Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,158,145 members, 7,835,831 topics. Date: Tuesday, 21 May 2024 at 03:47 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Story; A Troubled Married Man (6872 Views)
She Is Pushing Me , My Wife Called Me A Vegetable - Read My Story / You Must Marry Me - Lady Tells Married Man / Man Leaks Facebook Chats Of His Wife With Married Man (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply) (Go Down)
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Tushnigerian(f): 8:10am On Apr 24, 2020 |
Uncle wey mumu! You want us to insult your wife, kudos to that woman. You’re such a Baby goat, highly irresponsible and very lazy! I’m so irritated, why won’t your wife be insubordinate. At 39, complaints upon complaints, since you lost your job, you didn’t go for any skill sir? No trainings or even buisiness? You’re a fool sir with all due respect. After you won that contract, why didn’t you press further, you didn’t set up yourself at all, no stock, no bonds, no treasury bills, no investments, you’re a Big Fool!! You kept saying I, I, you never considered your wife, your wife is stressed, she’s worn out and tired! I’m sure she looks older than a age, you can’t even pamper her yet you complain and complain. I hope none of your children takes after you, everything you listed about your wife are all workable, she’s the victim, I really sympathize with her. You cannot start Uber because you’re owing rent blah blah, but you can go and enjoy beer and p.soup, gosh, you’re so spoilt. You’re a Lazy man, put your shit together and get up!!! Stupid man. 11 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by COURVOISier(m): 10:41am On Apr 24, 2020 |
Op, YOU ARE A MUMU MAN. 3 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by djon78(m): 12:15pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Kenturkey048: Two wrongs don't make right In my response I said that sure the woman has her own issues But weighing things on the scale according to what he told us He has a lot of issues And he doesn't even agree to that So wisdom demands that he work on himself first If he gets his acts right He can then be ready to face his woman's issues But if he refuses Divorce and separation will be on the cards And honestly divorce won't favor this guy I can bet with all my money That this guy can never get a woman To tolerate half of what his wife has been tolerating from him If he wants flings he can get that But for long-term relationship No woman will tolerate those He is lucky Some mean women can even Find ways to terminate his life If he gives them too much problem So better he works on his marriage With a woman that tolerates his crap And still agrees to live under same roof with him His wife still loves him It's a woman that loves a man That will be checking his phone Even calling those women to warn them A woman that doesn't love him Will just leave him to his ways without Bordering or giving any damn |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by asapeola(m): 1:03pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Dear OP, honestly i admire the honesty in ur story and i kinda have some similar traits especially when it comes to family meals and indecisivesness. I dnt like to worry abt food. I dnt care - whatever my woman prepares is what i eat. However, i have come to understand that that's an aspect of a woman one might not get rly lucky to change. So after 9yrs, its expected u ought to av adjusted to wife's "flaw". As per u loosing ur job, i still wanna go easy u cos i have experienced that people react differently to setbacks. Some will spiral down n it affects so many aspects of their lives. I think ur taking ur job loss too badly. Your decision to spend the 7-digit profit u once made was a consequence of lack of foresight and ur wife is still pained. I still wouldnt wanna be harsh on u cos u were out of job n cash for a longtime n u only saw the money as a windfall. U ddnt plan for the future and ur wife was concerned u ddnt consult her before blowing off the cash. Your sit-outs with ur friends isnt totally out of place. Sometimes we all need our pals to make us feel kinda loved n save us stress from other fronts. Notwithstanding, u must realise, u r responsible for ur wife, 3 kids and a maid under ur roof. U cannot afford to live ur life as if ur single and alone. Out of self-respect for urself, i suggest u shld reduce time spent with ur friends. Our people say"friendship isn't sweet if one part of the relationship always lacks" Chill responsibly. U need to really calm down and see ur wife in a different light. Task her more mentally. Like ask her for suggestions on