Why am I the only one thinking the guy should go ahead?

Marriage for that woman would mean detaching forever from her late husband lineage and name. And I suppose she cherish the husband's memory and the son but she needs that babies especially a girl from her blood to keep her active and lively

But then, I am an amoral Christian, Nigerians don't understand me

ITbomb:
Why am I the only one thinking the guy should go ahead?

Marriage for that woman would mean detaching forever from her late husband lineage and name. And I suppose she cherish the husband's memory and the son but she needs that babies especially a girl from her blood to keep her active and lively

But then, I am an amoral Christian, Nigerians don't understand me

who told you i and some other good contributors have told the man to go ahead with the same reasons as you. have you not been following the treads and contributors and my imput.

Modesthy:

Her real intention I'm very sure is for procreation. She is not financially capable of doing ivf.

Of course it is for PROCREATION not for gratification.

Modesthy:

Yes my uncle suffered sickness for some years before his death. May that was the reason. Whose fault it was I don't really know because I didn't discuss anything like that with any of them.

In as the wife has brought up the issue,you have to ask her why she did not have other children all these interval of 12 years. Which is very very strange for an African. am sure that only son was pampered and treated like an egg.how sad the boy lost his father at such childhood. you own it an obligation to take care of that boy and also ensure he gets brothers and sisters too. so he cannot be robbed of life because he lost his father due to no fault of his.

Modesthy:
I had a good uncle who passed away three years ago. His wife morned him for one year. I lived with that my uncle until I got married and parked to my own house.

I use to visit the house sometimes. After the mourning, his wife called me and told me that I should give her more children. She has only one male child. I refused. But She said I should do it for her because she doesn't want children outside the family because she loved my uncle and our family and that she can't continue to stay with only one child.

I'm completely confused. First I'm married doing that is infidelity, sencondly, the uncle was like a father to me before his death. And I see it as a big sin.

Please somebody should help me, what do I do here? How do I handle this issue? Thanks for your candid advice.

If you must do this request, involve the elders, at least 3 older men in your family to discuss on this issue and get their acceptance. Tell them what she said, tell them you're interested and let them decide if you're the right man for the job or not.

If you jump over them and do this, you'll be committing a lot of atrocities. First of, her sleeping with a married man is wrong. Second, your child with her won't be seen as your uncle's, which should be the intent behind her request, but as your child and that is adultery; more like betrayal to your uncle.

Whatever you're being advised here must only be done after you get the go-ahead to impregnate her cause even in the olden days, a man was chosen by the elders to impregnate a widow to continue the family's lineage, he didn't do it of his own volition. That's tradition. Follow it.

femi4:
The laws kills, it doesn't give life. On the Sabbath, Christ heal the sick. The law doesn't preach forgiveness if caught in adultery , Christ forgave the women caught in very act.

Our forefathers followed the law by slaughtering ram to make sacrifices to God but we as Christians don't need that again.

Abraham served God under the law. He was righteous and a servant of God. The word "Christian" was first associated with the people the followed Christ in the book of Act.

Act 11:26
And when he had found him, he brought him unto Antioch. And it came to pass that for a whole year they assembled themselves with the church, and taught many people. And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.



But we cant serve God in this dispensation using the law. We followed the precepts of Christ hence the name "Christian"

the issue is what does is it make the ancients if not followers of God cos they believed in christ and followed the law given to them?
Cos from all indications in the scripture they served God according to the law given to them(a schoolmaster)looking forward to christ and it was accounted unto them for righteousness.
What then do you call the ancients if not Christians?

Ohizman73:
I never insisted that in your place people force people on people.already the proper advice has been given . We are not also forcing the woman on you.you have also hit the nail on the head that it's like your uncle was sick before he died sort of having fertility problems. You ask the wife what was the reason why she could not have another child when your uncle was alive. Of course you know the answer.and of course it is crystal clear that it her condition that has descended to her stooping low to make such request.if your brother was alive and she made such request it becomes a sin. Then as he's dead you never had interest or wanted to convert your brothers pty to yours.from these tread a majority have given the same advice as mine. Already some people are making mockery of her predicament and yours. And starting to toe another line bringing up religious sentiments and insuring these trying to offer you proper advice.your uncles family welfare lie in ur hands after his death.you spoke well of him and his wife.it is really unfortunate.we don't pray for any bad misfortune what if that his only son dies.did any body foresee your uncle would die at his prime.i think I have done my best in advice. Lastly what tribe is ur uncles wife and what tribe is your wife. Did the family not partake in the burial of ur uncle. what was the elders decision on their brothers wife and his interests. That aspect is compulsory in ibo land.you made mention that she did a sort of traditional mourning ceremony for her late dad.i know how you feel with the claim that ur uncle was like a father to you and the woman like a mother.what is paining me is that it seems no mature female has contributed to this tread. I wish you the best and good luck

