₦airaland Forum

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I cannot but describe my long struggle to making sense of the many things that bedevil our society. Sometimes, people think I've gone nuts. It is so difficult to reconcile what we have with what is normal and to mess things up, anger is not an option because we are all a part of many of these wrong things. We must not rest until we've made them right.

Let me begin with the account of the chairman of my estate's motorcycle riders popularly known in this part of the world as ‘Okada’. Before he ascended the throne (yes the throne!) as the chairman of motorbikes operators in our estate, he was an active rider. By whatever yardstick that was employed, he became the chairman and your guess is as good as mine, he stopped riding bike, resumes to the park every day in a well starched and ironed native clothes with fitting shoes and cap to match. Not only that he no longer rides bike, he now feeds from the sweat of those he is leading. At the chants of "the Shia" (short form of "the chairman", the other riders know who to pay their daily due which is Mr. Chairman’s daily take home. Don't search too far, you will see the same model across the length and breadth of Nigeria.

What we call leadership in this part of the world is nothing but despicable big-man syndrome which I call hoaxes of leadership. We identify supposed leaders by looking around for the man or woman sitting on the biggest chair, the man or woman who some overzealous protocol officers or orderlies are clearing the road for, beating, humiliating and dehumanizing the people he or she is supposed to serve. Well, many of these supposed leaders don't even know that service is the essence of leadership.

I once entered a church, one of the leading churches in Lagos and an organization that is leaving no stone unturned in the cause of institutionalizing quality leadership and I found that the entire pastorate sits on the same type of chair as the congregation. The lead pastor went on to note that it was deliberate because leadership isn't a contest of superiority with subjects. You will be amused by the king-sized and well-cushioned chair that some leaders seat on while their followers are zeroed to some uncomfortable wooden chair, some perhaps can't even find a seat and the supposed leader won't even care.

Some governors or even local government chairmen will not drive around town without mobile police officers or armed soldiers whose job will be to inundate other road users, skew them off the road and leave them bruised. Is that leadership? We once read about a priest who was removed because he won't honor the first lady of the state with the usual rousing recognition and front seat offer. Let us suggest that this story never happened and is only a subject of fiction, you and I know that the possibility of it happening anywhere in Nigeria is not near zero.

I cannot express how amused I was when a man who was being interviewed on TV was introduced as "Mr". The man took to the microphone to correct the presenter that he is not "Mr." but elder. To him, if the title is not gotten right, the conversation cannot continue and will not hold the same weight. What can be more hoax than that? People who understand the structural separation that exists between title and leadership find no offense in addressing their president as Mr. Donald Trump or Donald Trump as the case may be regardless of the age difference.

Sometimes ago, the leader of Papua Guinea allocated huge resources to pay for super-fast Maserati cars for a summit that will only take days all in a bid to honor leaders who will be participating in the summit. Each of the cars cost over a hundred thousand dollars. This is a nation that is bedeviled with polio and intense poverty.
I believe it is time we came to the understanding that a leader does not have right to a resource that has not gone round his subjects, a leader does not have right to eat when those he leads are dying of hunger, a leader does not have right to luxuries of good beddings in some hilltop cave when his people have nowhere to put their heads. I wonder how some leaders will make face before their creator while explaining that they used the money meant to provide basic amenities like food, shelter, and security to buy fleets of armored vehicles for their selfish self.
We are so used to this pseudo-leadership system that when a leader eventually sends down crumbs from the resources he has been enjoying, he is hailed with the songs of Messiah. Someone who has monopolized the right to standard living!

We must rise above the template of hoax leadership handed over to us by early days colonialists. The colonialists came to impose their erroneous superiority on us. That template has nothing to do with genuine and acceptable leadership, so it must be jettisoned. A leader is only a primus inter pares, that is, first among equals. The first position does not by any means nullify equality.
How will you treat people when you eventually get to that desired leadership position? Yes you, how will you treat your followers?
Leadership is sacrificial and it comes with great responsibility. Anytime service is alienated from leadership what is left of leadership is nothing but a hoax.

source: www.loftycentre.com.ng

I'm compelled to bemoan our sense of comprehension across many platforms. We sincerely need to cultivate the habit of reading between the line.

What Aregbe was actually saying here was partaining to his budget. He was trying to justify whatever big budget was presented. He was not in any way pitying the prisoners.
So it's still the same story of 'dem dem'.

He was saying "look, you people should be grateful that our budget is this small, go to America and see how much they spend in taking care of one prisoner.

When it comes to expenditure and tax generation, they compare Nigeria to America but when it comes to value delivery, budget performance, they leave Nigeria to the hands of God

This one is definitely not hungry

Dear op,
I've gone through your story most keenly. I beg to differ with those who feel you have made a wrong choice. I feel and perceive that you have a huge assignment to be done in your wife's life. The only reason I can't say that God brought her your way is because I don't know the process of your coming together.

As someone had rightly said, I implore you to understand that your wife is suffering from some sought of psychological disorder and will need you greatly to walk through the healing process.

That woman needs your help than she need your judgement. Yes it will be hard work. But thats love for you. Love demand commitment and yes, don't mind all these divorce advocates. You can walk with her for her healing process.

TIMIDITY IS A MONSTER, KILL IT!

Tade needed to see the Dean of his faculty. He kept pacing the corridor of his dean's office without really knowing what to do. Whether to form a James Bond, exert some boldness, make a knock and walk into the office or simply keep pacing the floor praying for some miracle. He chose the latter.

In his newly found work-out of pacing and waiting, a smart looking dude walked up the stairs, made a knock and received a "come in" response from within, he entered and got attended to. That was three hours after Tade had been pacing. Apparently, the door was closed but not locked. Tade, out of his timidity did not try to enter. He enjoyed watching the door to see if someone will go in or come out.

Timidity is being fearful and hesitant. It's an expression of lack of confidence. An expression of fearfulness in venturing into new and unknown places or activities.

Timidity if not dealt with can make someone to keep missing opportunities and be kept in the lowest ebb of life. It can make one to keep receiving the fatal blows of fate. Timidity is a monster, building a healthy self confidence is the hammer with which timidity can be nailed.

Confidence is the capacity to put up the impression of certainty and stability. Confidence is not the absence of fear but subjection of fear to the backstage of the mind. Confidence will give you that edge in approaching issues, tasks and people without hesitation and anxiety. You must be determined to always move towards life and not away from it.

