₦airaland Forum

I feel your pain dear, just be calm with the situations. But let no one make you feel you don't need friends overthere. The friends you make today is what your kids will call connection tomorrow. Try to study your contenance, as you go out daily, wear a good smiling face and try to greet coursemates and any one you find interesting with a hi. some of us here on NL have not been there before so filter our advices before implimentation. best of luck.

MajesticKris:
If you need friends, send me invitation I'll come...
I get passport already.

Your brain supposes to tell you that this is a cooked-up story...

Keep fooling yourself

Oracleforce:
Your brain supposes to tell you that this is a cooked-up story...

Keep fooling yourself

Na hook up story joo!

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Hello dear, I'm so sorry to hear that you are facing this here.

First off, you need to find a Nigerian whatsapp group in your area. I know each province has a group.

Now you are not making friends, most likely, you have an unfriendly aura, so people can sense the negative energy even when you try.
Fortunately its easy to take care of it. And I will tell you what worked for my son: Go to the mirror each morning and say " I am happy, I am kind, life is good, I am great at making friends, my friends like me, I am the best"
You might need to say this for months until it gets deep in your spirit and then boom.
Now this is something tried and tested for ME and my kids and not something that I read up.

When you go to the stores, or anywhere attempt simple short conversation. Canadians like to talk.....A LOT.

Finally if you are a Christian, talk to the Lord about it. He knows how to put friends (not sexual ones for now, because you re not married) in your path

I wish you the best and just know that there a few impossibilities in this world

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Such is life..focus on your studies...I have been in that shoe...
Everything will fall in the place...as tym goes on

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Please can we be friends ? I would love to contact you

see your Monika self .... lol

Bebetter:
The easiest way to develop a friendship with someone is to share common interests. That's the way to get honest inter relations without forcing it. What are the stuff you like? Art, music, kinds of movies, poetry, dancing, novels? what's your talent, hobby or passion that's strong? once you know this, go to places or join groups that have the same interests/likes that you share and you will make good, honest friends. Book clubs, movie clubs, dancing groups, poetry clubs etc. The common interest will form the basis for better communication with others which could lead to friendships as well. You can also start a blog and publish online. write about topics that make you happy and sometimes, once in a while, pour out your heart in writing. You may be surprised to find that you are not the only one facing the same struggles and you could build an online community of readers who share the same views and challenges. You could also start up a new instagram page to share your passion with the world. If it's fashion, you could play dress up every now and then and post nice pictures on the gram, if you love places, you could go around visiting fun places and posting pictures and short stories about your time there... find what you love, do it passionately and share it with the world. Soon you'll find that people may begin to appreciate you for that and connect with you on that happy level. You are still young and you want to flex.... no worry, time dey come, na you go run for groove!

@Childofthelord, i strongly recommend you follow the counsel above because I'll do just that too.

In addition to it, go on Coursera, and take a course titled: Storytelling and influencing; communicating with impact by Macquarie University. it'll be cool if you enrol and, take the full specialization.

The specialization contain the following courses:
* Storytelling and influencing; communicating with impact.
* Critical thinking skills for university success.
*Problem solving skills for university success.
*Information and digital literacy for university success.
*Build Personal Resilience.
*Leading transformation: Manage change.

You can add the course below to it;
*Successful Presentation by University of Colorado boulder.

I'm exactly like you and, my social life and, self esteem got a boost after taking this courses though, I must confess, I still don't have friends cause, I don't go out and, I don't have anything taking me out.

Personally, I think there's a socializing gene that is dormant in our brain that, needs to be triggered and I don't know what can trigger it!

I just finished my Nysc in Lag and, through out the 1yr of service, I made only one friend(a female) few days to my pop and, this my new friend, is gradually turning to an acquitance cause our chatting reduced drastically after the pop and, I guess she got fed up of always initiating the conversation.

Me, thinking out loud now, do we really need casual friends? We're in the Era of 4th industrial revolution that is characterized by a range of new technologies fusing the physical, digital, and biological worlds, impacting all disciplines, economies, and industries, and even challenging ideas about what it means to be human.

