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My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Zayttoven: 7:28pm On Jan 05, 2021
bukatyne:


Male or female?

Age range?

Career?

Why must it be all or nothing? undecided

Are there no successfully married people in your field?

Male

Early 30s

Pilot

Well, I've learnt a great deal about compromising

There are, but you know everyone can't have it easy.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 7:28pm On Jan 05, 2021
Zayttoven:


Well, you know every where you go, you'd always meet the good and bad.
I've also met Nigerian girls who weren't after the money or materialistic but they didn't want the same thing as me, they were considering marriage anytime soon.
So I let them be.
We also have very pretty Nigerian girls, I've met a lot.
Because they are old already na.
I am suffering the same thing where you'd see a pretty lady,financially stable and kind,but they all have one common problem which is age ,reason they are always pushing for marriage.
Nigeria capitalism wasn't built for people to attain stability early unless one is very fortunate.
And I want a youthful person,very youthful!Cos I wanna enjoy her to the fullest before she starts deteriorating.
I don't know about you though,maybe you don't mind rubbing on dry leather,but I do grin

4 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Zayttoven: 7:42pm On Jan 05, 2021
UyaiIncomparabl:
Get your career going first, OP. Remember, you can always get a good woman as far as you are discerning, but a career may not wait.

But then, if you are a good multi-tasker, you can get along with marriage. I don't see how marriage thwarts your career advancement if you are very determined, and are ambitious.

Well, at the moment it's my career that's getting in the way. I've got so much going on right now that I can't focus on marriage as much as I want to.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Zayttoven: 7:46pm On Jan 05, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Because they are old already na.
I am suffering the same thing where you'd see a pretty lady,financially stable and kind,but they all have one common problem which is age ,reason they are always pushing for marriage.
Nigeria capitalism wasn't built for people to attain stability early unless one is very fortunate.
And I want a youthful person,very youthful!Cos I wanna enjoy her to the fullest before she starts deteriorating.
I don't know about you though,maybe you don't mind rubbing on dry leather,but I do grin

Personally I feel it's hard to see a young lady under the age of 26 who's doing well and is ready to get married. Maybe because they are so focused on advancing their careers, they throw aside marriage.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 8:07pm On Jan 05, 2021
Zayttoven:


Personally I feel it's hard to see a young lady under the age of 26 who's doing well and is ready to get married. Maybe because they are so focused on advancing their careers, they throw aside marriage.
90% don't have careers at this point and will most times be seen as liabilities to men who want youthful,productive women(in essence,deficient men).
Mehn,if I were you I'd look for a youngster from a good home(less baggage) and brush her up to my taste and spec so that I can enjoy her youthfulness and be happy with her for a long time before that sad,sorry phase of their lives come up(it happens to all women).
Don't let trivial things as money /career deprive you of happiness and go and carry one old layer in the name of woman which at the end of the day you'd regret,because you'll find out that women are really not wired to support homes with finances.
Like what can they even contribute?Even the so called working class apart from cooking soup and stocking the fridge? undecided
You'd soon find out that the only tangible thing a woman can offer a comfortable man is her youth,nothing else!
Commot hand for old women matter in the name of career woman unless you are lucky enough to find a youthful one.
No say I no tell you.

8 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Childrentablets(f): 12:23am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
90% don't have careers at this point and will most times be seen as liabilities to men who want youthful,productive women(in essence,deficient men).
Mehn,if I were you I'd look for a youngster from a good home(less baggage) and brush her up to my taste and spec so that I can enjoy her youthfulness and be happy with her for a long time before that sad,sorry phase of their lives come up(it happens to all women).
Don't let trivial things as money /career deprive you of happiness and go and carry one old layer in the name of woman which at the end of the day you'd regret,because you'll find out that women are really not wired to support homes with finances.
Like what can they even contribute?Even the so called working class apart from cooking soup and stocking the fridge? undecided
You'd soon find out that the only tangible thing a woman can offer a comfortable man is her youth,nothing else!
Commot hand for old women matter in the name of career woman unless you are lucky enough to find a youthful one.
No say I no tell you.


