₦airaland Forum

This story happened yesterday and it's about touching oga's wife's ass, honesty, and cheating. No, not the type of cheating you're thinking.

Honesty can't be bought. Some people naturally have it, some people are trying to have it, while some people don't have it and never will.

I like buying everything in pairs and that's why one of my favorite songs is "Everything na double double."

On the 3rd week of January, 2020, I went to a shop with a friend to purchase the tallest foam there. I saw a 24 inches foam and asked, "Madam, how much is this?"

"Fifty eight thousand Naira," she replied. "Can I get it for 50k?" I asked and immediately, my friend, let's call him Henry, shouted, "What? That is too much."

The woman smiled at our disagreement. "Please, give it to us for 40k," Henry begged. "No, 24 inches is not 40k — this one inside, 20 inches, is 40k."

After analyzing things, we told her we'll come back next week.

Some days later, being yesterday, I went back there alone and started pricing the 24 inches foam for 40k, but she refused.

She is an Igbo woman and I know she'll naturally have a crazy marketing skill to convince a buyer even if she'll lie to make it happen.

I stayed on that 40k and refused to let go. The moment she noticed I wouldn't back down, she told me a story that someone just bought the other 24 inches inside the shop today and she gave it to him for 47k after much begging.

Okay, I'll help you for 45k. Since she told me a story of someone who just bought the green color of that foam 47k today, I felt paying her the 45k has saved me 2k.

I felt good for saving myself 2k. Tip: Storytelling is the best persuasion on earth. Learn how to tell stories.

I need four original pillows. "Two thousand Naira each," she said, but I bargained for 1500 each at last. I bought bed sheet, etc.

"Do you use bank transfer?" I asked. "Yes, I do," she replied. As we were talking, a young man who looked stranded, but knows the woman came and said, "Madam madam, you don forget me o! Abeg, help me 70 bucks make I use as transport go see so-so and so..."

"Seventy Naira? If I get seventy Naira I go dey here?" she said.

They cracked some jokes and playfully bantered at each other. She told him to hold one side of the bed sheet she was trying to expand for me to see how long it is.

His hand accidentally brushed on her ass and he yelled, "Hmm! This one wey my hand wan put me for trouble make oga no come here come see wetin happen — I go end up for jail."

I smiled at the funny stament and the young man looked at me and said, "Chairman, na you get this big foam? You do well. Your woman go enjoy am. How I wish say I don blow like you. Blessing no wan come my way," he playfully teased me and I laughed and said, "Blessings will surely locate you." "Amen!" he proclaimed.

It's hard for someone to genuinely ask me for money offline and I won't give. If it's a woman trying to manipulate and extort me offline, then I don't give. If it's online, I also don't give. Those are my principles.

Any man or woman who uses the Internet regularly, but only ends up begging for money instead of using it to make legit money by setting up an online business and be a boss, is a lazy somebody. Such a person doesn't need help — he or she has help already (the Internet) but doesn't want to make a good use of it.

So, the young man said, "Amen!" for telling him blessings will locate him and immediately said, "Oga, abeg, you fit help me with small change make I use as transport go handle one or two things?"

I told him there is no money, but let me check my wallet if I can see something. I opened it and the stack of 1k notes I withdrew some minutes ago as pocket money wanted to expose me, but luckily, I saw 100 Naira note.

Though, giving him 200 Naira was what I had in mind, but there was only 100 note, 500s, and 1ks. So, I gave the 100 to him and said, "I hope it's enough?"

Before he could reply, the woman playfully said, "Why e no go dey enough? Someone wey dey find 70 Naira now get extra 30 Naira on top."

The two of them laughed and he thanked me. He threw some jibes at the woman and when he was living, he thanked me again and again for the money.

Deep down, I said to myself, "Just 100 Naira and this guy is thanking me like this?"

I love people who appreciate and I love doing more for such a person. I wanted to give him 1k extra, but a spirit said, "Guy, no show yourself o! If this woman notice say you get this kind of free nature, she'll increase the price for you when next you come." Immediately, I killed the thought of giving him an extra 1k.

