₦airaland Forum

My friend you've been brainwashed or you're a clown. My grandmother was learned and my mother also, I have met a lot of learned and ambitious grannies like justice mrs pemu and I'm still meeting many yet these people are in their husbands house cooking dishes and enjoying it... Why am I even still here sef...

A word is enough for the wise.

TDN: you are right, although you were kinda harsh. women need to learn how to be independent financially. as long as men hold the purse strings, there will always be undue influence. its not easy as we were taught not to be ambitious. home making was the ultimate goal. times are changing though cos even when the society needs and wants us to be home builders, it doesnt want us to be ambitious, but needs us to.

You're a great help to your parents. But please stop twisting cowardise to mean guts... Stop it. So when your man is arround peers and can not express himself you would fight for him right? That dude you call husband is a figure head, you're actually the man in the house and it was women like you who encouraged his weekness... I don't have to write a note. Already made my point.

Have it in mind that as you are trying to evolve we are also evolving with the it... The rest of the men who refused to evolve will be thrown overboard to you as the reminants. You can do whatever you like with them. Those are the ones you killed during the war but we always win and we will continue to be your master till thine kingdom come cuz we are stronger physically and emotionally... So, hope you got yourself a gun cuz when I see you I'ma take what I want. LOL

TDN: WIMP? he is considered that cos he is cool headed?
COWARD? cos he decided to marry an aggressive lady. actually it takes a lot of guts to be with someone like me.
MUGU?cos he doesnt need to oppress me to validate his masculinity?

where is Bully coming from? strong words but i completely understand. any man that chooses to be with someone like me is a threat to a guy like you. the society made up of people like you. well im sorry to dissapoint you. im engaged to a great guy. he likes cooking. i can cook too. i always complain he is making me fat, so i insist on making meals, cos mine are healthier. he is very cool headed and is the best guy for me but im gonna say this, a wimp or coward he is not. so he treats me like an equal, you have no idea how much strength that takes.

there will always be those like you who will call him names but he is the strongest man i know cos no matter how aggressive i get, he just ignores me and i feel ashamed and calm down. i have never heard him raise his voice, not even once, but there is unimaginable power in silence. i jnow im a better person with him in my life and most importantly, i know thats the man i want to father my children.

yes, it only matters what he thinks about himself and what i think of him. i guess you are married or will be married to the society, since what they think is all you care about. its not by force, by all means, be with the type of woman you want. its your choice but dont bash men who end up with women like me cos you have no idea what they are enjoying. never judge a book by its cover cos with my aggression and views of the world, there are so many things he finds wonderful about me.

the strength of a woman is immeasurable and it baffles me when some men measure their strength by how the world perceives how they treat their women.

Guys who are very busy with something else would walk away but however some guys have your time and they would deal with it perfectly... Don't get cocky...

TDN: guys stop walking away. take it as a challenge. like taming the shrew.

You just dey mix 1+1+xyz together. You want to scarter your head. You talking of equality and leadership in one sentence. How can you be equal to your leader? Leader and Master can be interchanged so your leader is also your master. And your master is a man. Bunch of hypicrites. Lol

koyes: You are using the word wrongly. A domineering person is the same as an authoritarian who never listens to his surbodinates because he feels he has the sole power and should suggest and make decisions even without the consent of his followers. This is not the quality of a good leader. A good leader knows that he does not have the sole power and that his followers have the right to make suggestions for the benefit of the group before the leader makes a decision. Can an authoritative or domineering person be a good leader?NO! So how can a domineering man be better?

The man you marry would be seen to be a whimp by the society and a victim of bully... He is incapable of thinking or act like a man. He's a coward and that's what has attracted him to you because he is the mugu you will be comfortable with as your subject...

That's how we men see him. But I guess its how you see him that matters most. Right?

TDN: ok o. what about aggressive men? i take it you walk away too. i dont know if its low self esteem or the fact that people are just people. if thats the case, fine. by the way im a feminist and extremely aggressive and im certain the man i will marry has to be cool headed not because i want to try and take advantage of him but i know he will teach me humility. everyone is capable of being both aggressive and cool headed. it takes the right partner to inspire and bring out the good traits in you. it takes a special kind of man to be with an aggressive woman and be happy with her. my mum used to say, we all cannot be sugar or else the world will lick us up.