jobs or businesses u cld try. I have discovered that women have the simplest solutions to the most complex situations. After all, u said she's made of beauty and brains. Not all wives nag when their husbands come late if they no ur out there hustling ur ass out. In ur honest story, u said u argue politics with ur friends, i suggest u either show less interest during such discussion or u ask for more productive talks. Ur current situation is not one for politics arguments and ofkos u guys do talk abt ur sexcapades. That's not right honestly. I think ur worried (reason ur hair is all grey at 39) but ur not rly handling ur situation in a wise manner. This is a time to be sober, appreciate ur wife, love ur family (go out n get stuffs for ur kids even if it's snacks), help out at home n i dnt think any one would begrudge u if u wanna chill with dem boys once in a while. Finally, Be more responsible with future finances, plan with ur wife and don't be too ashamed to even ask for help in watever form. God bless you bro and be with ur family! 3 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 1:19pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
drmikeadams:Are you single? Husband material much. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by drmikeadams(m): 1:23pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
[quote author=chiddyok post=88801369] Are you single? Husband material much. [/quote[center][/center] ] am single ooo,,, come and pay my bride price 1 Like |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 1:31pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
[quote author=drmikeadams post=88801492][/quote] No ooo. I’m not a feminist ooo. I like money and care, and I know you will take care of me. I don’t know how to wash but I can cook and keep house, I’ll bring my washing machine when I’m coming. I’m also working. Should I call the wedding planner? |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by drmikeadams(m): 1:34pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
chiddyok: 1 Like
|
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by wingmanIII: 1:44pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Mumu man. You cheat on your wife. You are not discreet about the fact that you cheat. You are not bringing in any income. Yet you want the poor woman to embrace you and Pat you on the back. 2 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 2:29pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
I think you're not also keeping responsible friends, they should set up something for you or get you a job. If they're responsible, they would find a way of resolving this issue without getting to SM. When they also get broke, you'll know the reality of life. If you really want your respect back, get something doing and take care of your bills and that of your family. If your children's become of age, and you're not the one spending on them, you'll know you made a grave mistakes of your life. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by misreal(m): 2:50pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
baldman:you deserve a kiss sir.. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Ibechris2: 3:01pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
One thing i like about u is that u detailed everything and showing areas u have messed up but for ur wife,u married her because she is reserved. Generally,I don't think both of have any problem. The only problem I see here is the fact that you need to find something doing, and I am sure u will see your wife change for the better. Try not to have anything to do with women other than ur wife and u will see peace return to ur home. Wish u the best. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by baldman: 3:03pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Sorry about the reference to you shouting at your wife in the presence of the maid. I think that came from the general impression, rather than anything you wrote in your post, I apologize for that. What you call salt and Maggi usually comes with the territory of your disclosed situation. I respect your maturity and willingness to make it right, and that is why I took so much time to type my opinion and this response. I hope you will be able to get past my' excesses' and deal with the relevant issues. Again my apologies if I said anything unnecessarily offensive. In summary, please do right by your woman, she is not perfect, but your love, your understanding, loyalty, faithfulness, commitment to the union will go a long way in moulding her to the woman you desire or something pretty close to it. Be the man you want your beloved daughter to marry.
