Why is it that a lot of Nigerians do not accept that one can be very fatigued or ill until the person collapses or presents any other form of emergency?

I cannot count the number of times people have asked for more of my time and/or effort even when I tell them I am very tired.

Dont talk to "Nigerians". Talk to a few doctors. They tend to know a lot about these health things.

Seun: Dont talk to "Nigerians". Talk to a few doctors. They tend to know a lot about these health things.

You mean doctors understand the psychology of Nigerians on the matter? It is a very personal topic for me- I just experienced it a few minutes ago hence my creating this thread.

^Ok, but I do have this impression that Nigerians are working themselves to death. Life expectancy here is not very high and I am just amazed at how even family members will continue to ask you to do XYZ for them and you are literally gasping for breath but they won't believe that until you collapse or worse.

Seun: Dont talk to "Nigerians". Talk to a few doctors. They tend to know a lot about these health things.

I don't think it's a doctor thing.

People generally will not believe until u act it.

So, if you are tired, show it. lol

^ lols abi o. How else do you expect anyone to know your activities are taking a toll on you if you don't show it outwardly? We humans just love to work ourselves beyond our capacities.

dominique: ^ lols abi o. How else do you expect anyone to know your activities are taking a toll on you if you don't [b]show it [/b]outwardly? We humans just love to work ourselves beyond our capacities.

Saying it is not enough for you? The person has to show you? Is tiredness not abstract?

maclatunji:


Saying it is not enough for you? The person has to show you? Is tiredness not abstract?

It is, but there is a way u will look that people will know that you are tired.

Although, u can set a limit for yourself and decide not to work further when you feel in a particular way or when it is a particular time of the day, but people would not understand this, so you have to provide physical evidence if u want them to back off.

It's just the way people are generally. There is a tendency to want to stretch you beyond your limit.

Tgirl4real:

It is, but there is a way u will look that people will know that you are tired.

Although, u can set a limit for yourself and decide not to work further when you feel in a particular way or when it is a particular time of the day, but people would not understand this, so you have to provide physical evidence if u want them to back off.

It's just the way people are generally. There is a tendency to want to stretch you beyond your limit.

I have a problem then because I look perfectly fine even when stressed. Hence, I have to relay my tiredness verbally.

maclatunji:

I have a problem then because I look perfectly fine even when stressed. Hence, I have to relay my tiredness verbally.

lol.

Then learn to look tired when u are tired.

Walk and act sluggishly.

Lie down even when you are not sleepy.

Keeping yawning why working at the assignment, d person will collect it from you so that u don't type/write rubbish.

And so on. lol

maclatunji:

I have a problem then because I look perfectly fine even when stressed. Hence, I have to relay my tiredness verbally.

You don't have a problem, I am the same in that sense. I use a technique that works well, especially on my mum who always wants things done NOW regardless of whether you're worn out or not.

1. Calmly tell them you're tired.
2. If they continue to ask you to do things, acknowledge them, but don't do anything.
3. If they come back complaining about why you've not done what they've asked, calmly inform them that you told them you were tired and - this is very important - still don't do anything.
4. Only carry out the task once you are rested/well and able to.

Repeat the above cycle a number of times and people will begin get the message. Some say it's passive-aggressive, I say it's effective.

There are some thick/inconsiderate folk that will still not get the message, but those ones are irredeemable. The above should work most of the time.

dominique: ^ lols abi o. How else do you expect anyone to know your activities are taking a toll on you if you don't show it outwardly? We humans just love to work ourselves beyond our capacities.

Thanks for your words at the mod section, mod power has been restored,I'm thinking of stepping down, but I have just had a conversation with my co-mod, will carry on.
I could have acknowledged you guys at the mod section, but seems my ban still stands . Thanks

debosky:

You don't have a problem, I am the same in that sense. I use a technique that works well, especially on my mum who always wants things done NOW regardless of whether you're worn out or not.

1. Calmly tell them you're tired.
2. If they continue to ask you to do things, acknowledge them, but don't do anything.
3. If they come back complaining about why you've not done what they've asked, calmly inform them that you told them you were tired and - this is very important - still don't do anything.
4. Only carry out the task once you are rested/well and able to.

Repeat the above cycle a number of times and people will begin get the message. Some say it's passive-aggressive, I say it's effective.

There are some thick/inconsiderate folk that will still not get the message, but those ones are irredeemable. The above should work most of the time.

@bolded, #Smiling. Maybe I am too soft but considering the fact that I might as well be called "Ivan the Terrible" on Nairaland, you can understand my reluctance to snap at people in real life. Most people know of my firmness in real life by my actions not my words.

I have not gotten the right mix to get people of my back yet. However, I am tempted by the concept of "abdication" of duties and rejection of requests when totally burnt out.

^^ No need to snap at all. . . when you calmly refuse and then ignore, they'll get the message eventually.

Heck next time, they'll be confused as to whether to ask you or not because they can't tell externally when you're tired.

debosky: ^^ No need to snap at all. . . when you calmly refuse and then ignore, they'll get the message eventually.

Heck next time, they'll be confused as to whether to ask you or not because they can't tell externally when you're tired.

lol

That ur style na wa. Funny, that is exactly what I do too. I collect, ignore it and do it when I can esp. to my hubby.

I usually don't refuse my mum even when I am dog tired cos when she insists, it's usually for what she can't get done in another way.