₦airaland Forum

Michelle55:
guess that's the same thing your sister's boyfriends are saying about them. so it also applies to you

rebirthforgoody:
Am not supporting what your bea did and secondly please oga stop generalizing.

Mamabdul:
so long as your girl ain't cheating on you, you don't have a problem.. and it 'd have been nice if you didn't generalised it.. my own point of view is, "a lying lady could also cheat and she won't hesitate on doing that." no offense pls!

Michelle55:
then don't generalize.. that miss A acted stupidly doesn't imply that miss B will follow suit

alexis007:
Am I the only male on this planet devoted to achieving every aspiration I've dreamt about?

Op, you're a weak link in the chain of men who have done mighty works, from Nimrod to Alexander the Great to Putin. Forget the lady and face your destiny.

...It's not as if that's all the money she needs for a lifetime.

Adaumunocha:
OK now I understand what websurfer is going through. So dude even posted pre-wedding pictures?
Websurfer be wiser and stick to robotix advise.

robotix:
You got to take it easy bro. 26 and you are allowing pressure from your parents to push like this. Now I can see why you are a bit desperate.

You are a man and you have to let your parents know you are a man. Look, if you follow the pressure from your parents to push you into a ditch with this headless morons, you will be the one to suffer in the long run.... At best your parents will only give you advise and it will end there, while you would just be there alone bearing all the mysteries and burdens.

I know why I am telling you focus on a girl that has interest in you.

Basically it all depends on what a girl wants. For a guy, it is easy for but for a girl, her emotions has to be in sync. What matter is what she wants. It doesn't matter if the person she wants is less better than you, even if she stands a better prospects with you than the other guy. It is what she wants and you have got to let her have it.

For instance a girl I liked but didn't want me kept telling me she does not want me... We dated in the past but she ended it within 4 months. But I kept trying to have her. Now when she would come back she said she has someone but when I would check out the guy the day she uploaded his pic, in looks and otherwise, I am better. But that's what she wants.

Her phone was bad for 3 months and she needed just 7k to get it fixed... Whether she inflated the price o, I don't know anyway, I gave her the money. And she was back online but along the line I found out she doesn't really want me.... Even though the other guy couldn't give her the money to fix her phone for 3 months... She still chose him either way. I did spend in other areas too.

It is same thing that happened to my friend. He had better prospects than the guy his then ex cheated with... Even in finances he was ahead but she chose the other guy over him. Sadly the Honda pilot he bought for her is gone lol.

So bros, keep your money... Winning and keep a woman goes beyond that.

At this stage have fun... You are still young. You are thinking of marriage because they money is available or because you come a from a well to do family. What about us who don't have such luxury?

I have to hustle every dime I make, even while at it, I do not have any time to waste on people who don't want me...
Another thing is that you tend to make these girl's feel it is only them you have. Look, rejection make these girl's sit up...

Go out and pick as much as 3 girls... You can run them all if you want. You know what you want and so stick to the one that gives you the most attention.

Look women are more than men in population. FACT!

while typing this on my phone, a girl worked passed us and you know what? She has that pretty face I talked about. In body, she is okay. But the face is extremely beautiful.. And your boy is hooked

Hey, I am going out to try my chance bro. No time to worry about any other girl. I have another I really like and she has been playing hard to get and my steam is depleting already, unknown to her. It will get to a point where she would not get any attention from me anymore by the time she makes up her mind...but should I wail and wait for her just because she does not want to give in easily? Boy, women outnumbered us already.. For every man, there are about 4-5 women.

I told my friend that the girl that just walked passed us is very pretty. And he said he is gonna get her for me through the younger sister as they are friends since I am new around here.

Bros, no time to let any girl spoil your joy ooo. Go out and have fun. Stop being too serious with these girls.

Marriage is a long journey and you have got to be really really careful. Don't let anyone pressure you into marriage. Do it at your own pace.

Divay22:
Counselor
Dude knows what he's suppose to do, but he's not doing it...
He's about making same mistake he did the first time..

JONNYSPUTE:
. Exactly. You re now learning.

kense88:
It's only in nairaland we see different girls

Michelle55:
have you tried all the girls to have arrived at such a conclusion ?

robotix:
It's okay bro. You seems like an introvert to me and if yes, I will say a bit of the problem is due to lack of exposure. You should please and please man up.

The world is dog eat dog... People will use you and continue to use you till you die because you allow them... Even when they had begged you at their lowest ebb that they need your help, they will cross the line and take advantage of you when you let them.

Humans are selfish...

There is nothing bad about getting a stunner... But if you must, please let it be someone that is working. There are many of them.

Personally an extremely pretty lady that is not working or striving on her own is a turn off for me. I can almost bet that these girls you have been dealing with do not have any job. They are flashy and pretty but do not have anything meaningful that fetches them income and that is why they depend on men to foot their bills.

Bro, look for a lady that has handwork... I have come realise that ladies in this category are bit more reasonable in thoughts and deeds. Stop looking for those ones that looks like models in musical videos or movies.

