If he can ask you to split 800naira and pay half for Apple he bought, it means you don't even get to enjoy weekend outings or some small chops treats from him.
It is well

bizme:
Summary: Society expects a man to be a provider, and the woman to be in need of being provided for. Very interesting explanation from you, even though this doesn't exactly fit into the feminism-driven society that some are hustling to perpetuate.

That is what society expects but we are grateful to the earlier feminists who fought for the right of a woman to become financial providers as well, it is this financial freedom that protects the widow from men who sees them as vulnerable and can be taken advantage of.

Do not confuse feminism for something else.

If you are sure there is any form of maltreatment truly, Go to child welfare office in your state and report him there, they will invite the two of you with representative from your families, they will help you reach an agreement on whatever he will be dropping monthly for the kids while they in your custody.

It is however important for you to have something worth doing for yourself, you can't depend on your baby papa for long, it is not every man that is responsible therefore you have to take responsibility for yourself.

obstead200:
aunty carry ur ignorance vomit for here. CONRAISS stands for consolidated research and allied institutions salary scale. They are paid almost like lecturers of higher institutions. CONRAISS 1 is equivalent of grade 7 in core civil service

You are obnoxiously ignorant, I won't engage you, go and get the Nigerian Scheme of service.

LordofNaija:

CONRAISS 3 is the equivalent of level 10
CONRAISS1 - LEVEL8
2- level 9
3- level 10

What sort of misinformation is this?
A University graduate in any federal parastatal today will either be employed with Conraiss 7 which is same as level 8 depending on the salary scale of the place.

Level 3 is for school cert holders.

Widowers are not neglected by society, the way society show care for both party is only different.

The woman's duty is traditionally tied to taking care of the house and tending to her husband and kids hence, once she becomes a widow, no one would bother about how she does her domestic chores, all what everyone would be concerned about is how she copes financially.

A man on the other hand is traditionally tied to being a financial provider hence when he loses his wife, the society render help to him by advising him to get another wife immediately to take care of him, the kids and the home. Some families even go to the extent of searching for suitable women for him and even if he is yet to get another wife, women around him would still find a way to help him out with domestic chores.

I hope Sir Shina Peters fulfil his promise to the boy, he has messed up in the past but it's not too late .

I feel weak.
Poverty is never an excuse, how can you allow a man as old as this befriend your child to the point of letting him sleep over at your house, how much does he even have to give you?
The girl shouldn't even have a boyfriend in the first place, she is too young.

Kelvin30286063:

Paint her bad. How did I do that?
I love dogs and we've had 2 burglary issues in 1 year. Having dogs around help solve that problem. My dogs are not a problem to my wife. I have people that comes in to clean the house and take care of them and I don't think there is a number of dogs you should have as long as you can take care of them.
If this post looks like I'm painting her bad to you then you must be a very difficult person to deal with.

Whatever you think about me is inconsequential.
Wait until immature boys rubbish your wife's effort at being frugal and concort stories like she is controlling you and help you dissect your home.

My mom's business name is OMOTOLA and it is registered, so what will happen to the business name?

It depends on who is financing the wedding.

Kelvin30286063:

Well I don't have a side chick but you point is not valid cuz most times she doesn't agree with what I spend money on. Take for instance, I need to take 2 of our 3 dogs for vaccination today, that will cost me about 15k. My wife can't know about that cuz it's unreasonable to her that I'll use 15k to vaccinate dogs.

Keeping such numbers of dogs and spending so much on them should mean that they are bringing in more money for you that is, you use them for business, anything outside that is quite wasteful, what will you be doing with plenty dogs?

As for the money, open a new account with a different bank, ask her to transfer the money into the account or you pick her phone and do the transfer yourself, she won't object because it is your money, don't try to paint her bad.

In all these, I blame the man, he turned his wife to a footmat for his mistress to step on.

The mistress has no shame, the man may have lied to her that he solely own the property but since the wife has presented a valid document, the mistress is meant to sit it out.

Now let's assume the man even own the property solely, the ex-wife that bore kids for him still have more right than the mistress who is in no legal way connected to the man.

