₦airaland Forum

ruffkenny:
Trust me everyone u meet will cause you drama at one point or the other,if you don't want drama then u don't need any woman,for as long as you will be with a woman,there must be drama,just make sure the person you are fighting for is worth it..Based on the little info he gave,I think his woman is stingy,an Introvert, bitter, self conservative, unforgivable and moody,it is not the end of the end,it could be worked on,there will be no light if there was no darkness..so he need to stop complaining,man up and work on his woman,not to end it bro,is he gonna be ending it with every wife just because she got an attitude?He did not notice this attitude before introduction?Now she is his wife and he wants to back out,for me is cowardice..

Of course relationship is about 2 different people trying to blend together, as expected there must be some dramas but the basis should never be compromise. How can you work on someone that is unwilling to change her attitudes? Attitude is everything. There is no cowardice in quitting! Ability to quit toxic relationship is the beginning of widsom...

ranmoor:
Of course relationship is about 2 different people trying to blend together, as expected there must be some dramas but the basis should never be compromise. How can you work on someone that is unwilling to change her attitudes? Attitude is everything. There is no cowardice in quitting! Ability to quit toxic relationship is the beginning of widsom...

There are two sides to every coin,this is his own part of the story,There is no way I can be showing you love on and on and you will show me hate on and on,at a time,u will get tired and start to love me, forgiveness more forgiveness, corrections more corrections..a toxic man will attract a toxic woman,cos likes attract, instead of focusing on women,focus on yourself to be better and all her toxic nature will gradually drop..if she is toxic,how are you responding, this is the most important..

ruffkenny:
There are two sides to every coin,this is his own part of the story,There is no way I can be showing you love on and on and you will show me hate on and on,at a time,u will get tired and start to love me, forgiveness more forgiveness, corrections more corrections..a toxic man will attract a toxic woman,cos likes attract, instead of focusing on women,focus on yourself to be better and all her toxic nature will gradually drop..if she is toxic,how are you responding, this is the most important..

Thank you man. i quite appreciate your constructive comments. I have been so considerate to the best of my ability. Of course I can't bring all my family issues here on NL to make you see what issues I've waived and forgone, but bringing this means it has come to a frustrating level. I've done so much and sacrifice so much to make sure we both live happily as one, several talking, several communications, several love and romance attempts, all turned down. Mind you, up there I said what pains me most was that posted, during this period she also changed Access to her phone but I wasn't even moved with that.

ruffkenny:
Be patient with her,that is because you guys have not properly married,maybe she is keeping her things well incase you do what you wrote up there!!Besides what have u been telling her that makes her pack her things like that,maybe you have been telling her u will send her out of your house,hence she is not feeling that your home has totally become hers,..The home of a man belong to his wife,its hers not just yours,now you are talking of ejecting your wife??Bro are you sure you are ready to settle down with her?If yes then there is nothing love and communication cannot solve..

ds d issue I have with ladies....u are advising d Guy to be Patience and not condemning the lady behaviour.
Is like u ladies are just wired never to speak the truth to each other.... d guy sud always be one to be Patience while d lady misbehave.
am very sure if it was the other way round u will say d guy isn't matured bla bla but i guess a lady is permitted to be immature.
why will I have a issh with my fiancée and d next thing she does is ignore me and pack all her stuff off so I can't use do u no wat D's really means.
Bro if u marry dat babe .... anytime u have issh she won't cook for you...she will watch go hungry.
ds how it start.

ruffkenny:
There are two sides to every coin,this is his own part of the story,There is no way I can be showing you love on and on and you will show me hate on and on,at a time,u will get tired and start to love me, forgiveness more forgiveness, corrections more corrections..a toxic man will attract a toxic woman,cos likes attract, instead of focusing on women,focus on yourself to be better and all her toxic nature will gradually drop..if she is toxic,how are you responding, this is the most important..

ds doesn't make sense to me***a toxic man attract toxic woman*** like are u so ignorant to d fact people change.
u can be a dove and marry a dove ....few years on d dove can turn to be a loin.

okorotalkative:
Hehe she's a keeper.

Indeed... What kinda keeper withhold things from her partner? Still had the temerity to use His when he replaces them? That's wickedness!!
Let's call a spade a spade.. If you don't like what your partner did, kindly trash it out like the adults that you are and not keep malice like babies

Op, call her to order and let her know how you feel about those things she does that usually piss you off.. Social media should be the last place you should turn to, if you have tried every possible means to see that things works out between you both and it didn't.

If you genuinely love her, have a heart to heart talk with her... I believe you will see changes afterwards but if after everything no changes suffice.. Kindly let go for your peace of mind.

