₦airaland Forum

I hope you don't have mouth odour.

Dangote be like

Make sense

abbey621:
Part 1: How did slavery start in Africa? How did slavery start all around the world? The beginning, one tribe capturing another tribe and selling the strong and healthy ones as slave for profit. These tradition was the same in Rome, Byzantine and all over. In Africa, we fell for the awe of the white men, the greedy kings saw nothing wrong in exchanging captured Africans for weapons and gold. These exchanges continued until the white men wised up and realized they could just take what they wanted by force/colonization. So when Kanye said it all started with mental slavery, he was so f**king right!

Part 2: Slavery in the USA lasted 400 years, not 100, not 200 but 400 freaking years, sure the slaves were forced against their will but after 200 years some bought their freedom, some became prominent members of society. They owned lands, businesses and had money. The funny thing here was that most of the ones that had freedom saw no reason to help their fellow enslaved brothers and sisters. This was the main reason why slavery went on to last 400 years. It could have lasted another 400 years, if Lincoln was not used by a higher being. If Lincoln had not freed the slaves, our black brothers and sisters would never have freed themselves.

Moral of the story: The black race is a race still trapped in mental slavery. You look at the white men genes and genes of the black men and you realize we represent the superior physical and mental traits but our potential is limited by the lack of love for our fellow brothers and sisters. This is what the white men know about us blacks and this is what makes them to continue their dominance over us.....Enlighten yourself and share the knowledge with others, don't hate Kanye, try to understand the deeper meaning!

You said it right.

Everyone been taking this guy literally.
It requires an open mind and free thinking to really understand what he meant..

It's quite unfortunate, Nigeriabs often die in NYSC camp.

Since i left camp, I still wonder what NYSC exactly stand for.
What exactly do we stand to achieve in Man o war drills; we just did it for doing sake anyways.

I also had some health issues while in uyo camp, the medical center is moderately ok but it often run out of supply real quick, I apply to go outside camp to get drugs but all was denied.

I still have strong believe that NYSC will be a productive scheme if corp members are made to partake in (SAED) throughout the program..

Awesome.

greiboy:
God bless the nigga

I am going through every thing he stated now because I am in that age bracket.

I am sometimes totally confused about my own future.

Every decision I take now seems to be very important for my life

I am trying to discover myself In This cruel world of ours

Hello my Name is Timi, there is this whatsapp group I am currently, most people in this group is between this age bracket and we often discuss issues Ranging from Relationship, Youth empowerment and matters of Faith. it is a group for sets of people faced by the same problem. Pls add me on 080797-858-60 if you care to be part of it. It is of much relieve when you are in the midst of Visionary people like you who are also willing to help each other. The group currently has 175 members. I'm very sure you will be highly blessed.

Amidst the shock of "Nigerian Youths are lazy" statement, I recall an article I wrote concerning some of the Problems Nigerian youth encounter and I quickly make a connection..


I'm sure you have heard of African Time, African Jungle and the African Desert. What about the [/i]African Mentality?

Everything African is unique.
In as much as I would have loved not to write about this, it is evident that thinking about my race should be so much more of a personal concern to me as any other topic. I love myself and I'm very proud to be a black man; but then, there is this proposition I heard people talk about and I wish to talk about it too. It's popularly known as [i]"African Mentality".

It's very funny to me when i see a mad man call another mad man a mad man; in fact, one need to be frank with the truth when it comes to the topic "African Mentality" because It has become an assertive statement on the lips of the gongs, and the black man himself can't help but begin to accept this status.

There are 3 African Mentalities imprinted in the Gene of most Africans, I'm not quite sure if the black man himself is conscious of this, but the trait still stand and evident in most people I've met; including myself.



(1) The Bigmanism mentality (Big - man - ism)

Seen in the history, stories and movies. The Black society so much celebrate and respect the opulent ones while totally disregarding the destitute. To me this is somehow evident in all race; at least to some extent, and I won't put too much importance on it's existence in Africa, but the degree to which respect is given to the opulent in Africa is unreasonable.

In the South West Nigeria where I come from, a common saying goes thus "Owo lole she ongbogbo" , "Olowo n soro talika ni o n ni idea" which translate to mean, " Money does all" , "The opinion of the poor doesn't count where the rich speaks" which also mean " No idea is worth a million dollar" or " Money is the idea" or "Idea is obsolete where money exist". Well, while it's not my job to trace the etymology of such phrase, it is my job to notice the effects such belief may have on my life and my environment.
Even though it is only a natural phenomenal for the wealthy to often show off their wealth to oppress the destitue, it is also a survival instinct to the destitue to join the clique of oppressors if he has just been upgraded from an average citizen to a high class.

In Nigeria where I come from, people immediately change their lifestyle to that of a Bourgeois, right from the way they talk to the way they relate with others just as soon as the millions hit their account. Isn't that amazing?

(2) The making it before anyone else mentality.

My father would say "All the people I see around me seems to be an athlete" Because everyone is running to nowhere.

Instead of trying to be better than himself, the competitive spirit of the black man make him feel he need to be successful before his brother. Maybe it's a biological survival instinct to avoid been oppressed by his brothers Bigmanism mentality, maybe not.