Don't mind that amatuer jare. Lol

njokusboy: Lolzz, you think michelle obama got to where she is by always opposing obama? My friend wake up...don't lemme tell you stephanies story, u don't wanna go through such plus she is a celebrity while u re nobody.... You go grow old...
I hope u find the puppet of your dream so you can dictate to him, if u don't, u can always divorce, u re afterall comfortable with that...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Belly dey pain mem brodaly see as this woman work on you. Talk truth, won't you have beaten this kind of a woman to prove it in a different way? I watched a movie a lady was being flogged and stoned to death while some warriors was passing by and they came down from their hourses killed all the men and instead of the lady to thank them and started fighting them. One angry man slit her throat open. Ther ring leader said why did you have to do that, it hasn't gotten to that and he replied, "she's a bitch" and walked away angrily. Its the same story for feminists...

njokusboy: Scared of what... I aint scared of jacksh1t, aggressive women don't bother me, I don't even care about them, I pretend they don't exist but they also know better than to bring their "hot head" close to me...
That a lady doesn't spit fire and turn the house upside down doesn't mean she has no self worth... Only people who have low self esteem think they always have a point to prove...

Doesn't change anything. A girl like sarafigirl got her own matching stud out there and when she finds him she'd be attracted to him... This makes feminism useless cuz no matter the category of woman there is always a counter man... And she will be humble to him.

Woman is still woman and man is man. One leads and the other follows.

y-fo:
arrrgh!, I missed the party and I so love this kinda thread

Anyways, seems people like to generalise and that causes a lot of confusion.
Ladies have different personalities they are born with and if you want all of them to have a high degree of humility -then you're on a long thing- cuz ladies like safari have a "natural fire" in their belly and trying to change her into a model meek girl is equivilent to changing her very essense which is almost impossible and definately not the right thing to do.

You might say our "fore-mothers" used to be generally meek and that would be some-what correct though I do not have empirical proof, but that was as a result of social training from when they were young and thus they could better change their "default settings/personalities"...this is next to impossible in our current day and age and so is not a viable option.

Also, there are extremists in any ideology so people should quit using the bad eggs to cast a shadow upon the whole group...the fact that we have nigerian males that wanna "lord" it over the females and generally view females as an inferior specie doesn't mean that most of us are like that (safari, that your 80% estimate get k-leg o )
Also, on the feminist side..we have some who want to wipe out the male existence and some guys attribute that to the whole ideology itself which shouldn't be.

Now unto the koko of the matter, humility should be found more in females (also has to be in the males...) just as decisiveness should be found more in males. This I think is the major input from the OP that people still can't comprehend, it doesn't mean it has to be in every issue where these traits have to show forth but in the major areas of family life.

I feel a man that puts his foot down in every issue no matter how trivial would soon lose respect from his wife....same way, a meek lady with hardly any input to a man would soon become nothing other than a glorified housewife.


Last bullet:
I want a lady that would not only fight for me but also with me so I can get better...but still accord me my respect as leader and protector if I'm playing my role's responsibilities.

No I was busy composing when you must have posted yours and it seem as though its the same person using two different handles. Lol

Sigh! Bro? Forget, we are not alone... We go find our own match sooner than later... God is on our side.

bettermike: Am sure you didnt see my post before puting out this post. Yet, we said the same thing. I just wish someone is learning. The wrong ideas have been flying on NL for too long.

GBAM!

bettermike: Self-confidence is a welcome trait anyday anytime. Most men want a confident woman by his side. However, FEMINISM IS A CONFRONTATIONAL KIND OF CONFIDENCE. Confronting others below you on the organogram (i.e. Kids, ur friends etc) is very okay. But not the husband. It will send the impression of a power tussle. We all know how wars end eventually. Plus feminism is requesting equality (50/50). Not bad but its best not practiced at home.

I'll answer it for my broda. Self confidence is suppose to make you know who you are, "I'm a woman, I have a womb and can bear children, I will marry a good man because I want to enjoy him and my children"... These is totally different from the kind of confidence that makes you to challenge authority. Challenging authority is mutiny and not equality. When a woman evolves she defends and later want control. That's the feminism scheme which you're acting knowingly or subconciously... Repent sister!

koyes: Ok, please answer this question honestly. Does a lady's self confidence have anytn to do with feminism? What is your defination of feminism?

Would you rather prefer a handle like warrior to a bitter--- person, I think the answer is NO because a bitter person might just yeid to your dominating force but under a warrior you feel like a slave for want of the abbility to humble yourself even those he shows all the love and care...


Bittermike- I'm just making a point don't take it personal. But watch out, she's working on you.

koyes: There are better ways of expressing your views. You have to accept that to be treated as a king,you have to treat your woman as a queen too and vice versa. But flee bags like warrior are only demon possessed oppressors and nothing more. The both of you are way different and do not speak the same language. You are better than that.