What I need in my life are (my circle)more mentors and role models that will aid me, get to where I want to be faster and, definitely a gf/fiancee/wife of my own.

When I get bored or depressed, I listen to Apostle Joshua Selman messages and, I surf the web from IG to NL to LinkedIn to Quora to YouTube, listen to music or movies(very rare) and get back to work/studying.

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

yes it is normal

I think I have a solution for you OP @Childofthelord. Feel free to send me a message so I can walk you through it..

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Hope the cold isn't affecting you? Canada is cool tho but the weather nah!!!!! I prefer the US

heendrix:
Got bout 2 friends in Canada both girls giving same complaint to that guys don't ask them out there.....still trying to find a suitable reason for that tho

The reason is that most Nigerian guys are mainly after other ladies from other countries.... While the Canadians don't give a Bleep about immigrants or international students. They are very cold and unfriendly. They prefer to look front and date Canadians!!

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Well sorry dear I can understand how you feel and how lonely you are and you know atimes our parents have their own ways of affecting our social life but when you are now growing up and you realize that you start regretting everything but trust your parents are good they just want a good life for you....if you don’t mind you can always talk to me and we can also get to know each other better if you don’t mind....you can just chat me privately so we can talk more and exchange contact trust me you would really like the kind of friendship just stay cool and face your study

While i do agree that Canadians do not give a shit about immigrants, I think they are quite friendly to everyone, but they want no relationship or long-time friendship whatsoever. Most of the time there has to be a linking factor, like taking the same course or being in the same committee but once that is over, they can see you on the street and act like they don't even know you. It takes wisdom to realize that that behaviour of theirs has nothing to do with you. For me, it wasn't until i heard similar scenerios before i realized that i was not the bad person. And yeah, Nigerian guys are always after the white girls.

TysonsCorner:
The reason is that most Nigerian guys are mainly after other ladies from other countries.... While the Canadians don't give a Bleep about immigrants or international students. They are very cold and unfriendly. They prefer to look front and date Canadians!!

Obviously the cold affects everyone, right now its about -6c. Although BC is actually the one of the warm sides of Canada, the thing about the cold is that it keeps everyone indoors, the weather forecast can keep you in your house for days. And now that most Universities in Canada are teaching remotely, it gets worse. Everything is online.

TysonsCorner:
Hope the cold isn't affecting you? Canada is cool tho but the weather nah!!!!! I prefer the US

Thanks for this invaluable advice. I will definitely work on these courses!

Ikjosh04:
@Childofthelord, i strongly recommend you follow the counsel above because I'll do just that too.

In addition to it, go on Coursera, and take a course titled: Storytelling and influencing; communicating with impact by Macquarie University. it'll be cool if you enrol and, take the full specialization.

The specialization contain the following courses:
* Storytelling and influencing; communicating with impact.
* Critical thinking skills for university success.
*Problem solving skills for university success.
*Information and digital literacy for university success.
*Build Personal Resilience.
*Leading transformation: Manage change.

You can add the course below to it;
*Successful Presentation by University of Colorado boulder.

I'm exactly like you and, my social life and, self esteem got a boost after taking this courses though, I must confess, I still don't have friends cause, I don't go out and, I don't have anything taking me out.

Personally, I think there's a socializing gene that is dormant in our brain that, needs to be triggered and I don't know what can trigger it!

I just finished my Nysc in Lag and, through out the 1yr of service, I made only one friend(a female) few days to my pop and, this my new friend, is gradually turning to an acquitance cause our chatting reduced drastically after the pop and, I guess she got fed up of always initiating the conversation.

Me, thinking out loud now, do we really need casual friends? We're in the Era of 4th industrial revolution that is characterized by a range of new technologies fusing the physical, digital, and biological worlds, impacting all disciplines, economies, and industries, and even challenging ideas about what it means to be human.

What I need in my life are (my circle)more mentors and role models that will aid me, get to where I want to be faster and, definitely a gf/fiancee/wife of my own.