This way of thinking is connected to so many social crimes that are evident in the African society today. Crimes such as Internet fraud ( which is common amongst the young ones), Mammon ritualist, Political Gullibility e.t.c it all look like Money drives the Ego and the Ego drive the community.

(3) The international Mentality

This is the most alarming of them all. Everyday thousands of Africans are dieing to travel abroad; take me literally, they died just to be in another man's land, searching for lost fortune and greener pastures.

Mostly youths, embark on this journey to escape the economic hardships of their domiciliary and in the process are later been faced by the dead end around the Libyan soil and deep down the Mediterranean Sea. The cause/problem may be traced to poor leadership structure, political indecency, insurgence e.t.c.

However, No one is willing to take control of the situation. Procurement of solutions could be done through the introduction of several schemes targeting the appraisal of human resources using channels such as Skill Acquisition and Youth Empowerment programs, zero interest loans, working educational and housing systems e.t.c
The main reason why the Government has been unable to curb the International mentality movement is quite unclear, but it is most likely they have also been infected with the factors of this mentality themselves.

While some don't see the Sahara desert or the Mediterranean sea as an escape root, it is still in the desire of every 8 in 10 Africans to travel out of their country either to study, Work or just play around.

It is well known that the Jewish money don't go out of the Jew community unless it's been used by 12 other Jewish. It's not the same in Africa, the wealthy or Average Nigerian prefers to purchase foreign items than a locally developed one, thinking he is getting the best for himself. All this still boils down to the international Mentality.


I am concerned because I feel the road to self development and successful life as an African lies in the cleansing of ones mind from this 3 factors. While I am not totally condemning the mentalities, I am only trying to arrange the broken mirrors and let people see a complete picture of who we really are.

"It is eating up the spirit of my race, it is knocking down the love for myself"

~Oyatomi Timi

No wonder Lucky Dube cried in his song Born to Suffer " You gotta watch out my son if your father doesn't care for ya, You gotta watch out my son if your mother doesn't care for ya, kwashiorkor is there and it's going to attack ya".

The kwashiorkor of Bigmanism, Arrogantism and Internationalism.

Original Source:http://www.theysg.com/2018/04/3-african-mentality-you-need-to-get-rid.html?m=1

Lalasticlala

E make sense Playboy.. dey make people head hot you hear.

Nah only vision less fine girls go message you, ones wey go suck your blood.

Awesome.

It's not been easy.

Time is the biggest barrier for me.

agbonkamen:
I learnt they are demons with long sword

Nnaee I cannot say specifically what the long sword is, but I can categorically tell you that there is something long you will enjoy along the way..

Awaitingkopa:
My own husband Shuld locate me fast too ooo
Pls pm me if Ure ready and interested too.
Must b handsome

My sister, switch on your GPS.

agbonkamen:
are you a biafran I no want Yoruba demon o

you don't understand what good impact Yoruba demons can have in your life.. I promise you, our first baby is a beautiful handsome cute boy.

agbonkamen:
I need a husband i need a black king, who is beautiful and hansome

Seems that look like a perfect match of me.

Nice one sisi Linda.

FrankTalk1:
No you don't need to drop out of school.

When I was in the University years back, I did several businesses part- time and still graduated in flying colours.

What if I'm studying the wrong course,
I have poor grades and I have a good startup idea?

This one could have been a more useful person here in Nigeria. Only if he is willing to empower himself.

Can i drop out of University to fully focus on Business?

mrjojo:
Hmm, this is very sensitive, a child life and future is at stake.

You are somewhat precise with the age, I'm 26.
I already understand her emotions but it's quite painful no-one wants to understand mine.. It's a cruel world though and that doesn't baffle me..
It's a long story if I decide to explain why we can't date anymore or marry, but honestly at this point I know what's good for me.
I have a startup, I have a 9-5 job which implies I have a career to run after. All this things are distractions.. Although I have been able to curb it to some extent buh bliv me a day will not pass by without thinking about it.. It's such a big distraction..

If I keep such lady beside me during my journey, it's a double distraction because we all know what baby mama's are capable of, especially when they know you can't tossed them one side.. They become a bone in the throat and disturb ur freaking life everyday, she is a potential bone in the throat by attitude and I can't afford to take her along.

Assuming I'm ready to get married next year or upper one, it's a different thing entirely.. But with this little time we spent together sef, I know what she has made me gone through not to talk of having her as a full wife..

I will do the needful, may God help us all.
Stay Blessed.

sisisioge:
Stop trying to handle the issue by yourself. Get your parents involved. Let them come extending olive branch like they would just be there to care for the boy while she does her thing and can come for him anytime she pleases. This will solve the village dump she plans for him. Whatever you do, don't antagonise her lest she takes him away spitefully.

It is well.

Gracias .

prestigiouslady:
I wish you all best.

I really appreciate the kindness of the time spared.
You shed spotlight on this issue of my life..

I know a good advice when I see one and I will work towards it all. Even though we are both that lone survivor but still, we need each other. My parents frown at this too, but you know, "a bad child should'nt be sent on an errand in which he will not return" something that prompt the support from my family.

