₦airaland Forum

piamily:
Okay. There’s thing guy I met one time last year. So he came up bold and said he was interested in a relationship. He didn’t even waste time. I was impressed . Normally I was supposed to dish out my “naija shakara girls style” you know, but I didn’t . After some days I agreed to date him.

I found out he’s easy going so I decided to give in and be mutual with the love and attraction etc. as soon as I got interested, he withdrew.

I noticed it . I don’t understand why a man will do this. Was he not interested? And does he expect the woman to hate him.

I see some men complain about ladies being hard to get and now a lady didn’t play that much hard yet the man withdrew a bit. Still don’t get men sometimes sha
It has happened to me sometimes..
I may admire a girl in the first instance but after coming closer to the girl and relating with her closely I will discover that I don't really like her to the extent of being in relationship with her...
I will just withdraw instead of toying with her emotions
I have done it to some girls

Liliantalks:
lol he might not be short in the department sha

I hv learnt a big lesson from life , let me share with you , when I was younger i had a lot of guys coming my way , but back then I was so ignorant on what I should look for in a man , now I am older I regret some guys I let go, guys I felt we’re too short , talks too much , swaggerless , aggressive , smoker , etc . Guys i liked were hoes , I dated some but i was little or no value to them , I was there till they met another. Funny enough all the guys I wrote off r in a relationship n doing very well in their relationships ,loving there women silly , well some remain idiots lol

look for efforts , money, care and attention, that’s what really matters. Get a list of what u want in a man , and check if this guy meets 75% of it , if he does , accept him. He can still turn out to be a fool after sex o, I can’t give u any assurance, men r wicked . But that’s a step to the right direction.

piamily:
I have noticed men especially African men loose interest when a lady becomes interested in them even just a bit. I really don’t get it.

Do men expect women to hate them even when the men love the women? Cos I don’t understand if it should be mutual or not

Your views please

LordKO:
Two major reasons I know of are:

1. He values the girl a lot that he wouldn't want to waste her time or falsely raise her hope to enable her focus on others; maybe because (a) he observed differences between them that would prevent them from having a mutually healthy and happy relationship - and it's not a case of him being better than her, and vice versa. (b) He's in a committed relationship with another woman and holds the bond of the relationship sacred to the extent that he wouldn't like to desecrate it - so he has to withdraw attention from you (the girl) for the mutual good of all.

2. It could be that the girl did not meet the standard he held her from afar, this depends on what usually makes him fall in love - of course, this doesn't automatically mean that the girl is evil, in fact, it could even mean that it takes an evil girl to make him fall in love...

You just addressed my case..
I have left many girls wondering why acted silly..
I only want to date a girl who has never been in relationship before so that we can start together..many times I see church girls who attracted me but when I get close I used to hear different things from what I wanted.. I'd just withdraw
It has happened to me several times

ZINIBANKS:
True

There is one girl too I asked for her contact around last year December

I will call her text her she will reply after one week walai I no see that kind level for my life before

After some time of trying hard to get her niggar just free the bitch

It's was after two months or so I think
She's now texting me frequently I didn't reply

She called I was like who is this
She identify herself I just end the call he pain her start to feel remorse on WhatsApp just read her message and didn't reply

Niggas don't have time for shit

A time will come when the chaser will Also be chased
-dolly parton

Zoie:
The average Nigerian man suffers from an extremely weak self esteem that needs to stay constantly bloated to stay functional.
That's why they chase after ladies who treat them like shi.t and avoid ladies who show them love. The hunt makes them happy. The thrill of having to constantly woo a woman makes them feel good. Makes them feel she is better than the one who shows love even without being wooed..even if the former is a retired runs girl.

piamily:
Well he’s just short

Renida:
I feel sorry if such is the scenario. People lose interest once their person of interest for so many reasons. One of this which I think is the case here is psychological posturing. What this means is some people are used to working extremely hard aka hustling for things. Their entire life rests on a perspective that what they must have, they must work for, unfortunately some of this whole way of thinking affects even not working aspects of their lives. So in relationships for example, this kinds want to toast toast, chase and beg the woman, but if it doesn't follow this narrative and the lady makes asking her out easy, it poses no challenge and isn't mentally tasking. This makes them see lesser value however good such a partner maybe.


