₦airaland Forum

transient123:
The proofs you requested for are in the books of tafsir, tafsir ibn katheer is in English if the Arabic could be a little difficult to understand

See, I am not here to argue for or against polygamy, everyone with his/her cross and if you must know, this is my 11th year in wedlock as a monogamist, who is contented with my darling, lovable wife. I am more concerned with screwed interpretations of Allah 's ayat by proponents of polygamy and those who do not. Read my earlier posts in this subject and I don't dabble into frivolities.

If as sincere Muslims, whether in favour or not, that is ones cup of tea, just don't misinterprete ayat with your wishful thinking or thoughts, this is what ahlul kitab do that made them to perpetually sink into manifest error and disbelief.

If we must talk, talk from the cup of knowledge, not from "skyscraper", better, silence is adorable. It is not about how fast our fingers are on the pad or how many likes we get from our numerous online friends whether they understand the subject or not.

Quoting you is germaine to discussions like this because everyone will account for all his/her deeds in the day of accountability, whether those deeds are oral or through actions. Our mouths, hands, eyes, ears etc will all give account. To avoid being quoted, decorum is as well important, tell us succinctly what the Quran, hadiths, tafsir or the ijma of rightly guided scholars say and interpretations.

Thanks for your candid advice to go to bed, in fact, I have done that and already awake before reading it.

Salam alaykum waramahtuhllah.

Please leave me alone. You have not proved anything this are just words from the Internet. Stop assuming being just doesn't have 50 meanings. It's a simple word stop adding 100 to it.

You need prayers.

transient123:
Oh ho, there you go. Please, which scholarly explanation, tafsir, ayat(s) gave the word "just" to connote loving equally? Your answer could put all these fireworks to rest Masha Allah.

Prove that it is not.
Please stop quoting me. no be by force to stay in a polygamous relationship. I disagree with your opinion sheekenah.
Go and sleep

Sissie:
A man can be just. He won't be able to love them equally, however, he can be just. Many men are, I do not know about your society.
@bolded that's just hilarious and untrue.

I do not know your society but there is a problem with the general accession about the mothers hating polygamy, I have met women who like polygamy and prefer it, not everyone wants to play wife every day and others who don't mind it, however, there are those who hate it. the problem isn't with polygamy but the people in it. just the same way we have terrible abusive monogamous homes.

You said what did Allah promise them and answered nothing, there is reward in a well-done polygamy you know. Do you think a man who married
a divorced woman with kids as a second wife and takes the kids won't be rewarded? or a widow?

What is being just if not to love us equally. And I know that a man that one woman cannot satisfy 100 will never satisfy him they will still have gfs because the problem is not with the woman but the man.

Kay17:
It's funny that there is a declaration of Islamic fidelity before one can speak. Nonetheless in order to speak it might be necessary to lie to defeat silence.

I think you misconstrue the intent of the OP. Islam probably created a voice for a wife within a polygamous union. The authorities, Islamic, contemplate a disagreement of a wife with a polygamous arrangement so one ought to explore the options given to the woman

Please don't quote me

my post is not for dull people.

Frolic:
I can't understand a damn thing from this post young lady. Can you pls drink coffee, calm down, then try to come again?

Frolic:
Lol. Chill. Polygamy will still go on no matter how fiercely you decry it. Pls stop d noise young woman

It will go on as long as women keep listening to men instead of reading the quran.
Atleast we can read the quran ourselves now and we have seen how men have made their words the words of Allah.
And she cannot chill until our men start acting like father s.

Sissie:
A man can be just. He won't be able to love them equally, however, he can be just. Many men are, I do not know about your society.
@bolded that's just hilarious and untrue.

I do not know your society but there is a problem with the general accession about the mothers hating polygamy, I have met women who like polygamy and prefer it, not everyone wants to play wife every day and others who don't mind it, however, there are those who hate it. the problem isn't with polygamy but the people in it. just the same way we have terrible abusive monogamous homes.

You said what did Allah promise them and answered nothing, there is reward in a well-done polygamy you know. Do you think a man who married
a divorced woman with kids as a second wife and takes the kids won't be rewarded? or a widow?

Please don't quote me. You are entitled to your delusion and lies.

xage:
Y Tell me which of those statement I mentioned you haven't said..reading them again only made you realized they were wrong and extreme...I always tell people, when it comes to Islam, our interest does not apply

That's why it is not like the rest of the religion, where books are contextualized to favour wanton desires

Please stop quoting me if you like twist my words and the quran for as long as you like deep down you know the truth.

xage:
So, did the prophet call polygamy''wicked as you did? Did the prophet as women to kill their husband for taking second wife as you vow?... Why not remind us all what the prophet say it is?

You can also twist my words to make you feel peace.

Zeinymira:
It was funny and I laughed, big deal?

Sure, you are right about the last part
@sarahade, if you are not married yet then as a Muslim woman you have a right to a marriage contract and you can include it there that you don't want him to marry another wife. It's valid. It's permissible. If he's cool with it then he will sign it.

