₦airaland Forum

Thank you! There's nothing more depressing than marrying a woman who doesn't respect her marriage and/or her husband. I don't care how "boring" your husband is. If you're too bored with your husband then quit the marriage and go do your thing. To stay in the marriage while fooling around with other men is extremely disrespectful.


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
Gbam!

The OP married a slayqueen and he is paying the price.

He cannot say he didn't see these signs from dating stage, neither will he say she suddenly changed to this.

She has zero regard for him.neither does she has atom of virtue in her.

He either divorces her or die in silence

Marriage has stopped being for better for good since two millennium ago. If you have needs, talk to your partner. If you're not happy, consider resolving issues or walking away. Its more respectful than making the other party look the fool in the union.

Bros, when slutty behaviour is engrained in some people's DNA, there is nothing you can do to curb their excesses.

Some of these modern women never graduate from their default ashawo behaviour, suggesting they are not prepared for marriage. What you can do: take the reins and manage your home with dictatorial strictness (don't beat her). All these gentle approach no dey help when sluttiness build mansion for her skull. If temporary separation would help her graduate from ashawo dressing and ashawo friends, do it. If she comes from a responsible home, her parents would deal with her before she disgraces them.

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

How about him dying of HIV?

@OP hear me and hear me well.
Seize that phone,
review the contents with her
call for a family meeting
Air your thoughts
Listen to hers
Both of you should decide once and for all if you want to remain as man and wife or not.
Do the right thing, not this SM bullshit.

TonyeBarcanista:
You must have unrestricted access to her phone FROM the first day of dating... Don't wait till marriage

Sure. In my serious relationships, that is what i do.

Hindsight, they say, is 20-20.

Sometimes you don't see these things clearly until after you've taken the plunge. People change … people become worse and more flirty


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
Gbam!

The OP married a slayqueen and he is paying the price.

He cannot say he didn't see these signs from dating stage, neither will he say she suddenly changed to this.

She has zero regard for him.neither does she has atom of virtue in her.

He either divorces her or die in silence

Kokoebapluse:
Are you also à good husband ? And sure you are a good husband ? Then you should not fear, bec ause she know if she lose you to another women she Will regret it, Do you have good looking ? You too start and dress up, roll your life leave her alone dont talk to her about her dressing about her social life, you too start to dress like correct Guy man with enogh efizi you know alway smell good before You leave House and always ask her How you look like before you leave House even if she dont talk just smile and walk away, and alway keep quite about and behave like man when you return back home, dont talk too much and dont eat too much and dont sleep too much always press your phone in her present, trust me she Will start to confuse about What is goin on. You know What women brain always think about negative than positive, she Will start to think négative about your movement, and she Will always get jealous and agressive, once you notice that just have time to have talk with her and calm her down, you know What women hate ? Women dont like thire husband to dress too atcrative to other women, but always dress like u never Marry and look Good always, i tell u she Will nearly have bp, but make sure you are a resonsible man ooo, if you are not responsable she wont care How you look like, but as for me i dont care Who my wife friand is How she dress, but What am sure about is if she lose me she May not get someone to replace me back. And if my wife always' ignore my talk ï Will abandon her, let her live her life make i leave mine. Or we just seperate simple

All these for a married man of ten years just because his wife is becoming something else! U don kill person

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.

This is a red flag

DaddyMorenike:
Abeg no tell anybody?!!!

I won't

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

Her attending parties 24/7 is already affecting her time with the kids. That's a more serious issue

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.

There is an ashewo thread on NL, go there an d post your wife's contact and they will take over. Shebi you wanted her out of your house? I am here to help

https://www.nairaland.com/4957496/ashewo-beer-parlour-share-ashewo/1758

Hindsight, they say, is 20-20.

Sometimes you don't see these things clearly until after you've taken the plunge. People change … people become worse (or shall we say 'more flirty') over time


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
Gbam!

The OP married a slayqueen and he is paying the price.

He cannot say he didn't see these signs from dating stage, neither will he say she suddenly changed to this.

She has zero regard for him.neither does she has atom of virtue in her.

He either divorces her or die in silence

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

No vex bro..is she from owerri?

lilbest4:
log in her Instagram and Facebook on your phone it is very easy, I can teach you if you want and if you have iPhone, login her WhatsApp on your safari browser

Your plan is to end this marriage abi?

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

If you for any reason suspect that your wife is cheating... Then I bet you, you are 80% correct

You know her more than we all do, you know her better...


Keep track on her, be calm and make sure you get enough proves

I know this kind of feelings, it just dont come! Unless something fishy is going on...


I can give you some little help... If you want.....

I hate cheating!

Especially when it comes to someone who is very much committed and responsible

Women and wahala..... Just take it easy man, u sef cheat so you can rest...

Icon79:
Thank you! There's nothing more depressing than marrying a woman who doesn't respect her marriage and/or her husband. I don't care how "boring" your husband is. If you're too bored with your husband then quit the marriage and go do your thing. To stay in the marriage while fooling around with other men is extremely disrespectful.


O pari

It is more depressing seeing weak men complain on social media and internet forums instead of taking action

Codo22:
very stupid something to say....if ur dat daft u should atleast remain mute so we dont notice it

dude ignouring would have saved ur pains,dis reveal ur brain state is still premature

sanusi44z:
I am not married but i can relate with you.