3 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 3:06pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
I wonder why there is a househelp in the house when u are jobless. What do u do exactly? We all must remain married by force 2 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by nahzyla: 3:36pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
OP has deactivated eyaaa The guy thought it will be business as usual on nairaland with everyone coming here to bash the wife. Eyaaaaaa OP don't pick offence from peoples replies here, the truth is that your actions and entitlement are shocking. How can you still be keeping late nights, collecting numbers and flirting with girls, you don't have any job for years now, your wife is feeding you, you dont help with chores, you are even complaining that she seeks your opinion on decisions to take at home. I think your wife has very low self esteem and inferiority complex that's why she puts up with you. I won't lie I could relate with how she is feeling, maybe her inability to make friends and socialize is killing her confidence and making her stay with you because she feels that is what a 'defective' person like herself deserves. Try this nonsense with a confident and articulate Nigerian woman make you know how far. When she is done with you you will have valid and sensible complaints to make on nairaland about her behavior not this noise you came to make here 9 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by bukatyne(f): 3:39pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Kenturkey048: Insensitivity? The OP should overhaul himself jare. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by eyinjuege: 3:40pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Useless excuse of a man. A wasteman But surely, OP must be a troll? Someone cannot be so foolish, to bask so much in his arrogance while ignorant? 4 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by akaahs(m): 9:46pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
Ogah, the way U dey respond to advise his annoying. Every of ur comments is trying to justify urself and put the blame on wife which have landed U into where U are today. For God sake, can U try and look at urself and tell urself U have been fair to ur wife? Abeg change the circle of ur friend and stay at home with her for Month and see whether there ll be no change in your house and from her. 3 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by infotainment(m): 10:25pm On Apr 24, 2020 |
I got this from a marriage WhatsApp group. Maybe it can help u THE PRICE OF PEACE AND HARMONY IN EVERY MARRIAGE. Many years ago I listened to a preacher share about how his wife would leave the television on at night and sleep off and they lived in a country where you pay based on how long you keep the TV on. Leaving the TV on therefore increases the television bill. That attitude of his wife would annoy him and he was always angry at his wife for doing that yet it continued. It was obvious it was going to become a strain in the marriage. Then one day while ruminating over this issue,I asked myself, “Is your marriage not worth fifty dollars extra at the end of the month? If this attitude of your wife will mean an extra bill of fifty dollars is it too much to pay for peace to be in your marriage?” Unlike me, my wife is not a morning person. I can wake up by 2:00am, work till 5:00am, go back to bed and still get up by 6:00am and start my day. For my wife, I literally have to drag her out of bed in the morning. Her day begins only after she has had her bath. In some homes, the wife is the one who goes to the kitchen to heat up water for the family to bathe. I guess it comes naturally with women. In my home, heaven help me if I wait for my wife to do that. I will wait for a long time. So I have resolved to make that my responsibility. Even with the kids I will still have to be the one doing that in the morning because my wife is not a morning person. If that is the price I have to pay for peace to be in my home, it is worth it. We are talking about the price of peace. One of my friends shared with me how his wife will never monitor the fuel gauge when driving. It is when the car finally stops that she realizes the car has run out of fuel. Guess who she will call? The husband. He will have to be the one to sort out the problem. After several of such calls he had to find a way around it. He ensures the fuel tank is full at the beginning of the week which will take the wife through the week. That way he does not get any phone call that the car has stopped. It is the price of peace for him. When I was working on this article I requested that people share some of the prices they have had to pay to maintain peace in their homes. I got a lot of responses that revealed that no marriage is perfect. The reason we see certain marriages as better than ours is because the parties in those marriages are ready to pay certain prices to maintain peace in their homes. Let me share a few of the responses I got. "In my home I just have to tolerate my husband’s attitude. He has this habit of talking over issues repeatedly. He can talk, talk and talk when a situation happens and will nag you till you fall over. So to allow peace what I do is try and keep my mouth