Thegracefulness:
Well, usually I just read and continue hiding in the shadows, but from your write-up, I can deduce you’re a child. At most, a prepubescent or teenager, because they’re the ones invested and infested with these issues you’ve mentioned. I’ve decided to advise you, like I would, my younger ones.

Ignore the persons advising you to go physical and beat up this your supposed bully. Let me tell you, a fight can lead to a thousand and one other things, not limited to a murder charge.

I’ve seen where somebody got incarcerated—a fifteen years old girl, because in school, she hit another girl in the chest, not knowing this other girl had previously been suffering from a cardiovascular problem. Then she slumped and died.

From an argument about dirty underwear, straight to jail.

From your write-up, I could also deduce you probably school outside this home country, Nigeria. What with calling your institution ‘college’ and the cafeteria settings and all that in your description.

It’s a good thing you’re not in a Nigerian school, else if you reported this matter to a person of authority in the school, best believe, they’d mock you, call you a coward and shove it down your throat. Maybe even do so in the presence of your classmates (which would totally worsen things).

But good enough, you seem to be in a more organized academic environment, where they recognize that bullying is a real act and a threat to the lives of victims.

Go to a person of authority. As quick as you can. Make sure you do not belittle the psychological effect your bully is inflicting on you. Be persistent and courageous in your report, so that at least, she would either be suspended, taken to detention, or have her guardians invited to take note of what their ward is doing in school.

Whoever said you’re a coward for ignoring her, is simply dumb and a coward themselves. As a man, I inform my “children” never to raise their hands on a woman. No matter the situation. At worst walk away, or at best reprimand her seriously. Occasion the reprimand in a way that there would be others around to bear you witness.

Do not avoid your bully. Except confronting them would cause you any physical harm. There is no shame in walking away. Don’t be the first to engage in a fight. Always, and always be the defense—especially in a fight. I sincerely hope this never results in a fight, but if it does, walk away, and if she is not letting you walk away, if that be your last resort at least, slap her once. Hard and resounding. So that it never escapes her mind, and if she’s seeking revenge, whenever she touches the part of the slap, she’d begin to doubt if revenge would be possible.

Somebody else also mentioned the possibility that she may like you or have a crush on you. Except this person is her twin brother or sister, I wonder how they know this for a fact. I am much convinced that anybody who likes somebody and acts in this manner she’s acting, is more than anything a lunatic. And should be avoided thoroughly.

I beg you, do not encourage whatever nonsense she’s scheming for you. Avoid her. Do not sit close to her. Do not ever lock eye contacts with her. Because then, if her intentions are otherwise, now she would just have easier and more profound reasons to double her torment because she would consider you a fool.

I sincerely hope you reach out to somebody close to you—say your older siblings, or maybe your parents before this becomes something else. They know you better. And I believe they’re in a better position to offer you qualified and quantitative advice. Good luck, child.

Thanks. Most of what you say is correct. Appreciate it

Qatar2022:

I hate this nonsense i read, if you're my son i will disown you , what a soft stupid idiot you're

Ok. Thank you

HenryDion:
I happen to know the solution to your problem. Check back a minute later for the modified version.

Modified:

One thing is true, your bully is attracted to you, and not reciprocating the attention hurts her even more.

Since she's hurt by your avoidance, she would want you to feel hurt too, so you know how that feels. That's human psychology 101.

If you don't want her to pick on you anymore, there are lots of options.

Instead of sitting far away from her in class, sit very close to her, at the same desk if possible. Even if she wants to pick on you, she wouldn't dare when you're in such proximity.

Instead of avoiding her stares, look into them, boldly and never look down. That's submission. Ask her to give you her note, even though you don't need it.

From your write up, I could deduce you struggle with self-esteem. A quick fix for that is hitting the school gym, or enrolling in a boxing class.

The aim is not to fight, but to build your confidence and feel good about yourself. When I step out of the gym, I feel like a million dollar cake.

When you're confident it glows, everyone sees it, even you see it.

I've looked at this way actually, except I can't seem to detect any signs of attraction whatsoever. But thanks anyway. I understand your perspective. Thanks a lot

HarunaWest:
why cant you ignore people? Why are you so obsessed with peoples opinion about you? Arent you good looking or do you have a defect that gives you low self esteem?