Thank you sister but how many women know this?
I'm not against any decision to marry more than 1 wife but they should stop tricking women to stay in the marriage and allow themselves to be emotional abused.
If a woman wants to stay in a polygamous relationship she can and if she doesn't want to she can as well leave.

CookieLaVee:
@Sarahade
I used to have a warped notion of Islam before I went for my NYSC. This was not due to the constant violent acts and extremism by most Muslims but because I thought in Islam, women have no opinion in their lives. I have met a hand full of Muslim women, they are either too razz(not a practicing muslim) or too engulfed in their religion that they lack any form of strength to defend themselves even when their lives depend on it.
But I met Zainab during my NYSC, a virtuous Muslim woman, strong spirited and outspoken,yet calm and witty. She spoke out against most ill practises against Muslim women under the guise of religion. I saw a new form of hope and self discovery for Muslim women.

You sort of remind me of Zainab...

Thank you sir.

xage:
Ranting on issue like this shows insensitivity and lack of good culture. This question was well answered from knowledge base and you are telling people how intolerable and desperate you are...In Islam, it is not what you feel, it is what is acceptable. So pls behave

And you too behave and becareful with your words
the answer was biased.
And you are showing how intolerable and desperate men are that they will twist anything inorder to be selfish.
When a man is being selfish it is tolerable and not desperate but if women dares to be selfish about anything it becomes an abomination.
Islam is not what you say it is but what the prophet says it is.

Okeji:
Whose opinion is superior n shld b adhere to? That of Allah n His messenger, or ur own? How can u b so blindfolded wif western cultures at d detriment of ur own faith by ignoring d words of Allah n his prophet? U saw d proofs n u r still arguing, common! I even wonder if u r a true believer or just those types of people who call themselves muslims but never practice islam. My sister, pls is high time u repent n submit urslf to Allah's will cos He made u n can decide to do whatever he wants wif u. May Allah guide us all to d right path

My brother don't you ever question another faith because they have a different opinion.
The prophet never mmade it a command to marry more than one but permissible under a condition be just.
But who can be just sir not even with your children so be careful to stop twisting the prophets words.

[quote author=abusurv post=55557644][/quote]Your story is in the quran abi.

EmmGee:
Okay now i understand you have issues.
Carry your wahala and be goinh

Na you carry wahala come.

drmuri:
salam sister, but after leaving your husband because he married another wife what becomes of you?
you become a divorcée. 80% of divorcée that I know no fit hold body o. so they usually become concubines to rich men, some end up becoming second or third wife , some unfortunately end of becoming what yorubas term " aja adugbo" public dog who is so loose many strange men have sex with her forbs fee or free.
is it therefore not really better for her to be patient and take it in good faith?

My brother call it whatever you like but we know say woman sabi hold body how do i know this I'm a woman.
As for aja adugbo even a married woman can be ajaadugbo(loose) dear.
Its not better to be suffering and smiling dear .
Why can't men take being with one partner with good faith and be patient with her. Hypocrites!!!
Every woman deserve to be happy.

EmmGee:
See painment.
Madam. Keep calm before you kill yourself.

Its with Allah's command you want to drag abi.

Okay good luck

Its Allah's command to be just can you be?
Yes i want to drag.

Okeji:
Whose opinion is superior n shld b adhere to? That of Allah n His messenger, or ur own? How can u b so blindfolded wif western cultures at d detriment of ur own faith by ignoring d words of Allah n his prophet? U saw d proofs n u r still arguing, common! I even wonder if u r a true believer or just those types of people who call themselves muslims but never practice islam. My sister, pls is high time u repent n submit urslf to Allah's will cos He made u n can decide to do whatever he wants wif u. May Allah guide us all to d right path

Please don't ever quote me in your life.
Women take note of the bullying into keeping quite. Only men will attack me fom saying the truth no one can be just.
Mtcheeeeew

Empiree:
You again ehn. hummm

good evening sir.
How are you? Hope you had a great day

Headlesschicken:
saying dat yuh stupid would just be like,stating d obvious,did I in any way mention yuh name,y must u always try to show d world,how stupid u are,mind yuh phucking bixness..

You dont have to mention my name idiot aslong as you are insulting women I'm involved and i would defend them against ungrateful bastards like you that they decided to keep.
Mtcheeeeew

Even if the person is my family i will.
Ive suffered too much to spare any heartless theif.
People have died because of their greed.
Nigeria will be great for our unborn children and we will make sure that the generation that failed us pay for it.
Useless thieves.

Headlesschicken:
D kin dirty wey dey dis Yoruba gals Gagina go fit break c0ndom...Jesu..

You are foolish. you don't have respect for women and where you came through.
FYI I'm from delta.

Ayadeji:
Lolzz. Thanks sis.

