₦airaland Forum

madridguy:
" My only problem with this lady is that she and her family are so poor to the extent that they see me as their meal ticket, [/b]as if as am the best thing that ever happens to them."

[b]This part really touch me.

adewumiopeyemi:
Just look at me begging a girl of 30years to date me and she is doing yanga imagine ��

ravensckar:
Honestly, when I read one-sided write ups like these, I feel appalled. Ain't there two sides to a coin any more? The so-called 'desperation' from ladies may not always be what you think. It could be a way of saying their own mind is made up. They have no more time to waste.

Now, let me shock you with my own story. When I met the lady I'm married to today, she told me straight up that she's not in for any long term relationship. She's almost done with school and that if the relationship won't lead to marriage, I should jejely excuse her. Me being the 'guyman' that I was then, I wanted to chop and clean mouth. I sha played along with the intent to chop until I'm full. Now, therein lies my confusion; the said lady in question was everything I wanted in a woman (beautiful, educated, well behaved, God-fearing and highly industrious). But I have just one problem; I wasn't ready for marriage. Money no dey, even the job I was doing then, salary was around 70K.


She sha encouraged me that we should pull our resources together and that we'll survive. Long story cut short, I decided to give it a shot. After all, person wey dey ground no get anywhere to fall to. We got married in less than 4 months of dating. When I mean married, I mean a proper and elaborate wedding. Brethrens, today we're still together. Yes, she's not perfect just like I'm not as well, but we are still happily married.

It was later I understood the reason for her 'desperation'. She had wasted too much time dating some Bleep boys, hence, she felt she has no more time to waste. To her, if it's not going to lead to marriage, then, she shouldn't even venture into it. What we guys see as 'desperation' to some ladies, it's called making up their mind.

paulolee:
yup...she no wan use ear hear c.d or contraceptives, she buy pack of pregnancy test kits keep for her locker n they check herself praying it tests positive bt she didnt kno dt am serving a living GOD dt have a better plan for me....spent just a month with her and she de always like de ontop because she don tire 4 my Withdrawal tinz...me na sharp gee na, na when she don tire n come down naim i de always de cum outside d nunu...na me get gun n go decide wr and when to shoot am na.....one day she vex ask me say Y i do like discharging outside of her and I tell her say am nt ready for a child bt she said she just wana av a child (thinking it would lead to marriage) and said even if am not ready she go take Care of the child herself...told her to go look for another careless gee because i don de game since, no be today

gbengaoyeladun:
Girls ehn....naso this one told me in January that she dream that she will do her wedding this year...I was like not with me...she said is with you nah..and I said OK.....since then ehn.....I ran for my life.

sassysure:
What I'm reading here make it look like ladies are the only desperate ones.


Have u ever seen a desperate guy who want to marry a lady by fire by force?
He is that lady's everyday nightmare.
Sometimes, u have to involve the elders to stop him from harassing you.

The worst is that they are very manipulative.

If they happen to be from the same village with you, all worst.

They will try to manipulate your parents through their family and friends, when they see that your family is the struggling type, they will introduce money.
Some are so arrogant they will go straight to your people with their elders without consulting you or even proposing first not to talk of u accepting their proposal.

As a young maiden, I saw it all. Some came to my school, sometimes especially during Christmas when u go home, u will wonder if father Christmas visited your house.
Is it gifts, they don't take rejection easily.

I had lots of suitors. If they were 10( trust me, I got more than that), 7 were very shocked I said no, then 5 started aggressive wooing using all manner of manipulations.

Most babes around me experience the same thing. It's worst when you enter higher institution. Get admission to study medicine, pharmacy or nursing and they will break your father's gate. U will get call from abroad( both genuine and fake abroaders )tire.

Most well to do men from my tribe don't accept rejection easily. It is a knockout on his image and they have this huge ego. And if you are wooing a girl for marriage, most times, your peers and family are aware of that.
So its a kind of challange and a hurdle they must cross by any means possible. What ladies dont know is that when such men finally nail you, you are simply a trophy at that particular moment to be discarded for another one.
When you say no,mean it and move on.

sassysure:
What I'm reading here make it look like ladies are the only desperate ones.


Have u ever seen a desperate guy who want to marry a lady by fire by force?
He is that lady's everyday nightmare.
Sometimes, u have to involve the elders to stop him from harassing you.

The worst is that they are very manipulative.

If they happen to be from the same village with you, all worst.

They will try to manipulate your parents through their family and friends, when they see that your family is the struggling type, they will introduce money.
Some are so arrogant they will go straight to your people with their elders without consulting you or even proposing first not to talk of u accepting their proposal.

As a young maiden, I saw it all. Some came to my school, sometimes especially during Christmas when u go home, u will wonder if father Christmas visited your house.
Is it gifts, they don't take rejection easily.

I had lots of suitors. If they were 10( trust me, I got more than that), 7 were very shocked I said no, then 5 started aggressive wooing using all manner of manipulations.

Most babes around me experience the same thing. It's worst when you enter higher institution. Get admission to study medicine, pharmacy or nursing and they will break your father's gate. U will get call from abroad( both genuine and fake abroaders )tire.

