jess2019:
I was going through something and noticed that my husband has paid for 6months gold subscription to tinder last month. We have a little baby. I have been thinking on how to confront him about this. I cant believe he would do something like this when I am struggling with sleepless night with a baby. I will confront him once I get enough evidence even though I won't be able to trust him ever again.
NB. We live outside Nigeria

Register a fake account or get someone you trust to do it for you, chat him up with sexy pictures, organize a meeting at a restaurant and catch him red-handed.

generationz:



Register a fake account or get someone you trust to do it for you, chat him up with sexy pictures, organize a meeting at a restaurant and catch him red-handed.

I went through his phone last night and noticed he fixed a date with a lady but the lady didn't turn up. He chatted that most people dont like dating black men that he is black. He was actually truthful in telling her everything about him, how long he is here, his occupation. But they didn't talk about whether he has children. Do I still have to chat him up with a fake account when I already have this evidence? I also have a copy of bank statements to tinder. I dont know if I could go through this tonight again as I couldn't sleep last night and I have a baby that depends on me.

jess2019:


I went through his phone last night and noticed he fixed a date with a lady but the lady didn't turn up. He chatted that most people dont like dating black men that he is black. He was actually truthful in telling her everything about him, how long he is here, his occupation. But they didn't talk about whether he has children. Do I still have to chat him up with a fake account when I already have this evidence? I also have a copy of bank statements to tinder. I don't know if I could go through this tonight again as I couldn't sleep last night and I have a baby that depends on me.

You may not need more evidence if you keep this one well.

Take screenshots of the chats, send them to your phone and delete the screenshots from his phone.

Please, don't let his actions bother you.

He might lie and he might confess and apologize when you confront him, whatever he does just have it in mind that this incident has put a crack in your marriage that can't be fixed by mere apologies.

I can't tell you to take revenge but I can tell you to love yourself and child because you have just one life to live and didn't come here to live it for any man especially a man who thinks marriage is a joke.

Please, don't let it trouble you. This too shall pass.

Take care, dear.

jess2019:


I went through his phone last night and noticed he fixed a date with a lady but the lady didn't turn up. He chatted that most people dont like dating black men that he is black. He was actually truthful in telling her everything about him, how long he is here, his occupation. But they didn't talk about whether he has children. Do I still have to chat him up with a fake account when I already have this evidence? I also have a copy of bank statements to tinder. I dont know if I could go through this tonight again as I couldn't sleep last night and I have a baby that depends on me.

Don’t be hasty to draw conclusions . Be careful how you go about it when you table the issue to him .

You know your husband better than us. If he isn’t the womanizing type , calmly discuss it with him . He might just feel he lacks attention from you with the baby on board and decides to make friends online . Contrary to what most people are saying , Tinder can be used for meeting people with no hidden agenda . Because some girls use tinder for marketing their wares doesn’t mean all girls there are for sex . Same as guys .

However if he is a womanizer , then you should know how to approach the matter .

how many times did you give him sex? how many times did you call him honey? how many times did you pray for him ? how many times did you pray for him to prosper, how many times did he meet food on the table when he comes back from work? how many times do you call him and ask about his whereabouts?

but now that he has gotten a substitution for you, you are now on NAIRALAND, you pursued him to the streets by yourself, and hungry lions out there have snatched him, you better think about how to get him back, get a family member who can talk to his senses or father or uncle or mother or someone he listens to that he should show you attention like you had before,

as for me I don't blame the guy, plenty sweet Toto dey for fuxking outside if one woman dey deny me!!!! body no be firewood.

advice: woman stop being sober, stand up and do something, I am sure its either your action or inaction that drove him to TINDER!!!!

blaise26abj:


Don’t be hasty to draw conclusions . Be careful how you go about it when you table the issue to him .

You know your husband better than us. If he isn’t the womanizing type , calmly discuss it with him . He might just feel he lacks attention from you with the baby on board and decides to make friends online . Contrary to what most people are saying , Tinder can be used for meeting people with no hidden agenda . Because some girls use tinder for marketing their wares doesn’t mean all girls there are for sex . Same as guys .