I believe the narrative above is the scenarios playing out here. It happens with women also. When people in this category don't suffer for a thing, their brain tricks them to assume it's worth lesser. It's purely psychological

Renida:
.

I didn't say Nigerian men. I simply wrote about some persons, male and female, humans in general. It's psychological immaturity. Don't let their immaturity lead you to form new unhealthy habits. If you like the person, keep them far, and watch them beg for your attention as they outgrow their mental posturing. For now, go for where you're worshipped, not where you're tolerated


As for me, I don't want a lady I have interest in making it hard, at my age, level of maturity, five minutes is what I want to bear chasing anyone. Nothing more. In fact, I rather be chased

Midenola:
How much?

Interested please

biggy26:
Cost?

akinszz:
how much?

zedegit:
,

Did you import it from America?

Besides how much?

josh005:
Whats the price

stevio:
How about a billard board?

boyjo:
You didn't get it.

The guy approached her first.
She liked him and agreed to date him without delay; she reciprocated his interest.
And as soon as she did, he withdrew.

piamily:
I have noticed men especially African men loose interest when a lady becomes interested in them even just a bit. I really don’t get it.

Do men expect women to hate them even when the men love the women? Cos I don’t understand if it should be mutual or not

Your views please

EmekaBlue:
wow...this make alot of sense

i just dont know why i find it hard to keep up what i started and i know she will be upset because i can stay 2days without even saying hi on WhatsApp talk more of calling and showing commitment

frankkydee:
That may be becos they sensed that the reason for you getting interested in them is for your personal benefits and not for a mutual benefits

Zoie:
The average Nigerian man suffers from an extremely weak self esteem that needs to stay constantly bloated to stay functional.
That's why they chase after ladies who treat them like shi.t and avoid ladies who show them love. The hunt makes them happy. The thrill of having to constantly woo a woman makes them feel good. Makes them feel she is better than the one who shows love even without being wooed..even if the former is a retired runs girl.

piamily:
I’ve had this experience with a guy that likes me so much and has chased me for about five years but yet I don’t find him attractive . What do I do I such situation? Should I give in ?

piamily:
I have noticed men especially African men loose interest when a lady becomes interested in them even just a bit. I really don’t get it.

Do men expect women to hate them even when the men love the women? Cos I don’t understand if it should be mutual or not

Your views please

Kekereekun123:
Cant relate dunno who you have been dating. These days people Bleep on the same day they meet or first date. You con dey expect man to chase u for long. Who u Who born you How do you exist

piamily:
Okay. There’s thing guy I met one time last year. So he came up bold and said he was interested in a relationship. He didn’t even waste time. I was impressed . Normally I was supposed to dish out my “naija shakara girls style” you know, but I didn’t . After some days I agreed to date him.

I found out he’s easy going so I decided to give in and be mutual with the love and attraction etc. as soon as I got interested, he withdrew.

I noticed it . I don’t understand why a man will do this. Was he not interested? And does he expect the woman to hate him.

I see some men complain about ladies being hard to get and now a lady didn’t play that much hard yet the man withdrew a bit. Still don’t get men sometimes sha

Johnson225:
Yes we also have it in stock. Reach me on Whatsapp

piamily:
Oh ! I get you now. So you’re saying Nigerian men really want ladies to play the hard to get very hard then. So why are they complaining. Well then I’ll keep playing it hard as usual since they think it was bread and butter they got in a platter of gold

Renida:
I feel sorry if such is the scenario. People lose interest once their person of interest for so many reasons. One of this which I think is the case here is psychological posturing. What this means is some people are used to working extremely hard aka hustling for things. Their entire life rests on a perspective that what they must have, they must work for, unfortunately some of this whole way of thinking affects even not working aspects of their lives. So in relationships for example, this kinds want to toast toast, chase and beg the woman, but if it doesn't follow this narrative and the lady makes asking her out easy, it poses no challenge and isn't mentally tasking. This makes them see lesser value however good such a partner maybe.


I believe the narrative above is the scenarios playing out here. It happens with women also. When people in this category don't suffer for a thing, their brain tricks them to assume it's worth lesser. It's purely psychological