shut. No argument, no talking back or simply walk away so that peace can reign." -Ajoke Mariam Osikoya "I usually don't turn off the lights in a room when I'm done using it. At the beginning of my marriage hubby will tell me to always make sure I do that when exiting the room, but after correcting me several times without change, he decided to just check back anytime I leave a room and will help turn the lights off. He just stopped complaining and started helping me do it. Eventually, I had to determine in myself to be more aware and I've gotten better doing that. -Olubunmi Adeleye, "My wife has a thing for matchsticks. After using one, she keeps it for 'emergency'. This act irritates me. No matter how long we discuss this (more than 9 years now) she still does. So I decided to dispose them and then I offer her a fresh one should an 'emergency' arise." -Dapo Shodunke "I don't pressurize my husband to do or not to do anything, especially something he really wants to, or really doesn't want to do. Putting pressure on him will only irritate him. I keep quiet and I pray instead. That way, I have peace and also get what I want. On the other hand, my husband will always hang the mosquito nets, switch off the lights and unplug my phones, because I always sleep off. He has stopped complaining. He will do the job instead." -Bisola Muktar Mary Those were just a few of the several responses I got about the price of peace that people are paying in their homes. A lot of other people were encouraged when they saw that they were not alone. You think you are the only one having an issue until you listen to others. Sometimes we need to do things we don’t like for the sake of peace. If it is not too high a price then why not just do it and move on with our lives? Not every battle is worth fighting. That is why it is important to be able to lead yourself because for these people whose reports we just read you find that either they or their spouses took responsibility for peace. That is part of what personal leadership is about. I could have picked a fight with my wife for refusing to get up from the bed in the morning. Hamzah could have picked a fight with his wife for that thing with the matchsticks. Fatimah’s husband could have picked a fight with her for always forgetting to turn off the lights. But personal leadership helped us to take the other route thereby maintaining peace in our homes. Now this does not mean you will never have to correct each other in the relationship or continually be in endurance mode throughout the marriage especially when it has to do with abuse. That is a completely different matter. You don’t endure abuse. But instead of fighting over why your spouse always presses the toothpaste tube from the middle, why not buy a second one so you have yours and he has his and both of you have peace? Has that not solved the problem? ....Part 2 |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 1:05am On Apr 25, 2020 |
baldman:I have always known bald men to be wise. You did not dissapoint. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by veave(f): 8:52am On Apr 25, 2020 |
1. Design a food timetable for your wife. 2. Help with the kids everyday before you run off (dress up for school, homework, evening bath, feed the younger ones) 3. Machines don't drop clothes in hampers, humans do - pick up after yourself and every other person. 4. Dedicate one night every week specifically for you and your wife only this day and time is for both of you to do or go anywhere or anything she likes, thank God you have a maid. For someone who hasn't had a job for 2years and their still calling to ask what you would like to eat... Hmmmm, advice your self. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by GHoJes: 9:56am On Apr 25, 2020 |
I hope you see this. You were honest at the start, then you started watering things when insults were coming too much than you thought. Truth is you are suffering stuff but the funny thing is you want your wife to ameliorate your suffering because she some how contributed to it but what you don't know is that, she is suffering too and you contributed to it. Both of you are dealing with the effects of each other actions yet don't want to shift grounds. You know, you said your wife is ignorant, you have become too focus on her inefficiencies that you can't see that your actions are driving her worse. You struck me when you said you can't promise you will change from cheating but somehow you want your wife to stop nagging. Hey, that's a woman that love you too much to even be bothered with what you do with your body even when you are contributing nothing to the home. Some women would have a given you a better ride for your game so much that your esteem will not afford you an erection any longer. You say your wife don't understand personality without knowing you are same or worse because if you knew, you could have helped her shortcomings and complemented her. Like what is wrong with planning the meals since you the better, buying the clothes etc. I believe there are things she also does better than you that you have not been able to rival in 9years. You even married her selfishly and expect her not to make her self demands too. You said you married her because she wasn't the outing type, whereas you are the social type. You left your kind because you know they are prone to waywardness and went for the homely one who less selfishly is demanding for a homely man-her kind. If you want to see real change oga, start from yourself, change your bad ways and friends, you know them and see your wife and home change. 2 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Taiye4Christ(m): 12:33pm On Apr 25, 2020 |
