(1)Since José Mourinho got sacked by
Chelsea in 2007.
Chelsea have won 7 trophies and Arsenal
have won 0."
(2)When you scream God's name during
sex, Iwonder if
you're trying to remind Him to punish u
later."
(3)The day a Ghost got involved in an
accidentwas the
day i stopped watching Nollywood."
(4)What's the relationship between Rain &
PHCN in
Nigeria? It seems almost like an automatic
switch
thing..
(5)Someone walks up to u drinking Ice-
Creamand tells
u to help him with T-fare cos he's
Stranded..pls shoot
Him!"
(6)He did the Exam so well that He Took
the Answer
Scripts Home to show His Room-mates"
(7) That awkward moment when you
type"Trophyless"
on Google and the result shows"Arsenal""
(Just put currency sign in front of your
pin and igbo
girls would add you. $2737A4A7"
(9) sweat from some girls' armpits will turn
blue litmus
paper red."
(10)If your Girlfriend refuses to accept the
Bible &
anointing oil or Qu'ran as Vals gift, free
her, na WITCH"
(11)They say love is more important than
money. Pls
try paying a lagos conductorur with a
hug?"
(12)In a Nigerian Home...If your friend
forgetsto greet
your parents, that's the end of that
friendship.if you
agree"
(13)Women are like police, they might
have allthe
evidence in the world but they still want a
confession!"
(14)People That Smoke Weed Before
Going ToChurch.
You Wanna Compete With The Most
High?"
(15)In a Naija Home, ur parents will call u
frm ur room
to pick up something that is sitting literally
2inches
away from them.
(16)If God's Plan For You is BROWN TEETH,
Even IRON
SPONGE Cannot Change It!"
(17)If 80k brazilian hair couldn't get you a
good
husband, why not use it to pay a counselor
to talk good
sense into your life"
(18) Ushers sef.. Dey won't allow one
sleep comfortably
during service.. Thought the house of God
is also my
father's house?"
(19)The hot girl next to me in class just
fell asleep.
Maybe I should fall asleep too..so I can tell
my friends I
slept wit her?"
(20)WHITE KID: "Shut Up Dad"!!; * Dad
shuts up* DAD-
*Shut too* 9JA KID: "Pale, Shut up abeg"
*wakes
up*....where am i?....DOCTOR:
Oloshi..Igbobi Hospital"
(21)A slap is a manual override
mechanism used to
rectify a person acting like a fool.....no one
is above a
manual reset."
(22)Some Igbo people with their names
tho, how can
you be naming identical twins"Praise and
Worship"?"
(23)U opend Ur legs & he bought U BOLD
5, U opend 4
anoda guy & he paid for Ur BIS. Pls open 4
me too,
lemme buy U d Charger."
(24)And So, I was watching a yoruba
movie...and this
Guy shot himself in the head
THRICE...Awon
Oloriburuku!!"
(25)Someone Blocked His Dad on
facebook, the Dad
also Blocked Him from entering the House
(26)One rapper just said "My blood is so
full, call me
'bloody fool'".......Wh y lord?
(27) U can't recite a Bible Passage! but u
can mention
68 Hotels & Clubs in Lagos without
thinking? My Sista,
ur life is blinkin on a low ba3!"
(28)Marrying a lady whose cooking skills
can only be
compared to Victor IKPEBA's English
issuicide."
(29)All women MUST get married! No man
should go
unpunished!"
(30)Its only a Yoruba Father that Prices
SchoolFees!"
(31) You try to call your GF from a public
call centre on
her street, and Her number appearsas
'Sweet Heart'
GOOD DAY PALS