People will always follow those who appear to be sure of themselves. You need to stop giving away your power to people by being hesitant or by being fearful.

Good enough to hear, the art of confidence can be mastered.

1. Know as much as you can on your subjects of concern and even those of less concern. Knowledge is power, it will go a long way in boosting your confidence. How much you know appears in how you carry yourself and approach issues. Make learning by all means a standard and a way of life.

2. Appear confident. Be well groomed, neat and look great. Be sure you like what you see when you look into the mirror. You will be amazed at how even undergarments, how you smell, how neatly cut your nails are and so many intangible part of grooming affects your self confidence. It can be as vain as starting from the fragrance of your bath soap. Just do everything that will make you love yourself and be proud of you.

3. Conclude that you are not inferior. No man is created to dominate another man, those who are dominated are those who subjected themselves to being dominated. Let your state of mind be built on the fact that you are not inferior. When you make yourself belief you are inferior, you get anxious and nervous facing or dealing with issues and people. Be highly confident about yourself and what you can do. Be positive minded and be certain that your actions will turn out positive. Of all the judgements we pass in life, non is more important than the judgement we pass on ourselves.

4. Engage the spirituality of confidence. Man is no doubt a spiritual being. Man, as the center of the universe simply long for peace and harmony with existence. The spirituality of confidence prescribes that there is a superior entity other than man that has gotten your back any time. The spirituality of confidence has to do with what or who you have some trust in. For instance, if you believe in God, you draw confidence from Him and He becomes your source of peace and harmony with self and with everything in the universe. This reflects in the way you carry yourself and approach issues.

Timidity has robbed you enough, it's time to deal with it. kill it!

Leke Ademola-kay
www.loftycentre.com

THE DYNAMICS OF VICTORY

Victory is achieved at the point of decision & only manifested at the point of action.

There is a logical relationship between outcomes and processes. Everyone longs for victory and happy ending, but only a few understands the logic behind it.

First, let me take you through a bit of biology. That you missed or hates biology classes back in school notwithstanding, you will understand. The essence of reproduction is the production of an offspring! Take the amazing life cycle of a beautiful butterfly as an example. Remember that the life cycle of a butterfly starts with the laying of eggs. The eggs hatches into caterpillar, a worm-like creature which develops into chrysalis. Science calls this developmental process complete metamorphosis.

Here is the gist, the butterfly starts by laying very small eggs. This small eggs can be likened to the decisions we make day by day. Just as the quality of the egg laid determines the eventual outcome of a butterfly's life cycle, the quality of our decisions and what we do with our decisions determines what happens in our lives.

The cycle of victory is initiated at the point of decision and quality decision followed by quality action will give birth to victory. I'll give you an example in that interesting narrative of the prodigal son. For the sake of this piece, let's nickname him 'Gee'.

You see, Gee had a happy ending but the happy ending was initiated at the point he took the decision to arise and return to his father. In Gee's voice, he said "I will get up and go to my father" (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parable_of_the_Prodigal_Son). The narrative continued by saying that Gee actually arose and went to his father.

If you say you will, you better do! To say the least, your decisions must be backed with actions. Today's Tides of Transformation is calling your attention to the strength of your decisions. You must pay attention to your decisions, make quality decisions and watch yourself coast to victory.

The Tides of Transformation is turning ,make it turn to your favour by making quality decisions backed with quality action.

You will win! Your victory will be widely proclaimed

Leke Ademola-kay
www.loftycentre.com

No Sense Of Urgency?

It is a beautiful thursday from this part of the world. Today's Tides of Transformation poses a question to you. The question calls for urgent attention, deep reflection and quick action!

One of the people that work with us at Lofty Transformation Centre, let's call her Han. A fantastic project handler. Call her a perfectionist and you won't be wrong. She will carry out tasks in such manner that her work always turn out very good. But there is an Achilles's heel that makes her our last resort when there is a job to be done; you can't trust her to deliver on time. As a matter of fact, by the time she is through with any task given to her, we would have made use of available alternative.

At our meetings, I've had cause to ask, what is the essence of a brilliantly executed task that has lost its relevance? No matter how beautifully delivered a task is, if it is not available at the time of need, all the time and resources spent on such task is a gallant waste. Sense of urgency is the urge to deliver results "on time". It is knowing what is important to be done now and doing it now.

Han's disposition is typical of Nigeria's business clime. As blessed as we are with deeply rooted artisans and technocrats, it appears our artisans are more professional on delaying the delivery of a project than we are in getting the job done. If a Nigerian tailor tells you that your cloth will be ready in two weeks, it will be safe for you to add an extra two weeks to save yourself of unnecessary rise in blood pressure.

What is the essence of a fire fighting squad arriving when the house has completely been razed? Sometimes, when you are late, you are no longer needed. So it is not always better late than never!

Relate the aforementioned illustrations to your personal lifestyle and personal disposition to life. Do you couple your dexterity with being on time? Do you arrive for your appointment on time or have you been noted to always keep people waiting (wasting) for you? Today's reality is that businesses and organizations that refuse to move fast will get run over and if it is people that runs organizations, it is people who must sit up. A personal sense of urgency is a key ingredient to personal effectiveness.

There are those who are ever ready, there are those who are never ready. Where do you stand?
People who make things happen do so with every sense of urgency.

If its needed now, then it must be delivered now.

You can make the Tides of Transformation turn to your favour. Make necessary adjustment and watch yourself take back your place in relevance.


Leke Ademola-kay
www.loftycentre.com

BETTERING THE GOOD

On this beautiful Thursday morning, I will remind you of one of the beautiful nursery rhymes we recite while growing up. I think those who belong to the group where you don't have to put your hand across your head to determine if your hands will reach your ear should know this rhyme.

It says "Good, better, best, I will never rest, until my good is better and my better best" perhaps if many of us knew this rhyme is a philosophical root to staying quite ahead, we would have recited it with all seriousness. What does a little kid know you ask? I ask too, considering the way we murder, mutilate and mime the concept of nursery rhymes.

Look around you and see how we've taken the good as our norm and how many live on that for the rest of their lives. The man who comes up with a means for doing or producing anything better, faster or more economically has his future right at his fingertip said John Paul Getty.