Do you have access to her phone? As a married couple, you need to have access to each other's phone or you have to have access to her phone. That is the first thing i will do when i get married. She should not be hiding anything from you.

You are the husband, you have to have a say on your wife.

Your wife is a slay queen as they said, party type, over fashionable, want to compete with friends, want to have likes on instagram, want men attention. Let me tell you, even if she is a faithful and honest one with pure intention, one day or some time, she wouldn't know when she will fall to someone or more, she will cheat. I have been there before.

I'm afraid you're not equipped to understand the relationship between married people since you're not married yet.
Every Men has a Private, Public and Secret Life, I must confessed. It is how you defend each life that matters...
Suggesting that couple should have access to each phone is quite unnecessary and an affront to inviting unnecessary stress.
For example, many women rejected the advances from friends and neighbours without the need to inform the husband for obvious reasons.
Having access to her phone anytime may bring jealousy, envy and suspicion which is quite dangerous and unhealthy to good relationship.
Some men too have some women they relate with regularly without having affairs, yet the wife will never allows such relationship.
No matter what, some people are not bound to be together and you can't explain that for different reasons. !

OP.....pls get her pregnant again for the third child...and everything will fall in place.

Thank me later

Icon79:
Hindsight, they say, is 20-20.

Sometimes you don't see these things clearly until after you've taken the plunge. People change … people become worse and more flirty


O pari

He can't say he didn't see the signs... NEVER

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

This your comment shows you Know NOTHING about marriage!!!

Just look at this trashy talk from so called "intellectual". Chai

Yuneehk:
There's a problem if you're hot, and another one if you're cold. For the former, jealousy, insecurities creep in which is totally fine after all no one likes to share. For the latter, complaints of poor looks(size, dressing, etc), comparison with what they see outside and lust for that which is seen outside. It's even evident on the thread from comments above say one man meat na another one poison. Las las, this thing called marriage ain't got a manual.
You saw the signs from the onset sef but chose to ignore. This one will likely not change so bear your cross.

if you know, a married woman don't need to be hot or cold, what so ever.... her way of fashion and relating to ppl shld totally base on how her husband want it

maasoap:
All these for a married man of ten years just because his wife is becoming something else! U don kill person

10 years is a small years nah, to be honest if you have husband quality and you like to dress up your wife will always monitor u because she wont want to lose u.

[s]

TempleHouse:
I'm afraid you're not equipped to understand the relationship between married people since you're not married yet.
Every Men has a Private, Public and Secret Life, I must confessed. It is how you defend each life that matters...
Suggesting that couple should have access to each phone is quite unnecessary and an affront to inviting unnecessary stress.
For example, many women rejected the advances from friends and neighbours without the need to inform the husband for obvious reasons.
Having access to her phone anytime may bring jealousy, envy and suspicion which is quite dangerous and unhealthy to good relationship.
Some men too have some women they relate with regularly without having affairs, yet the wife will never allows such relationship.

[/s]

He sure did. But sometimes you don't see clearly when you're in "love". That's why they say that love is blind


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
He can't say he didn't see the signs... NEVER

You and your wife are not social mates ! She is by far your senior in that aspect and she is not ready to stoop so low to your level any time soon.

I sincerely hope you're not on "one chance" already ! Good luck man.

lilbest4:
log in her Instagram and Facebook on your phone it is very easy, I can teach you if you want and if you have iPhone, login her WhatsApp on your safari browser

Oga I wan learn oooò, Wives these days wan give man HBP... epp us

GrabHisBalls:
Your plan is to end this marriage abi?

The marriage is already dead

My brother abeg track her phone or kindly install some phone call recorder on her phone, free her during this seasons and you will shock . I have done it several olosho trying to reap me because of love. She is cheating and you need evidence so as to free your mind. A cheating wife or girlfriend can kill. ........abeg track her or install phone call recorder,, you will thank me later ... may I go carry my pikin from school

You're apparently not married, bro. You might think you can handle all these things until you get yourself entangled in one.

Meanwhile, I think he's handling it in his own way. He's just looking for a good advice before he does something drastic … however, I agree that the social media is probably not the best avenue to handle the situation. When it comes to marital issue(s), I am a big believer that the two people involved are "best" situated to finding a lasting solution to the problem(s).


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
It is more depressing seeing weak men complain on social media and internet forums instead of taking action

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.

My brother, honestly some people are just so senseless in this world. Bear with them. I'm pained for you for bringing this kind of painful situation on a forum like this that is rife with juveniles with zero experience about how life works. At best, what you will get are nothing but uninformed, inexperienced and distorted advice and suggestions from single folks that can't tell their right from left.
Pls bro, for your mental health sake.. Tell her in strong terms that you plan to separate from her if she doesn't change. And follow thru with your word.
As for now, just rest assured that she might likely not change since she believes she has tasted the elixir..hence there is no going back.
Brace up for any eventuality in the coming days as they may be very unpleasant for you. But at the end of the day you have to choose between two pains: the temporal pain of break up OR the perpetual pain of being reduced to nothing by the supposed love of your life. Peace sir.