I just created this alternate moniker to hide my identity. Dear OP, Like you said, this is an alternate moniker and you have deactivated. I know you are reading through the thread with your main. Normally, I don't proffer advice on issues as this for some reasons. I just read and go. However, for yours, I have to switch from phone to laptop to enable me type what I hope won't be a too lengthy post but that will try to address your issues appropriately. I can see you are in combative mode to some people's opinions already. However, I do hope you can go back and read their comments again. Not because you will feel attacked (yes, you will!) but because out of every 'nonsense', you will glean some sense. I am attending to this because I hope you are not here to get some sympathy, or rationalize what is happening in your home on your own part, but because you genuinely want a solution other than divorce. See marriage is a union of two imperfect people who have found a way to tolerate, forgive, and make considerations for each other. You have been in this thing for 9 years. Do you see yourself continuing with this same situation for the next 20, 30, 40 years Obviously, something needs to give way. Sacrifices have to be made on both sides and I dare say it begins from you as THE MAN. If you are able to do the right things from this point on, you are assured of salvaging that happiness in your home. So let's begin with YOU (I will come to your wife's problem: ignorance and incomprehensibility). First step to solving a problem is recognizing its existence and that it is a problem to you. You are the social guy and your wife is not. I believe her introverted nature has doused your energetic, exuberant lifestyle to some extent, which is to be expected. Marriage does that to us all. I have a friend who can't seem to stay home for 2 straight hours even in this lockdown. You feel she is trying to change/cage you by pulling you away from your friends. But when it really comes to it and you have to choose, who comes first: your immediate family or friends? She asks you what to cook daily? I am sure you have had conversations around this before now and even arguments. You can do two things here: 1. Speak with her again. Have her cook whatever she is comfortable with. When she is cooking, she is doing so for the whole house, not just herself. That means even the few days she cooks what you don't like so much, you will manage to eat it. And for days you have special requests, you will let her know beforehand what your cravings are. Heck, this will take a whole lot of pressure off her 2. Sit together and prepare a food timetable, which can be reviewed every three or six months. This is a good fix to your problem now. Women say a lot of things when they are upset though there are lines that should not be crossed, I think. In cases like that of your maid and sick son, when she's a bit calm, talk to her and let her know you feel hurt by those allegations and she should try to process before venting. You really need to work on your hanging out late at night with friends. If you are really really serious about this, can you give your circle a month's break. I have been in a situation like this and I know how difficult it is to break off. But hey, remember sacrifices Now dedicate this one month to getting back your home, to getting things right, to spending quality time with your family. If you think of it, what do you stand to lose? Some bottles, flitting gists, flirts. These are not necessities you can't do without for one month. Your wife comes home to meet you there with the kids. Your marriage reeks of lack of communication and play time. You spend more time talking to your wife and rediscovering yourselves. Remind yourself what made you fall in love with her in the first place, share funny memories, relive the moment. Do things together, sing together, bath together, heck spend some time helping her out in the kitchen. Just be there. She will notice the change. Her nagging will reduce, trust me! There may be stress piling up from work for her. Things might have irked her. The least you can do is to be there, listen to her vent, let her ease the frustration by sharing with you. On the other hand, your not been there paints a picture of an unsupportive spouse who does not just care what she goes through nor appreciates her. Need I say your unfaithful lifestyle has to stop! It's funny how you think you only cheated when you had a couple of sex outside marriage. I hate to judge, but because you need the truth, your messages to other ladies and calling them sweet endearing names is emotional cheating. You are well on your way. See, I get, as a married man, lots of ladies will be attracted to you (like the wedding band is a kind of magnet), but you have to be more responsible and know the limits. There are things you can no longer do as a