NemoDatQuod:
Tanya.
You just got out of a five year relationship and you are even anywhere close to a guy in terms of whatever? Is all well with you?
What were you doing in a five year relationship? Does relationship equate to marriage for you? Na wa ooo! Five years? Unless you are a runs girl (which you don't come across as ) what the hell are you doing with any man who approaches you unless on the basis that he wants to date you on purpose.

Both of you are deceiving each other. You both are waiting to eat the forbidden fruit before you come to your senses. Leave that guy alone immediately and go about healing yourself. Keep yourself to yourself until a man who is intentional comes along. Teach yourself what it means to be human and you will be ready to be a good and worthy partner. If you continue in this route, next thing is that you will come back here and tell us that one of those drunken nights has resulted in "somebody is on the way". We should not take sacred things and play with them.
Next time, don't go into anything with a guy without intention. Not more than six months. A wedding ceremony is a ceremony. You can still do a wedding in Nigeria with N500K if you guys are not greedy. So, the argument about the cost of wedding ceremony should not come up when a guy who truly wants to understand you for a few months before marrying you come along. Moreover, marriage is not everything. Many have lost their lives for insisting on it, while many are living happy single lives when there is no one to marry them.
Get rid of this guy right away and focus on yourself.
Five years..? Damn!

Thank you for your advice. Your right, I’ll definitely take it on board

Uyi168:
..
you two are confused.

are you fucking, if yes, maybe u should keep things that way. Trying to take it to the next level may ruin it.

Did you read what I wrote? Nobody is trying to take anything to the next level

GreatAchiever1:
What I see is two children who don't know what a relationship is all about but believes because of the mainstream media whatever feelings they can get together at that present time together.
And all these psychology personality nonsense like the mbti, DISA. Personally, I see all those things as nonsense to be honest. But since almost everyone believes in them, it's good to know about it to help study people. But it gets things wrong in how people think, not just on personality. And why would I take a test to tell me about my own personality? Doesn't make sense.

I understand what you mean but that’s just what works for me at the moment, we do everything people do in relationships just without the title I guess. It’s just at agreement but I do agree about the theories part, I just don’t think it’s fair to be judge based of things like that but that’s just the reality I find myself in

Exceed15:
How old are you guys sef?

25 and 26

SharingIsLife:

Forget about modernity claims, if you are getting drunk with ANY African man, he'll never take you seriously in a rship. He'll always have a part of him seeing you as a LovePeddler. This is not necessarily true (though often true), but Africans are not yet modern to that point.

I have some personal advice for you if you want it.

That would be very helpful, I’m open to your advice

I’ve been dating a guy for 2 months, we both agreed on not wanting a relationship as (I had just gotten out of a 5 year relationship and he said he had things he needed to work on himself) but I agreed to date him as he said he would be open minded. It’s been very lovely dating him but he suddenly wanted to call it quits because he thinks I might want more in the future and he’s not willing to give me that. He’s based things off the 5 personality traits (psychological theories- check online) lol, he said I’m not an “agreeable person” and that’s not what he looks for in a woman. I’m so angry cause at no point have I mentioned wanting a relationship with this man but everyweek he feels the need to remind me that it’s not going to happen. We got drunk few weeks ago and he was professing how much he wanted me to his girl but I didn’t take it seriously, we both got drunk again together and I was the one saying how much I liked him, although again I didn’t take it too seriously. I told him in the “future” if it does turn into something serious then I don’t mind and he just said “let’s end things now” (God he was so cold when he said this). This is someone I’ve literally spent every week with, I’m not in love him but yeah I do like him but he was just so cold about it, almost like he didn’t even value me as an individual in that moment. I’m so angry and hurt by this cause it’s just shown he didn’t plan to be open minded about anything at all. I regret getting drunk with him and saying the things I said. He said to me he was doing me a favour and he feels like he’s holding me back from dating other people. He said he would call back during the week as he felt bad about the whole thing but honestly I am so shocked and distraught. I don’t really ask him if he’s seeing other girls or doing things with other people cause I don’t care, the same person is the person that would be asking me if I miss him etc so I’m just so shocked, how do I deal with this when he does call back this week? This is someone I get along with very well and we don’t impose anything on each other.