If you doubt John Paul's submission, then consider how we used to make calls only with Nitel, send messages or letters at Nipost, listen to radio from some big Kenwood box and watch TV via some big wooden cupboard box that glories in displaying black and white images. Oh I forgot to add, you only start watching by 4pm everyday.

Guess what? Things have changed, things have really changed and the changes are birthed from understanding the need to get ahead. Bettering the good is premised on the consciousness to constantly move forward and improve on existing achievement. Those who show little or no commitment to bettering their good will eventually be left behind.

The future belongs to those who can think on how to improve on products, processes and services. The moment something better than the good appears, good enough will cease to be good enough. Listen, poor performance and poor results can by no means be justified because the market only pay extraordinary reward for extraordinary performance.

Bettering the good is serious work. Better thinking is it's cover cloth. Your most powerful ability is your ability to think. Our greatest investments are the investments we make to expand our mental capacity.

Everyone starts at the bottom but those who give their all to bettering their good everyday and in every way are those who reach the top and they are never left behind.

The good news is that your good can be made better, your better be worked upon to become best. This is the way to go!

#tides of transformation will always be in favour of those who will never rest on their oasis until their good become better and much more better.

Leke Ademola-kay
www.loftycentre.com

THE BEHAVIOR OF ROYALTY

Its another beautiful morning. Today's Tides of #Transformation will address the behavior of royalty. You see, the waves of transformation is so pronounced that you can't afford not to flow with it.

What transformation does is to prepare us for royalty, not just prepare us but grant us seamless access to living in the reality of royalty. Luckily, in this age, living in the reality of royalty not an exclusivity of royal families, it is absolutely up to you.

The one in rags and tattered conduct will not be allowed into the hallowed chamber, inner court of life, life is like that! From the beginning of time, society has existed in strata. We have the haves, the have less and the have not. The haves want little or no interference from the have less or the have not. Some argues that there is actually no one in the category of the have not, they premise their arguement on the fact that anyone will always have something, no matter how little. Do you agree?

Well, the point here is that transformation qualifies you for the inner chamber, where the haves reigns, and in this inner court, there is an expectation on who you should be and the manner of conduct. Those without the royal aura of Grace oozing out of them will not be granted access, and if the game of chance played itself out, they will be thrown out by thesame chance.

Let me delve a bit into the color of royalty as the token for the behavior of royalty. It will help you understand the soberness of what it takes to be of the inner hallowed chamber. As a trained psychologist, I've dedicated a lot of my time to the perception and psychology of color. It will be no news that purple is regarded as the color of royalty.

The color purple screams rarity having it's ties only with kings and queens and it's reservations only for the upper crust. The reservation was so pronounced that between 1558 and 1603, Queen Elizabeth I forbade anyone but close relatives of the royal family to wear purple.

The color creates a balance between the calmness of blue and the loud vibrancy in color red. Purple symbolizes authority, kingship, wealth and royalty. It represents nobility, luxury, power, creativity, wisdom, dignity, grandeur, peace, pride and responsibility.

Should we then go about wearing purple all week long or probably change our entire wardrobe so we can be nicknamed purple? No! But we can act purple without wearing purple. We can speak and look royalty - there are languages and slang alien to royalty. We can stand and let our shoulders communicate courage, we can sit and carry ourselves with huge sense of sensitivity. We can make our adornment scream royalty - whatever makes any man or woman dress at all times like someone morning is definitely not from God. We can walk with elegance and exhibit Grace.

Royalty connotes living a lifestyle of courteousness and consciousness. It is not rocket science and it is not thesame as a lifestyle of vain unaffordable expensiveness. It is just not for lazy and carefree people. Its inside of everyone, looking within and living it all out is all that is required to make the tides turn in our favor.

Royalty don't just recognise royalty, royalty look out for royalty. The next time I see you or hear from you, I hope to hear the verbaless but deafening scream of royalty all over you.

Leke Ademola-kay
Head, Transformation Intelligence Unit,
Lofty Transformation Centre
www.loftycentre.com

FROM ZERO TO HERO

This morning, I'll make you remember your mathematics teacher. There are two things I remember about my mathematics teacher, his barks of "find X" and his supreme court-like verdict of sentencing us to six strokes of the cane for not doing an assignment. That pronouncement of six strokes will usually have the impact of being sentenced to six years jail term with hard labor.

My post secondary school experience has really made me to wonder what the essence of looking for x up and down was really about. I think it is safe to conclude that it is all about mind expansion and qualitative reasoning.

In all equations, the X you are asked to find will eventually come out of that equation. But you won't find it until you've solved the corresponding puzzles. Life itself is a puzzle, albeit with so much treasure in it. Those who locate the treasures of life are those who have found purpose. Let purpose be X , the point you are able to find X, you have located the treasures in your own life.

Hang on a second, let's do a simple arithmetic! Pick a figure, add zero to it, what did you get? Here is an example, 59 + 0 = 59. It is suffice to say that "the only thing that doesn't add anything to an equation is a zero". Yet, becoming a hero from a zero is a must solved puzzle.

How then do you move from a zero to hero? How do you become the champ in your field of endeavor or in the least of expression, your desired field of endeavor? The way up from zero to hero is to become a person of value. Its a less traveled path because becoming a person of value comes with a price. Warren Buffet said, price is what you pay, value is what you get.

To move from zero to hero, you must be driven and addicted to a value addition mentality. It will make you to consistently ask yourself "what am I bringing to the table?". If I'm bringing nothing, then I'm not changing anything. As a father, as a mother, husband, wife, friend, brother, sister, neighbour, colleague, employee, employer, boyfriend, girlfriend, what are you bringing to the table?

A zero becomes potentiated at the point it picks up a value to add to the system. The system responds by rewarding with the status of a hero. A common cause of stagnation is your 360 degree sense of entitlement. Everywhere you turn, you want to get, get, and get. How about giving, giving and giving?

Not even prayer absolves anyone the responsibility of adding value. You won't become a hero by the chants of "I receive it". You can make the tides of transformation turn in your favor, become someone that always have something to add to the equation.

Another hero is birthed. Thats you.
This month, your efforts will yield bountiful results.

www.loftycentre.com

THE RECIPE FOR CHANGE

HAVE you wondered why changing seem difficult? Have you thought about how to simplify the process of changing an old way of life to a new and more profitable way? You are not alone. Everyone have a part that want to stay in the comfort zone of the old order. Of course, there is no point changing a winning formula but if an old order is no longer profitable, then it must be changed.

