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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened (79131 Views)
Kenyan Man Returns Empty-Handed 42 Years After He Left Home For Greener Pastures / None Of My Fiance's Family Members Likes Me. Please Help / My Fiance Has A Child Out Of Wedlock. But Kept It A Secret From Me. (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Napoleon27(m): 9:26am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Mariangeles:You'll just open mouth waaaaaa!!! 4 Likes |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by orlaglobal234: 9:38am On Jan 09, 2021 |
And if find out this lady is from eastern part because that's their way they see their daughter as an investment as avenue to making money through the in law very bad idea, if guy don't have money you will see the mother advice her daughter to end up the relationship because of omugo 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by VanBommel(m): 9:41am On Jan 09, 2021 |
seanwilliam:Omo that guy is brutal 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Teymanhenry(f): 9:46am On Jan 09, 2021 |
is your mum a begger? it is never a right for her to always receive or gain where she didn't work |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by BigJoe19: 9:49am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Nairaland girls just showed how they are, I hope the men are learning, sorry the simps. |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by onpoint69(m): 9:49am On Jan 09, 2021 |
"the gift of a man makes way for him", so says the scripture. a little bit of emotional intelligence could have helped this bro. nothing wrong in taking a little gift to your prospective mother-in-law. bro wasn't wise. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Empredboy(m): 9:57am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Mariangeles:and that should lead to breakup? |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Klass99(f): 10:02am On Jan 09, 2021 |
1 Like 1 Share |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Acidosis(m): 10:05am On Jan 09, 2021 |
TheOnlyUyai: zealousayo: Regex: bukatyne: Ah that's true o. Didn't see that part earlier. Thats entitlement mentality right there. I hope the OP amends her ways 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by CorleonOfSicily: 10:12am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Trayceey:This kind of lady wey like gift, the next thing is to hear that their children belongs to Adam Nuru of FCMB. Una don see biological ATM. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by openmine(m): 10:18am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Gkemz:Based on what she said in the first page of this thread,this is not his first time of his coming or visit and the last time he went there,he brought gifts to the mother! The problem is that the mother expects those gifts to be 'consistent' any time he shows up in her abode....which for me is unfortunate and smacks of an entitlement mentality! Even the op had initially found nothing wrong with what her fiance did until she fell under the influence of her mum and scolded the fiance on phone for not bringing any gift to the mum! 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Noblewealth(m): 10:27am On Jan 09, 2021 |
I had similar experience last 2years although before I left, I visited the nearest store to get the mother some stuff but before then the mother had listed what I must be doing on a regular basis for her, she said I must make sure I support her for ongoing edu programm, atleast give her money for upkeep everyweek, make her new hair and also change her wadrope.. naso I japa, the woman was just mentioning responsibilities like say I dey work for world bank.. Till now the girl never marry.. African mother's will their entitlement mentality.. your mum made the wrong decision and she doesn't want you to marry early by the time you clock 35 she won't even collect toiletries.. person wey no do now, go do much later.. 5 Likes |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by comtem2011: 10:51am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Noblewealth:You don't mean it!!! It's well with her daughter's future husband o. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Shugargal(f): 11:01am On Jan 09, 2021 |
TransAtlanticEx:Thumbs up bro.. If I be the guy, for even hanging up phone on me, is enough for me to never ever call her again. Nansense! |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by AnnieUmana: 11:04am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Your Fiance Going To Visit Your Mum With Something Shows How Responsible He Is, Note: He Is Your Fiance Ie Your Husband To Be, If Your Mum Didn't Like The Way He Showed Up With Nothing,he Could Have Just Apologise And Do Better Next Visit. Because If You Did Not Tell Him About That Maybe The Next Visit That's How It Would Have Been. |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by nick50(m): 11:14am On Jan 09, 2021 |
You and your mom shouldn't direct ur grievances to the guy please he is not Buhari and his Fulani bandits that made life hard for Nigerians.. U alone knows ur fiancee's capacity n attitude.. Am sure ur mum didn't gift ur grandma Rose Royce before she got married to ur father 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by jahrulusyahoo(m): 11:17am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Your mum is not entitled to a gift from your fiance anytime he visits. Please let your mum know this or you will never experience a peaceful marriage in future and she might be disregarded for life by future inlaws if she doesn't stop. Trayceey: |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Torontoraptors: 11:23am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Trayceey: Hey dear. Your mom did nothing wrong. She is not hungry, neither does that show sign of poverty. Ignore all these high school kids behind phone keypads batching you left, right and center. Many of them are ill trained wannabes. A Responsible young man coming to meet your parents should have at least brought a bottle of non alcoholic wine with him. Over here, you won’t dare visit the family of the girl you intend to date without at least a bottle of wine. You will be