However if he is a womanizer , then you should know how to approach the matter .

I wonder the kind of friendship a married man is looking for on tinder? what happens to communicating with me like an adult or atleast be helping with a baby.... in that way all three of us will be bonding. With this behaviour is he looking for a way to break his marriage ? I still dont understand the reason behind it

Join Tinder discreetly and DM him. "To catch a thief, act like a thief."

Uisce:
A married man has no business being on Tinder. Shameful.



It's a dating site/app with the reputation of being a "hookup" app, designed to facilitate sexual encounters.

are you married?

jess2019:


I wonder the kind of friendship a married man is looking for on tinder? what happens to communicating with me like an adult or atleast be helping with a baby.... in that way all three of us will be bonding. With this behaviour is he looking for a way to break his marriage ? I still dont understand the reason behind it

Married people shouldn't be on any social platform. What's the difference? Same pictures, bio as well as direct messaging.

ThundrCork:
are you married?

Yes

And no, I’ve never cheated on my wife. Can’t imagine disrespecting my wife in such manner or joining a hookup app. Not all of all of us are dogs. We have a one-year old and I want to be the best possible example of a man I can for him.

Kai, our OP go dey fear pass now.

@OP- was your husband in Nig in the recent past?

LyfeJennings:


U think
There are millions of Nigerians on Tinder
As a matter of fact Tinder us an ashawo app here in Nigeria
If U need call girls, just go to Tinder
Olosho wey dey there reach 10Billion

Uisce:
A married man has no business being on Tinder. Shameful.



It's a dating site/app with the reputation of being a "hookup" app, designed to facilitate sexual encounters.

Ok.

It's pathetic OP, sorry about this, I just hope your husband cares about you enough to use condoms with the hookups. May God help you pull through this.

Are there any cracks in your marriage that'll make him go this route? The aspect of being so truthful on a dating app when he can't be certain if he's being catfished or not is alarming. Doesn't really sound like he's looking for a fling. I'm just tryna pick his mind at the moment and can't say I'm succeeding. Do you think he's bored or attention starved? You just have to talk with him n let him know his ass has been busted.

jess2019:


I went through his phone last night and noticed he fixed a date with a lady but the lady didn't turn up. He chatted that most people dont like dating black men that he is black. He was actually truthful in telling her everything about him, how long he is here, his occupation. But they didn't talk about whether he has children. Do I still have to chat him up with a fake account when I already have this evidence? I also have a copy of bank statements to tinder. I dont know if I could go through this tonight again as I couldn't sleep last night and I have a baby that depends on me.

justnock:
Join Tinder discreetly and DM him. "To catch a thief, act like a thief."

i tried to do that but I cant find him. I have his profile but he put his location lagos NIGERIA. I did same but tinder is still giving me people close to city i live

jess2019:
I was going through something and noticed that my husband has paid for 6months gold subscription to tinder last month. We have a little baby. I have been thinking on how to confront him about this. I cant believe he would do something like this when I am struggling with sleepless night with a baby. I will confront him once I get enough evidence even though I won't be able to trust him ever again.
NB. We live outside Nigeria

Aunty, it's not hard. Put your profile on tinder too.

Go for a date every other week with a different guy.

Tell your husband to get you a nanny. If he has money to spend on ashawo on tinder, he can use the money to focus on his family

farady:
OP, I think your relationship with your husband is not in top shape. Come on, if you guys are into each other. call, send texts, while away in the office/work, talk when together, do things together with good sex, chances that he will venture into such will be very slim. Chances are that he's seeking attention etc.

So, i'll advice don't make trouble out of it, if really value your union and wish to make it work. You both need to sit down and critically do a forensic check up on yourselves, tell yourselves what is failing and pray together to God to help you. Cheers!

No mind am.

funmisticqueen2:
Aunty, it's not hard. Put your profile on tinder too.

Go for a date every other week with a different guy.