You have said well and I'm grateful dear. But please how do u see in Christianity perspective? I'm a kind of a person who believe in heaven and hell. But I have tried to find scripture that's for or against the act but couldn't. That's I take to this forum. I don't want to meet my religious leaders over the issue. I'm looking forward to to your response.

Modesthy:

You have said well and I'm grateful dear. But please how do u see in Christianity perspective? I'm a kind of a person who believe in heaven and hell. But I have tried to find scripture that's for or against the act but couldn't. That's I take to this forum. I don't want to meet my religious leaders over the issue. I'm looking forward to to your response.

Your predicament and your uncles wife is very unfourtunate such painfulcircumstances. am a xtian like yourself ,i look up to my bible for spiritual guidance and would try to conote to doing according to such ascribed. the issue of religion is sensitive because of the way people have distorted it. Already on this tread some religious sentiments came up. i as a xtian quickly aired my view as my contributor was trying to claim awareness.I was happy some other contributor took it up. as i was not even ready to start a baseless arguement when a serious and controversial issue was at stake. even in what we see in the bible are the traditions of the middle east(Palestine) on marriage,inheritance and all aspects of life.Which we now claim are xtian acts.There has always been some absurb arguments as the bible is against women wearing trousers as they are mens clothing bla bla bla. Somebody even brought the issue of God striking one of somebody dead because he refused to refused to impregnate his late brothers widowed wife in other to continue the family lineage as was their custom not a sin. i can reference if he was married with his own family. somebody incounter reaction brought another version up.an arguement ensured that is why i dont like harboring religious sentiments.What i would say is we should just pray to God for not to fall into such predicament .Do you took ifsomebody told your uncles wife in a lifetime that she would stoop so low to shed her dignity to approach you on such request she would ever believe.take the issue of Ruth in the Bible and the story. What i would say is that God knows your mind you never lusted after your uncles wife ,just as she also never lusted after you. She is all an epitone of a righteous woman to have endured and stood by your uncle till he died. despite his infertility problem.So much emotions on ground as shes widowed with no companion but just one child.Even if you give her all the money in the world to marry a billionare she would NOT even in the name of another child. as she would see it as a betrayal of ur uncle and her dignity.if that ur uncles wife had up to two more children and ur brother now died.do you think she would think of that matter and not resign herself to fate and work towards giving them the best in life. And moreover never marry not to talk of another man crossing her legs till she dies.Ave said my best how i wish i could speak to you on phone or whatever medium to really counsel you. but with i have said you are a man.the onus lies with you,youare not my family. the life of the family of your late uncle is in your hands.SO HIS WIFE.

Modesthy:

Nobody forces anybody on a woman in my place. The advice I need is just based on conscience because I use to see the woman as somehow a mother and my uncle as a father. And moreso I'm a Christian. These were the reason I objected. But she keep telling me that I should think about her condition of having only one child.

For a woman whom you see as a mom to make this kind of request of you means she has given it a lot of thought. Chances are, she might have consulted one or two elders discretely.

Ohizman73:
the other question I have asked you that you have refused to answer is what happened that ur uncles wife did not have any other child between the 12 year interval that she had ur uncles only child . Is it that ur uncle had infertility problems. For now to make this request shows some light that she is fertile all along even nearing menopause.

You are asking him question as if he is God that give children

Saintmary:

For a woman whom you see as a mom to make this kind of request of you means she has given it a lot of thought. Chances are, she might have consulted one or two elders discretely.

I think her mum is involved in this her decision.

Do sperm donation for her at a fertility clinic.

