₦airaland Forum

Dnt remind him.A day to his coming,tell him u ve visitors or u r out of d state for a business deal dat u can pay for a hotel dat he will lounge.That hotel shld be far from where u r living.Dnt allow dat parasite into your house.

slyfox35:
Thanks for this,my thoughts exactly, but I do not know how to tell him to back off,should I remind of him of what he did?

slyfox35:
Best friends or closest friends as some people term it is quite normal in the life of 80% of world population, I had one too.

We grew up as teens together, matured as adults together, he came to our house always and ate all his meals with us. My mom was really nice to him when she was alive. He wore my clothes and never returned them. I did not ask because my parents always provided for me although they were average citizens.

Then the worst thing in my life happened. I lost both my parents within the space of four years.
Things turned downhill for me (orphans do suffer a lot.. Too much suffering for you to believe there is even God in heaven who takes care of the fatherless and motherless).

My friend travelled to an African country. He kept telling me to come over there to work that things are better there. I kept declining but after a year of constant pressure, I decided to man up, packed my bags and travelled to meet him.

Guess what? I did not stay up to 5 days with him!!!

His attitude changed by the second day, he yells at me at every given opportunity, from his best friend, I turned to his boy, the heat he was given me was so bad that when he leaves the house and he comes back, I get scared just by hearing his footsteps. I virtually turned to a nonentity to him. I had no money on me because the little I had left, he collected it when I arrived. I knew no one, I felt so miserable and alone and I started regretting why I left Nigeria.

On the fifth day ,I woke up early in the morning and shook him up. I don’t know what got into me (but I am glad it did), I told him I can’t stay with him anymore and I want to leave. He did not even feel bad about this, he did not think of the fact that I know nothing and nowhere in this country. He let me go.

I packed my bag amid tears and went into the street. Mind you, I had no one to call back in Nigeria... It was tough on me but as a naija guy and as God will have it, I did not spend even a night on the streets. I was shocked that a total stranger took me in, clothed and fed me. He taught me everything he knows. I worked for 6 months and was able to make 2 million Naira. This was like a dream to me (If you get money ehn, to praise God Dey sweet o)

I came back to Nigeria, rented an apartment, furnished it and continued working from here.

This so called best friend of mine saw my posts and pictures on Facebook and video called me to check on me (I guess his eyes did not believe what he was seeing) he asked me if I am in a hotel, I said no, I am in my apartment. He was shocked (me I nor keep any grudge against you) he told me he was coming to Nigeria and that I should please forgive him and forget everything that happened. I told him I can forgive but can’t forget.

What surprised me most are this exact words he said “my guy, if I come, na your house I go relax first abeg”

Now my fellow Nairalanders, I am asking, how should I go about this?

I have forgiven him but should I allow him into my home?

he is coming to kill you, trust me.

he has never been ur friend, he was envious of what u had as teenagers that's why he never returned any of wat he took from you. he invited u outside the country to mess u up but your God proved him wrong.

now he wants to come and relax in your place and you are even considering it? RIP in advance if u do so. I like d response u gave his, you have forgiven but have not forgotten. keep it that way

cococandy:
Please don’t let him stay in your house.
You have forgiven him but be wise.

He’s clearly jealous. He’s coming to your house to see things for himself. You can’t predict what he will do after that.

I totally agree!

Slyfox35, OP don't do it at all. That's like telling God, he should take your brain, life, and fortune because you don't need it.

You do need them, so don't accept. Block that dude if you must, bro. Seriously!

slyfox35:
See you wey get name “Octopussy”
Must I specify everything in my writeup?
You understand abi you nor understand

Please don't take him back let that friendship thing be from a distance i'm speaking from experience mine was both friends and family members when I had everything i ever wanted i helped those i could but just a little mistake i did everyone turn their back on me i left 200k with my brother aside other money i had him kept for me he ate them all and took me to police station he lie so many things i would have been taken to court if not for my dad who stood his grounds said he is the father and his daughter is not going anywhere i left they made me take the decision i never wanted to take in life just only one step remaining for me now i'm just waiting for this lockdown to be over so the creator will finish what he started in my life and as for my father i must surprise him with a car before this year runs out and I've vow to take care of him in every way even when I get married i can't believe i actually cried when typing this

I think he is a user. If you were poor and your Facebook pics shows hardship, he wouldn't contact you.

