Ayanfe29:

Ayanfe29:


Yes boss!


Elvictor, we're sorry for derailing your thread, we're going home. Hope you like our car?!

I don't mind at all, nice baby toy car *shines teeth*

Healman:
see level sha. Governor don turn Father o! i still dey wait sha, when the Father go disown the son. lolz

lol... disown ke

Lakesc:
Happy sunday op... Abeg help me slap Ugo head

what of Sunday rice na? the same to you.

*runs and slaps Ugo's head* gboooooosssaaaaaaa... issit enough? or my add jara!

Ayanfe29:



Na true love o! Go and shop for urs

U just dey make me jealous

Elvictor:


you dey fear for Oga Landlord?

Yes jo

Elvictor:




I don't mind at all, nice baby toy car *shines teeth*

Thanks. You can also join our family.

jerrykk:



U just dey make me jealous

Elvictor:


what of Sunday rice na? the same to you.

*runs and slaps Ugo's head* gboooooosssaaaaaaa... issit enough? or my add jara!

Na you suppose give us Sunday Rice but you kom starve us.

OGA LANDLORD 21+



Subtitle: Fu*ck Fakers.



Episode 82



I ignored him and jumped on the bed, I tried to catch sleep but that babe dey use motor while I dey use bicycle.

Ugochukwu: you no even comfort me with kind words.

Me: make thunder strike you, hope is kind enough *I hiss*

I was close to sleep after chasing her for a longtime, a knock landed on the door and Ugo asked the person to come in.
A maid stepped in...

Maid: sir Victor, His Excellency wan see you.

I looked at the maid, the babe fine wella. Her face heated up as I teared off her clothes with my eyes, fair and beautiful with nice round melons on her chest. I spanked my sense am already cheating on Veronica, help me oh!

Ugochukwu: Alicia...

She blushed and then gbam! I nodded in appreciation, finally na the girl wey disvirgin Ugochukwu be this oh! Shantel you get strong opposition oh!

Me: make we go.

Alicia: okay *she look back and wink at Ugo*

This one na first hand temptress, she opened the door and we stepped out into the exquisite hallway. The way her a-ss cheeks rumbled beneath the fabric made me think Ugochukwu was right when he said he was a virgin before the girl disvirgin him.

I met the governor with two men, the two of them looked powerful, I greeted and sat be side the governor on the sofa. He ordered me to sha..

Governor: son, see my lawyer and the chief judge.

I laugh Okoye for my mind, I greeted the gentlemen once again.

Lawyer: so wetin be the charges you wan file again am.

Me: corruption, public assault and attempted murder.

Chief judge: you get facts?

Me: yes, father here will provide concrete facts.

Lawyer: how about the public assault?

Me: is well known story.

Lawyer: how do you link all the life threats to the accuse?

I explained in detail how Okoye threatened and disgraced me publicly, how assassins invaded my yard, how Michael died in my stead and the gunshot I received after winning the primary. And lastly the kidnap.

Chief judge: good good... Wetin you want make I pass as penalty?

Me: nothing, I want make EFCC probe him and then I want the case to look like say he will go to jail so that he will spend so much money, after that the judgment go be let him pay damages, that is all.

Governor: *laughing boisterously* you be true son of your father, hahaha!

Chief judge: he has a good plan here, Mr. Okoye will be too distracted to even campaign with this kind case.

After some few minutes familiarities they left us, the governor wanted to tell me something but his wife suddenly came in.

Madam Stella: honey, wetin ona dey discuss?

Governor: this boy is so wise.

Me: good evening, her excellency.

Madam Stella: how are you Victor?

Me: am fine ma.

Governor: do you think Shasha will like him?

Madam Stella: naughty boy *she tap his shoulder*

She frowned at me, I suspected something is wrong and my yansh start to hot for the sofa nobody tell me say I need to run. Na me carry myself commot from where the two lovers are now having fun, truly the Governor love his wife very much regardless of the one pikin she dash am.

Life no balance at all, I strode on the hallway to enter my room when my phone rang.
I brought it out and the caller was unknown number, I picked it up.

Me: who be this?

