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I was 5 years old when I was sexually abused. I never spoke to anyone about this, but when I red ur story I felt sad! My mum was a single mum and worked very hard. She hardly had time to take care of me and hired a nanny, to do the caring. My nanny was a very nice austrian (white) women, who herself was childless and used to spoil me rotten! One day she decided to take me to her family and introduced me to them. Her mum adored me from the very beginning, but her step dad was weird and treated my like a dog. He was quite old and was an ex soldier in the second world war in austria. I used to visit them more often and he used to make racist comment about black people, which would make his wife and his daughter ( my nanny) furious. I woke up one morning and saw him stare at me with so much hatred and he asked me to get him his shoes.I was quite young but felt in me that he was someone that I should not disobey. I got his shoes for him and he was suddenly really nice to me and offered me some sweets, but told me not to tell my nanny, since she did not like the idea of me having sweets in the morning. I started liking him,I however noticed that he was only nice to me in the absence of his family. I got used to him and he would buy me sweets (chocolate, biscuits etc..). One day he, however asked me to sit on his lap and I can remember how his hands went under my skirt and my pants and how he started rubbing my private part . It hurt so much and I felt sick. I went to the toilet, and saw blood and thought that I was going to die. I was crying and complaining of tummy ache and when my nanny came to look for me, all he ( her step dad) could tell her was, that I had the tummy ache and that I have been having a lot of sweets. My nanny and her mom used to bathe me and when they did that a day after the incident they noticed that my private part was red and swollen. I also started wetting my bed for 2 years after the abuse. I could not make sense of what happened to me and never told my nanny or mom. It would have broken their hearts. The old man, died when I turned 9 years! He was lucky since he escaped the law, just as Jimmy Saville did and as so many other paedophiles ! They will however not be able to escape the Highest Judge in heaven!!!

Wow Pauli your story moved me and shook my heart like a storm!

So did you ever told your mom about that incident if I'm not being intrusive? And what are the measures taken by her when you did?

She( Mom) must have been very busy probably to make ends meet to allow your nanny to take you to her residence...wow !.... I'm not judging her .... it was what it was.

I am a frequent use of nanny services and they are part of my support network when it comes to my childcare... However things are changing more than before and technology is been great.

Well that's all I can say, it must have been very traumatic for you and I have learned some lesson in your story . Thank you.

Wow OP! I'm short for words! A priest ? Lord have mercy!

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@op, im touched by ur story, if a priest can do that, then what are we talking about, we have to be very vigilant as regards our children.

@paulicoro, so sorry 4 what happened to u, i hope it didnt affect u when u are grown up?

@pauli coco thank you for puttin ur story here. Id love for more people to write their own stories. this is very important, i believe Nigerians need to be aware of this vile evil acts that no one wants to talk about. I know there are a lot of you out there who have gone through the same ordeal i have, and it would be a step forward (regardless how little it may seem to you) if you talk about it here.
#judgefreezone

and thank you for everyone of you who has shown support with you positive comments.
and i also want to advice parents or would be parents, BOTH MOMS AND DADS out there, you need to start NOW to lecture your children about being with ADULT STRANGERS, and how an adult stranger OR FAMILY MEMBER can touch them and where they can touch them.
My uncle, who is a doctor, has two small children ages 3 and 4, both of them Christine and Ofure know that if they feel they are in an uncomfrotable position with an adult, regardless of if the person is their teacher, family member or a starnger, they have to report the situation to either my uncle or their mom. Parents you can START NOW to teach your kids what to do and who to talk to if they feel they've been put in an uncomfortable situation. Peadophiles SHOULD NOT be allowed to continue to walk free!!
#judgefreezone
#befree
#findyourvoice

Hmm! I think the abuse affected me in many ways. I never managed to tell my mum. It would break her heart. The poor woman worked so hard and was hit with traumatic events, losing my dad when she was 5 years into her marriage and 5 months pregnant ( with me). She had to focus on me and her family. Being the first born in the family, she had to work extra hard to bring food on the table for me and for them back home! God will heal my wounds.

Parents should be careful with house help either male or female. I was sexually abused at the age of 7, by our hose help (a male).My parents were not arround, so he took I and my younger brother to his room. When I was sleeping I discovered that he was touching my body and was removing my pant, luckily for me my dad came back at dat time, so when he heard d sound of my dad's car he quickly adjust my dress and help me to wear my pant back.The following day i told my mum,and she told my dad and the guy was sent away.