Just tell him to forget about it.

slyfox35:
Your stupidity seems hereditary,I won’t bother my time on you,if your life is vague and unbelievable,some people experiences are not,my story is vague? Then I have to lie about my parents death?
I should probably tell you the color of clothes I wore on that fateful day too and also the food I ate at the stranger house,no no...I should tell you the color of the gate opposite the house I stayed in over there too
I only asked for advice,if you have none in that empty skull of yours,then shut up and stop being a fool on Nairaland

If you can man up to that your guy like this i guess you wouldn't have to come here. Dude if you would listen,do not allow that dude near you.it would end in tears. If you do not hid to this..hmmm.Just think about how he treated you...Damn...i can't be this soft hearted ..Hell no

Babyforever:
Please don't take him back let that friendship thing be from a distance i'm speaking from experience mine was both friends and family members when I had everything i ever wanted i helped those i could but just a little mistake i did everyone turn their back on me i left 200k with my brother aside other money i had him kept for me he ate them all and took me to police station he lie so many things i would have been taken to court if not for my dad who stood him ground said he is the father and his daughter is not going anywhere i let they made me take the decision i never wanted to take in life just only one step remaining for me now i'm just waiting for this lockdown to be over so the creator will finish what he started in my life and as for my father i must surprise him with a car before this year runs out and I've vow to take care of him in every way even when I get married i can't believe i actually cried when typing this

I understand the feeling. I am sorry for what you experienced and happy you are rising above it!

Good goals. God help you make it happen!

If you let him into your house then you are a big fat slowpoke. You can talk and greet outside. I repeat don't let him come to your house. Don't even pick his call. I no fit hold grudges but I cut you off, it's as simple as that.

Separate thyself from him completely and avoid him if you love yourself. Be responsible for who comes into your life, not many people are graced to see the wickedness in the heart of those they call friends, but when one like you sees such, it saves you from a more greater danger in the future, which is why you must not allow him into your house. Be blunt if need be and block him. Forgive but don't get close. One last thing, stop showcasing your progress on Facebook, it's problem you're creating for yourself. That guy is jealous and His capable of anything, please DO NOT LET HIM IN. BE WISE!

cococandy:
Please don’t let him stay in your house.
You have forgiven him but be wise.

He’s clearly jealous. He’s coming to your house to see things for himself. You can’t predict what he will do after that.

I totally agree with him. Imagine you wer poor, will he reach out to you. You can forgive him but never, I repeat never allow him into your life again. Move on with life. God bless you.

berbs:
Abeg, no host am for your house oooo. Instead, pay for his hotel bills and pretend to be out of town. The dude is an enemy of progress.

He owes no man anything. Why pay his hotel bill. He should simply tell the dude that he is not available to or he is very occupied at the time.

slyfox35:
Thanks for this,my thoughts exactly, but I do not know how to tell him to back off,should I remind of him of what he did?

Tell him not to come. You can't host him. But if you are too weak, go ahead. People like you were meant to be eaten by the strong-minded.

To me, he is somebody that you should never worry what they think of you, you should never stress over their opinion about you.

U will b stupid if u allow him stay

I've been there!...
With a friend like that,
one does not need an enemy.
#I forgive the sin & forget the person.
#personal principle

He will kill you in the end

slyfox35:
Best friends or closest friends as some people term it is quite normal in the life of 80% of world population, I had one too.

We grew up as teens together, matured as adults together, he came to our house always and ate all his meals with us. My mom was really nice to him when she was alive. He wore my clothes and never returned them. I did not ask because my parents always provided for me although they were average citizens.

Then the worst thing in my life happened. I lost both my parents within the space of four years.
Things turned downhill for me (orphans do suffer a lot.. Too much suffering for you to believe there is even God in heaven who takes care of the fatherless and motherless).

My friend travelled to an African country. He kept telling me to come over there to work that things are better there. I kept declining but after a year of constant pressure, I decided to man up, packed my bags and travelled to meet him.

Guess what? I did not stay up to 5 days with him!!!

His attitude changed by the second day, he yells at me at every given opportunity, from his best friend, I turned to his boy, the heat he was given me was so bad that when he leaves the house and he comes back, I get scared just by hearing his footsteps. I virtually turned to a nonentity to him. I had no money on me because the little I had left, he collected it when I arrived. I knew no one, I felt so miserable and alone and I started regretting why I left Nigeria.