Hi guys

Please could you follow my upcoming page on Instagram. @letstalkaboutit01


It's dedicated to
Sex and Relationships
Lifestyle
Education
And many more.
Send your stories and dilemmas to letstalkaboutit01@gmail.com

Please support the page thank you. I am also opened to suggestions on how to make my page grow. I'm an upcoming psychologist and would love to help people

Hi guys

Please could you follow my upcoming page on Instagram. @letstalkaboutit01


It's dedicated to
Sex ex and Relationships
Lifestyle
Education
And many more.
Send your stories and dilemmas to letstalkaboutit01@gmail.com

Please support the page thank you. I am also opened to suggestions on how to make my page grow. I'm an upcoming psychologist and would love to help people. This has been a passion of mine.

[quote author=BabaDem post=57242018]Mayb he is tired of u. Guys get tired of a r/ship in many ways of some wch are:
he didn't really love u, and wz after sex wch he hz gotten.. I am in dis position..bt if i want to leave her, on seeing her mood i'll pity her again and we continue fvcking again.. I want her to leave me wen she's tired
U ain't encouraging him, u always demand stuffs frm him
etc... But remember most r/ship goals are nothing compared to mandzukic goal against madrid.[/quote

I don't want to be pitied. He messaged me this morning saying he missed me but I just had to tell him I don't have anything to say. I actually don't feel the same way. There's just too many red flags. I need to thinking carefully of what I want to to do.

Raine80:

You are. Otherwise you would have moved on to much better things instead of worrying about lack of phone calls and why has he not responded. He did this and that, that can you not see how counterproductive all that is?

Harsh way you put it but you do have a point.

kokoA:
You have not been administering his daily BJ dosage properly. No man who is properly sucked behaves that way. Trust me I know what I'm saying.

It's Ramadan. Have some shame please. A guy who acts like that because of sexual act is dumb lol how immature can you get because of BJ

chenzen:
for u to have tabled your relationship issues here says it all... the both of u should grow up abeg!!!!

You had the chance to read and move on to the next page. I said mature advice needed. Clearly your the child that needs growing up because you feel the need to say something. Keep it moving.

Raine80:
You are both emotionally immature. The pair of you reached the crossroads a long time ago it's time to walk in opposite directions.

lol he's emotionally immature. Not me mate.

westlius:
maybe u should check urself because ur man feels u bug him alot Sony may check urself

For somebody who can't even text me that he will be late home, I'll be the one to be reminding him that he needs to be communicating these little things so it won't turn into an argument or misunderstanding. Is that one good? Later he will say I should ask but I'm tired of asking. Just do the right thing

Untanglee I haff come back again ooo

I'm 20 and my bf is 28 but he acts ever so immature. If I make a mistake he makes sure that he must do his own back. He was to travel to Nigeria recently but we had an argument before he left. Even whilst angry I still texted that he should have a safe flight. I also called before he left but it was going to voicemail. He landed in Nigeria and never even called me not until I saw on snapchat the following day. I was so angry. Am I that little in his eyes. No matter what he should have at least said he landed. Every time we argue and the conversation is not going how he wants he just says he doesn't want to talk about it or he will call me ask me a question, expects me to answer it and when I do he will say he wants to get off the phone. Honestly I just count this as disrespect. We can't even communicate effectively as adults and he's older than me. Honestly I'm so angry. His last text to me was "Please I have a lot going through my mind right now and the last thing I want is for you to add to it again. Please and please. "
Can you imagine no call or text since then. Do I even mean anything to him. I'm thinking of calling the whole thing off. I'm tired. Could the age gap be causing problems?

halfricanadian:
Dont giv him nything if he can say he wanna marry nextyr dis yr is kukuma over lerrhim wait till next yr too for sex guys b using marriage to decieve girls nd use nd waste them.

Thank you ☺️

I met a guy few months ago and he was instantly attracted me, he was very nice kind and very overprotective over me, I'm 20 and he's 30, we've had our ups and downs but the problem is I'm a virgin and now he wants to have sex with me, personally I plan on giving it to someone I'm going to marry only but everytime we meet he tries to have sex and I always have to push him off. I haven't seen him in over a month now and he says next time I come round he doesn't want excuses, he promised not to ever leave and he said that he's ready for marriage next year. But I'm scared I don't know if to lose it to him, he's made endless promises never to leave, but I'm still having doubts because people change eventually.

foolinlove:
This guy sounds like an ass.

He gets mad that you won't have sex. He doesnt comfort you when you need it.

Time to move on. You deserve more. You deserve respect.

Thank you for the advice.

Please bear in mind he has called me several times but it is not to apologise and he refuses to apologise. The guy does care about me a lot but it's so hard to over look what he did that night.

Hey guys
I'll just send screenshots of what I wanted to say because it's quite long, please read