There was silence on the other end, I waited for few seconds and no one spoke.

Me: hello...

Aisha's voice: hello, Vic.

Which kind wahala be this na? wetin I do this woman sef? is the corporal beating not enough? she wan come send me to early grave? All these questions just dey download for my mind.

Me: Aisha, wetin you want make I do so that you go disappear from my life?

Aisha's voice: *she chuckle* meet me tonight, I no go bother you again.

Me: promise.

Aisha's voice: yes.

I ended the call and met Ugochukwu in the room watching movie, I needed someone to accompany me in case the woman had another plan to get me into trouble, Ugochukwu go help me.

Me: guess what?

Ugochukwu: guess wetin?

Me: why you too dey behave like old man?

Ugochukwu: so I resemble small boy.

Me: Aisha say make we meet up.

Ugochukwu: good luck, see you next life.

Me: our two dey go together.

He turned his face away from the television screen and glared at me, hissed and turned his face back to the screen. One idea stroke me, I beamed and brought out my phone. Dialed Shantel's number, she picked.
I put am for loudspeaker...

Me: how are you Shantel? *Ugo turn*

Shantel's voice: am fine sir.

Me: chaii.. My friend bad oh! fine girl like you.

Shantel's voice: wetin em do?

Me: if I tell you, will you break up with him?

Shantel's voice: it depends *immediately Ugo start begging me with his palm*

Me: hello.. Helloo.. Helloo.. You dey hear me Shantel?

Shantel's voice: yes, sir.

Me: helloo... Helloo... Oohh! network.

I hung up the call and Ugochukwu inhaled sharply.

Ugochukwu: why you dey like risky game?

Me: you go follow me?

Ugochukwu: as if I get choice.

I called Aisha and informed her that am coming, she sent a hotel address and Ugochukwu and I went out to meet one of the she devil in my life.

TBC..

unitysheart:

Yes jo

hope say pharmacy dey close

Ayanfe29:

Thanks. You can also join our family.

as driver?

Ayanfe29:

Na you suppose give us Sunday Rice but you kom starve us.

I be adventist oh.. na Sabbath rice I dey offer without meat.

Elvictor:


hope say pharmacy dey close

One popular one dey

I'm enjoying you like Germans enjoy hot gin.

[/quote]

unitysheart:

One popular one dey

stay close you go need am.

unitysheart:
I'm enjoying you like Germans enjoy hot gin.

you are doing me toritori

Elvictor:


as driver?

Lol, make I ask my Oga at the top. BankyGee, what do you think?

Elvictor:


I be adventist oh.. na Sabbath rice I dey offer without meat.

Ayanfe29:

Lol, make I ask my Oga at the top. BankyGee, what do you think?

Babe, what do you want me to do with other driver? He can be a family friend

BankyGee:

Babe, what do you want me to do with other driver? He can be a family friend

Oya, give him our address.

Ayanfe29:

Oya, give him our address.

Just go to our house and call his name maybe he'd show up.

Ayanfe29:


Lol, make I ask my Oga at the top. BankyGee, what do you think?

[quote author=Ayanfe29 post=92420276]

BankyGee:

Babe, what do you want me to do with other driver? He can be a family friend

sounds funny.

BankyGee:
Just go to our house and call his name maybe he'd show up.

. thank you

OGA LANDLORD 21+


Subtitle: Fu*ck Fakers.



Episode 83



We got out of the house and entered the car in the executive garage, then we drove out of the Governor's residence.
On our way I started playing Eminem -I am not afraid, the song come make me fear more.

I just dey remember the corporal punishment, and wetin dey for my mind na turn back and run. I looked at Ugochukwu who sat on the front seat displaying gun.

Me: no be war na.

Ugochukwu: you for no invite me.

Me: you be my paddy.

Ugochukwu: which kind paddy dey drag em paddy to go meet General wife?

Me: no fear.

Ugochukwu: *laughing* hahahas, fear who?

Me: everything dey under my control.

Ugochukwu: until two soldiers go drag you away.

The conversation no even dey help matter, I knew Ugochukwu plan is to scare me back.
I hissed and focus on driving us there, my phone rang.