On the fifth day ,I woke up early in the morning and shook him up. I don’t know what got into me (but I am glad it did), I told him I can’t stay with him anymore and I want to leave. He did not even feel bad about this, he did not think of the fact that I know nothing and nowhere in this country. He let me go.

I packed my bag amid tears and went into the street. Mind you, I had no one to call back in Nigeria... It was tough on me but as a naija guy and as God will have it, I did not spend even a night on the streets. I was shocked that a total stranger took me in, clothed and fed me. He taught me everything he knows. I worked for 6 months and was able to make 2 million Naira. This was like a dream to me (If you get money ehn, to praise God Dey sweet o)

I came back to Nigeria, rented an apartment, furnished it and continued working from here.

This so called best friend of mine saw my posts and pictures on Facebook and video called me to check on me (I guess his eyes did not believe what he was seeing) he asked me if I am in a hotel, I said no, I am in my apartment. He was shocked (me I nor keep any grudge against you) he told me he was coming to Nigeria and that I should please forgive him and forget everything that happened. I told him I can forgive but can’t forget.

What surprised me most are this exact words he said “my guy, if I come, na your house I go relax first abeg”

Now my fellow Nairalanders, I am asking, how should I go about this?

I have forgiven him but should I allow him into my home?

Forgive & forget but don’t make financial sacrifices that is not convenient for you to him & don’t go the extra mile to please him

Twenty boys cannot play together for twenty years, your days of togetherness are over. Move on without him, that is the way life is. Build new positive relationships that will help your business to prosper. Wish you all the best.

slyfox35:
Best friends or closest friends as some people term it is quite normal in the life of 80% of world population, I had one too.

We grew up as teens together, matured as adults together, he came to our house always and ate all his meals with us. My mom was really nice to him when she was alive. He wore my clothes and never returned them. I did not ask because my parents always provided for me although they were average citizens.

Then the worst thing in my life happened. I lost both my parents within the space of four years.
Things turned downhill for me (orphans do suffer a lot.. Too much suffering for you to believe there is even God in heaven who takes care of the fatherless and motherless).

My friend travelled to an African country. He kept telling me to come over there to work that things are better there. I kept declining but after a year of constant pressure, I decided to man up, packed my bags and travelled to meet him.

Guess what? I did not stay up to 5 days with him!!!

His attitude changed by the second day, he yells at me at every given opportunity, from his best friend, I turned to his boy, the heat he was given me was so bad that when he leaves the house and he comes back, I get scared just by hearing his footsteps. I virtually turned to a nonentity to him. I had no money on me because the little I had left, he collected it when I arrived. I knew no one, I felt so miserable and alone and I started regretting why I left Nigeria.

On the fifth day ,I woke up early in the morning and shook him up. I don’t know what got into me (but I am glad it did), I told him I can’t stay with him anymore and I want to leave. He did not even feel bad about this, he did not think of the fact that I know nothing and nowhere in this country. He let me go.

I packed my bag amid tears and went into the street. Mind you, I had no one to call back in Nigeria... It was tough on me but as a naija guy and as God will have it, I did not spend even a night on the streets. I was shocked that a total stranger took me in, clothed and fed me. He taught me everything he knows. I worked for 6 months and was able to make 2 million Naira. This was like a dream to me (If you get money ehn, to praise God Dey sweet o)

I came back to Nigeria, rented an apartment, furnished it and continued working from here.

This so called best friend of mine saw my posts and pictures on Facebook and video called me to check on me (I guess his eyes did not believe what he was seeing) he asked me if I am in a hotel, I said no, I am in my apartment. He was shocked (me I nor keep any grudge against you) he told me he was coming to Nigeria and that I should please forgive him and forget everything that happened. I told him I can forgive but can’t forget.

What surprised me most are this exact words he said “my guy, if I come, na your house I go relax first abeg”

Now my fellow Nairalanders, I am asking, how should I go about this?

I have forgiven him but should I allow him into my home?

That's not a friend but a snake you mistake for a friend.
Tell am make h given you space.

It only took hardshop do yiur friend to reveal who he he truly is.

Guy man, you can help , but don't make that mistake a second time of letting him.com close to you.

rs172:
Yea... you can contact his best friend for his own side of the story too..

Ur can share his details …..

my dear no try am unless u dey cress

slyfox35:
Best friends or closest friends as some people term it is quite normal in the life of 80% of world population, I had one too.