Zayttoven its better you dont follow this advices. After you are done brushing up the girl to your taste, she probably sets off with someone and then you come running back to Nairaland with hide my moniker stories that touch.

It’s pretty obvious you’re not ready for commitment, it you were, trust me, you wouldn’t have opened this thread. Just focus on your career, that’s where your heart is for now. When it’s time, you will know. Still keep good friends around you too, most times it’s from them we eventually marry from. Hence the saying, marry your friend

2 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 7:52am On Jan 06, 2021
Early 30s & a Pilot? Bro you have enough time.

Once you are nearing 37, just know your time is up. 33 - 35 is the Ideal age.

Zayttoven:


Male

Early 30s

Pilot

Well, I've learnt a great deal about compromising

There are, but you know everyone can't have it easy.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 9:24am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Because they are old already na.
I am suffering the same thing where you'd see a pretty lady,financially stable and kind,but they all have one common problem which is age ,reason they are always pushing for marriage.
Nigeria capitalism wasn't built for people to attain stability early unless one is very fortunate.
And I want a youthful person,very youthful!Cos I wanna enjoy her to the fullest before she starts deteriorating.
I don't know about you though,maybe you don't mind rubbing on dry leather,but I do grin

Is a young 22 year old pretty MBBS graduate employed in a Federal Government Hospital with upper middle class parents financially stable according to your standards?

9 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by lahizak: 9:39am On Jan 06, 2021
poshestmina:


South Africa where they are only saints and Angels ?
There are good,bad and evil people in every part /countries.
The fact you've met some good SA babes doesn't make them all perfect and better than their Nigeria counterparts.

There are well cultured , beautiful,sexy and career women in Nigeria too...that you've been meeting the shafts and leeches and why ,is upto you to figure out.

Y'all castigating Nigeria women online and crying Rivers in the Dms. undecided undecided.
I don't have time too for gross masculine foolishness .

Bye!
Abeggy. I know u a naija babe so u will want to be defensive. I don't like generalisation but with d exception of few Nigerian ladies, what d guy said was absolutely spot on. Southy girls have better and modern orientation than Niger gals. Religion, culture and peer pressure has affected an average naija lady

4 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 9:45am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


Is a young 22 year old pretty MBBS graduate employed in a Federal Government Hospital with upper middle class parents financially stable according to your standards?
Yes,very much..good!

2 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 10:02am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Yes,very much..good!

I saw some of them in the hospital during my last visit working with their Chief consultants. Young pretty medical doctors. Fine face with figure 8. The beautiful ones are not yet born, indeed.

These girls gain admission in Private universities at 16 these days. No ASUU strike or prolonged semester. In less than 6 years, they are done.

Check the medical sector boss. It's rare to see old women graduating from there because of the amount of reading and dedication required.

2 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 10:05am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


I saw some of them in the hospital during my last visit working with their Chief consultants. Young pretty medical doctors. Fine face with figure 8. The beautiful ones are not yet born, indeed.

These girls gain admission in Private universities at 16 these days. No ASUU strike or prolonged semester. In less than 6 years, they are done.

Check the medical sector boss.
As a matter of fact I have been thinking towards this line for a long time,and it seems it's just what I'll do.
Thanks man,I really appreciate it.
I will visit hospitals more henceforth. grin
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 10:09am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
As a matter of fact I have been thinking towards this line for a long time,and it seems it's just what I'll do.
Thanks man,I really appreciate it.
I will visit hospitals more henceforth. grin

It's rare to see old women graduating from there because of the amount of reading and dedication required. Plus high IQ for your children. The sky would be their beginning with a billionaire father like you (business sense) and intelligent mother (medical doctor) who will spend more time guiding them to achieve academic success.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 10:22am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