There is nothing bad about that... But let it be someone that is at least making effort to make her own income.

You can find women in Church if you attend any or you can drive to Mall and engage in some convo with ladies, even bank. Just go out more. Dude you are not ugly, you are dark, tall and handsome...so where is all the problems coming from? Self esteem and how you carry yourself or see your self.

I don't know about you but I am very sensitive person. If a girl wants me, I will know. always look for signs. They should be the one fighting to be with you and not the other way round and you can make this happen.

With all these money being wasted on girls who don't give a flying fork about you, don't you think it is rather good to invest the money in your business or your own house building?

If I knew you were gonna give 200k, I would have stopped you. That's too much for girl you are not even sure of bro. Trust me, you may think that giving her that money to will earn you respect but honestly that shiiit just sent you 200,000 feet below in rank.

That money is enough to mould quite a lot of blocks bro.

Forget what you watch in movies... Forget all the bulshiiit girls tell you about wanting a caring man... In most cases, they respect a guy that does the opposite.

Let me use my friend as an example... The one he was spending his money on didnt love him or cared about him but the one while the one he wasn't giving attention to cared more about him. He even told me that he has never given her a dime in more than 3 years but she kept coming.

I read here on nairaland some months ago that women will respect you more when you show them you have money but don't give them. It's true to some extent, at least 80% of the time.


I will rather even act like I am a pauper in my current state and I am a good actor at that. That's how one girl was eating me based on my phone... In fact, within 20 minutes of our convo, I knew she was not interested in me... And I did well to end things as quick as possible.

Love yourself more.

Only hook up with a girl who is interested in YOU.

Michelle55:
all girls ain't the same.. op get your assertion right mbok

robotix:
Which one did you send 200k again? The one you engaged in 2016 that came back? SMH... You are just trying to buy love. You are buying love bro. STOP IT. STOP IT PLEASE. It makes you appear too needy and clingy and sadly, weakling.

See, women are smart. They are not dumb as dumb as we assume. They understand a man's emotion and they rule such men. If they don't understand you, they fear you.

When you are too available they abuse it. How about you tell that girl that wants to come and cook for you that you will be busy? How about you tell her you are not around and that would be less busy next weekend?

Look a girl once told me she does not understand me. The girl loves me to bit and I know it but I no send her. She has been angry because she hardly gets attention from me but if I beg her now I form one story give her she go accept.

I am sure she has other guys giving her attention but I know I am her top priority. Every girl is like that. They have that guy the so much want.

Cant you see these girls know your weak point and her preying on it?

You need as much male friends as possible bro to really groom you. Stay away from relationship as much as possible.

The average looking ones, yeah I know those too. It does not mean you can't get stunner but you just have to be everything a bit opposite of the current websurfer. Yeah., if that requires hiding your personality.

A girl I was even chasing late last year to early this year no send me and I stopped. While I focus on myself. In fact while at it then, my productivity level dropped. That's the effect of some of these girls with mami water beauty... She got that bad looking pretty face and fair skinned too. Her facebook account generate friend request faster than light and she accepts them all. In fact if that girl creates a new facebook account, give her like 1 month and she would have garnered over 3000 friends.

But when I stopped showing interest, what happened? Na she begin give me likes on my post more frequent than before. Even called me boss in one of my pictures uploaded. I had no idea as I was offline but a friend who knew about my relationship with her drew my attention to it.

Does this mean you can't get the girl you want? Certainly not. You can but I don't think you can achieve that with current personality.

If it's the girl you engage in 2016 that you gave that 200k, doesn't that send a message to you that it is not easy to find a guy that gives her money like you do? I mean since then to now, why hasn't she bought another phone? Doesn't that make you see your kind is hard to find? Or you think some ducks hasn't forked her all these while? Why didnt they buy her a phone?

They know your weak point and they are taking advantage of it. Sadly lover boys who like stunning beauty hardly ever control themselves. You have got to watch it bro... It is not their fault that you can't control yourself. Making such girls look like a demigod is your greatest weakness and undoing. Put an end to it all by being firm as MAN and watch, them fall in line.

If they offer you sex reject it... Reject them and make them feel they are NOTHING more than an ordinary human being. By the time you start making them feel like they are too special, you create problems for yourself. Why? Because every other guy does same... So they tend to see you as one of those whom they can lord it over. Can a god serve people who worship him? You make them feel like they are a god and you at the same time expect them to be loyal. You make them feel they are your master and at the same time want them to listen to you.

Things will change when you begin to make them feel there is nothing special about them.

robotix:
he doesn't seem to understand it yet that much of the problem is him.

izaray:
What then are u doing towards such attitude. Why not man up and tell her wat u want in ur relationship Or you guys are just ok with dat?

alexialin:
Websurfer stop dating slay mama's dem.

And all your worries and problems will be over.

Simple.

You place yourself in their target, with your eyes wide open then come. Online crying wolf.