married man (given the oath taken before God and before men to be faithful to your spouse). The attention is all cool and fans your ego as a man, but hey you are MARRIED. If your wife comes to you that she's had sex with a colleague from her office during this rough patch with you, I guess you won't be too excited about the news. Your claim your wife's driving you out to do these things by her attitude does not hold water. You don't cut off the head to cure the headache. Please do not put yourself in compromising situations like you explained (which if you look closely, is related to hanging out with friends). Let these girls matter. When the chips are down, guess who will be there for you? YOUR WIFE! If you are clean, your phone will not be locked from your wife. Change, please. Let her see you are accountable and have nothing to hide. At least, that what marriage means to me. Bros, you have been plain so far with the situation. I know you can do better than this in marriage. You can be a better man. We all can be better version of ourselves. Let's not entertain excuses why we can't be. To your wife's issue (ignorant and incomprehensive), you know you can't totally change someone's personality (like you have resisted her changing yours). However, you can find ways to influence/condition her. If I may ask, what kind of work is she into? Asking because you mentioned she is not intuitive enough for your liking. Complement her, build her, look for ways to help her. If you don't, same issues will persist for many more years without solution until you help her out. Sometimes, you don't have to make these decisions for her directly. Just lead her through the thought process and let her figure things out on her own. With time, she will learn. These things can be learnt. What you have been giving her before now is the end product (the decision). Take her through the process, let her know how her mind should work as you want. And you have to be patient. You will not get the result in a day or a week. I am sure from all these, you are able to see one or two actionable you want to work on. Truth is no marriage works. YOU make it work. YOU do the work. Sorry for the epistle. Just want to cover as much of your issues as possible. If you need clarity, feel free to dm me, please. I pray your marriage works out and works well. Bless up! PS: And uh, you need to really do something about your job situation urgently too. Can't go into that now (battery gone). 1 Like |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 10:33pm On Apr 25, 2020 |
To be honest you're quite irresponsible and this is coming from a guy who doesn't really judge married guys who enjoy having a good time. Considering that you're jobless, one would expect you manage your finances and focus more on getting life back on track. This should be a time for sober reflection. You string girls along just for fun? A married man saying this? You have no iota of respect for your wife. Even if you are still playing the field which you shouldn't, you should be absolutely discreet and wipe out all traces. Your wife is what she is to a large extent due to your lifestyle. You are acting like a man child. Try and change your lifestyle and see if she doesn't improve. If she doesn't, get back to us and we'll tell you how to put her in her place. Till then, you are disgracing married men. He who comes to equity must come with clean hands. At 39, I expect better. This is the kind of thing I should hear from a 30 year old who just got married. I was not a saint at the beginning of my marriage, I'm still no saint now but I know my family comes first and when the chips are down, your wife and kids are the people to stand by you. It's best to invest in them now. 3 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Nobody: 10:48pm On Apr 25, 2020 |
As per your wife, my wife also leaves the buying of clothes for my kids to me. She knows I have better taste and there is no crime in that. I follow her to buy her clothes as I know what fits her better, it's funny but true. My wife asks my opinion about what to eat also but I usually tell her anything she likes as long as it doesn't not include food I dislike. As for being absent minded, there is little you can do about it. You take up the responsibility of cautioning the kids or keeping your stuff securely. My man, I'm not saying your wife has no faults but I think her faults are little compared to some crazies out there. I also feel she'll be a better person if you also change your ways and act responsibly. Please, there is no issue too big in marriage to solve as long as both parties are willing to make effort. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Graxie(f): 11:46am On Apr 26, 2020 |
Where are those people claiming that women don't divorce because they are jobless? I hope you have read this and seen for yourself. Most Nigerian working class women tolerate cheating men and abusive husband's because of societal discrimination. If this woman decides to divorce this man, people will judge her. It takes a very strong woman to walk away. I hope next generation of men and women will do better than what we have now. 2 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Perogbangba(f): 12:38pm On Apr 26, 2020 |