When I get bored, I just surf the web from IG to NL to LinkedIn to Quora to YouTube, listen to music or movies and get back to work/studying.

I believe in positive affirmations and I pray too! Thank you for that, I really appreciate.

Shokoloko:
Hello dear, I'm so sorry to hear that you are facing this here.

First off, you need to find a Nigerian whatsapp group in your area. I know each province has a group.

Now you are not making friends, most likely, you have an unfriendly aura, so people can sense the negative energy even when you try.
Fortunately its easy to take care of it. And I will tell you what worked for my son: Go to the mirror each morning and say " I am happy, I am kind, life is good, I am great at making friends, my friends like me, I am the best"
You might need to say this for months until it gets deep in your spirit and then boom.
Now this is something tried and tested for ME and my kids and not something that I read up.

When you go to the stores, or anywhere attempt simple short conversation. Canadians like to talk.....A LOT.

Finally if you are a Christian, talk to the Lord about it. He knows how to put friends (not sexual ones for now, because you re not married) in your path

I wish you the best and just know that there a few impossibilities in this world

It's quite obvious that you've never experienced what I am going through, which is totally fine. Typical naija people reaction to anything they can't relate with. Love and Light regardless.

Oracleforce:
Your brain supposes to tell you that this is a cooked-up story...

Keep fooling yourself

Childofthelord:
It's quite obvious that you've never experienced what I am going through, which is totally fine. Typical naija people reaction to anything they can't relate with. Love and Light regardless.

Lol... I like your response tho

Hey,

1. You are LUCKY to be in BC. By far the best province to live in. Imagine my delight in seeing flowers during 'winter' lol.

2. You have to get friends, physical or virtual. Case in point: I am no longer religious (despite my similarly Christian upbringing). However, I will still attend Christian or Christian-adjacent meetings with people I know online. Especially since Covid.

3. Also before Covid, I used to meet with friends twice a month at a bar. Drag 1 or 2 people you know to a games night, club, etc. These are rife on campus.

4. Work/Volunteer. While in school, I started working and volunteering part-time. Not because of money (that helps too) but to be able to leave the uni bubble, meet people and make new friends. This is how I made friends that were in different age groups.

5. It is not profitable to 'toast' a girl like it is in Nigeria. In my experience, the girls have to be very forthright before I do anything. She literally ahs to be rubbing my hand before I assume that she is interested. Ain't nobody got time to waste or be labeled as a thirsty n-word (just facts).

6. Getting friends now in Uni is a HUGE benefit. It gets lonelier after school.

Good luck girl. Take charge of your life. From acada to social!

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

Childofthelord:
Hi everyone,

My name is Grace, 21yrs, I am in my 3rd year student, pursing a BN degree in Nursing administration (UBC) in Canada. However, since I left Nigeria in 2018, my life never remained the same. Let me start by saying a little about myself.
I come from a Christian home in Nigeria, my parents both attend deeper life.
They are hardcore disciplinarians and prayer warriors. My mum especially, each time i came back from school, my mum searched my bag. I was not allowed to have any social networking apps, not even WhatsApp, my mum always checked my phone. All my parents ever care about is my education and getting good grades. If i am not talking about books, i am not making sense( i was not allowed to attend prom). I had no outfits, just normal clothes and school uniform. I am never allowed to visit friends, go out or have friends over. I spent a large chunk of my time in my bedroom. I do not know how to socialize or communicate with people.
My social life was in bad shape and i never realized it.
I realized that my upbringing and the way i lived my life has really affected me now. I have trouble making friends and even sometimes when people approach me, they go mute after some days, it appears like i cannot keep friends. There are 60 students in my department and i could not make friends with one person, i do not have anyone to check with after an exam or test, nobody checks on me either. I always conatact the professors directly if i have any issues.
To be frank, I did spend 2 years in Unilag before coming to Canada and I had quite a number of friends, many guys were toasting me. I even lost count as some point. But ever since i stepped into this Canada, no guy, i repeat no guy has ever asked me out. white oh, black oh, hispanic oh, nothing. Though i have a number of acquittances but no one to share a drink with or talk about how the day went. This was different from when i was in Nigeria.
Right now I am really trying to make friends but each time i try, the energy is always coming from my end and sometimes they ignore me. I have no best friend, no boyfriend, no padi padi. I believe i have a bright future ahead of me but sometimes i just feel lost with how lonely i get.
Sometimes i feel like there a spirit of loneliness following me, i have no roommates too.
This has not stopped me from doing what i have to do and studying well, but i find it a little disturbing.
Is this normal? for students studying abroad? Maybe I am just different, I dunno.
I am willing to answer any questions?