disgraced. Whites know to respectfully disgrace you. Does that mean the family is poor or can not afford the wine? NO. It is called. Courtesy. Can you attend a business dinner at your boss’s house without at least a bottle of wine? NO. Would you visit your village traditional ruler without a bottle of liquor? NO So why would any sensible young man visit his future inlaws empty handed? It is a sign of gross irresponsibility. You tend to wonder why moral is fast going into extinction in Nigeria. Reason is not far fetched. Ill raised kids everywhere from poorly raised parents Watching too many movies. Disrespectful wannabes. You can not give what you do not have. Poorly trained parents can not pass morals down to their wards. My 2 cents for you 1. Keep your private life off social media. Not everything you bring to the public 2. Stay away from that young man. He is a bad omen. If he thinks your family is hungry and poor, did he train you till this time? Did he pay your school fees to now? Did he feed you till now? 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Magnoliaa(f): 11:26am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Hathor5: Hahahaha. This cracked me up. Custodians that'll want to infuse individualistic norms in communal African setting tomorrow. A compromise might be possible oh, but there are bound to be clashes. If you're upholding culture that says you're marrying into a family and you must always honour them with gifts - will you accept the whole family interfering in your decisions to get pregnant, raise and name children, relocate faraway for your autonomy, have sex, spend money and the way assets you both have will be shared after the demise of either partner when the time comes? 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Nuclear99(m): 11:27am On Jan 09, 2021 |
TransAtlanticEx:you are a legend bro... I like how you responded 1 Like
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Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by exegesis: 11:34am On Jan 09, 2021 |
I don't go and visit family friends without buying even if it's hundred naira oranges, let alone my in laws. But that's me naturally. I don't like visiting people empty handed. I'd rather stay at home if I have nothing to give. But my husband is different. He believes it will give people entitlement mentality. So he alternates when he goes visiting with gifts and tells me I worry too much about pleasing people. I have had to learn the hard way because there's a family friend who expects me to bring gifts anytime I'm coming. When I don't, she beefs about it and has even extended the entitlement mentality to everyone because of me. Before hubby and I got married, I once apologised to my mother in law for not sending her money and she asked me if I was trying to bribe her. Different strokes for different folks. My parents would be more concerned about making my husband comfortable whenever he visits than looking at his hands to see what he brought or didn't bring for them. I guess it's different upbringing. The op should have put it jokingly to the guy to get why he didn't come with anything. Good to know they settled their differences though. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by bobluck: 11:38am On Jan 09, 2021 |
Trayceey: Gold diggers and Endtime women everywhere.....mtchew! |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Bobicey(m): 11:42am On Jan 09, 2021 |
To even think that you see advises/the bitter truth you’re getting from everyone and you’re still particular about this guys comment shows how childish and immature your mind works....your man deserves better�♂️ 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by donbabsaint(m): 12:07pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
colestephan86:go back and read some of OP response again, it's not the first time per se. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by bluefilm: 12:13pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
Mariangeles: Neenu onye nkea. It's now you know you are african abi? All the time you were busy doing your nonsense FEMINISM, were you also being african then or not? Nezie nu gi. Onu di gi ka africa. Africa gbukwee gi dia. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by donbabsaint(m): 12:27pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
SURElee:God bless you dear. Only if she will listen to you. |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by slap1(m): 12:32pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
You and your mom may have chased away a good guy because of your entitlement mentality. You were not at home, yet he still wanted to go see your mom. That's a good guy, any day. He has probably seen you as family and will have sacrificed far more than the gifts you expected, when necessary. And to think you hung up on him for something as petty as that is mind-boggling. Call him and reconcile with him. Your mom was wrong. I would feel she appreciates gifts more than my presence and I may never want to be associated with her (and you, by extension) anymore. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Nobody: 12:35pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
Torontoraptors:Thanks a lot 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Nobody: 1:00pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
So cos of ordinary bread na im wan cause wahala for una relationship.anyway now is d time for u guys to break up 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by blackboy2star(m): 1:11pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
Not Africa alone, Western world you will go with at least a bottle of wine. Your guy is daft and not okay. Mariangeles: 1 Like |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Longman8: 1:17pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
I no say na from sheet dem dey chop snail.though it is little things that matters the most. But mama and daughter no try sha,dem too overreact.Guyman no dey perfect na. |
Re: My Fiance Visited My Mother Empty-Handed & Now Our Relationship Is Threatened by Oharina(m): 1:18pm On Jan 09, 2021 |
TransAtlanticEx:Ahh bros, you have damaged the leach career, im even shedding her tears for her |
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