Ha!

And Nigerians like to trust all these maids, aunties and uncles. I now see why my parents chased away all house helps as soon as my older ones turned 12. We also were never allowed to sleep outside till we were fully grown and rotten in university. No nanny was allowed to bring men into the house or take us to anybody's house. i used to cry and be upset that i could not stay at a cousins house or family friend during the vacation. I really didnt understand and felt i missed out so much. I really thank God now in hindsight. I am really trying to get this business rolling so i stay home till our future kids start school. na wa o!

yea, me too! im not planning on getting a nanny or house help either! it'll be my husband, my kids and I!

Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraise MY AGNOSTIC GOD!
I never saw such evil. . .those were truly innocent days!
Unlike now!

If I were. . . I WOULD BE THE FIRST TO START SHOUTING TO EXPOSE THE CULPRIT EVEN IN MY OLD AGE!
I nor kia if na my papa o!
Eim go hiarrrrrrrrrrrrrrram!

Not surprised about the priest own. Heard of guys been molested by this so called 'Priests'. U can just imagine.
Back in primary school days, I and my siblings stayed at my neighbour's house on getting back from school till my mum gets back from work. As far as i can recollect,the eldest daughter of my neighbour plays with my joystick then, when alone with her. This happened on few occasions [cant remember sha]. Anyways,it never affected me while growing up

@OP Intimate abuse almost ruined my life and my marriage. Thanks to some NL members especially SISIKILL that saved my life. It is happening in most homes and it's heart breaking when some parents make it look as a n0n-issue some telling me it happened to them but that its "normal now" part of growing up. When i finally opened up to even my own mum she was like " my dear, these things happen " and even told me of her own experience as a kid mind you she is 63.

Part of my healing came from talking to parents during my son's PTA meeting and in my office. I pray often for my sons cause really you never can tell where these perverts could be lurking. Even your best friend could be ur kid's worst nightmare.

Very touching stories nd a lot of views but a lot have refused to say their own stories.

I have been molested by a very close cousin dat was living in our house. It started wen I was 7yrs old. It was always on the pretense of play. At a point he even said it was an exercise. ( The tot alone is killin me)
I can remember when he ejaculates I'll ask why he is urinating on my body. It happened for yrs and I didn't tell anyone cos I didn't even know that it was to my own detriment.
Wen I grew older and now realised wat he has been doing I didn't tell anyone because I was afraid and my family might not believe.

Along the same line, another family friend tried d same tin whenever I had to sleep in their house wen my parents travelled to our hometown. I hated d guy 4 yrs even though he was not successful at what he wanted to do.

I still Ơ̴̴̴̴͡.̮Ơ̴̴̴͡ my cousin till date, there was a day he asked me if I can remember anytin dat happened wen I was younger, I just walked away cos dats a part of me dat I'll rather forget. Am sure he feels I can't remember since I didn't answer him.
Tank God 4 Christ, getting closer to God helped me in forgiving these people but the tot hurts.
And ofcourse, its affects the way u Ơ̴̴̴̴͡.̮Ơ̴̴̴͡ men.
Am presently married but I have never discussed it with my hubby and I pray I don't ever have to tell him.

Parents should be careful of who they leave their kids with. Even some siblings do it. A close friend of mine was raped by her step brother. Some people have been molested by their drivers.
Now I keep praying that I don't have a daughter cos I would probably keep her under lock and key cos I'll do anytin to protect her.

It has only proved dat no one is to be trusted in our community

Speaking about priests & molestation. I still remember my own experience vividly. But I won't mention names.
When I was about 10, I used to go to our Catholic priest's house to receive phone calls from my elder sister who at that time got a job in Lagos. There was no GSM reception then. So we'd agree on a time when she will call me from work.
Before this, my best friend at that time used to tell me that our Rev. Fr. used to make advances at her. I always didn't know whether or not to believe her bc I was taught to respect our priests bc they're holy and anointed. But I just knew to be careful around him.
So on that day, I was siting in his small living area/office waiting for my sister's call. Other days he wasn't usually present. But that day he was and as the phone rang, he asked to come and pick it up. As I did, he came behind me, grabbed me, squeezing my breast. I managed to remove this hands and run out of there fast. That was the last time I went there. I told my sister about this but not my parents. I'm grateful it did not go farther than that.
Please note that I am not condemning catholic priests. I still have respect for the ones that deserve the respect.