You're more knowledgable and more expose than me because you think you're are self confident enough to confront me? Sorry that's not exposure but a package of choas.

Advice for your sorrow gut. If you ever get a fianc, be humble to him by all means... Come back and tell us the result you get.

koyes: Certainly, age is no guarantee for maturity. Even with the degree(s) and so called exposure you claim you have,you still reason like a cave man. I say that because you have miserably failed to understand my message because i never implied with my previous posts that i was a feminist. I can boast that i'm more knowledgeable and exposed than you ever will be. Perhaps, that explains why we don't agree on anything. It would be a wasted effort reasoning with you so like i mentioned earlier, STEP ASIDE!

And who does she think she is. She is so confident to the fact that she thinks if she told you she was disapointed you would melt and switch side... Shame on her. Jezebel Hahaha

bettermike: Sweetie, its not about taking sides. Its about saying whats real fact. You are free to deny it or vex at the truth. That wont change the fact that the fact remains the fact. We men want to love and care for you women but your agression and its-my-right or we-are-equal is spoilling everything. Believe me, its entirely up to you sweetie. We men are ready to snap you up asap. Just turn a new leaf (no pretence pls) and see miracles happen.

Yes o brodaly. While they are busy training their confidence we would take the remaining few good once for wives. Then let them feminist and homo guys marry themselves and better still remain single and successful. Shame to feminism.

bettermike: Brother, i am seriously enjoying every post from you (no gay tins o). You are speaking my mind word for word. Dont mind bukatyne. She has alot of things so twisted. I'll leave you to continue hammering her and her crew. Shame on them all feminists.

And in your mind you feel so confident that you're good with words. Your comments stink of deciet and hypocricy. If you think I'm going to start defending myself while you are propagating attacks on my psyc then you fail... That's what self confident ladies do to a brother instead of show them love and respect, they try so hard to work on them and this annoys the suspecting brother and out of sore disapointment begins to fight back hard. Then you come back here to say the brother is rude, he's this and that... He raised his hand on me shit... You get back what you give a man. Its us that approach the ladies. If you're so confident why don't you start picking guys and caring for them. There are gay men out there willing to sumbit to you...

Isn't it true that a only true sista loves a nigga only bytches (self confident one) or lesbians don't? Answer me...

koyes: You are Misinterpreting the holy word of God to support the filthy words of satanists,fornicators,adulterers,gay men, drug lords and all sorts of people who do vile things. What wise sayings can come out of such people? Do you know what future awaits them. Go and read 1 corinthians 6 vs 9-11. Do you even respect God's word at all?! From this comment, i've now realised that i was right about you. A person does not need to dig further about the life style of someone to know the person. Your speech has said alot about you. You are at liberty to take my advice or disregard it.

I might be older than you, might be blessed with more degrees than you have presently, might be extraordinarily more exposed than you given the places I've travelled to; books I've read and life expiriences in general. So what makes you think you might know it better than me? Its either you're a juvenile extremist or you're just doing what you're being paid to do here...

In the real green world I don't see any issue in the topic being discussed here, to me its a total waste of time. Infact forums like this have had so much negative effect to my reasoning... It might be the same for you. You can't be sure of anything but not that its bad to find a (new) course and serve it. As for me I know the kind of person I am and who fits me... Stop fueling the world with divition here and there...

bukatyne: Dude,

Kindly learn how to converse in a mature at home

We see things in different ways and I cannot continue to explain one thing over again as I have something else to do.

Learn to read and understand what others are saying and not reading what you want to read

I wonder how some Nlers reason

You've met with your match and he kicked your butt... I'm taking a lesson from that bros. Must be an elderly man I assume...

bukatyne: Ok buddy,

Whatever rocks your boat

It's not about speaking grammer. I got tired of all that few years back.. Read your bible if you're a xstian then see what the book of solomon it calls the woman you're painting there... Self confident? Lol... She's an harlot. She can never be with one man. Sorry to say. Even in hip hop they're refered to as hoes and bytches... 2pac said fucc bytches cuz a true sister love a nigga. Kanye- lesbians never love a nigga... They will nag you to submition while they themself are self confident(of course one person must be the captain), press your mugu bottons for their own mischievious gains.
PS: I don't think I deserve to be treated as responsible or with respect. What do you even mean by that?

koyes: Lol...You can't imagine how you sound. It's obvious you lack understanding of what this topic is all about.Even with how you've degraded yourself with your disgusting life style, you still think you deserve to be treated as a responsible being when your defination of a real responsible, self confident woman is a jezebel to you. Don't get it twisted. You are mentally slow in learning and you need to go back to school to learn before you can say you deserve anything good in your sick, miserable life OR continue to crave and fight for your respect from your folks in the brothels and clubs. If the latter is your choice then step aside and let me continue my conversation with the respected,responsible real men and women on this thread.

