she is your girl friend isnt she?and you are not supposed to lie to her,then tell her but dont be rude or nasty about it.

its a good thing u kept u virginity,please keep it till the very end,ur husband and must especially God will appreciate and bless u 4 it.then back to the issue on ground,love and compatibility.i believe strongly(personal opinion)that u can only be in love with someone you are compatible with.as for you present boyfriend if u are not compatible there is no need continuing with the relationship especially sine you already feel it wont last,just break it up and start a meaningful relationship with someone who you are first compatible with and with whom u will eventually fall in love with.i wish you all the best.

If you want to commit suicide,go ahead.its very obvious you have lost your focus and you're confused.if i feel travelling abroad will solve your problem then your problems are just begining.