I try my best to ignore but she always singles me out. You have to admit there are limits to which people can be ignored

heniford2:
dude yo u need to beat that girl up to teach her not to dare try yo again and yo need to level up in ur school okey bullying stops by profound action strong ones okey get her ass wrecked weeped up okey be smart in doing so, never let anybody bull u never.

Honestly I wish I could, but I know it wouldn't look good on me at all. If I wanted to, I could really malhandle her. But I know the extent of my temper when I get upset and level of injury I can inflict especially on a woman as small as she is. Shouting back at her is a dead end because she's like a parrot on weed. She's very loud and has that IDGAF vibe. The only way to really deal with her is physically but I don't really know her. I wish she wasn't in my class

Since I got into college, there's this young lady in my class who's sort of like the class clown. She's loud, intrusive, and constantly makes insulting jokes or biting sarcastic remarks about people which is intended to be "banter" for some reason. And lately, it seems I've become her main target. Now im a naturally a quiet guy who mostly keeps to himself. I'm not quick witted or jokey. And her hyper attitude is a major put off. For my first two college years, I've taken good care not to get on her bad side, so as not to become the butt of her jokes. So this basically started in my 3rd year. Since I hardly ever speak in class, when I do speak, she starts heckling me, or make jokes out of anything I say. She does this EVERY SINGLE TIME. At first I shrugged it off but it seems the more I ignore her, she tries even harder. I've watched her get into a verbal fight with another girl before and she absolutely broke her down to the point of tears. I know getting into a battle of words with her will only aggravate things and make me lose my temper and act irrationally in public. She's much smaller than I am, probably the smallest in my class, but I don't dare attack her because she's a girl. She's a nuisance to me at this point and I don't know her to deal with her. I confess I've had to intentionally miss some classes because I don't want to encounter her. She's basically made me her new target and I don't know who to talk to about this because nearly everyone in this school thinks bullying doesn't exist. Plus there's this idea that if you tell on others bullying you instead of handling it by yourself, then you're soft. Especially if you're a guy being targeted by a girl. I'm totally miserable at this point. Last night was the last straw. I got a call from a private number and when I picked the call, it was supposedly one of my closest female friends who's in another department in my college. I wasn't surprised it was a strange line because she had told me sometime ago that her phone got stolen. She asked to meet in the school cafeteria and I obliged. I came out that night and sat in a corner of the cafeteria with my phone in my hand, using it. After close to 30 minutes I didn't see her, I phoned the line she used to call me and it didn't go through. An hour passed and this lady bully from my class entered the cafeteria with a bunch of her friends, both guys and girls. They sat about two tables away from me. I refused to make eye contact and remained fixated on my phone still trying to contact the girl who called me. After some minutes, I started hearing giggling and snickering from the table of the bully. I didn't want to look up but, it started becoming distracting. After I while, I decided to glance towards their table and I met them staring right at me, grinning and giggling and pointing. My heart sank into my stomach and I felt so ashamed. It felt like I was in middle school. They didn't even care that I saw them,they kept making fun of me from a distance, albeit in hush, but still somewhat audible tones. After some time I got up and decided to leave the cafeteria. I refused to look at their table. One of the guys there kept calling my name, then the bully girl said something, I didn't hear it clearly, but whatever she said suddenly had all of them bursting out laughing uncontrollably. I felt like a little boy being picked on. It was so embarrassing that I cried silently in my room last night. I started making up theories in my head - questioning if perhaps the call I get was a prank from these people. I didn't know what to feel. This girl is just a thorn in my side and she's so unreasonable. Constantly in Joker mode, it's difficult to have a serious conversation with her. The experience last night, coupled with many other bullying experiences I've had in the past has honestly made me to consider suicide. I'm not proud of such thoughts, but it's how I've felt ever since last night. I've always had this feeling that no one likes or understands me. I try to be social but it sometimes feels like I force myself on people. People don't seem too eager to engage with me. In my life I've had probably just 4-5 really close friends and that's it. I don't mind being an introvert, it's just that when I do crave to be social, it doesn't work out the way I want. I'm feeling really low now and just wanted to get some advice, both on this woman and life in general.