It's rare to see old women graduating from there because of the amount of reading and dedication required. Plus high IQ for your children. The sky would be their beginning with a billionaire father like you (business sense) and intelligent mother (medical doctor) who will spend more time guiding them to achieve academic success.
Ha baba I'm not a billionaire yet ooo.
But one thing certain is that I'll like to raise smart offspring so definitely I'd look for a befitting mother to marry.If I was looking for just about anybody,I'd have been taken a long time ago. cheesy
I've had 2 befitting relationships but with older women.Its all fun and exciting at first but when it comes to commitment,one begins to see the difficulty in such unions.
And I wouldn't like to have more than 2 kids and I wanna start soon so we can all grow together so time is really running out for me.

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Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 10:27am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Ha baba I'm not a billionaire yet ooo.
But one thing certain is that I'll like to raise smart offspring so definitely I'd look for a befitting mother to marry.If I was looking for just about anybody,I'd have been taken a long time ago. cheesy
I've had 2 befitting relationships but with older women.Its all fun and exciting at first but when it comes to commitment,one begins to see the difficulty in such unions.
And I wouldn't like to have more than 2 kids and I wanna start soon so we can all grow together so time is really running out for me.

I know you ain't a billionaire yet. But it's obvious you'll be in the next 10 years because of your mindset and determination. I was futuristic in my previous comment.

1 Like

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 10:36am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


I know you ain't a billionaire yet. But it's obvious you'll be in the next 10 years because of your mindset and determination. I was futuristic in my previous comment.
Oh yeah?
Why do you think so?
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 10:39am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Oh yeah?
Why do you think so?
From my judgement, I think all you're doing at this stage of your life is a preamble to your real ambition and plans.
You'll most likely diversify into large scale production. I haven't seen a large scale manufacturer who isn't rich.
The amazing thing about you is that you do not intend to run a local sole proprietorship manufacturing firm prevalent among your Igbo people. You intend to establish a world class business with shareholders which may evolve into a conglomerate.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 10:49am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:

From my judgement, I think all you're doing at this stage of your life is a preamble to your real ambition and plans.
You'll most likely diversify into large scale production. I haven't seen a large scale manufacturer who isn't rich.
The amazing thing about you is that you do not intend to run a local sole proprietorship manufacturing firm prevalent among your Igbo people. You intend to establish a world class business with shareholders which may evolve into a conglomerate.
Well,yes.
I am not a huge fan of importation and I believe a lot of the things people rush to China to import can very well be produced here,reason why I support very well the free float of the naira to help offset high cost of production here than China.
Someone needs to change the narrative for sure,its something I know can be done but first I've got to build my trade networks.
You know what kills many industry is the inability to sell.
Mine will be different.
Create trade networks first(by trading of course) and then manufacture and distribute via the trade networks you created in your time in trade.
Nothing is impossible sha.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 10:55am On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Well,yes.
I am not a huge fan of importation and I believe a lot of the things people rush to China to import can very well be produced here,reason why I support very well the free float of the naira to help offset high cost of production here than China.
Someone needs to change the narrative for sure,its something I know can be done but first I've got to build my trade networks.
You know what kills many industry is the inability to sell.
Mine will be different.
Create trade networks first(by trading of course) and then manufacture and distribute via the trade networks you created in your time in trade.
Nothing is impossible sha.

That's why I said your current business is a preamble to your main plans and ambition.

1. To provide at least 30% capital for your production business (your real dream).
2. To help you build networks which will not make your production business go through the traditional 3-5 years of uncertainty before seeing the light.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 11:11am On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


That's why I said your current business is a preamble to your main plans and ambition.

1. To provide at least 30% capital for your production business (your real dream).
2. To help you build networks which will not make your production business go through the traditional 3-5 years of uncertainty before seeing the light.
Yea yeah its all part of the plan.
Thanks men,
smiley

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Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by HarunaWest(m): 12:11pm On Jan 06, 2021
Zayttoven:
There was once a time I dreamt of having the life I have now but now that I do, I don't feel so sure again.
2019, I was so optimistic i'll settle down before the end of 2020. Well, I would blame it on the pandemic but not entirely. I would say it was my fault in some way.