There is a particular country in Africa whose people cannot imbibe the simple order of joining the queue and wait for their turn or simply make use of a pedestrian bridge, why? Because they are so used to the old ways and find those ways most convenient. Yet, the country is governed by a group of people who rode to power on the mantra of change.

Change should not just be by chants or by mere sloganeering. Change must come with deliberate attempt on the modification of behaviour. That is, if true and sincere change is what you seek, you must rise up to it and take responsibility. The call to becoming a better person cannot be complete without an individual making crucial amendments to his or her way of life.

For instance, someone on a mission to lose some weight must be ready to work on what and when he or she eats and such individual must be ready to do some physical exercise no matter how difficult (and it will be difficult at the beginning). The easy path is choosing to do nothing and guess what? It's the most threaded path. Again, Warren Buffet's saying comes to mind, "price is what you pay, value is what you get".

In today's tides of transformation, we shall discuss the recipe for change; the procedural formula for achieving change.

David Gleicher in the 60s was the first to propound the formula for change. This formula was further worked upon by Kathie Dannemiller. The formula states that change will be achieved only when:
1. There is dissatisfaction with how things are
2. There is vision of what is possible
3. Steps to be taken towards the vision are clearly stated.
4. A product of the three above must be greater than any resistance in sight.

So when these three factors are in place and well fortified, change is imminent. However, if any of the three factors is missing, then the chants of change will end in chagrin; frustration and dissapointment.

Yes, it is good to say I want to change but we must go ahead to move the potency in our lips to our limbs and change what needs to be changed.

Let's get back to that African country whose chants of change was everywhere during the build up to their general election and take a keen look using the lens of our discussed formula !
1. Was there an expression of dissatisfaction with status quo? Yes!
2. Was there a communication of vision for what is possible? Yes, with the multitude of promises.
3. Were steps to be taken towards the vision clearly stated? Well, from clear indications, one cannot be too positive on that!
4. Are there resistances? Oh, obviously more than envisaged! And because one of the three factors are missing, the force of resistance has being quite weighty.

Was there a change? Yes, in leadership but not in attitude, behavior and general ways of doing things. What lesson is there for you? As a person going somewhere, you can't afford to just go about with the chants of change. Changing the old for the new is serious business. You must clearly state the steps you need to take and take them. You must be open to change and be positive about change - positive change of course.

With the necessary factors in place, you will make the tides of transformation to turn to your advantage.

Yours in Transformation
Leke Ademola-kay
www.loftycentre.com

FIX THE MISSING LINK

On today's tides of transformation, let's muse on the need to fix the missing link. You will notice that our series on tides of transformation are all calls to action and not just an appeal unto emotion. They are calls unto responsibility. You see, its a simple logic, decisions and actions are crucial to the success equation. To cross to the other side of the river, simply build a bridge or get a boat. No amount of tears or appeal to the river can get you to the other side.

To some, the only time the word "resolution" resonates in their ears and mind is at the beginning of the year. They only know about "New Year resolutions" and many of those resolutions are usually dead on arrival. Reason? Well, you be the judge!

Of a truth, you can't be a fair judge in a matter not well spread before you. You need the facts of the matter to judge right. Many of those resolutions are dead on arrival because there are no "hows" (strategic plans) and "when" (time frames) attached to them. And of course, the new year never stay new, we are in the middle of June already.

Attaching systematic processes, being clear on what you really want done and putting a time frame will transform your resolutions to smart goals. Guess what, time is very inconsiderate. It just keep going. If you don't seize the moment, moments will just keep slipping away. We live in a world where each minute in another minute is a past.

Goals do not set themselves, human beings set goals and as such, we do not assess goals, we assess the one who set the goals. So it is you who has got some questions to answer! How far have you gone with your resolutions? On a scale of 10, how will you rate yourself? You must pick a pen and paper and assess yourself. Maybe you should take a break right now, get into the mood of straight and deep reflection.

If you do a thorough and sincere assessment of yourself, preoccupied with moving well ahead, you will notice the missing link. The essence of seeing the missing link is to fix it.

Perhaps you need to be more disciplined, perhaps you need someone to keep a tap on you, perhaps you need to change the way you've been doing it to get a better result. Maybe you even need to talk to a psychologist, or any other professional of need. I just know there is something you can do to get to where you want to get to, to get all you want to get, to be all you want to be. Identify that thing and get it done. Just do it! Nike says.

You must end the year better than you started it! You must fix the missing link.

I look forward to hearing from you on how you melt the obstacles on your path, how you fixed the missing link.

There are so many people with unaccomplished goals, you can share with us things that people can do to achieve their goals.

SOME RESPITE FOR YOUR 'GOING THROUGHS'

What do you do when things don't turn out the way you planned?

What do you do when life seem to be putting so much on your plate? When it seems there is nothing to smile about and to add some salt to injury, it seems everyone around you is fine judging by their display pictures and social media posts.

To be honest my dear, you are not alone. Everyone in here has got some going through. Everyone has battles to win, some even wars, but we've found a way of smiling to the camera. Many thanks to the i-phones, the Samsungs, the infinix and Tecnos, oh I won't forget the i-tels and the other almost nameless droids and pads. Even if its for their 8 and above mega-pixels, they've done a fantastic job.

Some are writing life defining exams, some are looking for job, some are bittered they are not earning enough. Some are burdened by the unending list of bills. For some, thoughts of tomorrow is so scary, so scary that thought of next tomorrow is better left unmentioned.

As I speak to you, some can't place food on their table, yet they have, wives, children, siblings half brothers and sisters, full friends and three-quartered friends looking up to them.

How are you going to get through? What should you then do? Be strong my brother, be strong my sister. Keep trying and trying, keep the good fight and fight really strong. Do it for yourself, do it for us. Don't ever think no one cares about you, there is at least one person who loves you dearly, even if it's for that one person, please remain strong.

I may not know anything, but I know you will pull through. At the end, you will win! Keep doing your best, keep being your best. Again I say, you will win.

Leke Ademola-kay wrote this for you!
Why? Because you are special and well loved.