No one deserves a toxic partner/relationship... Happiness is the keyword!!

nnamdiokoro:
Thank you man. i quite appreciate your constructive comments. I have been so considerate to the best of my ability. Of course I can't bring all my family issues here on NL to make you see what issues I've waived and forgone, but bringing this means it has come to a frustrating level. I've done so much and sacrifice so much to make sure we both live happily as one, several talking, several communications, several love and romance attempts, all turned down. Mind you, up there I said what pains me most was that posted, during this period she also changed Access to her phone but I wasn't even moved with that.

Sorry man,I did not see that last part,but if she changed access to her phone that means she is standing with one leg in your house and the other leg is somewhere else,so do the needful and let her leave,she is probably seeing someone else with that phone stuff,no need of wasting your time housing her since you have not paid her bride prize,tell her pump and clear that you want you guys to end your relationship based on her actions,let her know you are not happy in the relationship,if you mean something to her,she wouldn't wanna leave but fight to make ammends,just tell her you want you guys to break up simple..

Godoverevery:
ds doesn't make sense to me***a toxic man attract toxic woman*** like are u so ignorant to d fact people change.
u can be a dove and marry a dove ....few years on d dove can turn to be a loin.

it all depends on how you handle the dove,a dove is gentle,loving and kind,a lion is strong,bold and fierce,if you handle a dove gently it will remains a dove,if you handle it fiercely it turns to even a dog.. so you are equally responsible for what the woman in your life turns out to become,instead of putting all the blames on your woman,the question is what have you done?what did u do to change things?

ruffkenny:
it all depends on how you handle the dove,a dove is gentle,loving and kind,a lion is strong,bold and fierce,if you handle a dove gently it will remains a dove,if you handle it fiercely it turns to even a dog.. so you are equally responsible for what the woman in your life turns out to become,instead of putting all the blames on your woman,the question is what have you done?what did u do to change things?

So whatever she turn out to be am responsible and whatever I turn out to be
so does men that there wife turned out to be killers dey are responsible....do u no wat u saying at all.
Not surprised women will always play victim in every situation.
lol am responsible for how an adult turn out to be .....what a joke

Godoverevery:
ds d issue I have with ladies....u are advising d Guy to be Patience and not condemning the lady behaviour.
Is like u ladies are just wired never to speak the truth to each other.... d guy sud always be one to be Patience while d lady misbehave.
am very sure if it was the other way round u will say d guy isn't matured bla bla but i guess a lady is permitted to be immature.
why will I have a issh with my fiancée and d next thing she does is ignore me and pack all her stuff off so I can't use do u no wat D's really means.
Bro if u marry dat babe .... anytime u have issh she won't cook for you...she will watch go hungry.
ds how it start.

please am not a lady ooo,the lady is still childish as you can see,that is why we date girls younger than us so we could always teach them and correct them..but you have a point..

Godoverevery:
So whatever she turn out to be am responsible and whatever I turn out to be
so does men that there wife turned out to be killers dey are responsible....do u no wat u saying at all.
Not surprised women will always play victim in every situation.
lol am responsible for how an adult turn out to be .....what a joke

Bro whether you like it or not,the glory of the wife is to the husband and her unclothedness is to his shame..in the community where I come from,when we see a well behaved woman,we always ask,who is her husband,and when we see a bad woman too we ask the same question because as a man,you are the head of your home,you are to be blamed if things are not right and to be honoured if things are right not the woman..there is a reason men are the head,they are there to take the lead,protect and shield the women,if the woman in your life is having these issues,u got to take a look at yourself first and change things the way they ought to be...

nnamdiokoro:
So I have been in relationship with this lady for over a year now and we've been living together as couple, though we only did Introduction but our parents both approved we can live together due to the proximity to her work place.

Now the issue am having is that she over reacts whenever she's angered or we have issues. She puts up different attitudes like not talking to me, keeping boundaries and some other ones. But the one that kept me doubting proceeding with the relationship is that she avoids me in all possible manner. This includes packing everything she buys into the house so I don't get to have access to it, things like toiletries,perfume, and some other other items she know I might have access to. I watched her do all those without any reaction while replacing all she kept away from me even though she now resorts to using them and keeping hers away. This has happened a couple of time but I tend to ignore it calling it the woman way and it's really a piss off

Now I intend to eject her from my house and I just want to be sure I am threading on the right path and what is the possible way to eject her?

............you only did introduction and your alreast living together as "couple"...thats the priblem right there ....yiur relationship is already built on a faulty and very defective foundation and hence cannot stand. It's not about the girl , it's about the both of you ...retrace your steps and do things the right way and it will be fine.

ruffkenny:
Be patient with her,that is because you guys have not properly married,maybe she is keeping her things well incase you do what you wrote up there!!Besides what have u been telling her that makes her pack her things like that,maybe you have been telling her u will send her out of your house,hence she is not feeling that your home has totally become hers,..The home of a man belong to his wife,its hers not just yours,now you are talking of ejecting your wife??Bro are you sure you are ready to settle down with her?If yes then there is nothing love and communication cannot solve..