Op reminds me of wat I went tru as a kid. I'm talkin abt age 3. I wz molested by our housemaid, she wz in mid 20s den. Evry evening she wil tel me to sleep on her tommy while my sis wil sleep on d bed, all dis hapend wen my mum wz on nite duty and wen she wud come bak we all wud hve slpt. She wud off all d light and remuv my joystick and put inside her kitty katty and b thrusting me. D wz a day I told her I wanted to urinate and she said I shud do dat inside her. She always begged me nt to tel anyone and I kept it a secret sha. Gosh! Wen I rememba all those tings I always feel bad

ifyeky'S case ws like mine but the difference is that the girl is not our maid but our neighbor's.
I went to the place to play on Saturday oo, as we playing, she came in to the sitting room and harassed us not to dirty the place, she singled me out as the neatest, the only person that will follow her to the most decorated room in their apartment, I followed her thinking its for good. I may be 6 or 7years then. She told me to go to the bed and stay, I did. She came to the bed, UnCloth herself and me too, I was surprise and was watching her helplessly as she clutch my joystick to her V. I was in shock and I ran out. She warned me neva to say it outside which I neva did till now am writing this. I can't forget this though uy tried to erase it bt its still sharp on my memory. She is married now wit Kids. It tormented when ever I wanted to brag then in seminary that am still a virgin boy, I'll remember that incident and become moody. Am I still a virgin boy friends?

This stories make me really sad . Children are being robbed their innocence and the molesters carry on living normal lives, as men of God or married men and women... Potentially even mums and dads. I assume that they do not molest their kids and may even be overprotected over them. May God judge them, because victims are meeting up here on nairaland, being disturbed in one way or another due to the traumatic experience

When I ws 8, my Dad had a worker who he usually sent 2 d house sometimes on errands. We were used 2him coming around bt I tried 2stay away frm him. He always seemed 2be trying 2touch me in ways dat made me feel uncomfortable.

On dis fateful day, my parents were @ work and siblings were out playing whn he came around. It had rained & d guy walked in2 d living room wt his boots heavily caked wt mud. My first complaint was how I'd have 2 clean d rug all over again.

Then he started undressing, undid his belt,dropped his shorts, & took hold of his 'watever'. He tried 2 grab me, bt I tried 2get away. He caught me once, bt I wriggled free, then I was boxed into a corner where I cud nt escape. I knew wat he was trying 2do was wrong. Then I said..

Me: I will tell Daddy.
Guy: That what??
Me: That U were 'off-ing' Ur trouser in front of me.

At dat he panicked, pulled his shorts up & started begging me not 2 tell. I just gave him a broom 2 sweep off all d sand he had brought in (he did it wt so much enthusiasm). He pleaded dat I should not tell.

Somehow, I didn't tell.

Don't really knw Y. Maybe I felt I had handled d situation well.

@Winneygirl, Great job! you handled the situation superbly, Im glad it got as far as it did and that you took control.
#judgefreezone #takecontrol

There's one common fact about 90% of d stories dt have bn shared here. D victims neva told anyone. And I can only attribute it to d fact dt parents even though dey r fully aware of the possibilities of their children being sexually molested, prefer to deny it as "not dia portion" rather dan broach d topic wt dia kids. A friend once told me hw she taught her 8yr old daughter to always scream wenever any man(including her Daddy) or woman tried to touch her in any way dt indicates sexual molestation, I was shocked n naturally rebuked her at d mention of Daddy, but now I see a lot of sense in it. Parents shld teach their kids not to keep mute during any such molestation or aftr it, whether or not it was successful

Age 13, me and our 21-yr-old house help! I nor even know who abuse each other, whether na me abuse am abi na she abuse me, I enjoyed it sha!

On a more sober note, parents/guardian needs to be extra vigilant where kids are involved! Forget whether she's a trusted aunt or uncle (particularly house help) , only leave ur kids/wards with peeps you can absolutely vouch for!