THE SWEET SAVOUR OF BEING SUAVE

Today, I recall the memory of my now resting in peace 6700s Nokia phone (**handkerchief please). Such an easy going, eye-catching classic slide phone. My eyes were filled with tears when my road side engineer (or isn't that what my phone repairer is?) told me that my stylish and compact size steel gadget is beyond repair. The thing is, it just wouldn't come up.

Who else wouldn't bemoan the death of a phone that took an entire saving to buy? Oh yeah, it takes life savings to buy phones and sim cards back in the days. As a matter of fact, I bought an mtn sim which my mother kept for me inside her wardrobe. The sim was inside a compact disc case, it was then wrapped in a brown envelope which was further wrapped with an old news paper before being wrapped in one of her finest lace materials before it was hidden in the corner of her wardrobe. I'm not kidding! Such was the dignity of sim cards and sophisticated cell phone whose sophistication can in no way be matched with gadgets of today.

What is there to remember about my five year long dead Nokia 6700s? Its the profile name I used on the phone; SUAVE (Nokia phones back then allow users to rechristened profile names). I can't recall how I got in contact with the word suave but I recall being so in love with the word that I made it my profile name. Suave implies behaving in a relaxed, confident, smooth and pleasant way. Ah, I love the part that means being superficially gracious, courteous and sophisticated. Shouldn't that be you? Being comported in all situations of life with shoulders high and classic boldness that says you are on top of the game. Truth is, if you won't be on top of the game, there is no point being a part of the game.

How do you become suave?
* Be relaxed: Excuse me, life will throw so many things at you but you have to know that the force that suspends the heavens is eternally potent. Heaven is not going to fall. So, in all situation, relax, take a deep breath and work your way out. My best saying is that "there is always a way out"

* Be confident: Yes, timidity is a monster! You must kill it before it kills you. Let the fragrance of confidence be loud all over you. Subject all your fears to the backstage of your mind and watch yourself gain that confidence that will give you an edge in all your endeavours.

* Be pleasant: No one wants to be around someone saucy, nasty, naughty, non-challant, unwelcoming. Be nice, kind, positively spirited, grateful even for little acts of kindness, make polite statements and smile all day.

*Be sophisticated : Being sophisticated is simply having and showing lot of experience and knowledge about anything and everything. Nothing holds you back, the world is yours.

The suave man or woman is a darling of everyone. He or she stretches his or her hands to get a thing and it is handed over on a platter of gold. The last rebuffing is the last you will ever get. It's time to be that suave man, that suave woman.

By the way, suave is pronounced \'swäv\ as in sway.

Enjoy the rest of the day!
Today's Tides of Transformation
Leke Ademola-kay.

THE AUDACITY TO LIVE

It is very unlikely that you will ply the Lagos-Ikorodu road without experiencing traffic gridlock. For us in ikorodu, "go-slow" is a lifestyle. So much that if the road is very free, you will be the one asking what could be wrong. It is the way you wonder what could be wrong when you experience three days of uninterrupted power supply.

Yes, if you have three days of power supply, you are likely to be the one praying for "NEPA" to take their light, you are sure that if they don't, you may not see that same light for the next one month! The bar of governance is so low these days that people wonder if the change is worth it.

So I was on this bus after several minutes of mental sorting. You have to sort buses before you board. You simply judge through your perception of the driver, the conductor and the already seated passengers to be sure your spirit aligns.

Ah, my brother, even the good book says "watch and pray. So in addition to the prayers you said before you left home, you add bus sorting. The news of kidnapping these days is alarming.

The bus I was in was giving the driver a tough time to control. In a minute we are on the right side of the road, on the left side in another minute. At a point, we almost hit one of those sand carrying tippers. Hmm indeed, if the Lord does not keep the house, the watchman watcheth in vain.

Chai, I have entered it today I told myself. In the midst of the chaos, I thought about the beautiful life ahead and my beautiful wife at home. Such a young man, may it not be said! Eheheheheheh, the skabashing began, "they won't get me" I told myself.

The driver refused to stop the bus despite how obvious it is that the bus is not in good condition. In the midst of the chaos was a woman screaming that she has beautiful clothes at home. I wondered if the issue at hand is about clothes. The yoruba man in me reminded me of the philosophical nature of her saying... She was simply saying she has reasons to live, children too young to be motherless I presume.

Everyone has got at least a reason to live. If there is one reason for you to live, there is at least one more reason. These reasons must give you some boldness, some audacity to withstand adversity.

Then you wonder, if everyone has got some reasons to live, how come some still thread the path of suicide, some still throw in the towel. The truth is that they believe they've reached the limit of their elasticity which is always a judgement made in error or made too soon.

People make errors in judgement by calling into the witness box:
1. What people are saying
2. What people will say.

So they ask themselves what will people say when they know that I am pregnant, I am in debt, I am HIV positive... What will people say when they hear that I broke up with my girlfriend. Interestingly, the supposed people are friends & families, colleagues at work, male and female folks to which they answer "brethren"....people on whose shoulder one should naturally lean.

Look, people will always say. And people are so fantastic judges when it's not their own case. Abi, the other day, a Nigerian who hasn't seen or heard from his president for almost 100days was on twitter mocking The President of another country who was sleeping at an event.

Life must be deliberately lived above what people will say. There are #lofty reasons why you must live, WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY IS NOT ONE .

You have reasons to live today, tomorrow and the next. Instead of being concerned about making a good impression, concentrate on living a great life. Remind yourself of the possibilities, the opportunities, the ideas for which you should live.

Invoke the audacity to live every moment. With such audacity you can face your adversity and then victory is just around the corner.

It's Today's Tides Of Transformation. You will win.

MAN AND HIS MANY ERRORS OF ATTRIBUTION
A true life story...

I took her frail looking soon on my shoulder, though looking malnourished, hunger could not take away the innocence and beautiful smile of a baby from him. He clung to me as a child will do to his father who just came back from yonder.

The mother at 17 has suffered so much rejection and dejection. Every where she turned, she was at the mercy of people's judgement and conclusions. Several theories and assumptions abound as to how she became pregnant at 16. Her schooling was stopped and her future lied so uncertain.

The parents, family members and friends judged her wayward and simply irresponsible. Typically African, no one was ready to tolerate the shame she has brought to the family by becoming pregnant at such tender age, unmarried of course!