Tell your husband to get you a nanny. If he has money to spend on ashawo on tinder, he can use the money to focus on his family

Do urs too dear op, what a man can do a woman can also. The fact is, he's there to fvck other women asap. tinder, same like same and meet later and fvck to their fill. that's what tinder is for op. Your husband has been fvcking younger ladies with nice boobs, no cellulite, no extra tummy and with good sexy shape that are willing to do what u haven't been doing sexually with him. You dont svck his D they way he wants to, u remember when he told you he wants it like this and u said ur tired? he told u to do it like this and u said no u can't do that? why are u worried now that other flexible, sexy, younger, tighter puccy ladies on tinder now has to come in and do your job for you. Keep going through his phone you hear? and so it at night when he's asleep so that he won't stop u. yeye.
@jess2019

ur not sweet anymore or look good anymore so he needs compensation and has to find happiness and orgasm somewhere else. u can chill and talk about how uncomfortable it makes u with him or u can do exactly what Funmistic said here but pls dont tell him just do ur thing and meet guys nnfvck too. Let's see how ur union works since two wrongs are making rides nowadays.

jess2019:


i tried to do that but I cant find him. I have his profile but he put his location lagos NIGERIA. I did same but tinder is still giving me people close to city i live

Madam why Lagos? why do u want to find him on tinder? he's not trying to find you so u should concentrate on finding other guys and do what he's doing with the ladies he's looking for on tinder. He's looking for fresh, younger, sexy, adorable chicks that are tight down there and not you. Please do u and let him do him peacefully.

You are not okay at all and i pity the woman you are with.
If she was the husband, will you say the same?

She should be scared of being single because the husband is a Demi God?

Thank God the husband is not as stu pid as you.

RisenPhoenix:
What were you looking for when you found his subscription and where? And what exactly is your objective for confronting him? Go ahead and pour fuel on the fire. Single motherhood beckons.

If you really need help or truthful answers and solution to your issue then call on Ubunja and hopefully he responds to u.

SoftChordz:
Do urs too dear op, what a man can do a woman can also. The fact is, he's there to fvck other women asap. tinder, same like same and meet later and fvck to their fill. that's what tinder is for op. Your husband has been fvcking younger ladies with nice boobs, no cellulite, no extra tummy and with good sexy shape that are willing to do what u haven't been doing sexually with him. You dont svck his D they way he wants to, u remember when he told you he wants it like this and u said ur tired? he told u to do it like this and u said no u can't do that? why are u worried now that other flexible, sexy, younger, tighter puccy ladies on tinder now has to come in and do your job for you. Keep going through his phone you hear? and so it at night when he's asleep so that he won't stop u. yeye.
@jess2019

ur not sweet anymore or look good anymore so he needs compensation and has to find happiness and orgasm somewhere else. u can chill and talk about how uncomfortable it makes u with him or u can do exactly what Funmistic said here but pls dont tell him just do ur thing and meet guys nnfvck too. Let's see how ur union works since two wrongs are making rides nowadays.

I didn't say she should sleep with other men o!

Just go out with them.

RisenPhoenix:
What were you looking for when you found his subscription and where? And what exactly is your objective for confronting him? Go ahead and pour fuel on the fire. Single motherhood beckons.

Trouble de sleep Yang's go wake am...what do u women gain from searching ur partners phones and device? when u finally get that thing u have been looking for u now start feeling bad. who jumps into water and hopes not to get wet?! only a dumb fvcker. She will do nothing else but pour fuel on fire like u said.
Leave ur husband's phones oo, u have won among all these flimsies by being his wife that means he values u more than them but needs a joy ur not bringing at home.

Ubunja please attend to her case.

funmisticqueen2:
I didn't say she should sleep with other men o!

Just go out with them.

Going with them is as good as sleeping with them so jess2019 should as well go hard or go home. I hate halfassing things, if u want to do something do it to the brim, why waste other guys time by just going on a date?!?! on tinder!!?? u better respect ur fellow tinder folks and not waste their time, we no come tinder to chat and laugh, we on tinder to meet, laugh and fvck the hell outta each other and bounce back to our normal lives.
Dont do it or go ahead and do it since u choose a dumbbb stupiddd approach to handling the situation that came up in ur home.