I am very sure that you are a woman

nnamdiokoro:
Lol... You're funny. How much is toiletries that I can't buy? More so was it only toiletries you saw up there? Even the ones she bought was part of the money I gave her for upkeep.

As for your second paragraph we had a little disagreement borne out sex conversation.

I wan enter d place, she said I only kept her as a sex machine and don't want to marry her proper. D tin weak my body but I kept calm, hoping she'll apologise but she never did. The following morning I woke her up and inform her I was going to work, till I got to work, she never called and even when I do call her, she was reluctantly talking. Now she doesn't even cook. Her daily routine is just go to work and come back home to sleep

I've been following up till this your comment. How old is she? I think it's immaturity on her part. You will have to be patient if you're really into her and want it to work. There are many things that can make a fiancee live with the fiance even when they're not married. When our house got completely razed down on a certain December 26, I had to move in with my fiance now husband. It's an opportunity to test the waters whether it will be palatable.
So it's not strange that she's living with you for now.

Now, you need to communicate with her. You need to reiterate the fact that it's childish and disgusting for her to be setting things aside in the house. You're supposed to be one. In marriage, you are one.

Why are you delaying putting a ring on it? Naturally, a woman will feel used, keeping her in the house, doing wifely duties when she's not really a wife. If you have genuine reasons why you've not made it official, intimate her in details of your plans so the two of you can be in synch.

Many Nairalanders are immature in the way they reason. They're quick to say Crucify! Crucify! Beware of such. You're the one walking in those shoes and you'll be the only one hit when the cookie crumbles. Have a discerning brain.

nnamdiokoro:
Thank you man. i quite appreciate your constructive comments. I have been so considerate to the best of my ability. Of course I can't bring all my family issues here on NL to make you see what issues I've waived and forgone, but bringing this means it has come to a frustrating level. I've done so much and sacrifice so much to make sure we both live happily as one, several talking, several communications, several love and romance attempts, all turned down. Mind you, up there I said what pains me most was that posted, during this period she also changed Access to her phone but I wasn't even moved with that.

Hilarious!

And you still don't know where the problem is?

Permit me to tell you sir_ You are a weak man!. Your woman has lost all regards and respect she once had for you; that is the reason she is misbehaving.

There is also a High Possibility that she is in another physical or emotional relationship with someone else, hence, the emboldened. You can only know this when you have access to her phone. I can't be in any relationship that I won't have unrestricted access to my woman's phone.

The solution? Man Up!

Badbunny:
With Ctrl + E

Ctrl + E is for centralizing Items. The right command is Alt + F4

TonyeBarcanista:
I am very sure that you are a woman

hmmm what has been a man or a woman got to do with the subject at hand,I still repeat I am a man and I know the struggle that comes with a woman in a relationship,that advice I gave was practically what I have experienced,the problem with we
Nigerians is not just the female folks,we feel comfortable to mistreat them and abuse them then expect something different,it doesn't work that way for what you give is what you receive,and bro I am entitled to my opinion,all u should do is respect it, accept it or reject it, whichever way,the guys woman is not the worst of Nigerian women, Remember women always seek attention,he can teach her how to be mature gradually,this is not an automatic process,it takes a while but if anyone is seeking for an already made woman,he is making a mistake..who says people can't change?change is the only thing that will remain constant..

You speak (comment) like a woman.

[s]

ruffkenny:
hmmm what has been a man or a woman got to do with the subject at hand,I still repeat I am a man with a wife and 2 kids so I know what been married for years means and the struggle that comes with a woman in a marriage,that advice I gave was practically what I have experienced and today I have no regrets cos my wife remain the most beautiful soul to me,the problem with we
Nigerians is not just the female folks,we feel comfortable to mistreat them and abuse them then expect something different,it doesn't work that way for what you give is what you receive,and bro I am entitled to my opinion,all u should do is respect it, accept it or reject it, whichever way,the guys woman is not the worst of Nigerian women, Remember women always seek attention,he can teach her how to be mature gradually,this is not an automatic process,it takes a while but if anyone is seeking for an already made woman,he is making a mistake..who says people can't change?change is the only thing that will remain constant..

[/s]

So you want to be fvcking her when you know you have no intentions of marrying her.

Let me tell you, you don't love that lady and are just giving silly excuses.
Send her packing fast so she can replace your ass!

nnamdiokoro:
Lol... You're funny. How much is toiletries that I can't buy? More so was it only toiletries you saw up there? Even the ones she bought was part of the money I gave her for upkeep.