I can relate with your story to some extent even though my parents are not deeper life goers. I said so because am a natural introvert. Most of the times I like 'me' but some other times it makes me angry that I can't just walk up to a person and strike up a conversation or vise versa. The truth is I have not been to Canada and I have heard that it's pretty lonely out there but no matter how lonely it is, What people read in you first is your countenance and comportment.
Also you should know everyone's story is not same. Only you are there seeing things for yourself so chose the advise you take wisely. Pls don't go out of your ways to make friends.. Cos it will surely end in tears.
If I can make an inference, I think and believe that the "Christian You" is already a natural barrier in the WEST(If you you know what i mean). But don't trade it for friendship
Some have advised you to focus on school and finish first, but I believe that's a very myopic way of doing things cos school is only a part of you and not everything about you and there are ups and downs too... So you need friends surely.

Keep trying or start trying to make friends but open your eyes o!

Anyways am a Christian too and if you don't mind we could chat. I want to send you an e-mail.

Hi I could be your best friend if you don't mind

Hey dear. If you don’t mind my sister is also at UBC you can meet her up and she is also lonely too

Childofthelord:
It's quite obvious that you've never experienced what I am going through, which is totally fine. Typical naija people reaction to anything they can't relate with. Love and Light regardless.

Thank you everyone for the advice and support. Thanks for taking the time to send those encouraging messages too.
I feel better knowing that other people have felt the same at some point in their lives.
My email is also registered on google hangouts, I am always happy to chat a little.
Thanks again.
Grace.

Hello everyone
pls i wish to do a one year masters program in canada.
I av an Hnd certificate in Accountancy
my budget is 5million naira for all expenses for one year
pls how possible is this
any other good/cheap alternative?
Your sincere opinion is urgently needed

freshpzy1:
Hello everyone
pls i wish to do a one year masters program in canada.
I av an Hnd certificate in Accountancy
my budget is 5million naira for all expenses for one year
pls how possible is this
any other good/cheap alternative?
Your sincere opinion is urgently needed

Where Una dey see this money

Childofthelord:
Thank you everyone for the advice and support. Thanks for taking the time to send those encouraging messages too.
I feel better knowing that other people have felt the same at some point in their lives.
My email is also registered on google hangouts, I am always happy to chat a little.
Thanks again.
Grace.

You didn't provide a way to contact you though, what do you mean by your email is registered on Google hangouts? We don't know your email address.

Childofthelord:
Thank you everyone for the advice and support. Thanks for taking the time to send those encouraging messages too.
I feel better knowing that other people have felt the same at some point in their lives.
My email is also registered on google hangouts, I am always happy to chat a little.
Thanks again.
Grace.

My email is also registered on google hangouts, I am always happy to chat a little.
Thanks again.

Unless you comment your email on a follower's comment, they can't get it.

l

Childofthelord:
Apologies, I am not quiet familiar with the Nairaland protocols.
My email is @gmail.com
It will be helpful to let me know you are from this platform.

Grace

Just bear in mind that by putting your email publicly, you're likely to receive a lot of spam in your inbox. I would encourage you to edit your post and write it out this way: a_b_o_m_a_r_v_e_l_l at gmail dot com. Tell them to remove all underscores. Those who are serious about reaching out to you will do so.

@Childofthelord, I sent you a Pm.



Shalom.