp.

mysticgal:
You people love ladies who are “WELL” dressed.
“Ah baby your skirt should come up small na, you are not an old woman OR baby, wear bumshorts, I like it”

Please bro, manage her...God shall give you the grace

You this woman..you dey see Well .I

You are just a sick and insecure bastard.

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

Don't even bother explaining yourself, bro. Most of us know where you're coming from.

I mean, if you know you know!


O pari

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.