I'm so ashamed on her behalf.

Look at me here wishing my inlaws will always enter kitchen to cook while I eat from it and save myself from stress. As long as there's enough food in the house, you can even cook for your community, life is not that hard.

What I can only deduce from this op is that there has been series of fights and it didn't just start today.

Meanwhile, the wife is wrong for throwing you out of the house, even if she is the one paying the house rent, she should at least have some respect for her husband.

Nairaland is a reflection of what Nigeria is about today.
There are too many frustrated, broke and unhappy people roaming around.

Those that don't have anything to offer yet they will try all they can to bring others down to their level.

May God save us from poverty.

Saintmary:


No matter how much leeway a husband allows a woman, she will still make sacrifices.
You just have to decide what is worth it.

Everyone makes one sacrifice or the other in marriage, man or woman.

Amaka
I was 33 when I got married and honestly, I do not think marriage benefits women in the long run. Whatever people consider a benefit, does not equal all the things marriage makes you lose. I think marriage hindered me from doing certain things because there is a huge constraint on your time and energy. You are meant to be building the family, but then things you are building does not necessarily benefit you. A men can be working to build his family, while building his career at the same time. He gains both the benefits of being married to you such as free labour, but women can’t say the same thing. The nine years I spent building my family, I could have built my career. The only solution was to not be married anymore so I did that, and my life has been happier and healthier.

This lady raised a valid point but there are exceptions.
A woman can grow her family and grow her career at the same time, all she needs is a supportive husband who genuinely wishes her well, she needs to know how to manage her time in other to balance her home and career, it's not easy but it is achievable.

bukatyne:


You need to always ask 'WHY' when someone is offering something out of the norm.

There is no free lunch in freetown.

Believing there is free lunch somewhere or over valuing yourself is why people fall for scams in relationships, business, education, finances etc.

What's out of norm in someone seeking a single mother for marriage?

Werey man, how a married man would still expect loyalty from his girlfriend is beyond me, so you want to delay her destiny when you know you won't marry her.

In all though, it's your poor wife I pity, being emotionally involved with someone else is the height of it and I hope she realises this earlier and know what to do with herself and her kids before you ruin her.

There is no way the spread of HIV or STDs can stop anytime soon cos I don't understand how three grown ups would have sex without condoms in such reckless manner.

As for Lautech, the denial is expected.

I can imagine if it was the DIL that called her MIL "useless", this thread would be on the 20th page already.

There's every possibility that the man is married but wants to eat his cake and have it.
I hope the lady use her head well, May God save us from time wasters.

Congrats to him and his family, eat your own billions and leave when it's time.

It's unfortunate that the woman acted that way, some women have no conscience.

Every pregnancy differs, sickness, cravings, weakness or anything comes at different periods for different women.

While some women are usually agile and can do chores conveniently, some may be advised to be on bedrest, some can crave for the weirdest things ever, some don't even crave for anything at all, it all boils down to the individual.

It is not every woman that is dramatic or manipulative, everything does not revolve around men.
When you are pregnant, your survival and that of your baby comes first even before you think of any man.

I always find it funny when some boys feel they know women better than women.
You've never been pregnant and you can never be pregnant, why run around the topic like you know it all.

Congrats to DCP now CP Rabi Umar

I believe you can decline especially if you are not comfortable with the student or any doctor at all.
I have declined to be checked for dilation severally, I honestly cannot allow one person to deep hand into my vagina to check not to talk of a group of students.
If it's time for the baby to come out, she sure will.

If you wish to do your own prewedding picture, your wife can lay on the floor while you tramp on her, heck she can even massage your feet while you sit on the throne, in the end it is whatever works for you, allow others do whatever works for them.

Good to know, the state of most government hospitals in Nigeria is nothing to write home about.

Regina has never been a good actress, to break back into Nollywood she needs to go extra length.
Omoli Oboli, Shaffy Bello, Ireti Doyle will all dust her.

We know the same person is behind the two stories but continue if that makes you happy.