Permit me to ask sir? which categories of friends do u keep? All I see are friends that subtract and divide From your life. Friends that are only interested in buying you drinks,pepper soup and keeping you out late in the night at bars.Not those interested in coming together to see what they can do to help you in terms of your joblessness. Now, let me ask you, if the table is turned around and you discovered your wife flirts with men and she claims to have nothing to do with them, what would be your reaction? Oga! pack well, you no try at all... Be humble and try to renew your ways. Then, you will have peace in your home. Shalom! |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by lasher1: 11:46am On Apr 27, 2020 |
Cheif, you mean your wife goes to work early in the morning comes back to cook for you while you were all day idle at home. You leave her to go hang out with you your friends till around 12 to 1am?!!! And you are wondering why she shouts and nags every time you get back late? Did it ever occur to you that she was worried about your safety and cares enough that you get back home before she can lock up the house and go to bed assured her family is safe. Do you know your selfishness will make her not get enough sleep cos she being the breadwinner of the house has to get up early, prepare the kids and go to work the next day. How do you think she can be productive? See eh? I use to assume I was irresponsible because I secretly cheat on my wife with a side chick, though I provide, protect, encourage and care for her in every expected way, But I now realize that I'm only a back benching floor member in irresponsibility while you are the Exco president! 2 Likes |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by andyanders: 10:46pm On Apr 27, 2020 |
Perogbangba: matured advised. He should understand that those friends paying 4 drinks and hotels don't like him. His wife wants him 2 get back on his feet in order 2 help her drive the home. How can u be jobless and be keeping late night. I can't see myself outside home 7pm, unless trafic. Let op key to ur advise. |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by ayobarmy(m): 2:41am On Apr 28, 2020 |
Sir, I also shared in some of the problems you're facing in your home, but your own case is a bit different from mine because, You are very lucky you have a working Wife. Sir I think you are the architect of your own problem and I have my reasons 1: You have been married for 9yrs and yet, you don't Understand your Wife 2: You're married with 3 lovely Kids, yet you stay out till midnight in a beer parlour 3: You still keep friends your wife is not comfortable with..... Solutions.... 1: Try and see things from your wife's perspective, I understand she doesn't have a good sense of judgement, but Sir I think you can help her get better if only you can pay more attention to her.... 2: Try all you can, to stop staying out in beer parlour till late night, Sir! "Ijakumo ki n rinde osan, Eni a biire ki n rinde Oru" Please try and spend more time with your family than Staying in that beer parlour, Infact now that you don't have a Job Is the best time for you to turn things around... Maybe the reason why you've never gotten a new Job is because God is waiting for you to correct your wrongs.... 3: Try and Limit the Numbers of friends you have, expecially the ones your wife complained about, because I can't see any good friend, paying for hotel rooms for his married friend to have Sex with another woman. Moreso, when your woman keep warning you about a friend, definitely she's seeing something that you need to pay attention to.... Conclusion: Sir I know it's not easy with the kind of person you are, but try all you can to re- arrange your home, because you are the head of the House.... I pray that God will will give you the strength to do what is right and give you a better Job Soonest Regards to your beautiful Wife, She's is a strong woman, Men Like Us are Very difficult to manage.... Peace...... 1 Like |
Re: My Story; A Troubled Married Man by Prettiepearlz(f): 1:02am On May 01, 2020 |
piroux:Thank you! Though the Op has deactivated his account, I am sure he is reading with his main account. This is the first I would be reading a thread where both men and women are on the page on here, which is very rare. Every one knows how toxic this forum can be when it comes to man and woman issue But he kept going on and on about how "bad" she is, refusing to accept his wrongs. And the OP is full of excuses, someone suggested Uber, he came up with an excuse of not having 120k to fix the issues before the car can be Uber certified, How about the friends whom OP say buys him drink, offers to pay for hotel bookings, pay a girl to sleep with him raise the 120k for him if they truly have his best interest at heart as he paints them? The kind of company you keep as a family man/woman matters! Those ones are of no good to him. Would he allow all sorts of "harmless flirting" " Late night waka" from his wife? Op is dishing what he can't take. 1 Like |
Men Should Stop Sucking Their Wife’s Breast, It’s For Babies – Daily Post. / Children's Day Today: Share Your Most Fun Memory / My Wife Abandoned Me While On A BP Of 250/150.(A Cameroonian Nairalander's Tale)
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 182 |