Guess what, she was raped! Well, she went into the young man's house all by herself... So everybody who knew a bit of her story said and as far as they were concerned, that's enough to leave her to her cross. One would have thought, nothing else mattered, she was raped and the young man is no where insight till date.

Now, how many of the numerous panel of judges that work the street will she tell her story? Everyone simply went on to make conclusions on the kind of girl she must be to be carrying a baby at 17... People, you and I make so much errors in judgement, in attribution and in explaining other people's behaviors, situations and going throughs. Interestingly, we are almost always wrong because things are not always as they seem to be.

The other day, prophet Samuel was on an all expense paid trip to go and anoint a new king for Israel. Visa delivered, ticket bought, BTA provided, maybe with Uber cab waiting right at the air port all on God's bill. After all, he was running an errand for God. Arriving at his destination, the error that is an instinctual part of every man was almost going to make him anoint the wrong candidate. He judged by look and machismo... You definitely guessed right, he was very wrong!

There was yet another man who was born blind. One would think the men who had always being with Jesus Christ should know better, after all, they've being with the man who dwarfed the wisdom of Solomon. They assumed the role of panel of judges, in their opinion, the dude on dark goggle (typical of a Nigerian former head of state) must be suffering from an heavy load of sin.

And guess what, they were very wrong. The blind dude wasn't in that condition because of sin, he was simply fulfilling purpose. What purpose you ask? To glorify God!

For every news and story, there is an unreported version, aspect or chapter. It is wisdom to always examine everything carefully and hold on to that which is only good... That which is only true.

Think again before you make that judgement, stop explaining what you don't know, stop presenting matters whose facts are not at your disposal.

That is today's Tides of Transformation.
Make that change, make it now.
Feel free to share.

www.loftycentre.com

On this thread, I will publish a documentation of finely written articles that will stimulate and help you make necessary changes in your life.

Tides of transformation is a piece I publish every Thursday. please be free to share, reason and even criticise. For more detail, you may please visit www.loftycentre.com
or my personal fb page www.facebook.com/enuosetripua

It is very unlikely that you will ply the Lagos-Ikorodu road without experiencing traffic gridlock. For us in ikorodu, "go-slow" is a lifestyle. So much that if the road is very free, you will be the one asking what could be wrong. It is the way you wonder what could be wrong when you experience three days of uninterrupted power supply.

Yes, if you have three days of power supply, you are likely to be the one praying for "NEPA" to take their light, you are sure that if they don't, you may not see that same light for the next one month! The bar of governance is so low these days that people wonder if the change is worth it.

So I was on this bus after several minutes of mental sorting. You have to sort buses before you board. You simply judge through your perception of the driver, the conductor and the already seated passengers to be sure your spirit aligns.

Ah, my brother, even the good book says "watch and pray. So in addition to the prayers you said before you left home, you add bus sorting. The news of kidnapping these days is alarming.

The bus I was in was giving the driver a tough time to control. In a minute we are on the right side of the road, on the left side in another minute. At a point, we almost hit one of those sand carrying tippers. Hmm indeed, if the Lord does not keep the house, the watchman watcheth in vain.

Chai, I have entered it today I told myself. In the midst of the chaos, I thought about the beautiful life ahead and my beautiful wife at home. Such a young man, may it not be said! Eheheheheheh, the skabashing began, "they won't get me" I told myself.

The driver refused to stop the bus despite how obvious it is that the bus is not in good condition. In the midst of the chaos was a woman screaming that she has beautiful clothes at home. I wondered if the issue at hand is about clothes. The yoruba man in me reminded me of the philosophical nature of her saying... She was simply saying she has reasons to live, children too young to be motherless I presume.

Everyone has got at least a reason to live. If there is one reason for you to live, there is at least one more reason. These reasons must give you some boldness, some audacity to withstand adversity.

Then you wonder, if everyone has got some reasons to live, how come some still thread the path of suicide, some still throw in the towel. The truth is that they believe they've reached the limit of their elasticity which is always a judgement made in error or made too soon.

People make errors in judgement by calling into the witness box:
1. What people are saying
2. What people will say.

So they ask themselves what will people say when they know that I am pregnant, I am in debt, I am HIV positive... What will people say when they hear that I broke up with my girlfriend. Interestingly, the supposed people are friends & families, colleagues at work, male and female folks to which they answer "brethren"....people on whose shoulder one should naturally lean.

Look, people will always say. And people are so fantastic judges when it's not their own case. Abi, the other day, a Nigerian who hasn't seen or heard from his president for almost 100days was on twitter mocking The President of another country who was sleeping at an event.

Life must be deliberately lived above what people will say. There are #lofty reasons why you must live, WHAT WILL PEOPLE SAY IS NOT ONE .

You have reasons to live today, tomorrow and the next. Instead of being concerned about making a good impression, concentrate on living a great life. Remind yourself of the possibilities, the opportunities, the ideas for which you should live.

Invoke the audacity to live every moment. With such audacity you can face your adversity and then victory is just around the corner.

Dear Parents/Guardians,
Again, the school year is over or coming to an end soon (depending on your location and existing academic calendar in your state or province). No doubt, you’ve been wonderful over the year. I understand how you ensured that your ward’s tuition is paid, the morning school-runs, and how involved you are in your ward’s academic activities. Hence, I celebrate you for being so resourceful.

However, I also know that “nothing goes for nothing”. The motivation behind your resourcefulness must have been to ensure the academic success of your wards. And usually, this defines the expectation of parents and guardians in relation to the academic performance of their children/wards. So, varying emotions manifest in times like this. The School’s reports on the academic performance of students are out or will be out soon. Grades will be assigned. Being the last term of the school session, students will be labeled and categorized as PASSED or FAILED, PROMOTED or TO REPEAT. This is the reason for this open letter. Please read through; I will try to be brief.

I am calling your attention to a sensitive and recurrent global issue in times like this.
Over the years, it has been observed that our students (especially those with low academic performance as revealed by their assessment report cards) are being perpetually subjected to psychological distresses, devaluing addresses, demeaning acts, physical maltreatments and undue tortures; to mention a few.