The moment he left, I requested for the account number again and the madam's boy brought out his phone and called it for me.

"Which bank?" I asked. "UBA," he replied. At the shop, a 20 inches foam was demarcating the madam from us, so the cute pink lips guy whispered to me, "How much did she sell the foam to you?"

"Forty five thousand Naira," I replied. "It's 40k — you've been cheated. Tell her to give you back 5k."

I analyzed what he said, felt cheated, but couldn't renegotiate because I had gone far. It's never too late to renegotiate, but I felt she's going to suspect someone gave me expo.

When I wanted to buy something else, the woman said it's 3k, but my guardian angel whispered from afar as he hides like some giving expo in an exam and said, "1,500 Naira."

Instantly, I told the woman I'll pay 1k, but she laughed and refused. Me too, I refused. Later, she said she'll help me with 2k, yet I refused and acted as if I have lost interest in buying it.

She saw my determined and rigid body language that I won't yield to what she's saying.

Finally, I said, "Okay, I'll give you 1500 each and I can't go beyond that." She agreed, but said I have cheated her and packaged the ones I liked.

I gave her some money in cash and finally transfered her the 50k and showed her my screen to see it was successful.

Sadly, UBA was having a network delay and she called her husband to inquire if the money has arrived, but no, it hasn't.

Ten minutes gone, yet it hasn't arrived. She told me to be patient and the moment the husband gets it, he will call her. I agreed and she went to her neighbor's shop to gist.

As she was there talking and smiling, one of her daughters ( who looked 8 ) walked in with a textbook and I called her to give it to me let me test her reading ability.

She handed the book to me and I pointed the word "school" and she got it. I pointed "dangerous," she got it.

Now I knew she can read, so I searched for hard words kids will struggle to pronounce and found "Infinitive." My price guardian angel sat opposite us and was watching us having fun with the book.

"Pronounce that," I said and she tried, but couldn't get it correctly. I showed her other words and she got them. I scored her excellent and set her free.

Immediately, I asked my price angel of his name and he said Emmanuel. I took his number and saved it, "Emmanuel, the Great."

One thing led to another, I started inquiring why he did what he did by exposing the madam.

"Whenever I cheat someone or I'm around when someone is being cheated, I don't sleep at night. My conscience will haunt me throughout. I'll be awake thinking. The only way for me to have peace of mind and sleep well at night is through honesty in the day."

"Wow!" I exclaimed as I secretly love him more than he knows just because I hardly see people like him in this country.

"When I tell you something, just believe it," he said. He shared a story of a man who came to buy a 24 inches foam yesterday and he told him the price is 40k, but the man thought he is lying and said, "Where is your madam?"

"She is not around," I replied. He left and came back today and met my madam. When I saw him today, I just acted as if I didn't know him.

He pointed the bed and my madam told him 60k and he was shocked and confused. They started negotiating for more than 20 minutes and he was finally made to pay 47k. The young man carried the foam for 47k, but if he had listened to me, he would've saved himself 7k.

I redigested this story Mr. Emmanuel, the Great told me again and said, "Wow!" for the second time. My admiration for this cute guy kept increasing each second.

Last week, I went to my Oga's glass/window shop and accidentally broke a glass on the floor. All the apprentices there said I should pick the glass and hide them so that oga will not know, but I told them I'll tell about it.

When he came back, I met him and said, "Sir, I'm sorry." "Sorry what?" he asked and I explained everything and he was angry, loud, and finally forgave me.

If I had hidden it and he found it himself, it would've been a bad encounter. My oga loves when you tell him 100% the truth and he will forgive you.

There was one day I was trying to help a man in this particular shop. He priced something and my oga gave him a high price as the last price.

I secretly found a way to whisper to the man that the price is too high, but guess what this man did?

He turned to my oga and said, "Sir, your boy said the price is too high, so reduce it for me, abeg."