Lionessza6:
Don't complicate your life,respect your wife & your marriage, and you shall have peace of mind. What she is suggesting does happen in some cultures, but the woman usually talks to the elders 1st,and they are the ones that will recommend her the right* sperm donor in the family. What she is doing is creepy,sneaky and suspicious. One is left to think she was lusting over you all this while,& your uncle was a deterrent . Maybe she wants a younger man to awaken her senses ,and her need for another child is just an excuse to lure you into her web of deceit. Becareful with such people.

Dear Op, listen to this and flee from that woman, she wants to destroy your famiky and marriage. She is a widow and free to remarry, dnt create a problem that you and your generation will never recover from. After havinv a son it is upkeep, next u have two homes and two wives with children that will grow up to hate you and their step siblings.

Pls for the sake of your wife n children ,avoid her pls tell all this story to your wife you will be amazed at how she will settle this matter ,be wise and ask yourself how will your uncle feel after all he did for u

One son for a dead man is enough, she's asking for her selfish lust

Creative writer of the week.

Whats the name of the home video.

Your egungun wanto enter express o

Na wa o.
You'll just make your life unnecessarily complex.

It's ungodly, don't do it, advise her to remarry

People go and dance with the devil thinking they are smart and wise, but at last the devil always I mean always wins..

what are you asking us again?

Shebi you said you "refused" kwo?

Modesthy:
I had a good uncle who passed away three years ago. His wife morned him for one year. I lived with that my uncle until I got married and parked to my own house.

I use to visit the house sometimes. After the mourning, his wife called me and told me that I should give her more children. She has only one male child. I refused. But She said I should do it for her because she doesn't want children outside the family because she loved my uncle and our family and that she can't continue to stay with only one child.

I'm completely confused. First I'm married doing that is infidelity, sencondly, the uncle was like a father to me before his death. And I see it as a big sin.

Please somebody should help me, what do I do here? How do I handle this issue? Thanks for your candid advice.

All you people claim to follow one Abrahamic religion or another but none of you heed the first lesson - women will lead you to hell.

Get away from that woman.

Modesthy:
I had a good uncle who passed away three years ago. His wife morned him for one year. I lived with that my uncle until I got married and parked to my own house.

I use to visit the house sometimes. After the mourning, his wife called me and told me that I should give her more children. She has only one male child. I refused. But She said I should do it for her because she doesn't want children outside the family because she loved my uncle and our family and that she can't continue to stay with only one child.

I'm completely confused. First I'm married doing that is infidelity, sencondly, the uncle was like a father to me before his death. And I see it as a big sin.

Please somebody should help me, what do I do here? How do I handle this issue? Thanks for your candid advice.

Just don't accede to her overtures for these 3 reasons I'm going to give you.

1. Even at his death, your uncle will never be happy with this (you over this)
2. You have your own wife and family, how does she feel if it happens?
3. Ask yourself, will my family receive this as honour if it eventually happens and they get to know about it. If you could not give affirmative answer, then stay off.

Truthfully speaking, this happens everywhere. It now depends on you, do you have any dignity you want to protect or not? To me, that will be a shameful act.

Even among soldiers there is 'Mercy killing'. It is legal and logical, my fear is how it may affect your innocent wife. It may turn to katakata if she finds out; yet, it is not easy to hide love for too long.

THIS IS HOW TO CRASH YOUR LIFE 101 run for your life ooo op

Is not advisable

for the sake of your wife and children please don't thread in that path.thank God she has a child for the family already let the family release her and go marry.

[s]

CoronaVirusRelo:
Whats the name of the home video.

[/s]

forget about her and concentrate on making money for her, yourself and your family ooo

And you can join me through my signature below for details

Lionessza6:
Don't complicate your life,respect your wife & your marriage, and you shall have peace of mind. What she is suggesting does happen in some cultures, but the woman usually talks to the elders 1st,and they are the ones that will recommend her the right* sperm donor in the family. What she is doing is creepy,sneaky and suspicious. One is left to think she was lusting over you all this while,& your uncle was a deterrent . Maybe she wants a younger man to awaken her senses ,and her need for another child is just an excuse to lure you into her web of deceit. Becareful with such people.

She might want him to take care of financial needs too

The fact you are wasting your talent surprises me. You will do better in life as a movie director