And I slowed asking Ugochukwu to connect it with the car.


Veronica's voice: unromantic boffie!! *shouting happily*

Me: *I dey hear music* this girl where you dey?

Veronica's voice: I go party.

Me: with who?

Veronica's voice: my new romantic boyfriend.

Me: you don inform em parents make them dig em grave and buy em coffin?

Veronica's voice: jealousy, I went out with Cynthia.

Me: that girl no know say you go soon marry, go house early oh.

Veronica's voice: sure, I go call you when I reach house.

Me: apart from boffie you nofit call me any other romantic name?

Veronica's voice: oh! *humming* what of my dragon?

Me: chisos! chisos! How my dragon come dey romantic?

Veronica's voice: ehnnn... My lion.

Me: chaii!! Hope say you nodey plan to turn me to one animal from wild family in the future?

Veronica's voice: what of the key to my puna?

Me: na now you come...

Veronica's voice: commot there, bad boy. Bye..

She hung up, this girl sha..

Ugochukwu: you be mumu oh! see wetin you want make your girlfriend call you?

Me: how that one give you krokro for yansh?

Ugochukwu: you get luck say you no be my small brother, the way I for dey beat you ehnn...by now you for don grow together with your sense.

I just looked at him and ignored him, em go rant tire. He isn't going back, we got to the beach.
Mehnn.. This woman dey always confuse person with her plan.

We walked around the beach, she sat under a canopy close to the sea.
I asked Ugochukwu to stay at the canopy close to her's and went to her alone, feeling cold.. I be na fear?

She sat and looked up when she saw me, she smiled immediately. I feel like slapping away her smile.

Aisha: you come?

Me: yes *so that you go disappear*

Aisha: am sorry.

Me: I don forgive you tay tay.

She beckoned on the waiter to get us drink, I wonder who tell am say I dey tasty.
I no go even craze drink anything.

Aisha: my husband is dead.

Me: *I happy for my mind* oh! sorry.

The waiter came over to our table and served us drink.

Aisha: am with your child.

Me: okay.

Aisha: you doubt me?

Me: no

Aisha: that girl wey I see you with na your girlfriend?

Me: yes.

She place her hand on mine and looked deep into my eyes, I moved away my hand from the table.

Aisha: your son and I need you.

Me: oh! thank you.

Aisha: you never touch your drink?

Me: oh! drink.

She was quiet and I folded my arms looking at her, I wonder which of the witch dey control this woman. She looked around and saw Ugochukwu.

Aisha: you came with your friend?

Me: oh! my friend *I join am look Ugo too*

Aisha: you no believe me?

Me: no.

She got up from her chair and moved behind, I tensed up wondering wetin the woman wan do. She placed her hands on my shoulder and messaged me softly.

Aisha: forgive us.

Me: oh! us.

I felt a pain on my head and I turned quickly, she smiled and moved away from behind me and sat back on her seat.

Me: you promise say you go disappear if I come see you, bye.

She didn't say a word as Ugochukwu and I left, I wonder wetin dey make the woman happy.
So people just dey shameless, how on Earth I go even agree to have anything with her.

I was happy General no wait for me to show am even grave before em enter, I was got back Madam Stella sent a maid to call me.

She was standing on the balcony when I met her.

Madam Stella: wetin you and my husband dey plan?

Me: nothing.

Madam Stella: you wan marry my daughter?

Me: no, I have a fiancee.

Madam Stella: *she roll her eyes* she go die anyways.

TBC...

Chinsos !!!! U will end up in my gathering chai so him dey fear chop kpomo wey him don enjoy tire

Madam Stella! Wetin the worry u sef Thanks for the update op.

My able landlord @elvictor, we dey wait o.

Still waiting ooo...

OGA LANDLORD 21+



Subtitle: Fu*ck Fakers.



Episode 84



I stared at the woman who looked indifferent while talking about to kill somebody like chicken, she no even dey moved. I feel like lifting her up and throw her down from the balcony, she go fall scatter into different pieces.

But na feelings sha.. You no expect me to try that kind thing, she sipped from the glass of wine in her hand and looked at me expectantly. My village people don fail, lai lai.