Most well to do men from my tribe don't accept rejection easily. It is a knockout on his image and they have this huge ego. And if you are wooing a girl for marriage, most times, your peers and family are aware of that.
So its a kind of challange and a hurdle they must cross by any means possible. What ladies dont know is that when such men finally nail you, you are simply a trophy at that particular moment to be discarded for another one.
When you say no,mean it and move on.

JustforMen:
I sure did.

The best babe I have ever met till date. She loved me whole heartedly but she wanted to get married and I was still in school.
I had to let her go but I still respect her and honestly, I still love her.
She got married then and I am also married to someone else now but I still feel she should have been my life partner.
Unfortunately, I hear she is not happy in her marriage now. I wish there is a way I can make her life happy.

Move on already bro. Your parents didn’t have you because of her.

Respect your wife and stop brooding over what could have been and what didn’t be

Stop acting like a telemundo character

rowland545:
Lols...would have loved to share mine...but while we were dating I introduced her to nairaland...so I won't....b4 someone calls me now and starts to abuse me...but if she is reading this...u are a very nice girl and u need Patience in your life....


Breaking up with u was the best thing I did for myself...the pressure was too much...and lemme advice u...I don't think u will get married any time soon with that attitude.


I feel relieve a bit saying all this...because I don't think I can say it to her face...peace out

iamyemiakins:
Have you ever dated someone who desperately wanted to get married when you were not ready?



How was the experience?

Raydos:
Well I have no experience, But my Sister Is going through this right now, She was a Very pretty girl back then in School to the extent almost every guy want a piece of her, But she turned them all down!!

There was even one brilliant guy that really loved her so much that He even went as far as Writing Exam for her, Imagine taking that risk for a lady?? He doesn't even care if he get caught and get rusticated! He loved .y sister so much

But upon all these, My sister still turned him down, The reason For this is not farfetched, She was a very Pretty girl and she feel she can settle down anytime she want, She think guys will always want her cos of there pretty face!!

Fast forward to 7 years later, She's not Yet married now, Depression Has finished her, She couldn't celebrate her 34th birthday last year, instead she just Stay indoors and cry all day!!

I really feel bad seeing her cry, It moved me to tears, She's isn't as attractive As she was when she was 25!!

Raydos:
Well I have no experience, But my Sister Is going through this right now, She was a Very pretty girl back then in School to the extent almost every guy want a piece of her, But she turned them all down!!

There was even one brilliant guy that really loved her so much that He even went as far as Writing Exam for her, Imagine taking that risk for a lady?? He doesn't even care if he get caught and get rusticated! He loved .y sister so much

But upon all these, My sister still turned him down, The reason For this is not farfetched, She was a very Pretty girl and she feel she can settle down anytime she want, She think guys will always want her cos of there pretty face!!

Fast forward to 7 years later, She's not Yet married now, Depression Has finished her, She couldn't celebrate her 34th birthday last year, instead she just Stay indoors and cry all day!!

I really feel bad seeing her cry, It moved me to tears, She's isn't as attractive As she was when she was 25!!

Lamanii22:
Are girls that desperate to get married Girls! Y'all needa work harder and smarter, that guy will come for you....

sassysure:
U want to marry me
I am a married woman of course.

Just wanted to let you guys know it ain't easy on babes too. In dormitory, I was nicknamed one guys name because he couldn't give up. Till I went to uni.

He is one of my cousin's friend. Took my picture( don't know if its with his permission) from his house and enlarged. Hung in his sitting room.
When he finally got the message that I don't want to marry him, he went for another person. It was around Easter break and I came home from school, was jisting with a nebor when I saw a convoy of cars,asked and was told it's the guy. This guy still stopped, walked up to where me and the elderly woman were. Thank goodness for that woman. She deflected what would have hung me finally. I saw this guy with the wife drove pass me the next day, he stopped and came out to greet me. I have to involve the head of his family. I sneak in to my village towards late evening, use apiam way and enter my house through the backyard. Stay with my mum without coming out till I leave. All because of men. They will be at the compound with the elders and I will jump fence from the back and disappear straight to my mum's hometown.

Girls get it worst. They will ruin your reputation. They will go to beer parlour and make u the topic of discussion.
A babe almost blinded me with very long cane simply because her so called boyfriend wanted to marry me. His dad mandated him to marry me. Have never met the guy. Actually bypassed him on his way to my house to see me
He don't know me either. It wasn't easy for me at all. Some babes get guys who want to befriend them, I get suitors. Had few,very few guys who want to befriend me and all were outside my state.

Some will stalk you.

So when u guys are busy making it look like babes are all over you, know that your brothers are killing themselves over other women. They spent money, they can go to any length.

The way men aggressively pursued me actually had a very negative effect on me toward men cos it was suffocating and too clingy. Yeah, at a point my mummy got worried cos I never responded positively to any.

