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Stats: 1,900,172 members, 3,870,471 topics. Date: Monday, 23 October 2017 at 11:45 PM
|An Interview With God by Reverend(m): 11:58am On Apr 19, 2006|
I dreamed I had an interview with God.
"So you would like to interview me?" God asked.
"If you have the time" I said.
God smiled. "We have until your alarm clock rings.
What questions do you have in mind for me?"
"What surprises you most about humankind?"
"That by worrying about the afterlife,
they throw away their one real life,
sometimes literally by trusting prayer instead of medicine,
or flying a plane into a building full of infidels."
"That with thousands dead from an 'Act of God',
they flock to churches like flies to a bloated corpse."
"That with all their fantastic science,
and libraries full of great literature
they still think glurge like this is profound"
God's hand took mine
and we were silent for a while.
And then I asked,
"As a parent, what are some of life's lessons
you want your children to learn?"
"To learn that to make someone love you,
make them feel guilty for your sacrifices.
and if that doesn't work,
make their life hell."
"To learn to forgive by killing your own son,
but don't forget to blame the Jews."
"To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to kill those you love,
but three days to bring them back."
"To learn that a rich person
is not one who works hard,
but one who knows how to make a buck
off of cheap sentimentality like this."
"To learn that there are people
who say they love you dearly,
but really hope you burn in hell
because you have more sex than they do."
"To learn that two people can
look at the same thing
and see it differently,
but it takes religion
to make that into a long bloody war."
"To learn that it is not enough that they
forgive one another;
they must get a priest to do it."
"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.
"Is there anything else
you would like your children to know?"
God smiled and said,
"Just know that I am , only a dream."
© Rev. James Huber, (firstname.lastname@example.org)
|Re: An Interview With God by layi(m): 12:31pm On Apr 28, 2006|
Confusing revelelation of GOD as a killer. A joke not too nice.
|Re: An Interview With God by babymine(f): 1:30pm On Apr 28, 2006|
What's wrong with this guy?
Methinks you're going too far.
|Re: An Interview With God by KAG: 3:52pm On Apr 28, 2006|
Just a few problems with the Omni- God concept and true believers (TM), if you ask me. Good stuff though.
|Re: An Interview With God by amaks: 6:44pm On Sep 04, 2007|
reverend,come and explain urself,and tell us if u really believe in what u posted.
r u just hiding under this "dream" of yours,and expressing your perconal veiws,opinions?
|Re: An Interview With God by Nobody: 1:27am On Nov 14, 2012|
Be like say na devil visit you O
|Re: An Interview With God by UyiIredia(m): 1:46am On Nov 14, 2012|
2buff: Be like say na devil visit you O
|Re: An Interview With God by CrazyMan(m): 12:35pm On Nov 14, 2012|
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