As for your second paragraph we had a little disagreement borne out sex conversation.

I wan enter d place, she said I only kept her as a sex machine and don't want to marry her proper. D tin weak my body but I kept calm, hoping she'll apologise but she never did. The following morning I woke her up and inform her I was going to work, till I got to work, she never called and even when I do call her, she was reluctantly talking. Now she doesn't even cook. Her daily routine is just go to work and come back home to sleep

You speak (comment) like a woman



@Tonye,That is your opinion,you have the right to think what u want with your mind

If she can live in your house and not allow you to use her things and it means she can't use your house . She should go and rent her own house

Baba Why your girl dey stingy like tortoise joke apart well sit her down follow her yarn na your babe after all if she want you guys together she will change.

nnamdiokoro:
Lol... You're funny. How much is toiletries that I can't buy? More so was it only toiletries you saw up there? Even the ones she bought was part of the money I gave her for upkeep.

As for your second paragraph we had a little disagreement borne out sex conversation.

I wan enter d place, she said I only kept her as a sex machine and don't want to marry her proper. D tin weak my body but I kept calm, hoping she'll apologise but she never did. The following morning I woke her up and inform her I was going to work, till I got to work, she never called and even when I do call her, she was reluctantly talking. Now she doesn't even cook. Her daily routine is just go to work and come back home to sleep

I really commend her for locking up. I mean... Any responsible lady will feel used and want to lock up. Yes!

When are you going to go and marry her properly? Is it when she starts growiing grey? She not acting out of place if you ask me. She even raised a valid point, which is, you're using her as a sex machine. If you want to continue gaining access to the Paradise, and enjoy her cooking then go and do the needful and start enjoying the full package. Men who are doing it are not fools. I dont know how you find it easy to be chopping for free without feeling the need to go and do the right thing.
Now after chopping free something, you want to discard her. Hmm...

nnamdiokoro:
So I have been in relationship with this lady for over a year now and we've been living together as couple, though we only did Introduction but our parents both approved we can live together due to the proximity to her work place.

Now the issue am having is that she over reacts whenever she's angered or we have issues. She puts up different attitudes like not talking to me, keeping boundaries and some other ones. But the one that kept me doubting proceeding with the relationship is that she avoids me in all possible manner. This includes packing everything she buys into the house so I don't get to have access to it, things like toiletries,perfume, and some other other items she know I might have access to. I watched her do all those without any reaction while replacing all she kept away from me even though she now resorts to using them and keeping hers away. This has happened a couple of time but I tend to ignore it calling it the woman way and it's really a piss off

Now I intend to eject her from my house and I just want to be sure I am threading on the right path and what is the possible way to eject her?

Lol. Once you enter the marriage proper, make sure everything you buy bears ur name, even the one's you gift her. Problems will definitely arise in every marriage. Never resort to malice nor involving 3rd parties to settle issues in a marriage. It does more damage than good. Just be prepared for eventualities that may include her leaving with all your sweat while your union was contracted. My advice, look properly b4 you leap

AshiraWealthy:
I really commend her for locking up. I mean... Any responsible lady will feel used and want to lock up. Yes!

When are you going to go and marry her properly? Is it when she starts growiing grey? She not acting out of place if you ask me. She even raised a valid point, which is, you're using her as a sex machine. If you want to continue gaining access to the Paradise, and enjoy her cooking then go and do the needful and start enjoying the full package. Men who are doing it are not fools. I dont know how you find it easy to be chopping for free without feeling the need to go and do the right thing.
Now after chopping free something, you want to discard her. Hmm...

Where is the free coming from? Did you read the initial lines at all?

More so marrying her shouldn't be manipulative as you sound. If she decides to hold on to her paradise, that wouldn't hurriedly make me rush things up. Were talking of red flags here, you're talking of sex. But she can all the while collect my own money abii?

nnamdiokoro:
Where is the free coming from? Did you read the initial lines at all?

More so marrying her shouldn't be manipulative as you sound. If she decides to hold on to her paradise, that wouldn't hurriedly make me rush things up. Were talking of red flags here, you're talking of sex. But she can all the while collect my own money abii?

Bro,what we can all do is to suggest but you are the one to make the decision here,if you feel you are fed up with her,u really don't need anyone's help to eject her,but if you feel she is still worth it then fight for your relationship,non of these dudes advicing u to leave her will be there if tomorrow u loose the good thing u have built with her,think of her good qualities too while u punder on letting her go,you can't get all free asses unless you subscribe properly, She is not yet your wife to fully perform all wifely duties to you,plus sharing all with you,I understand your woman..the reasons you gave are not enough to end a relationship, this is sth she developed which u can stand by her to help her unlearn them once again..