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Is it worth fighting over land and property left behind by the deceased when things turn nasty?

A close knit extended family which had for many years shared celebrations and pain suddenly split into feuding factions. The object of contention: land and property.

The most senior family member, Ayodele, died leaving two houses and two parcels of land. He built the first house as he rose through the ranks of a glowing career. It didn't come easy, but with determination his efforts as a young married man who wanted to provide more comfort for his treasured wife and kids, yielded fruits. He eventually turned this into a modest block of four flats. In later years, having more wealth and a higher status, he built the second house, a stately mansion with two boys' quarters in which he and his wife died peacefully seven years apart.

There are two main matters of contention. Firstly, did he say the mansion would automatically become the property of his extended family because he was the olori ebi (head of the family) and there is no other family house? Secondly, did he or did he not promise the other house to his youngest brother?

Ayodele's father left a dilapidated house which eventually evaporated off the surface of the earth. The rumour is that one of the brothers ‘swallowed’ the money contributed towards rebuilding it. No one has attempted to rebuild it since. Some say that the land is cursed and anything built on it wouldn’t stand anyway. In the absence of anything to call the family house, Ayodele’s brothers say that he had always said that his house would become the extended family’s home.

As the story goes, Ayodele often sent his youngest brother, Ayodipupo to collect rent from the second property while he was studying in university. Sometimes, he allowed him to keep all or some of the rent as pocket money. If that’s the case, then that doesn't make Ayodipupo the owner, abi?!

The feud has not been a mere battle of assertive or scathing words; there have been threats, cursing and strange occurrences that seem more than just coincidence. Ayodele’s seven brothers are showing a rather nasty side of their character never seen before; they have let the matter breed discord among them and their brother’s children.

Ayodele’s three children have differing views over whether to fight for the properties and land or not. Tele, the eldest, has completely washed his hands free of everything. Teni is too principled to let go; he said the properties are his right, his inheritance shared with his siblings. He is not happy that Tele is not showing the leadership he would expect. Tolu, the youngest isn’t bothered either way; she says she is a girl now married into another family. They all own several modern properties and are well to do in their own right.

Five years ago, Ayodele remarried and had another son. His second wife escaped from the cross-fire with her two year old preferring to preserve her life and dignity. A high profile lawyer, she is still contemplating what to do. She had a very good relationship with Ayodele’s entire family till his death. If she decides to challenge the family for the sake of her son, she might fall out with his other children - she doesn’t want that.

‘Wasn’t there a will?’ someone may ask. Good question but wrong question. The question is, ‘Which one is THE will?’ The battle is really about the authenticity of Ayodele’s will. Several wills have surfaced but it has been difficult to establish which one is the final and true version. Whichever will you chose someone is going to be very unhappy.

Some say it is cowardice not to fight while others just wonder whether it is really worth the palaver fighting over bricks and mortar. What do you think?

Karis ‘Tunmb Kayode is a personal performance coach and corporate communications professional. She writes and speaks on a range of topics notably confidence, communication, leadership and personal development. She also presents Hear My Story on Kent Christian Radio. Follow her on Twitter @workplaceglory and find her at http://uk.linkedin.com/in/kariskayode.

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