We grew up as teens together, matured as adults together, he came to our house always and ate all his meals with us. My mom was really nice to him when she was alive. He wore my clothes and never returned them. I did not ask because my parents always provided for me although they were average citizens.

Then the worst thing in my life happened. I lost both my parents within the space of four years.
Things turned downhill for me (orphans do suffer a lot.. Too much suffering for you to believe there is even God in heaven who takes care of the fatherless and motherless).

My friend travelled to an African country. He kept telling me to come over there to work that things are better there. I kept declining but after a year of constant pressure, I decided to man up, packed my bags and travelled to meet him.

Guess what? I did not stay up to 5 days with him!!!

His attitude changed by the second day, he yells at me at every given opportunity, from his best friend, I turned to his boy, the heat he was given me was so bad that when he leaves the house and he comes back, I get scared just by hearing his footsteps. I virtually turned to a nonentity to him. I had no money on me because the little I had left, he collected it when I arrived. I knew no one, I felt so miserable and alone and I started regretting why I left Nigeria.

On the fifth day ,I woke up early in the morning and shook him up. I don’t know what got into me (but I am glad it did), I told him I can’t stay with him anymore and I want to leave. He did not even feel bad about this, he did not think of the fact that I know nothing and nowhere in this country. He let me go.

I packed my bag amid tears and went into the street. Mind you, I had no one to call back in Nigeria... It was tough on me but as a naija guy and as God will have it, I did not spend even a night on the streets. I was shocked that a total stranger took me in, clothed and fed me. He taught me everything he knows. I worked for 6 months and was able to make 2 million Naira. This was like a dream to me (If you get money ehn, to praise God Dey sweet o)

I came back to Nigeria, rented an apartment, furnished it and continued working from here.

This so called best friend of mine saw my posts and pictures on Facebook and video called me to check on me (I guess his eyes did not believe what he was seeing) he asked me if I am in a hotel, I said no, I am in my apartment. He was shocked (me I nor keep any grudge against you) he told me he was coming to Nigeria and that I should please forgive him and forget everything that happened. I told him I can forgive but can’t forget.

What surprised me most are this exact words he said “my guy, if I come, na your house I go relax first abeg”

Now my fellow Nairalanders, I am asking, how should I go about this?

I have forgiven him but should I allow him into my home?

Nope.
He should rent a hotel and meet you in a neutral place
For someone to resent you for that long since his childhood then you keep him at ar,ms length
You dont need the same friends you had since childhood.

Never ever travel to a new place without a backup. Never.

Have some money somewhere, not cash. Preferably in an account with a virtual credit or debit card. You go appreciate am later

Op, as I've stated herein b4, since u've forgiven him, good and godly for those who offended us. What he is coming to ur place to do is to spy on you to know the secret of your success and to nail you or set u up that could lead to ur downfall. The greatest mistake you do is to show him ur house where you stay. Even ur dead perants will not forgive u from thier graves.

Do this. Hide ur place of stay, the business u do and act as if na ur friend's house u dey stay and the guy is not accommodating. That na money u dey look for to get a place a place of ur own. If he arrives Nigeria, help him get hotel nd pay 4 one night, far away from where u stay maybe another city outside ur state. Towards night, leave and tell him u see him next day. Never come back to pay. If he calls u on phone the next day, tell him u are out of town and don't know u gonna be back. Let him sort himself out. Never

slyfox35:
Best friends or closest friends as some people term it is quite normal in the life of 80% of world population, I had one too.

We grew up as teens together, matured as adults together, he came to our house always and ate all his meals with us. My mom was really nice to him when she was alive. He wore my clothes and never returned them. I did not ask because my parents always provided for me although they were average citizens.

Then the worst thing in my life happened. I lost both my parents within the space of four years.
Things turned downhill for me (orphans do suffer a lot.. Too much suffering for you to believe there is even God in heaven who takes care of the fatherless and motherless).

My friend travelled to an African country. He kept telling me to come over there to work that things are better there. I kept declining but after a year of constant pressure, I decided to man up, packed my bags and travelled to meet him.

Guess what? I did not stay up to 5 days with him!!!

His attitude changed by the second day, he yells at me at every given opportunity, from his best friend, I turned to his boy, the heat he was given me was so bad that when he leaves the house and he comes back, I get scared just by hearing his footsteps. I virtually turned to a nonentity to him. I had no money on me because the little I had left, he collected it when I arrived. I knew no one, I felt so miserable and alone and I started regretting why I left Nigeria.