May I tell you this: “It is demeaning enough for the school to have carelessly labeled your child with the “FAIL” term; parents do not have to add to the menace with irrational responses”
What do you see to these? A parent denied his son dinner because he failed Mathematics. Having to rescue a child from being battered to death by his own biological father because he/she had been asked to repeat a class. Parents addressing their children with provocative and insulting words due to poor academic performance. Parents comparing the academic performance of their own child with that of a neighbor; just to inform their child how weak he/she is. These and more are recurring incidents.
Quite despicable is the fact that these approaches are the supposed correctional measures adopted by some parents to check the seeming academic woe of their children.

As revealed from my interaction with parents and guardians in the past, it appears that, “Parents tend to react to grades on report cards than they respond to their children’s underlying needs”. It takes more than being just a parent to understand that the totality of the child is more than the figures and grades on the report sheet.

If you truly want that child to excel academically, why not concentrate on the child's disposition? You may be concerned about the failure statement in his/her report, yet, don’t let that prod you to engage in abusive conducts which are often detrimental to the emotions, personality development, social relations and psychological well-being of the child.

Have you thought about sitting him/her down for a reflection on his result? Ask him if he has any reason for the poor performance. Ask her if she thinks she can do better than that. Try to know if he/she is happy with learning. Ask how you can be of help to him. Ask him about his teachers and the school environment. Ask questions about his peer group. Evaluate the home environment and conditions, does it support learning? Help her develop achievable learning goals for the days ahead. Rather than outright rejection, make him feel that he is not alone; when he fails, you fail. I’m sure an average child won’t like to let his/her parents down.

I am not asking you to hide your disappointment from him, let him know you are concerned about his performance. However, the right message must be conveyed. I believe these will help.
Listen to details and not just react to figures and grades on a sheet of paper. As much as I do not want play down the informative and placement value of the results turned out from schools, I will also like to bring to your knowledge that these results do not tell accurately everything about your child. It may even surprise you that the low scores in your child’s report card could be an outcome of his/her teacher’s lapses and or poor learning environment. It may even be an outcome of poorly tailored school activities/schedules. For instance, I have seen schools where five to seven subjects are written during class assessment test and examination periods (in a day). This is a topic for another day.

You should also be aware that high scores in exams do not necessarily mean mastery of subject contents. So, don’t turn out to be that envious parent who compares his child with others; fingers are not equal. Mind you, I am not playing down the place of model-referencing for the purpose of motivation in learning.
Highly esteemed parents and guardians, you don’t really have to nail that child/ward. Help him get out of his mess. Seek to help her discover the gaps in her learning. When it's about children, it's about lives not files.

Sincerely yours.
Omolayo M. Ademimiko, Chief Consultant at Edupsyche Konsults wrote this piece from Benin city, Nigeria.

http://www.loftycentre.com/scores-grades-an-open-letter-to-nigerian-parents-and-guardians/

Today, I recall the memory of my now resting in peace 6700s Nokia phone (**handkerchief please). Such an easy going, eye-catching classic slide phone. My eyes were filled with tears when my road side engineer (or isn't that what my phone repairer is?) told me that my stylish and compact size steel gadget is beyond repair. The thing is, it just wouldn't come up.

Who else wouldn't bemoan the death of a phone that took an entire saving to buy? Oh yeah, it takes life savings to buy phones and sim cards back in the days. As a matter of fact, I bought an mtn sim which my mother kept for me inside her wardrobe. The sim was inside a compact disc case, it was then wrapped in a brown envelope which was further wrapped with an old news paper before being wrapped in one of her finest lace materials before it was hidden in the corner of her wardrobe. I'm not kidding! Such was the dignity of sim cards and sophisticated cell phone whose sophistication can in no way be matched with gadgets of today.

What is there to remember about my five year long dead Nokia 6700s? Its the profile name I used on the phone; SUAVE (Nokia phones back then allow users to rechristen profile names). I can't recall how I got in contact with the word suave but I recall being so in love with the word that I made it my profile name. Suave implies behaving in a relaxed, confident, smooth and pleasant way. Ah, I love the part that means being superficially gracious, courteous and sophisticated. Shouldn't that be you? Being comported in all situations of life with shoulders high and classic boldness that says you are on top of the game. Truth is, if you won't be on top of the game, there is no point being a part of the game.

HOW DO YOU BECOME SUAVE?
* BE RELAXED: Excuse me, life will throw so many things at you but you have to know that the force that suspends the heavens is eternally potent. Heaven is not going to fall. So, in all situation, relax, take a deep breath and work your way out. My best saying is that "there is always a way out"

* BE CONFIDENT: Yes, timidity is a monster! You must kill it before it kills you. Let the fragrance of confidence be loud all over you. Subject all your fears to the backstage of your mind and watch yourself gain that confidence that will give you an edge in all your endeavours.

* BE PLEASANT: No one wants to be around someone saucy, nasty, naughty, non-challant, unwelcoming. Be nice, kind, positively spirited, grateful even for little acts of kindness, make polite statements and smile all day.

*BE SOPHISTICATED : Being sophisticated is simply having and showing lot of experience and knowledge about anything and everything. Nothing holds you back, the world is yours.

The suave man or woman is a darling of everyone. He or she stretches his or her hands to get a thing and it is handed over on a platter of gold. The last rebuffing is the last you will ever get. It's time to be that suave man, that suave woman.

By the way, suave is pronounced \'swäv\ as in sway.
Enjoy the rest of the day!
http://www.loftycentre.com/the-sweet-savor-of-being-suave/

HAVE you wondered why changing seem difficult? Have you thought about how to simplify the process of changing an old way of life to a new and more profitable way? You are not alone. Everyone have a part that want to stay in the comfort zone of the old order. Of course, there is no point changing a winning formula but if an old order is no longer profitable, then it must be changed.

There is a particular country in Africa whose people cannot imbibe the simple order of joining the queue and wait for their turn or simply make use of a pedestrian bridge, why? Because they are so used to the old ways and find those ways most convenient. Yet, the country is governed by a group of people who rode to power on the mantra of change.

Change should not just be by chants or by mere sloganeering. Change must come with deliberate attempt on the modification of behaviour. That is, if true and sincere change is what you seek, you must rise up to it and take responsibility. The call to becoming a better person cannot be complete without an individual making crucial amendments to his or her way of life.

For instance, someone on a mission to lose some weight must be ready to work on what and when he or she eats and such individual must be ready to do some physical exercise no matter how difficult (and it will be difficult at the beginning). The easy path is choosing to do nothing and guess what? It's the most threaded path. Again, Warren Buffet's saying comes to mind, "price is what you pay, value is what you get".