Me: why?

Madam Stella: *laughing* wetin you want my talk?

Me: don't hurt her, I go do anything you want.

Madam Stella: *laughing wickedly* hahaha, you don already kill her.

Me: *I frown* how na?

Madam Stella: *hiss irritably* just go, I am tired.

She yawned and stretched, I felt defeated why this woman dey talk about someone safety with parable.
She strode out and walked majestically through the door.

I rushed and grabbed her from behind, used my hand and tightened it around her neck. Asked her to tell me, she was frightened and spoke. That kind thing na very impossible imagination, I sighed in defeat and walked inside my room.

I opened the door and saw the room illuminated, I closed the door and saw Ugochukwu sitting on a sofa with his legs on the table.
He was enjoying himself...

Me: bro, you don eat na?

Ugochukwu: so?

Me: why you dey abuse the two fried legs of chicken and juice?

Ugochukwu: *he frown at me* when you start to fight for food right?

Me: you go get running stomach oh.

Ugochukwu: wetin concern you if my stomach wan run, na still part of exercise just allow the matter rest biko?

He started chewing the chicken laps noisily and drinking the juice with loud throat noise, my stomach start to respond.
Hungry saliva moved in numbers to my mouth, I started salivating.

Me: *I shout* noooo! I no go chop!!

Ugochukwu quickly picked up the plate and the juice in his other hand while the other held the chicken.

Ugochukwu: hope say you never mad? who even call you to come join me. You better sleep oh!

I hissed heavily and undressed I went for the towel.

Ugochukwu: wait wait... You be neat guy oh!

Me: *I wrap the towel around my waist* na today you know.

Ugochukwu: why your di-ck barb moromoro and your arm-pit barb punk?

Me: hope say you no be...

Ugochukwu: no think am, befoe thunder go roast you.

I went inside the bathroom and had my bath, I tried to sleep but what Madam Stella said made sleep to be far away.
Nothing will happen to Veronica, I vowed.

The next morning the Lawyer came for us to prepare for the case the next day, we sat in the garden and planned.
I narrated the third filing, which will be to accuse him of trying to kill me and kidnap.

Lawyer: no involve the other girl that died that time.

Me: thank you.

He promised that with those facts my accusation is in my favour, I was about going in when my baby called.

Me: girlfriend, how far?

Veronica's voice: why you nofit seek for google help to teach you how to be sexy?

Me: I get surprise for you.

Veronica's voice: *laughing* hahaha, I bet say this your surprise go get bend leg.

Me: no worry, iffa I catch you.

I ended the call and went inside the house, the girl no go ever make me get angry.
I texted her where to meet me, I prepared and went there.

I called her line but it was switched off, I felt like to beat senses into that girl.
After thirty minutes she walked into the eatery and took my breathe away, my anger was formated.

Pretty girls are big problem in this world, I stared hungrily at her. And imagined what I will do to her after now.

Veronica: boffie! You fit stop to dream and prevent flies from entering your mouth.

Me: *my senses return* so, your time na 2pm?

Veronica: I use thirty minutes to look good for you.

One idiot sitting by our tabled turned,

Idiot: you look beautiful.

Veronica: thank you *beaming with smile*

I clenched my fist, is like these days these girl wants to make me go mad. I exhaled my anger and ate quietly, she started eating too 'cause I don order everything.

Voice: you are so fine boo, cute lover like no other.

My eyes googled for the voice and saw the girl and the chimpanzee she was calling cute, Veronica will never say that.
See cute chimpanzee but her girlfriend is telling him that he is cute.

I looked at her sternly and she raised her head and looked at me.

Veronica: what?

I moved my face and she got the message I wanted to pass to her, she saw them.

Veronica: so?

Me: you no sweet at all.

Veronica: *she wink* you sure?

Me: *I nod* yes.

Veronica: when I no gree give you sweet again, no cry oh!

Me: no even think am, I fit kill for that thing oh.

Veronica: my papa na god of war oh!

I realized I don't know anything concerning my girlfriend's background.

Me: tell me about your dad.

TBC..