₦airaland Forum

EgunMogaji2:
I've advised this before, I got some folks triggered. I expect the same now too.

The first advice first is not to get married. There's no benefit to getting married in this day and age. Getting children out of wedlock is no longer a taboo. You can get a "Domestic Coordinator" to do the same functions that a "Wife" will do. One of the "Side Chicks" can take care of the other room. Build your life and business/career. Travel the world, learn new cultures. Don't turn yourself into an educator/financier of someones Daughter.

Second advice is NOT to take a Nigerian girl from here to the USA. Best advice is to provide for her here. This is what got the Nazi Feministas triggered last time.

As for me I'm running away from this thread because they'll come for their father as usual

ednut1:
you see stupidity. They later come home to marry one amaka or lolade. Who will come over and taste freedom and the favorable laws there. Den he begins to lament

EgunMogaji2:
I've advised this before, I got some folks triggered. I expect the same now too.

The first advice first is not to get married. There's no benefit to getting married in this day and age. Getting children out of wedlock is no longer a taboo. You can get a "Domestic Coordinator" to do the same functions that a "Wife" will do. One of the "Side Chicks" can take care of the other room. Build your life and business/career. Travel the world, learn new cultures. Don't turn yourself into an educator/financier of someones Daughter.

Second advice is NOT to take a Nigerian girl from here to the USA. Best advice is to provide for her here. This is what got the Nazi Feministas triggered last time.

As for me I'm running away from this thread because they'll come for their father as usual

lefulefu:
lol its better yu just marry the devil u know than to be going back to naija looking for a bride.many yankee based naija guys who went home looking for homebase wife to bring to US have sorry tales to tell.if u still insist on marrying homebase just marry her and keep her in nigeria and be sending monthly upkeep then visit her during easter and christmas....but there chances she will codedly have a lover while u over there cos she go need man to warm her bed during the cold lonely nights.

pDudd:
Some people have been asking me to balance this equation because it seems like I am bashing Akata women and leaving my Nigerian sisters who reside in America. This thread is to state what to encounter if you are going into any kind of relationship with Nigerian women in America. I don't know about Nigerian women in UK, or anywhere else so I can't talk about that one.

This thread is not to bash Nigerian women in any way. So if you feel offended at any point in reading this, I'm sorry well in advance.

But I must tell the truth.

Hateful replies are welcome. I nor send anybody

larryking540:
My brother u don talk am finish o ...

The money u will waste sponsoring her over sea use am invest make she day watch the business with ur kids around her,,,she can come over to over see ,for a visit but to stay ,u go trigger expenses

pDudd:
First tip: Leave that your native brain in Nigeria.

If you're the kind of man that will sit on the sofa and be watching UEFA champions league and be telling a woman that she should go and cook, serve you, bring you water to drink and wash hand, you are in for a rude shock. Nigerian women in US have opened eye now o. They are not going to serve you like master and servant while your stretch your legs on sofa and be watching football.

If your mother did that for your father, please go and marry your mother so she too can come and be serving you like a king. Nigerian women ain't doing that for you.

Before you leave Nigeria, better learn how to cook, clean house, do laundry, go to buy groceries, take care of kids, and learn humility.

Learning humility is of utmost importance because the day you step your feet into America, you are now second to every woman. The American society favors women over men. They placea lot of value over men. So if you didn't respect women in Nigeria, you may need to reconsider that stance. And if you can't see yourself having a woman above you or respecting women, then better stay in Nigeria.



Next tip: All you old men that have spent 20 years following Akata and are now looking for unmarriedd younger girls in Nigeria who you want to turn into RNs and use her as your ATM, believing that she is a "good girl" and that she will be a good obedient wife, who will be at your beck and call.

You guys are looking for to go to an early grave and lose everything you have worked for since the 20 years you've been in Yankee. I implore you, please stop doing that nonsense.