In today's tides of transformation, we shall discuss the recipe for change; the procedural formula for achieving change.

David Gleicher in the 60s was the first to propound the formula for change. This formula was further worked upon by Kathie Dannemiller. The formula states that change will be achieved only when:
1. There is dissatisfaction with how things are
2. There is vision of what is possible
3. Steps to be taken towards the vision are clearly stated.
4. A product of the three above must be greater than any resistance in sight.

So when these three factors are in place and well fortified, change is imminent. However, if any of the three factors is missing, then the chants of change will end in chagrin; frustration and dissapointment.

Yes, it is good to say I want to change but we must go ahead to move the potency in our lips to our limbs and change what needs to be changed.

Let's get back to that African country whose chants of change was everywhere during the build up to their general election and take a keen look using the lens of our discussed formula !
1. Was there an expression of dissatisfaction with status quo? Yes!
2. Was there a communication of vision for what is possible? Yes, with the multitude of promises.
3. Were steps to be taken towards the vision clearly stated? Well, from clear indications, one cannot be too positive on that!
4. Are there resistances? Oh, obviously more than envisaged! And because one of the three factors are missing, the force of resistance has being quite weighty.

Was there a change? Yes, in leadership but not in attitude, behavior and general ways of doing things. What lesson is there for you? As a person going somewhere, you can't afford to just go about with the chants of change. Changing the old for the new is serious business. You must clearly state the steps you need to take and take them. You must be open to change and be positive about change - positive change of course.

With the necessary factors in place, you will make the tides of transformation to turn to your advantag.
www.loftycentre.com

Chai, this Ben Bruce own... When there is life, there is hope.

ifenes:
Our minds are constantly creating whether we are aware or not. A mind that constantly feeds on fear will constantly mirror the world of fear and anxiety. " in the beginning God created the heaven and earth" would be better understood as " the mind created the heaven,Earth and unlimited realities".

The only way to trap a human or life form is to first disempower it's/his/her minds. The mind is the source of life and creativity.

As he thinketh in his heart, so is he!

In this interesting rhetorics, we talk about the Wonders Of Creation & patents for duplication.

The skies stand unendingly in absolute deviance to the force of gravity. The skies remain continually suspended in the grandiose of some magnificence.

The spreading of the seas and the running of the rivers carries in itself some beauty that commands exclamation.

The smile on the face of a new born baby triggers some scintillating effect on the tummy and on the heart of every sensitive being like the striking of a sonorous cord on the Strings of a guitar.

The step by step delicate sojourn completed by the baby defiles simple explanation. From the first prize winning spermatozoa fusing with a “not just lucky egg cell” that leads to the formation of a zygote, to the implantation of the zygote in the uterus for an almost 300 days of developmental processes.

The completion of this process & eventual birth of the baby is best appreciated by a happy father who holds the new born in the tingling of his arm and say “behold my progeny, the proof of my manhood”. The mother, in the radiating beam of a weak eye clutches the baby to her breast and say “lo, the token of my motherhood”

These and many more describes the wonder and beauty of creation. There must be a super intelligent being behind these tales of creation, one cannot but ponder. Hypotheses and theories abound with logical and illogical explanations, approved and disproved evidences, admitted and dismissed arguements but the one who has offered the most detailed explanation for creation is the one called almighty God.

This God has given just one phrase of answer to all the agitations, questions, and theories. He simply said “I am that I am”. He posits that He is just God and is not interested in arguements for or against His being God or that He created the heavens and the earth. He simply need no help been fought for eventhough men in their folly insist on arguing and fighting for Him, a waste of energy.

And then the beauty of a flying aeroplane, the joy of a moving vehicle, the excitement of a clean clear image producing television, the brilliance of a camera producing still or video images and many more great inventions made by the hands of men.
A deep mental search into the order of creation shows that every single human invention is fashioned after natural inventions, like aeroplane like birds, like cars like four legged animals, like television like dreams, like cameras, like the eye, the list goes on. It shows that the human mind must have been issued a patent and authorization for duplication of creation.

The good news is that every single soul carries this patent to duplicate God made inventions without limits and turn the world around. Every human being has being appointed as a co-creator with God and the token of that patent is the mind so much that whatsoever can be conceived on that mind can be achieved. Your mind has an unlimited capacity to churn out fantastic ideas, products, services and inventions when engaged to deliver.

The mind was freely empowered as the seat of creativity, it is only left for the user to engage it and turn the world and lives around.

To that man and woman who will engage the unlimited power of the mind as a seat of solution and creativity, I say what a blessed man, what a blessed woman and what a blessed world.

source: http://www.loftycentre.com/?p=509

so apt. Some people will rather keep nagging about how people don't respect them. This is the way to go

There were chants of excitement, of satisfaction and stirring of emotion when Barack Obama, out going president of the United States of America gave his farewell speech in Chicago on January 10th, 2017. We bring you 12 life transforming statements from the speech.

1. Change only happens when ordinary people get involved, get engaged, and come together to demand it.

2. We are all created equal, endowed by our Creator with certain unalienable rights, among them life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

3. It’s up to all of us to make sure our government can help us meet the many challenges we still face.

4. If we don’t create opportunity for all people, the disaffection and division that has stalled our progress will only sharpen in years to come.

5. You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view… until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.

6. Without some common baseline of facts; without a willingness to admit new information, and concede that your opponent is making a fair point, and that science and reason matter, we’ll keep talking past each other, making common ground and compromise impossible.

7. Reality has a way of catching up with you.

8. To simply deny the problem not only betrays future generations; it betrays the essential spirit of innovation and practical problem-solving that guided our Founders.

9. Our Constitution is a remarkable, beautiful gift. But it’s really just a piece of parchment. It has no power on its own. We, the people, give it power – with our participation, and the choices we make.

10. If something needs fixing, lace up your shoes and do some organizing. If you’re disappointed by your elected officials, grab a clipboard, get some signatures, and run for office yourself.

11. Presuming a reservoir of goodness in others can be a risk, and there will be times when the process disappoints you.

12. I am asking you to believe. Not in my ability to bring about change – but in yours.

Note: One of the great characters in American fiction, Atticus Finch was referenced for “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view… until you climb into his skin and walk around in it"

source: http://www.loftycentre.com/?p=472