Girls like you are the same glorified prostitutes I am talking about. Don't divert peoples attention away to brothels and clubs... You know what I'm talking about... Lol@end up with... As if you're able to read my desires. Prophetess of doom. What's even vexing you about being submisive sef? You still have an option of undergoing a gender rearrangement opperation or just kill yourself then come back as a man in your next life.


Edited: And yes, any girl/woman in my immediate family who thinks like you and the rest here is the same Jezebel like yourself... No bias. Continue doing your own and stop spoiling others for us... My mother never had a problem with submition yet she was a succesful woman. She was s second to a manager of a company, she sold cars in 2s and 3s, she also got a boutique.. I've been searching for a while now and keep selecting and filtering bytches like you all the time. I'm ambitious would never marry time bomb like yourself who can never support my ambitions but seek her own first and then steal part or all of mine... Up feminism, Up divas... Lol

koyes: You've just implicatated yourself on this thread. You've told nairalanders the kind of women in your immediate family,your miserable life style as someone who patronizes prostitutes,the dirty friends you surround yourself with. You've even given us a hint on the trashy person you'll end up choosing as your partner because believe me, your whole life stinks and it would take a person like you to smell and eat the same shit that you only know how to produce. I'm happy to say that i've never encountered a slowpoke like you. Why, because i'm allergic to foreign shit and poverty stricken neighborhoods!

The women I've encountered fight for my respect always turn out to be golddiggers/spoilt or glorified prostitutes... They eat their cakes and have it. They are all on this thread commenting.. Guys always be careful of any woman who wants your to respect her by force. She's a Jezebel... A word is enough for the wise.

koyes: Maybe you should read the comments of females on this thread again to fully understand their message. We are not against submissiveness. We are appalled at the way it has been misused by men who also use it to judge every single lady that is old enough to get married and sad to say, you are among them which is very pathetic. So you want to tell me that every single lady in her late 20's or 30's does not have a submissive spirit? Really,is that the only existing factor?have you given thought to the economic factor or the fact that most men are so Irresponsible that it would take an idiot to manage such a person? Secondly who gave you the right to tag young ladies in their late 20's and 30's as people who still don't have plenty oppurtunity to become wives and mothers in the future? You think they shouldn't see themselves as valuable as the younger ones,even when you've heard of how women in their 40's get married and have kids? It is this kind of insinuation that makes it difficult for ladies to be submissive to men with your mentality because people like you don't have respect for women. So before you lecture us, go back and do your home work so you can learn to do to others what you would like them to do to you.

You have the mouth of a truck driver...

bukatyne: Is submission an African quality?

It will not be out of place to assume that the average white woman might be more submissive than the African woman

No wonder most guys support oppression in marriage with 'this is Africa'

This thread stinks of a setup. I'm out

Just like your fathers before you... My point is that some people are beafing up these issues and they are benefiting from it. For example there would have be no need for a marraige counselor if everybody played their roles well... No?

You think I don't have a point eh? Don't worry... We'll someday see the same way. I'm a step ahead of you for now.

matnx: Nothing really changed... Nothing is new under old dear sun... The mind control scheme of the ancient royal families(illuminati) is at work. They intend to cuz more fight amongst everybody as jesus profesied. They infiltrated the medias, economy, politics and religion which the use to pass their mischievious messages. And while we are at it (distracted), they are settling it giving them the power of control over our destinies. Men are still bigger and stronger and we bear the bigger burden... You don't expect a pregnant woman or a nursing mother to be as powerful as her man, right? You can also send them to war, right? This is where the logic must have come from. Men fight and women stays at home. You don't expect a fighter to be as humble as you... Anyway that was a little joke of course. But take it seriously... Wake up all you living dead bodies. The man is your master by all means.. Serve him...


Don't worry we would send you to the jungle to live with lions and Gorillas. You would fit in perfectly!!

Nothing really changed... Nothing is new under old dear sun... The mind control scheme of the ancient royal families(illuminati) is at work. They intend to cuz more fight amongst everybody as jesus profesied. They infiltrated the medias, economy, politics and religion which the use to pass their mischievious messages. And while we are at it (distracted), they are settling it giving them the power of control over our destinies. Men are still bigger and stronger and we bear the bigger burden... You don't expect a pregnant woman or a nursing mother to be as powerful as her man, right? You can also send them to war, right? This is where the logic must have come from. Men fight and women stays at home. You don't expect a fighter to be as humble as you... Anyway that was a little joke of course. But take it seriously... Wake up all you living dead bodies. The man is your master by all means.. Serve him...