There is nothing like a humble Nigerian girl. The ones that appear humble are just broke. The day money enters her hand is the day you will know her true colors. Now in US, you will find an elderly guy in his late 40s or 50s. They came to US in their 20s and hustled Akata for paper, and thereafter became legal. Instead of going to school, gain an education, and improve their standard of living, they take up security guard jobs, CNA jobs, and taxi driver jobs. They spend gruelling years doing these low paying jobs and saving pennies to eventually go to Nigeria and do big wedding and marry a small naive village girl, thinking that they are investing in her so that she will yield fruits and serve him in his old age.

Notice that Nigerian men are always looking for women to serve them cheesy

Well, these small naive girls come to US, go to nursing school, become LVNs or RNs. They then begin to make lots of money and they will begin to open eye grin

Lefulefu come and back me up here.


Those small, naive, village girls suddenly begin making about $3500 or more every 2 weeks. Back in Nigeria, they weren't even making 3500 naira every month. This kind of money blows their minds and they don't even know how to spend it anymore. The man who is her husband and invested in her now wants to control the money and keep her in a subservient position.

At that point in time, that is when the girls father in the village knows that he wants to receive chieftaincy title. Also that is the time the mother knows that she wants to become Lolo of NdiOhia. . That is also when the girls brother wants to open spare parts shop in Alaba. That is the time when the girls sister wants to get married. The entire family of the girl begins to pester her for money. Also at this same time, the girls husband wants to start to build block of flats in Nnewi. Also he feels that he is old enough to receive chieftaincy title in his village as well. All these things costs lots of money.

The pressure on the poor girls starts mounting. She has one or two kids at this point but she starts to work extra hours and overtime at work. Putting in a lot of exhausting energy into trying to fulfil the dreams of everyone. Instead of the husband to understand, he is not sympathetic to her. After all she is his investment and she better yield fruits. She begins to burn out slowly but surely. She needs support at home but the husband expects her to work for 12 to 13 hours, come home, prepare eba and ogbono soup for him, take care of the kids, and then open toto for him to Bleep cheesy. Tomorrow again it is back to the same routine up to 7 days a week.

One day all the pressure gets too much and then the bubble pops. The woman, under intense financial pressure from her extended family coupled with her unsupportive husband and work-family life, crumbles under it all. And what usually kicks it off? Money of course. Or the lack thereof.

The man, wanting to control the finances of the woman, starts a quarrel about how much he invested to bring her to America. Because of all the stress upon the woman and women being very emotional creatures, she snaps. She insults the husband with the greatest insult of his life. She neglects all he has done and acts on emotion. The man too, unable to stomach the insult, verbally and physically attacks the woman.

Now it always ends in 2 ways. If the woman is still alive after the physical attack, she calls the police and they arrest him for domestic violence. She files a restraining order against him and he cannot return back to the house he bought and the home he built.

The second way it ends is that the man attacks his wife and kills her with his security guard job service pistol or he strangles or stabs her to death with a kitchen knife.

In both cases, the police arrive and arrest the man. And then the family breaks up and most times can not be rebuilt anymore. It becomes a broken home with shatters dreams.

topsquino:
My account number to a woman who is likely to leave your ass when you are financially handicapped ? Can't believe a man with BALLS typed this. Chai.. Simping has reached another level.

dangoteinlaw:
then look at the ones that married whites lot of them are living happily eg Dr DRe, even snoopdogg never married at all but had kids with black ladies, that further confirms the op ascension that black ladies are toxic. These rappers above where alpha males who knew their way around women and at the end got a better deal. Although some whites weren't that lucky eg Jeff benzos

Skmoda360:
Japa things.....I no fit dey yankee make I leave whitey dey follow naija women make dem koba my life....


I will work my ass out and date a white girl capiche.

KenModi:
I sure you neva date dem before. No worry by the time white girls finish with you, you would be thankful if you can even restart your life in Lagos.

KenModi:
I sure you neva date dem before. No worry by the time white girls finish with you, you would be thankful if you can even restart your life in Lagos.

lefulefu:
lol its better yu just marry the devil u know than to be going back to naija looking for a bride.many yankee based naija guys who went home looking for homebase wife to bring to US have sorry tales to tell.if u still insist on marrying homebase just marry her and keep her in nigeria and be sending monthly upkeep then visit her during easter and christmas....but there chances she will codedly have a lover while u over there cos she go need man to warm her bed during the cold lonely nights.

byrron:
There is always a solution to every problem.