On the fifth day ,I woke up early in the morning and shook him up. I don’t know what got into me (but I am glad it did), I told him I can’t stay with him anymore and I want to leave. He did not even feel bad about this, he did not think of the fact that I know nothing and nowhere in this country. He let me go.

I packed my bag amid tears and went into the street. Mind you, I had no one to call back in Nigeria... It was tough on me but as a naija guy and as God will have it, I did not spend even a night on the streets. I was shocked that a total stranger took me in, clothed and fed me. He taught me everything he knows. I worked for 6 months and was able to make 2 million Naira. This was like a dream to me (If you get money ehn, to praise God Dey sweet o)

I came back to Nigeria, rented an apartment, furnished it and continued working from here.

This so called best friend of mine saw my posts and pictures on Facebook and video called me to check on me (I guess his eyes did not believe what he was seeing) he asked me if I am in a hotel, I said no, I am in my apartment. He was shocked (me I nor keep any grudge against you) he told me he was coming to Nigeria and that I should please forgive him and forget everything that happened. I told him I can forgive but can’t forget.

What surprised me most are this exact words he said “my guy, if I come, na your house I go relax first abeg”

Now my fellow Nairalanders, I am asking, how should I go about this?

I have forgiven him but should I allow him into my home?

You can get a place for him, but don't stay together, he has ulterior motive. He probably want to finish what he couldn't do you in the foreign land.

MrBigiman:
No. All my attempt at best friends failed. Short story

I was always first in secondary school, and at worst 3rd position, and my so called best friend was jealous of me. When my JSCE results came out my own best friend told me I failed woefully, when I had in fact picked all As. That was the end of our friendship.

In the University, I had a set back. My best friend started working before me. When i discovered he was serving close to where i lived i buzzed him up to check on him, probably he could dash me some change. He totally blanked me, and never sort anyway to see me for a whole year. Probably because he was now successful. But we were like brothers before the fame.

I have learnt the hard way that people don't necessarily take us the way we take them. And that it's best to forge on in life without grudges, but keep a safe distance from having any emotional attachment with any man.

A chap stayed with me without paying rent. He was processing IELTs to travel, but I didnt know, which is no problem at all. He ate my food, slept on my bed, and did his graduation party at my place without paying a single rent. He even did his graduation party in my house. He served and travelled out, only reaching out to me once. He then changed numbers and I never could reach him. When I saw his post on FB, I left a comment for him to inbox me his number but he never did, probably because he was abroad and i will be a liability.

Life continues

Bigiman

Wow. So sorry you had to go through all that. Anyways, it's all good. I'm here for you bro.

eyinjuege:
You can allow him stay with you, but before he comes find out how long he plans to stay, and let him know he cannot exceed that time.
Meanwhile, I will advice you to keep your source of income to yourself and not share with him even if he asks. I say this because he may as well sabotage you.
I'm not sure about his intentions towards you.

Op...don't try this.
That guy fit strangle You in the night....
A word is enough....

People like op still dey exist for this country??
Mr Op, you will surely learn the hard way. Don’t even get why u’re chatting with him in the first place?

Like i said earlier, you will surely learn the hard way!!!

Such a person wont hesitate to put juju in your apartment
Reminds me of my roommate in University
The bobo was scotting with me all tru, I didnt even mind only for us to graduate for us to be looking for jobs. Yeah times were hard for all of us but this dude called me one day and told me that his parents said we his friends were the ones holding him spiritually from succeeding in life (imagine)
I hung the call and we didn't talk for about 3yrs
One day out of the blue, he called and told me he was coming to my local government for a job and he would like to spend the night in my crib.
Omo i declined o
Come see as baba take offence
Like say we rent apartment together
Then I knew there was more to his coming over

Thanks for this,my thoughts exactly, but I do not know how to tell him to back off,should I remind of him of what he did

Diplomacy is a way of asking the devil to go to hell with him looking forward to taking the trip.

Bruv!...do not let that motherfucker come around you,he is a fair weather friend and will stab you all over again.

Enough has been said


OP flee from him



He ain't worth it.


Your fleeing from him is normal as a human being

A home is a special place you don't just allow anyone in and out. This guy has no reason to maltreat you but he did. Guard your space, don't contaminate it. Love him from afar

Where's the picture of the 2 million in your Akant? if you made that amount why did you return? una sabi lie