TDN: I'm just not sure we like that word SUBMIT. Sorry it gives me chills. On the other hand, let both of us agree we are equal for peace to reign. Times have changed, you guys should try to evolve. Why insist on living in the past.

Its very simple. Women can literally do anything you can and more, is it logical to ask that we call you master. Battle of the sexes will go on and on until men realise that women are human beings too. Why won't you accept that we simply can't comprehend submission and the question we should be asking is how do we relate to each other knowing the status quo has changed.

Young woman. You're not even paying attention to me...

safarigirl: are you an illiterate? That was the last census taken in 2006. 7 years later things could change eg HIV rate, the Nigerian population has increased by 20 million or more since then, so the HIV rate could increase/decrease in certain states. There are more men in Nigeria than women, the kids born from '07 till now can't change any of that because they're kids, unless you somehow killed over 2 million men, leaving the women alive, that fact hasn't changed. I'm using statistics and documented facts and you're spewing garbage off the top of your head. Or did you carry out a personal census of all the states?

You've just wasted your time sending the link... Which somebody like me know very well could be politically motivated... What do you think of benue state having highest % of hiv and now its cross river? Serious why do you expect me to drop what ig with my own eyes 30yrs coming and go for a link? You must be a clown. Like I said you're wasting your time... There are more women than men born in nigeria. All my friends have more girls than boys some don't have a baby boy yet they already got two girls. Look around you and find out for yourself and drop the link... Do you understand?

safarigirl: all that amounts to nothing. www.afrik-news.com/news12691.html www.nairaland.com/92409/official-nigerian-population-there-more . Use Google please

Aren't you the daft person here? Are you talking about the same Nigeria that men marry up to 2 wives and above? Your post stinks of feminism and politics. I think I'll pass...

Girls shine your eyes well o!!

PureOhio: Very däft.
The human sex ratio at birth is 105 boys to 100 girls. The overall world ratio is 101 males to 100 females.
Plus, Nigeria is one of those countries where there are more males than females.

What you should have said is that the number of men ready to get married is less than the number of women ready to get married. The main reason for that is the economy that's going in a downward spiral. Men need financial security to start a family. Women just want to be married to financially stable man.

Waitin dis one dey talk? I'm tellig you what I'm seeing you're there talking about Nigerian census... Infact post the link here make we see the census...

safarigirl: according to Nigeria's last population census, there are more males than females in Nigeria, do you plan to marry the baby girls born between 2007 till now? Are you related to Yerima?

Don't be a plunk... Go see how baby girls are being born everyday in 3z and 4z in one family compared to baby boy. Are you okay?

Otseh: He's lying.

Infact many of the men on this thread are lying about how there are so many single ladies, how it is 6 women to one man, how there are women of 30 and above in their church etc etc because they want women to panic and think that they have to settle for less and put up with any man that comes their way so they don't end up alone.

There are many single women fine;
There are also single men.

I don't know why nairaland men want to kill themselves over the issue of single women in nigeria. Every day single women this, single women that.
Una no dey tire?
Are the single women complaining abi why have you decided to carry their matter on your head?

Wolf my friend! Men are likes wolves that is tamed by a woman through humility... Now, that's a compliment for the women I guess.

favouredprince: Its funny how some of us react to dis post. My summary is dat men should love deir wives nd wives should submit to deir hubby, cos as christ is the head of d church so also is christ d head of d church.note dat nt all ladies can be loved nd u cant submit to all men, u do so at ur own peril.Am sorry am a bit religious bt d women controls d home tru humility nd nt by force.Men r like dogs dat can be tamed by women.

Actually its 6 woman to 1 man... Go and find out... Lol

bukatyne: You assume only women need correcting. You did not quote the verses I asked you to earlier. Everything has principles and if you do not follow it or if everyone does not play their part, it would fail no matter how others try to make it work.

I guess finding someone to marry is not as hard as courting right and sustaininbg the home.

I believe one of the issues is that women are no longer interested in settling for anything that has a d!ck. Are some women missing it? Yes;

If you want to see more ladies engaged and married, teach both men and women what they need to know. Over trained women around wild men is worse than untrained women around wild men.


Like I would say, there is a man for every woman out there.

No body is perfect and everybody is a project.

Whatever rocks your boat anyways.

Have a merry Christmas