If you are legal here in united states and a single Male, whenever you want to marry just get every party sign a prenup and that solves the whole future drama of taking advantage of the US legal system especially the lady's in other to make a man miserable.

Any lady not willing to sign a prenup especially the one here in America can move on while you move on as well and if you are going back to Nigeria to pick a spouse, get them to sign a prenup since most of them are just desperate to leave the shores of Nigeria and are ready to sign any damn paper you present before them to sign even without knowing what they are signing for.

Once you have a prenup, then be rest assured that your wife will be on her best behavior except if you are just an ass of which she has every right to walk away from you because she deserves better.

Some men with prenups have also taken advantage of that to become grossly irresponsible.

Humility from both side's is the key.

Eniolakiite:
Yes. Both sides take advantage.

Thanks for that honesty.

Marriage has become transaction and competition for most people.

No love, affection, compassion or trust.

Maybe most people are better off being single.

byrron:
That's why marriage means nothing in America which is why the baby daddy and baby mama thing has become the norm and has replaced the marriage institution.

AfroKnight:
See, marriage is a lose-lose situation for any straight manly man in the US.

Two ways to be happily married as a man.
1. Be lucky to find a good wife. ( Good luck finding one)

2. Learn how to be happy with (and for) yourself regardless of good or bad energy from your wife. Derive your joy from your everyday small wins.

There’s one last option but it involves being a foôl
3. Be a simp.


Women have arm twisted that society to hand them the keys of the kingdom. Being masculine puts you at a disadvantage. You must take shît or they’ll grind your àss. It’s so bad that raising your own son to be a man is deemed toxic. But you’d see them applauding you if your little boy grew up to be a woman.

Hierarchy of importance in the American home:
1. Your children
2. Wife
3. Pets
4. Furniture
5. And finally You, the man.

tiptoe1:
Let me chip In a little. If you successfully get your papers and decide that you want to pick a girl from home, please and please you need to open your eyes and be careful cause it's also as deadly as getting married to an akata.

The western law have made husbands completely infim. You don't expect her to stay the same way and knowing laws in the Western world lets her own the house, the children and majority of the things you have. Many Nigerian wives realize their potentials once they get to tge US. Some of them do worse thing to their husband just to prove a point to their husband that they aren't in Nigeria where husbands has upper hands. So once their eyes tear, they over do it and torment their husbands with it.

wiseone28:
Hmm i see why almost 70% of people in America have been in a previous marriage or so..


At the end of the day na them dey sing love song pass

Eniolakiite:
Yea right..

Still it works out well for some tho.

byrron:
There is always a solution to every problem.

If you are legal here in united states and a single Male, whenever you want to marry just get every party sign a prenup and that solves the whole future drama of taking advantage of the US legal system especially the lady's in other to make a man miserable.

Any lady not willing to sign a prenup especially the one here in America can move on while you move on as well and if you are going back to Nigeria to pick a spouse, get them to sign a prenup since most of them are just desperate to leave the shores of Nigeria and are ready to sign any damn paper you present before them to sign even without knowing what they are signing for.

Once you have a prenup, then be rest assured that your wife will be on her best behavior except if you are just an ass of which she has every right to walk away from you because she deserves better.
Some men with prenups have also taken advantage of that to become grossly irresponsible.
Humility from both side's is the key.

byrron:
That's why marriage means nothing in America which is why the baby daddy and baby mama thing has become the norm and has replaced the marriage institution.

Jaqenhghar:
Its Oga
I am not holding you orcaskibg you to agree. Just pointing out some flaws in that opinion

armyofone:
Hmmmm
Not the right thing to do. Life is a game of chance. Bring her over, let her get the education and enlightenment that will help her hustle. Let your kids grow up with mom and dad. If the marriage turns sour, accept it as "life happens "
But don't just give up - humble yourself and do wip.

TIP: Teamwork and humility.

Kobojunkie:
You will find the same is true in Nigeria as well.

Kobojunkie:
You will find the same is true in Nigeria as well.