You want to know about what women pass through in the hands of men, u will never find it here, go to hair salon or campus and you will be shocked to see the level men( not boys) with money and class will go to have a babe answer his name.

elpochas:
divorced. She's back to Anambra single to stupor seeking my face... Some gals are really funny.imagine you correcting your Girl and her reply will be,do you know am a fine babe. my guy not all that glitters is gold.the most annoying thing is these gal made me leave my good girl then.Had to go back to my ex,just tank God my ex was still single and she acepted me back.

Raydos:
Well I have no experience, But my Sister Is going through this right now, She was a Very pretty girl back then in School to the extent almost every guy want a piece of her, But she turned them all down!!

There was even one brilliant guy that really loved her so much that He even went as far as Writing Exam for her, Imagine taking that risk for a lady?? He doesn't even care if he get caught and get rusticated! He loved .y sister so much

But upon all these, My sister still turned him down, The reason For this is not farfetched, She was a very Pretty girl and she feel she can settle down anytime she want, She think guys will always want her cos of there pretty face!!

Fast forward to 7 years later, She's not Yet married now, Depression Has finished her, She couldn't celebrate her 34th birthday last year, instead she just Stay indoors and cry all day!!

I really feel bad seeing her cry, It moved me to tears, She's isn't as attractive As she was when she was 25!!

bonnyhope:
All what you have said is Nollywood

Men look for those women that will give them peace of mind not those who studied medical courses as stated in ur script

rowland545:
Lols...would have loved to share mine...but while we were dating I introduced her to nairaland...so I won't....b4 someone calls me now and starts to abuse me...but if she is reading this...u are a very nice girl and u need Patience in your life....


Breaking up with u was the best thing I did for myself...the pressure was too much...and lemme advice u...I don't think u will get married any time soon with that attitude.


I feel relieve a bit saying all this...because I don't think I can say it to her face...peace out

AfroKnight:
Chai!

Your first born would have been another man’s child. Shît!!!

This is how men end up raising other people’s kids, only to find out the truth at the embassy.

She stayed in your home, ate your food, collected your money and gifts and still tried to trap you in a marriage with the child of another man.

That was cruel of her.

AfroKnight:
Chai!

Your first born would have been another man’s child. Shît!!!

This is how men end up raising other people’s kids, only to find out the truth at the embassy.

She stayed in your home, ate your food, collected your money and gifts and still tried to trap you in a marriage with the child of another man.

That was cruel of her.

Ulunne777:
First arrangee. Came back for Xmas and we finally met. He said if I agree before the end of the week we will marry. I refused, Oga wedded another woman end of the week. I marvel at women . You marry someone you are meeting for the first time in less than 3 days.

Validated:
You are ungrateful. Who told you that she will be eternally poor? God gave you a soul mate to lift that family. He knows ways and means you do not. Go and marry that woman otherwise the next bus top might be disastrous.

Blackmoran:
Yea my ex..... She came all the way from benue to leave with me, every day she keeps bombarding me with pictures of people wedding, fantasising on babies and us having kid together... Though this girl was cool she is homely can cook clean and kind of intelligent to spice it up my family loves her so much especially my dad, she has this free spirit personality.. But my instinct wasn't good with the idea it was too good to be true.. And secondly I wasn't ready financially to take on the burden of marriage but this girl never mind.... During December she travelled with my junior sister to his home town, to cut the story short I followed my instinct and today am a surviver of what would have given me heart attack....... During the thick of the moment she started showing are true colour, that homely girl started showing arrogant trait, the change was fast that I thought this can't be true... I did the right thing I broke up with her... Though my dad was sad about it but I let him know I know her more Than Them and what she portray is not who she is... A week after we brokeup my junior sister gave me the shocking news of my life.... That my ex was pregnant. . I didn't believe her cause We haven't had sex up to 4 months meaning when she was with me she was banging another dick... I waited till eight month later to find out she gave birth to a baby boy...and here let me burst your brain the father of the baby was my best friend who I trust so much...na that one pain me pass ... Lesson when a girl is trying to rush you into marraige run for your life.... If you want to get married do it at your convenient time... All girls would be at there good behavior during courtship, this one even take it to the extreme she even dey cut grass for compound... Na after marriage woman go show you are real colour....

lenghtinny:
I think the desperation starts coming up at the age of 25/26, then it enters the maturity age around 30+

You can’t blame them though. The societal pressure and reality don’t fit in.

Blackmann001:
Mine is different ooo... Just to date her, sh took me to a lab for HIV, hypatitis, blood sugar, genotype and other STDs....

Guyz line up for this lady door all kneeling for her attention. Instead of shakara wey I dey read here by the guy, I am being hopeful sh says yes sef...... Sh dates me alone ooo... But rivals of docs, pharmacist, working abroad, etc full road....

Na me dey even remind her of us and settling down, sh is 26 ND very pricy cuz sh did her own job on time.. Intelligent, beutiful, tall, speaks fine, works hard both domestically and at work place. Earns enough.

Na God hand we dey for her matter!

Joshmuch:
yet, they can ditch guys right, left and center in their 20s.

iamyemiakins:
Have you ever dated someone who desperately wanted to get married when you were not ready?



How was the experience?