2020, I said i'll try again in 2021. Guess what, I got a job offer which pays double of what I currently earn. It's too good an offer to pass by, but then it reduces my chances of getting married this year.

Oh, I also forget that I'm travelling to the U.S this March on a type rating course which will take a couple of months. After that, I'm thinking of relocating to S.A for the new job.

In a nutshell I've zeroed any plans of settling this year.
I feel like my career is the problem here or am I procrastinating too much?
I have all I need except time.

If you've ever been in such a situation how did you handle it?
Give girl belle.....

Afterall, No church in the wild.

1 Like

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by poshestmina(f): 12:42pm On Jan 06, 2021
lahizak:

Abeggy. I know u a naija babe so u will want to be defensive. I don't like generalisation but with d exception of few Nigerian ladies, what d guy said was absolutely spot on. Southy girls have better and modern orientation than Niger gals. Religion, culture and peer pressure has affected an average naija lady


The same way a South African man will defend and want to be with a Nigeria woman undecided undecided undecided undecided undecided.

5 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by poshestmina(f): 12:43pm On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Yes,very much..good!

cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy.
You need help!

1 Like

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Klass99(f): 1:07pm On Jan 06, 2021
smiley
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Raalsalghul: 1:21pm On Jan 06, 2021
truthsayer009:
Early 30s & a Pilot? Bro you have enough time.

Once you are nearing 37, just know your time is up. 33 - 35 is the Ideal age.


Where una dey even get all this kind talk? undecided

4 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 1:44pm On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
Yea yeah its all part of the plan. Thanks men, smiley
There's a lot to learn from you, Boss.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Mariangeles(f): 2:14pm On Jan 06, 2021
Zayttoven:


Male

Early 30s

Pilot

Well, I've learnt a great deal about compromising

There are, but you know everyone can't have it easy.

Marrying a flight attendant will be the best option for you.

1 Like

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 2:14pm On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


There's a lot to learn from you, Boss.
No,I believe I still have a lot to learn from you too so I'd say there's a lot to learn from each other.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by cococandy(f): 2:35pm On Jan 06, 2021
You make time for what you want.

4 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by Nobody: 2:46pm On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:
No,I believe I still have a lot to learn from you too so I'd say there's a lot to learn from each other.

I'm 21 and you'll be 29.
Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by cococandy(f): 2:53pm On Jan 06, 2021
TransAtlanticEx:

smiley

How many financially stable men in Nigeria are 25 years old and below? You want a woman to be younger than 25 for you to marry her but also want her to be doing well financially. In the same Nigerian govt system that affects both you and her? How do you propose she achieve the very thing that none of you have been able to achieve?

Do you sound reasonable to yourself when you say that?

So, needless to say, whatever she is will never be good enough. And that’s what you count on to make sure you keep them feeling bad about themselves.

1) If she’s young enough for you, she will be a liability coming only with her “box of clothes” for you to rescue.
2) if she works hard and dedicates time and energy to be financially stable before marriage, she would be too old, rotten and beneath you for marriage.

Do any of you apply common sense to your misogyny before you come to spread it online?


You didn’t have to ruin this young man’s thread, but you did anyway because you couldn’t resist.

Hopefully as I’m typing this, you’ve found a financially stable 23 year old South African girl and are currently marrying her as we speak.

You’d think men who age shame women have no plans of ever growing old. Be careful what you wish for.

18 Likes

Re: My Career Getting In The Way Of Me Settling Down by TransAtlanticEx(m): 3:00pm On Jan 06, 2021
ethicallyright:


I'm 21 and you'll be 29.
Yes,I just turned 29 some days ago.
I like that you are young and smart,very smart!
Very hard to find these days,kudos man.
Remember,don't marry old women oo,no matter their guilt tripping.Its the only advise I can give you since you already know everything else.
Believe me it's worth it!

2 Likes

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