I will try arrange a conversation between my family and hers, at worst case a conference call because of the distance.

I have offered her what I can, financially and psychologically by taking full responsibility and staying by her through the thick times of gestation.. It is not something I really prepared for and cost me alot of sweat and time. But I'd sacrifice that to correct the mistakes and to set a breeze of peace. I was initially advised to deny the pregnancy or even give her money for abortion but I still prefer to keep the law of nature standard because I know that's the only way to have my full reward. I might also never remain the same psychologically if I don't make smart moves henceforth. I hate to let her go but I have already start a fresh journey.

God bless you and I will definitely keep it posted here on whatsoever that comes out of this.

Eketem:
Go and report her to social welfare in the local government secretariat.

As much as a mother is favored in custody issues best interest of the child is more important, she is not working for the child's best interest.

They will make you have a legal lasting arrangement

Thanks, this is the sort of opinion I was seeking.

cococandy:
You have as much right over the child as she does. Don’t let your child grow up without you because of marriage issues. I know that’s what this is all about. At the same time I can’t advise you to marry her because you both have a child together.
Just talk it out with her. If it’s not working, involved third parties. You people have to reach an agreement that’s favorable to the child. She can get a job near you or vice versa.

I can’t say I don’t understand where she’s coming from. But I don’t support her taking him with her.

Thank you, I totally understand that and I will try that out.

prestigiouslady:
Dear poster,
Your baby mama is a bag of emotions right now, she loves her son, and at the same time, she's thinking of her future, things like what will happen now? How's my future going to be? Will this man marry me? Can I trust him enough to leave my child with him? Won't my family do a better job of taking care of my child than his?? one of her biggest fear now is insecurity, fear of the unknown, of the future

If you can, why not try to get a job at your town of residence?? no matter how little to let have something doing now? Probably do not cohabitate, let her get an apartment in town so that you both can think straight if you really want to take the "relationship" to the next level.

Have you seen her parents? Not for marriage but for acknowledgement that you were the one that impregnated their daughter?
Let her know your plans for her both on the long run and short run...You can't just have a free woman doing Wifey duties in your house without doing the proper things..

I really think this goes beyond her leaving with the child alone
...ten month plus of living with you and you're not talking about "us", maybe she just feels tomorrow isn't 'certain' but will be preferable to the " vision less" today.

Thank you very much.. I really understand this are her feelings.. I already sit her down to ask her what the plan is and she Wouldn't give me any tangible answer. I ask her if she would like to further her education or I should give her little cash to start a petty business still there are no tangible answer. I guess she is totally confused though. But I don't want such confusion to extend to the boy.. A confused person is bound to make terrible decisions and that is what I'm trying to prevent all over again.
The truth is we already made terrible decisions and I have been really sincere with her all from the start, I made it clear to her that we can't get married, there can never be us, even when I understand fully that this is against her love language. I know it's too early to tell her that but the earlier the better.. I ask her to face the truth And move on with life as I still have nothing less than 9 years to tie the knot. She is the lady and we all know she wouldn't wait till such ridiculous time.

I don't want to see any of her family because they initially rejected me. I only have business with her for now and whatsoever communication will be between us.

I want the child with me, rather than with her family. I will give her the support I can render.. But I think she feels her only ticket to what she wants from me is to have the child with her, but that is blackmail and will never work for me.. I will eventually neglect the two of them if she eventually leave with the boy forcefully.

eniolorunfe:
A woman needs SECURITY!!! Put a ring on it and you go begin to dey get mouth as it relates to your "baby mama" and son. The last time I checked, it's not compulsory for baby mamas to stay with their baby fadas (whatever that means ) , it's only compulsory for WIVES to stay with their HUSBANDS!

she is free to go anywhere she wants to.. i am more concerned about the child.

i have been giving financial and psychological support for more than a year, what more security did she seek again?

kimbraa:
Who said there isn't much you can say? Haven't you been responsible for the child before and after birth? You sound like a soft hearted person, and that's probably why she's been threatening to go away with the child when misunderstandings ensure. You're much the child's parent as she's. On that note, tell her sternly not to think of running with your child, but you can choose to be quiet if you're not doing what is required as a father 'cause it's one thing to father a child, but another to act like it. That said, why can't she get a job at her current place of residence since you've both been cohabiting?

Funniest thing is she wanted to abort it back then and i talked her out of it..
The fact is, enough mistakes had been made and i want to be sure mistakes don't continue to happen, this is more reason i have been taking things gently with her.. i took the responsibility ever since day 1

madridguy:
Your baby mama is totally confused at this moment. Do you think the village people won't ask for the whereabouts of the father of the child? I'm sure she will soon call you to come and carry your baby.

like totally confused, and im also confused at her level of confusion.

MichaelBukamzy:
Try more to convince her.hope they are well fed and taken care of

of course they are well fed.. i even make sure she delivers the baby in a private hospital jst to avoid any complications.

thorpido:
What about your family?Can your mum or grown sister take care of the baby?

Yes, my family wants to take care of the child but she is just the problem..