O ga o

izaray:
Ah!! Dat's serious ooh

izaray:
It's far better than cheating with someone else to get d money, and u will admire those shoes on her too...was once a victim of dis same lies too But a changed person now

izaray:
Ah!! Guy easy nah, shuu...No be fight ..Have you even called ur bae attention to dis

robotix:
Hello Websurfer,

How are you doing today? I hope good.

As promised, I am writing this because of you after reading your lamentations for the past few days now. Funny enough, you created another one today.

I have been following you since last year after the engagement thread. We seem to share something in common...we are both lover boys, the kind described in romantic movies, the kind women claim that they want but I learned sadly rather unfortunately that in reality, they do not deserve this, majority.

Another thing I can deduce from your position and series of threads is that you are too soft, especially with women.

You like flashy pretty girls, you have good eyes for pretty women... I am same too. At least if your engagement pics is anything to go by, that girl there was really beautiful.

I have vowed I will NEVER marry a lady who is not above average pretty. Though I prefer really pretty face and do not attached much importance to the body as long as she is not fat but moderately built, tall slim with a bit of figure is a stunner, at least I am tall, just 0.2 less than 6 ft.

In fact a friend noticed and told me that I like girls who are very stunning (but he can not date or marry such girls for fear lol), which is true but sadly, as I found out, you can not handle such girls being soft... bro. When you add to the fact that they are center of attraction from other guys, you can imagine the pride and ego that goes with it.

An average Nigerian can not handle power or influence with humility, so how do you expect a pretty Nigerian girl who get attention from a lot of guys to be stable without being proud? It practically throws them into more confusion. Only the one who knows what she wants due to discipline and good home training can handle but they are very very very RARE!

And that is why you need to re-invent yourself. You are an entrepreneur and you need as much focus as possible. How about working expanding your business?

Just like me, you are quick to start spending money on a girl or buying her gift. I have stopped doing that when I discovered something...

The problem we have as lover boys is that we think being nice to a girl is all that we need to do make them stay and love us... ERROR 404. It is NOT. It goes beyond being NICE...

You have to, after making your intention known that you want her, step back and observe... FIND OUT WHAT SHE WANTS! FORK emotions, FORK her pretty face... I learned long ago that how you start a relationship with a girl is VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT! If you start by spending money, they will abuse it, especially those ones with lots of fun loving female friends. ladies are their own enemies and they give bad advises to each other and how do you hope to cope?

You love her, you like her, you want to give her your best.. eh, bros, we have heard all that... what does she wants? Do you know what she wants? Look, you had better spend over 80% of your time finding out IF SHE WANTS you or what she wants to give than anything else. A lot of Nigerian girls are parasites, leeches and opportunist...

They do not want you and they will not tell you but will keep collecting what you give them. I learned this lesson the hard way. How can you buy that girl iphone 7? Did you find out if she is really worth doing that for? Bro, to be honest, the problem is not them, it IS you. I used to do all that... I even know a friend whose account of over 25Million Naira was reduced to nothing because of a girl who didn't want him and he kept spending and even bought Honda Pilot for her around 2014.

They always leave clues but we ignore them and the clues are in their actions. Frankly, if a girl does not love you, bros, there is nothing you can do. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING and no amount of money , as my friend later found out late, in the world can change that

Look, every girl has that guy they respect... any girl that disrespect you in any form is NOT FOR YOU, she belongs to someone else.

So bro, if you really want to stop all these cry all over Nairaland, you have to focus your light on more important things by finding out IF SHE REALLY wants you and what you want to offer, what she is willing to sacrifice for it. From all I have seen you wrote, bro, those girls are not interested in you. THEY ARE NOT! Find another one and kick that slowpoke who came back to wherever she came from.

I know you are focus, I know you just want ONE GIRL to call yours... but you have to know that your kind is also rare to come by and so, bury that nice guy... STOP BEING NICE. When they complain about being in need, feign deafness and even promise and FAIL. Trust me, you will gain some respect that way... than the one who succumb to their every demands. You are too nice bro. STOP IT! You are too soft... STOP IT.

It is not like you are ugly why let these girls keep taking you for granted... in fact start an undefined relationship with anyone you like... do not take them serious. Ladies like SUSPENSE.. give them overdose of it.

You are focusing too much energy on the wrong thing... In business every success obey one rule: Find out what people want, give them and watch your bank account swell astronomically and if you have little or no competitor while doing that, bro, you will be stinking rich!

bettercreature:
She want to tell us she owns that g- wagon or what

IAMSASHY:
exactly Y I sed u shudnt generalize, as far as ur topic is concerned, ur sisters ar inclusive

Money2000:
My LGA chairman use to bang this girl... I have proofs!

izaray:
Hahahah, this got me laughing real hard.. Cha!! Women don suffer for una hand. Op, you nerver ever tell lies before

IAMSASHY:
I blive u hv sisters, cousin sisters, a mum and possibly, future daughters, ar dey inclusive? U dnt generalize tins like dis. Dat ur gf lied doesn't mean odas ar same and besides, Tel me u hv neva lied to 2 anyone b4. Wat she did is bad bt Let he who is wtout sin first cast d stone