Two turtles go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they've forgotten a bottle opener. The first turtle turns to the second and says,
"You've gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer."
"No way," says the second. "By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food."

"I promise I won't," says the turtle. "Just hurry!"

Nineteen full days passed and there's still no sign of the second turtle. Exasperated and starving, the first turtle digs into the sandwiches.

Suddenly, the second turtle pops out from behind a rock and yells, "I knew it! I'm not fucking going!"

One day, up in the frozen north a polar bear and his son were out for a stroll. Daddy bear sat on a lump of ice to admire the view and sent his son off to play. Two minutes later Junior came back to dad and says, "Can I ask you a question dad?"

"Sure, son what is it?"

"Am I a real polar bear, Dad?" asks Junior.

Dad smiles and says, "Of course you are, son. Now go and play."

So off Junior goes again throws some snowballs at the seals but soon he's back.

"Hey Dad, are you sure I am a real polar bear? Is there not a wee bit of brown bear or black bear in me?"

Dad smiles again and says, "Look son you've got big hairy black feet, a white coat, and a black shiny nose, of course you're a polar bear, now go back and play."

Once again Junior runs off, slides down the ice, chases a couple of seagulls, after ten minutes of fun
he returns with a puzzled look on his face,

"Daaaad, are you absolutely sure I'm a polar bear?"

"Look son, I'm a polar bear, your mums a polar bear, your granny and grandpa were polar bears, why
are you asking all these questions?"

Junior looks up and says, Cause I'm fucking freezing!

cool

Jerry Falwell was seated next to President

Clinton on a recent flight. Once
the plane was airborne, the flight attendant

came around for drink orders.
The President asked for a whiskey and soda.

The flight attendant then asked
the minister if he too would like a
drink. Mr. Falwell replied in disgust,

"Ma'am, I'd rather be savagely raped
by a brazen LovePeddler, than let liquor touch

these lips." The President then
handed his drink back to the flight attendant

and said, "My apologies, I
didn't realize there was a choice, I'll have

the same thing he's having!

O boy well done

Wen i enter PH, i go fire you 2 bottles of 33 extra lager beer

@poster
u bad o!

good job kronky. my butts fell out while i was laughing.

abeg find ur butt oooo


i no go fit help person pack shit!

shit packer

just like u huh!

buhahahhhha lol

heyy man dat was really kool
ure doing a good job keepn clem jolly

U too like freee things

okay i hear yu. . . .


take dis candy and don't come and boda me again

She go still beg u

and i go flog her hard. . . . . .

bla bla bla stylee

. . . now migines don show face?

. . . .wetin go come happen

donkey d mon key



lol, roflomao

hmmmmmmmmmmm