Let me give u a secret, once ur husband sees u on tinder u are as good as a babymama that lives with him which will be temporary just matter of time. Don't start what u can't finish, instead of u to ask guys how u can handle this u r busy doing what most women will do.

If u have husband problem its mostly reasonable guys that will show u how to handle ur husband because we know ourselves better than u women but no, a woman thinks she knows it all, flying all over the place with raging emotions.

u trying to fix it is like a man writing a book about the trimesters of pregnancy...... he doesn't know shitt about what he's doing.

generationz:



Register a fake account or get someone you trust to do it for you, chat him up with sexy pictures, organize a meeting at a restaurant and catch him red-handed.

lol hahahaha jess2019 u see why a man can't write a book about trimesters of pregnancy? its 50/50 here the person she trust can go ahead and fvck her husband and be her husbands information. have seen it happen severally, bitchess can switch with the right words, right moves, right touches and emotional stimulation.

Gloriagee:
Waoh, all the peeps I know that are on tinder are outside the country including the Op. Most respondents on this thread also seemed unaware too. I never join o as I dont want my husband to open his own thread na

Yuck to those looking for hookups after payment. Glorified prostitution

hahahaha tinder? outside country? u havent really checked out Naija online matters. Tinder is just like Facebook here in naija, felt like asking u what rock u crawled out of, you'd be surprised the type of folks on it, your boss, boyfriend or coworkers can be on it. Dont look down on anyone, we are all human.

jess2019:


I wonder the kind of friendship a married man is looking for on tinder? what happens to communicating with me like an adult or atleast be helping with a baby.... in that way all three of us will be bonding. With this behaviour is he looking for a way to break his marriage ? I still dont understand the reason behind it

That’s why you have to talk to him. To find out the reason behind it . Just be wise about the approach .
The following could be the reason you seek
1. He is a womanizer /cheat
2. He is bored in the new environment and wants to explore and make new friends
3. You bore him and he just wants to have a female friend

Looking down on people on top tinder. It's not that serious.

SoftChordz:
hahahaha tinder? outside country? u havent really checked out Naija online matters. Tinder is just like Facebook here in naija, felt like asking u what rock u crawled out of, you'd be surprised the type of folks on it, your boss, boyfriend or coworkers can be on it. Dont look down on anyone, we are all human.

jess2019:


i tried to do that but I cant find him. I have his profile but he put his location lagos NIGERIA. I did same but tinder is still giving me people close to city i live

Something tells me he is up to mischief. Don't fret. Study him, be nice to him but don't act suspicious around him. Try spicing up your sex life with him. Be spontaneous...he might just be bored, sexually or emotionally. I know you're currently going through a lot on your own, but you will be all right, ma'am.

Wetin u sef dey find for tinder? U were going g through something

olabrinks:
Men will always be men. Most of them cheat even if you are the best wife in the world. Don’t even beat yourself up about it, it happens to most women even if you look like Beyoncé.

What I will advise is, take care of your child and try to take care of yourself. Focus on you. If you have any male friends that you can confide in, to distract your mind then do it. Try to look after your appearance. Don’t make yourself miserable, getting premature wrinkles and making yourself old before your time for this man. Be happy and joyful. Eventually he will use his mouth to confess what he’s been up to.

before u know am, that male friend don bang her.

next advice plzzzzzz........

Gloriagee:
Kai, our OP go dey fear pass now.

@OP- was your husband in Nig in the recent past?

Why did u ask? The account was opened on January 16th so he has been here with me.

Hello Jess, I'm asking cos u said he listed his location as Lagos not your current location. In addition, the guys here have enlightened me as to the kind of stuff that happens on 'Nigerian' tinder.

jess2019:

Why did u ask? The account was opened on January 16th so he has been here with me.