My oga angrily looked at me with that eye that says, "I'm going to shoot you today." After this horrible incident, he sacked me.

Two weeks later, he called me back to resume work. That man was the worst person I have ever tried to help. Whenever people, especially young people like me come to this shop to buy something, I make sure they don't get cheated — it hurts me.

At this time, I can't explain how much I like this guy. He likes making gain, but he hates excess gain. Too much of everything is bad.

He continued the story...

My oga likes me a lot because anything I tell him, he knows it's the truth and I'll never compromise. I don't know my parents.

They died when I was 10 months old, so he is the one who took responsibilities of me from A—Z. He trained me in kindergarten, nursery, primary, secondary school, and in business. I don't have anything on earth except my honesty.

Damn, this was the time I started crying, but I had to trick my mind to withhold the tears.

He said, "I don't have anything on earth except honesty." Mehn! That line and not knowing his parents is too emotional. One of his toes looked deformed — probably cause by lack of breast milk when he was growing up.

I love everything about Emmanuel. From his head, smiles, face, to toes.

I pointed the 20 inches foam and asked him how much and he said it's 30k. His madam wanted to sell it to me for 40k last.

I looked at him and said, "When next I'm coming to this shop to buy something, I'll call you and you'll buy it on my half. If you're not around, I'm not buying,"

I opened my wallet and gave him some money to buy recharge card, but he wanted to reject it. Luckily, I made him take it.

The madam came back and told me the money has reflected. I packed my loads and off I went — I even forgot to take receipt.

If Emmanuel was a woman, I would've dedicated that foam to him and he would've been the first woman to sleep on it.

Sadly, he is a man. In fact, not just an ordinary man, but an honest great man APC would hate to join their party. Lai Mohammed will not even want to see him close to Aso Rock's fence let alone inside Aso Rock. Humans hate honest people unless there is a  benefit from the honesty.

Emmanuel, I'll never forget you. Not because you opened my eyes to how your madam cheated me, but because you're honest and you have a working conscience unlike most humans.

yanabasee:
Op, you just the describe Emmanuel like say you be gay.

HacheNoire :
This is a win for democracy.

A win for Nigeria

HacheNoire:
This is a win for democracy.

A win for Nigeria

uruba23:
Seems like bachelorhood offloading to me.....married Life uploading

iLegendd:
...

iLegendd:
Correct.

Tony142:
Sir, is DAT your car?

Pious101:
I read ur story with interest....may I know which of d online business u re referring to?

iLegendd:
Any man or woman who uses the Internet regularly, but only ends up begging for money instead of using it to make legit money by setting up an online business and be a boss, is a lazy somebody. Such a person doesn't need help — he or she has help already (the Internet) but doesn't want to make a good use of it.

Pious101:
this were ur words...so I just thought maybe u re into any of the online biz

iLegendd:
Yes, you're right. Sadly, I don't like talking about them on Nairaland that much because I'm already bleary of doing so.

Pious101:
May I contact u privately then?

iLegendd:
Exactly the main reason I was trying so hard to dodge the chat and redirect you to YouTube and Google.

I'm unreliable when it comes to private chat, so the best place is only Nairaland. I mean: asking your questions in one of my threads.

If it's something I can answer with simple replies, I will. If it requires a long epistle as reply, then Google and YouTube got you covered for free. They are more reliable than Nigerian police.

iLegendd:
I'm just like Emmanuel. I don't have anything in this life except honesty. This world is not my home nor my own. So, I own nothing.

iLegendd:
Who knows?

nnamdiosu:
Hello bro, I sent you a pm.

Pious101:
I know definitely there are tons of online biz out there but d gospel truth is leaning on an experienced shoulder makes one to run faster...thank u so much for ur time bro

yanabasee:
Op, you just the describe Emmanuel like say you be gay.

Alex96:
Emmanuel is a good guy oo but unfortunately he can't carry that attitude start him own business ooo. Because if you tell 9ja person the true price, they must still bargain oo. Meslf if I enter market and person tell me price na divide by 4 I dey do first.