You are welcome my sister. Please do not let anyone bully you or make you feel less my sister.
Only a woman knows where it hurt in this matter
A man will never tell you the truth because of their intention.
What has allah promised them for marrying another wife nothing but even told them not to do it if they can't be just but who can be just.
If a man will be just then there's no need for jealousy look at their reply they will never include the condition of being just in their arguments because they want to twist the words of the prophet.
They will come online to tag me shameless use words to bully you and i because they know nothing is holding you in the marriage except you.
If you have to return bride price no problem I'm sure you are yoruba and bride price is something you can afford pay him if you can't i will gladly support you.
A man that 1 woman cannot satisfy 100 will never satisfy him.
Allah loves us equally. After the divorce my sister dedicate your life to him and see if he will not reward you and bless you.
Its difficult to leave but you will never regret it as long as you are hardworking. Allah will always comfort you.
If you want to know more ask any mother who has been in a polygamous relationship and decide if that's the way you want to live your life. Salaam

Its only a wicked man that will marry another wife when he knows his wife will never be happy with it and such a man does not deserve you.
As a good muslimah i will leave the man so i will not sin against Allah by killing both of them.
My sister if he wants to marry he is free and you are free to leave his sorry ass.

AbdelKabir:
I will just copy and paste from shaykh saalih Al-munajjid site, since a similar question (slightly different) was asked there....https://islamqa.info/en/452

Question: My wife and i have discused me having a second wife and she sayes that if i do then she would devorse me.we did not get married by the kafirs but we do have a islamic contract. and there was no agreement on that contract forbiding me from taking a second wife.so my question is .Is it permisable for her to deny me this?And is'nt she making the hallal harram on me. my wife is a good muslimah (I.S.A.) and she would respect a answer whith proof. jazallahkum ma lakair

Published Date: 2000-05-03

ANSWER:

Praise be to Allaah.

If a man is able to marry a second wife, physically and financially, and he can treat both wives in a just manner, and he wants to take a second wife, then he is allowed to do so according to Islam. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“… then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four…” [al-Nisaa’ 4:3]

And this was the practice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and of his Companions (may Allaah be pleased with them), but apart from the Prophet, no one is permitted to have more than four wives.

It is well known that women are by nature jealous and reluctant to share their husband with other women. Women are not to be condemned for this jealousy, for it existed in the best of righteous women, the Sahaabiyyaat, and even in the Mothers of the Believers [the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)]. But women should not let jealousy make them object to that which Allaah has prescribed, and they should not try to prevent it; a wife should allow her husband to marry another woman for this is a kind of cooperating in righteousness and piety. According to a hadeeth whose authenticity is agreed upon, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever pays attention to his brother’s needs, Allaah will pay attention to his needs.”

The first wife’s consent is not a prerequisite for a man to take another wife. The Standing Committee for Issuing Fatwas was asked about this and replied as follows:

“It is not obligatory for the husband, if he wants to take a second wife, to have the consent of his first wife, but it is good manners and kindness to deal with her in such a manner that will reduce the hurt which women naturally feel in such situations. This is done by being kind to her and speaking to her in a gentle and pleasant manner, and by spending whatever money may be necessary in order to gain her acceptance of the situation.”

Concerning her request for divorce if her husband wants to marry another wife, this is a mistake. But they should examine the situation, and if she really cannot cope with living with another wife, then she can ask him for khula’ [ a kind of divorce instigated by the wife, whereby she forgoes the mahr]. If she can cope with living with the second wife, but it hurts her to do so, then she should be patient and seek the pleasure of Allaah. Thawbaan (may Allaah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“No woman asks her husband for a divorce for no reason, but the fragrance of Paradise is forbidden for her.” (Narrated by Abu Dawood and others, and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani, may Allaah have mercy on him).

If she bears it with patience, then Allaah will make it easier for her and will expand her chest (i.e., grant her peace and calm), and will compensate her with something good. The husband must also help her by treating her kindly, being patient with her for any jealousy etc. on her part, and overlooking her mistakes. And Allaah is the source of help.

Fragnance of paradise ke. A woman will be fine without it. Mtcheeeeew

Rilwayne001:
You and these your memes

And you are right @bold. Who knows? Maybe they've been PM(ing) each other and saving face with all these everyday fight between them.

But then, wetin 'consign' me

pm who i no fit be 5th wife o abeg

AbdelKabir:
T is close to R on my keyboard (QWERTY)..... So What's your own excuse? Metal kor, Metamorphosis ni...

My excuse is your new assignment.

Empiree:
My dear sister, kindly take it easy now. This is not befitting you at all. Tune down even if you are upset for any reason. Calm down now. You are beautiful and i am sure you dont want your future husband who perhaps might be reading this see your comments. Someone already admonished up there.

Btw, you never know if he is your future husband. Think about it. Dont you think you might make great couple?. To me, i see compatibility btw you two especially the way you both react to each other. Just calm down and think about it.

Me I don't like the way you are judging this matter o.
Jejekuly I made a comment and he called me kolomental and I gave him the reply that I think he deserves.
I'm actually very beautiful and a nice person he can't handle a woman like me laye laye.
Remove that picture of me and him before my husband to be catch you o.
I'm sorry if my words were harsh it won't happen again.

Ghwx pays.

AbdelKabir:
, she wants to start the only thing she knows how to do without failure...... Insults

Atleast i have you to thank for teaching.pervert